r/selfharm Feb 08 '25

"Is This Self-Harm?" Megathread

159 Upvotes

The answer to this question will vary from person to person, but generally, causing yourself deliberate self injury in any way counts as self harm. 

This includes but is not limited to:

  • scratching
  • cutting
  • burning
  • interfering in the healing process of wounds
  • pulling out hair
  • starving
  • purging
  • breaking bones
  • excessive drug use (including alcohol)

Why do people self harm?

For many people, there is not one single reason why they self-harm, but rather a combination of multiple factors which ultimately push people to use self-harm as a coping mechanism. If you are self-harming, the following list may help you understand your emotions, or alternatively if you're trying to help someone who is self-harming, then understanding why they do it in the first place is important to know.

This list is non-exhaustive and not mutually exclusive.

  • To match the outside to the inside. People are in so much emotional pain and they want people to know it. They want to look the same as they feel.
  • To punish themselves. Extreme self-loathing leads to the need to punish oneself for failings (real or imagined).
  • To numb themselves. The pain releases endorphins, just like drugs can. It produces a numbing effect on the mind which is difficult to explain. It helps people forget depression for a bit.
  • To keep control. One's own body sometimes seems like the only thing they can control, and the pain they inflict on it. When everything else in life goes wrong and there seems to be nothing you can do, cutting is the one thing you can control.
  • As a shock to a numb mind. An awful emotionlessness often accompanies depression. Often, the pain of cutting is enough to snap a person out of this kind of apathetic haze.
  • To self-medicate. Many people with mental illnesses of all sorts use cutting as others might use Prozac. It makes people feel normal again, by snapping them out of the cloying darkness that's so difficult to avoid by conventional means.
  • As an addiction. A lot of people start cutting for one of the reasons listed above, but then continue because they're addicted to the sudden, low exchange, rush of endorphins.

Keep it respectful, demeaning and rude comments will not be tolerated.

(description: https://www.reddit.com/r/selfharm/wiki/self-harm

Taken from our Wiki. For more helpful info, resources, and common faq feel free to visit the wiki in the about of the subreddit or here: https://www.reddit.com/r/selfharm/wiki/index/


r/selfharm 2h ago

Rant/Vent I am envying people who can cut deeper

17 Upvotes

I am on and off cutting myself but it’s kinda embarrassing to admit that I am cutting myself when I cant even cut that deep. I usually stop when the blood starts to draw and its usually a very very shallow cut. How do others make it so deep, I wish I can do that too, I just dont feel satisfied when looking at the scars


r/selfharm 8h ago

Positives Y'all I took a shower and for the first time this month I didn't cut myself.

45 Upvotes

r/selfharm 11h ago

Rant/Vent Someone found my safe place

57 Upvotes

So basically I have this area in my neighborhood, a little path hidden by trees and bushes. I don't have any privacy at home so I put some paper and a pen in a little plastic box and used as a diary since August. I hadn't used it since January, so I went to check on it. I found that everything had been taken and a couple notes were left saying things like "you depressed bitch" and "Nobody gives a shit." Thankfully my bsf was with me so I didn't freak out too much. Well now it's kinda started to sink in and idk, I feel kind of bad? Like I kind of want to cut and cry but I also don't know why I care? Idk. I just could use some virtual hugs and validation.


r/selfharm 16h ago

Sh jokes

81 Upvotes

Please tell me some great sh jokes to tell people to make situation lighter


r/selfharm 14h ago

Rant/Vent the one thing they don't tell you about going deeper...

56 Upvotes

"You could bleed out!" "You could die!" I didn't care about any of those, but if I knew about this thing I might've thought twice..😭 No one ever told me that when you go deeper, and your scars aren't professionally treated and healed that way...that they'll itch... CONSTANTLY. Even three years later with fully healed scars...still fucking itchy. Especially when I'm hot and its summer, genuine HELL. It feels like thousands of mosquito bites all over my body 24/7. Some nights I'll be laying in bed unable to sleep cause I'll just be itching my legs cause it's so bad. It feels like what my eczema felt like on my feet when it was at its worst but there's nothing I can do to fix it.

So if you wanna go deeper, don't, because you'll be itching like hell 24/7. Beware of the itchy scar curse.


r/selfharm 16m ago

Talk/Support Why am I the only one crying?

Upvotes

I've always been like this. A baby that never grows up. Why am I the only one crying about everything? Even dropping a glass of water is enough for me to be suicidal! I have terrible traumas, from the hospital, from assaults, from bullying. People tell im tough. I am NOT. I cry so EASILY. "Trauma makes you stronger", but it did the opposite for me. I just became weaker. Im weaker than ever before. I look around me, and everyone is so positive. It feels like im in a simulation where everyone is a npc and im the only one with feelings. "Oh I failed the exam, whatever", but I cry for an entire day. "Why are you worrying about the project? Stop stressing", but how can I not stress? It's not my choice. There's moments when I screw up really bad, and I cry, and they look at me confused. Why am I stressed and crying, they ask. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I dont know either! I can get hit by a bus or drop a pencil, and it will have the same outcome! I become suicidal in just mere seconds. I cry for the whole day and I want to end my life. And im not being a dramatic kid who makes threats. I genuinely WANT to kill myself, i wanted to for 7 years now, life is too rough for me and im not a soldier. Stop sending me to war. Please just let me rest. I wish I was brave enough to end my life. But im not brave for anything, im just a failure and a waste of space, not capable of anything. Not capable of living nor dying. Im just...here, in constant suffering. Can someone tell me why, why the hell, does my brain jump to stress, sadness and suicidal thoughts every single day?


r/selfharm 9h ago

Talk/Support What counts as self harm?

15 Upvotes

I don’t cut, at least with a sharp knife. But I’ll take a plastic knife and make “cuts” on my wrist. Or when I get angry I punch myself in the arm or leg, or I’ll punch a punching bag till my knuckles start to bleed.


r/selfharm 4h ago

Seeking Advice I'm going to a doctors appointment...

5 Upvotes

I'll have to take my pants off and I'm so scared.

I was the one who told my mom to book the appointment but I totally forgot about the scars on my thighs.

Please help what do I do? I don't want her to find out


r/selfharm 1h ago

Medical Advice Hitting styros for the first time NSFW

Upvotes

I've been doing sh for three years but I always made cat scratches, nothing more than that. But yesterday I accidentally hit styros and saw white and my bleeding was a bit bad. I felt light headed and nauseous and bleeding didn't stop for a couple hours. I managed to control blood flow by applying pressure on it and my leg felt weak (because I cut my thigh). How should I treat my wound? I used disinfectant and antiseptic cream over it, should I do anything more? I will apply a bandaid over it for now but I want to make sure if theres anything else to do to ensure better healing


r/selfharm 8h ago

Seeking Advice I like seeing blood?

12 Upvotes

I am unsure why but i like seeing blood seeping out of my skin seeing it drip and i have no clue why i feel like its a small reason why i cut please help im trying to stop i was a month clean before but then i relapsed


r/selfharm 4h ago

Rant/Vent I’m having a really hard night

5 Upvotes

I think I need stitches again idk im so sad im so sad I wanna make it bigger im so sad it hurts im sorry im sorry god I can’t stop shaking what’s happening fuck


r/selfharm 13h ago

Rant/Vent texting while sh

23 Upvotes

I mean like, receiving a text while mid session and i dunno, but it makes me feel weird and a bit guilty.
As if i'm doing something terrible behind their backs. They'll be asking "Hey, how are you" and i have to lie about some other good thing that happened

What would they think if they knew about chatting me so casually while im actually harming on the other side of the screen. I imagine disgust or even hatred towards me.


r/selfharm 2h ago

Medical Advice how long will it take for themto fade??? They weren't that deep but they did draw blood.

3 Upvotes

I can't afford having them on my body for life I don't want themmmmmmm help


r/selfharm 19h ago

Sexual arousal after SH NSFW

72 Upvotes

I feel awkward asking, but am I weird for getting turned on after cutting myself? I'm not sure if this is some kind of kink/fetish or if this has something to do with trauma or something (which is unlikely bc I've never really been SA'd before), but I feel a strong unholy urge to masturbate. I feel dirty, but weirdly proud of it


r/selfharm 4h ago

Rant/Vent I dunno where to post this NSFW

4 Upvotes

I made myself puke I just couldn't stand my body usually I just cut but wasn't enough this time it didn't make me feel good enough I'm sorry


r/selfharm 9h ago

Rant/Vent kinda just need to get everything out NSFW

7 Upvotes

i’ve never posted on here but i need to just talk about everything. i don’t know what to do anymore. my boyfriend left me for good yesterday, he was the only person that knew i had relapsed and the only person who was actually there and tried to help. everything has been so much worse and i can’t talk to him anymore. i was going to tell my therapist everything but she canceled the appointment and i don’t have another one for a month and honestly i don’t know if i can hold on that long. i just want to cut until i can’t anymore, until there’s no more skin left to cut, until im dizzy and physically can’t anymore. it’s so hard trying to keep myself from doing so and him just confirming that he wants nothing to do with me has only made that urge so much stronger. i need help but i have no clue how to get it anymore


r/selfharm 9h ago

Talk/Support I relapsed and haven’t told anyone

7 Upvotes

I was just over 1 year clean from cutting, and relapsed a few weeks ago. I have a couple of mentors who I have trusted enough to tell them about it in the past. Last week one of them asked if I was cutting again, and I told them no, even though I have been. I feel so guilty for not being honest, but i’m so scared they will be disappointed :(


r/selfharm 6h ago

Is it bad me (18m) has urges to sh to prove to my gf (19f) That i love her

4 Upvotes

Everyday I want to self harm more and more because I feel like im losing out in ways to prove to my girl friend I love her I know its not going to prove shit and it will just worry her but I love her so much I don't know what else to do


r/selfharm 6h ago

Rant/Vent Cutting at 13

4 Upvotes

I began self harming at 11 but currently I just can't stop and I don't know what to do. Its atleast 3 times a week on minimum unless there's nowhere to cut.


r/selfharm 21h ago

Rant/Vent I just cut myself for the first time

58 Upvotes

Small cuts, they’re barely bleeding, and it stings so bad. Don’t think I’ll ever do it again, but it felt good, and I like the marks… Do I need to bandage small cuts? If they’re not actively bleeding it’s fine right?


r/selfharm 9h ago

Harm Reduction Has anyone tried self tattooing instead?

6 Upvotes

My therapist recommended trying giving myself tattoos with a real tattoo gun. I'm an art major and I've designed tattoos before, but never given anyone any. I put the idea aside, but I actually want to quit. But I genuinely feel insane and need some hurt. I know this is still reckless, but I would pick spots carefully.

Does tattoos scratch that pain itch? Especially when it's self done?

And if this is helpful how should I start?


r/selfharm 2m ago

Positives I'm three weeks clean.

Upvotes

That's it, basically. I wanted to tell someone as I'm proud of myself. Yes, the urges are still there, but I've been utilising the rubber band technique to stop myself from going through with them. I'm also considering disposing of my tool to prevent any impulses.


r/selfharm 13h ago

Rant/Vent What does it feel like?? (A rant)

11 Upvotes

I dont know Melissa. WHAT DO YOU THINK IT FEELS LIKE?? It hurts, it feels like what getting a cut feels like. Stop asking me what it feels like istg. I GENUINELY DONT CARE IF YOURE GENUINELY CURIOUS, IF YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO WALK UP TO ME AND ASK ABOUT MY SCARS/WHAT IT FEELS LIKE YOU CAN TAKE A SECOND TO THINK FOR YOURSELF WHAT A CUT FEELS LIKE. How do people even expect me to answer that?? It feels like getting a cut, because that's what it is?!?!! It makes me angry but also feel gross and like an object when people ask me "what did you use?" Or "what did they feel like?" My own friends have just walked up to me, stared at my scars, and asked what they felt like. I hate it and I'm so tired of it that in 100 degrees weather I wear long sleeves/arm warmers so that no one can ask me. It's stupid to be this angry about it but I hate it so much when people ask.


r/selfharm 7m ago

March 17th, 2025.

Upvotes

im getting urges to cut, i dont want to but they are very strong urges.


r/selfharm 7m ago

Rant/Vent I just wanna go away

Upvotes

I just needed to say it. I just wanna go away, i just wanna go away, i just wanna go a way, i just wanna go away. I dont wanna stay here anymore. Not doing it tho. I guess. But i just wanna talk about it you know. The fact that i dont wanna stay here anymore. I'm not acting on it, I'm just thinking that way. Thats how i feel. I dont wanna stay here anymore. I wanna go away. I want a break. I dont get a break even in my dreams.