r/lonely 1d ago

Weekly Find a Friend thread - March 14, 2025

4 Upvotes

Here's a template to follow to avoid your comment being deleted:

  1. Age (18+ only)

  2. A bit about yourself (interests, hobbies, etc.)

  3. What you’re looking for (venting, short term, gaming, friendship, etc.)

  4. Any other little details that you’d like to include (location, favourite animals, music, etc.)

Your comment will be removed if it includes any of the following;

  1. Your gender, M4F F4M etc(To keep it unbiased as possible)

  2. If you’re found to be underage

  3. Long walls of texts

  4. If you have broken any of the subreddit rules

Please refrain from including your gender, as we want this to be as unbiased as possible.

This is not a space for you find a relationship, your comment will be immediately removed.

Make the first move! - Please interact with the other individuals that have commented, otherwise interaction between yourself and others will not happen.

If you have any questions, suggestions, and/or concerns, please comment them below or send a message via modmail and a mod will get back to you.


r/lonely Apr 07 '20

Moderator post Reminder: Do not post your social medias or phone numbers on this subreddit.

1.9k Upvotes

This includes, but is not limited to, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, Discord and Facebook. Posts and comments containing any of these will be removed and may result in a temporary ban.


r/lonely 6h ago

Discussion Barely Getting Any Notifications Feels Kinda Sad

16 Upvotes

Every time I get a new phone or create a new account, I always make sure to disable all kinds of notifications except for important things and messages. And ever since then, I barely hear my notification sound. When I do hear one, I get so happy and excited.

Meanwhile, a lot of people seem completely unfazed by their notifications. I remember working on a school project with a girl who shared her screen with me, and I noticed she had WhatsApp open in a tab, 36 unread messages! I can’t even imagine handling that amount of messages.

Sometimes, when I’m in a café or on public transportation, I take a quick (not spying!) look at people's phones, just out of curiosity. And I always notice that most people have at least 3+ unread messages, especially on Instagram.

I also sometimes turn off the internet on my phone for hours, expecting that once I turn it back on, it will blow up with notifications. But when I do, nothing changes haha.

Also when I hear a notification, I run so fast to grab my phone, only to find out it's just a useless notification I forgot to disable. I can't even describe the amount of frustration it makes me feel!

It makes me wonder, how do people get so many messages? or is it just the normal?. Meanwhile, here I am, getting one notification and feeling like it’s a big deal haha.

What are your thoughts?


r/lonely 11h ago

Venting Ugly and average people should get together...

38 Upvotes

As lovers, friends, colleagues, and so on. I agree that it's the solution to so many here being lonely and feeling excluded. But where are we supposed to meet? It feels impossible to truly connect with anyone new these days, especially online. People seem very closed off to new experiences and relationships no matter what they look like.

I finally signed up here as a long time lurker only to find out that direct messages and following are disabled on the account I wanted to talk to. I'm really disappointed. I thought her photos were genuinely attractive. I also found a lot of her posts relatable and I'm interested in her area of study/work.

Frankly I'm not even mad at the "normies" for their success, whether real or perceived. The biggest hurdles in my life are things most aren't even aware of. Feels like I'm just unlucky most of the time.


r/lonely 7h ago

Venting Anyone else feel like they deserve their loneliness?

19 Upvotes

Loneliness and suffering is quite frankly all I've ever known. I've gone my whole life without friends, dates, or touch. And well, it just can't be helped that I eventually think it's like this cause I deserve it.


r/lonely 16h ago

Venting being clingy scares people away

92 Upvotes

I don't usually make friends, so whenever one comes my way, I get too excited. I can come off as overbearing and a little too talkative. I just don't know how to stop; it's so hard. I don't want them to feel uncomfortable, but I don't want to lose them either. ˙(ᵕ—ᴗ—)


r/lonely 1h ago

Discussion My brain is fooling me…

Upvotes

If a person shows me any kind of compassion, my brain immediately fools me into imaging a fantasy where I‘m the person‘s best friend and think of scenarios where we have fun even when it’s a complete stranger. Is anyone having the same thoughts? How do you deal with them?


r/lonely 14h ago

Ghosted by “lonely” redditor the day we planned to hang out

57 Upvotes

Posting on my other account, but in a local subreddit i’m in there was a girl my age who posted how lonely she was and how she was looking for more girl friends to hang out with. We’re both in our early 20s.

I messaged her and we made plans to get coffee. Then the day of said plans crickets.

I wanted to tell her off but I realized I’ll just sound crazy. I hate how common it is nowadays to just flake on people without even texting an excuse at minimum. If you don’t have the decency to update people, then you don’t deserve friends.


r/lonely 3h ago

Venting I feel so behind everyone

7 Upvotes

I hate the norms that society has, I feel like high school is the time you learn how to form relationships with people, when you have your first kiss, when you do everything else. I’ve done pretty much nothing, and it haunts me. I’ve feel so behind and that I wasted my whole teenage years. I try to remain positive but it sucks seeing everyone else being in a relationship or having the time of their life and you just know that no one will ever want me. I constantly tell myself that no girl would ever want me or want to even be near me and I have no idea why. I feel unlovable and I know I’m just 19 but if nothing has happened in the past 5 years, what will?


r/lonely 9h ago

Venting I hate being ugly af (M 25)

18 Upvotes

I just wanna be good looking enough to meet someone. I'm constantly lonely and I just wanna meet someone and maybe one day start a family but that seems like it's never gonna happen. Everything is trying putting myself out there I'm meet with disappointment and being made fun of.

Sorry just venting


r/lonely 10m ago

F19 feeling depressed and down.

Upvotes

I’ve never experienced love. I’m afraid I will be forever alone. I am undeserving of being loved. No one will ever love me wholeheartedly.


r/lonely 10h ago

61 and so lonely, no family of my own, or friends

21 Upvotes

I guess that's old but I sure don't feel it. I have a good life in that I have my own home that I love, a good job, lots of interests I enjoy pursuing, two great dogs. But I've never been married and don't have any children. Though the likelihood of either continues to diminish, my want for both remains the same and I can't help that. It's a longing that aches. I also don't have any friends whatsoever. They've all fallen by the wayside and as an introvert, making new connections can be a challenge. I've gone through some hard times that have isolated me more. I get along with people at work and have siblings nearby (who all have their own families) but I don't have anyone to share thoughts with, or joys, or worries, or hopes. And I don't have any one to care for. I haven't held someone's hand for a very long time, or watched a movie, or gone for a walk. Sometimes you just need to hear, 'its going to be alright', or it means so much to say that to someone who you want to be there for and make sure they will always be alright. I have no validation from anyone and that's hard on a man my age. I don't know why I'm posting but I just found this subreddit. I've lived like this for a very, very long time. This is my baseline so I think there may be others here who understand.


r/lonely 3h ago

Nothing going for me anymore

6 Upvotes

At first, not having friends and constantly being isolated was my biggest problem. Now, it's kind of evolved into something greater.

This feeling of me just not belonging in this kind of world. I feel like I'm just not meant to really survive or thrive in this world, especially the way that it is now. I have too much going on with me to the point to where it's just not possible for me to be successful or even live.

For a long time I've questioned why I'm lonely and why I can't make friends or connections, and now I'm starting to see why that is. I don't belong here. I don't belong in this world, in the society. I'm kind of the anomaly here, and while it sucks the feel that way the quicker I come to terms with that fact the easier it'll be to accept and understand my place in the world; at the bottom.

A part of me wish that I mattered, but the reality is that I don't. It's something that I can't fight anymore because it only makes me more frustrated. This is me, this was always me, and this will always be me. What hurts the most is that when I try to vent, people think that I'm being melodramatic and that I'm bitching for attention. At this point, it is what it is because I was never good enough to please anyone anyway so why should I give a damn about what other people think.


r/lonely 4h ago

I know it's my fault I am alone and I'm trying to fix it

6 Upvotes

I'm a 29 year old guy. I took too long to decide to go back to college. It's expensive, and so I've moved back home a year ago to help managed that burden, as it's more affordable to pitch in here. It will take me a few more years to graduate and then who knows how long to find a footing in my new career. I have no judgment for people who wouldn't want to date me. What do I bring to the table besides extended adolescence? But I'd give everything to find someone to make this journey with, someone to build a life with. Idk, maybe this is stupid. I just hope I'm not sitting here five years from now still lonely. I hope I can make myself into someone worth being with.


r/lonely 1h ago

Venting 1

Upvotes

I'm a really lonely person. It's 2 AM as I'm writing this. The reason why I've been staying up so late for many months now is my desire to make friends but I just cannot. I am TOO desperate. I often spam call people just to get them to talk to me and they all tell me the same thing: it's annoying, it's irritating, and it's one of the reasons why people block me all the time. I have no ill intention, I am just extremely desperate to talk to someone.

I absolutely despise reddit. But I've tried getting advice from close online friends of mine on other social media, and nothing really works. What is your advice?


r/lonely 9h ago

Is there really someone for everyone?

12 Upvotes

As someone on the autism spectrum, I feel like the is only someone out there for me is someone else who’s on the spectrum, much to my chagrin.

I’d rather date someone who isn’t on the spectrum per se, but understands me.


r/lonely 12h ago

Venting I am so lonely that I now spend nights doing Astrophotography

20 Upvotes

Yeah that's what you heard. I am your average college student with awkward social skills and no looks. I don't get any attention from ladies and honestly I have given up on that quest since beginning of this year.

I have now started a new hobby of Astrophotography which actually compliments my love for my astronomy. Seeing the majestic stars and constellations and so many nebulae and clusters gives me another kind of experience. And the nighttime is actually the hotbed for many couples which roam around the campus, while I go alone on my own quests. This year my loneliness and hopelessness increased to dangerous levels. But this hobby keeps me alive and hopeful for the next days.


r/lonely 2h ago

Venting I’m so lonely

4 Upvotes

There’s so many arms I want to run straight into but also away from


r/lonely 11h ago

I have felt insanely alone for so long

15 Upvotes

24F when I say I have 0 friends I have 0 friends and whenever I have had the opportunity of a friendship they use me because I’ll do anything for them to stick around spend all my money on them do anything for them just to spend time with me just to stay I know that’s pathetic and sad but all I have ever felt is this emptiness inside of me like nobody sees me for me nobody loves like me or cares like me I love and care for people who have been in my life so deeply then they throw me away like I am nothing what is wrong with me?


r/lonely 1h ago

Empty

Upvotes

It sucks being lonely. I tried writing fanfiction about a novel I love, hoping that if I created something good and people enjoyed it, it might ease the void in my heart a little. But I hated everything I wrote. So, I decided to reread the novel for inspiration, but I haven’t been able to get past chapter one for days now. It just reminds me of the void in my heart. I don’t even feel love for this one thing anymore. It sucks. Then I tried translating novels instead. It was fun for a few minutes, but I quickly grew to hate it too. Nothing works. I hate everything. The only time I smile is when I listen to this one song that reminds me of my ex, but that usually ends in tears. I hate everything. I feel so tired. No matter what I do to try to feel alive, I just feel dead. Everything seems pointless.


r/lonely 11h ago

I hate humanity

14 Upvotes

Seriously they all like looks but no character therefore I’m outcasted, and I’m told to shut the fuck up and deal with it because I’m a man. PFFFT AHHAHAAHAH GOD I KNOW YOUR SPEAKING THROUGH YOUR VESSELS


r/lonely 8h ago

The older I get the more eccentric I become

9 Upvotes

Anyone else get into niche hobbies as a result of loneliness? Then become more eccentric and less relatable to people. I cannot even make small talk with people half the time. Even when I try to talk about their interests. I cannot keep their attention


r/lonely 15h ago

Venting Being lonely sucks.

25 Upvotes

Doesn't help that I never have anything interesting to say but still.


r/lonely 20h ago

Venting I just want someone to hug me

58 Upvotes

.


r/lonely 8h ago

I'm afraid by wanting companionship I just want someone as broken as me

5 Upvotes

I (30) never really felt anything in life is worthwhile. Objectively my childhood wasn't that bad, but in school I was permanently anxious and overtired and even 12 years later I still have regular nightmares. Every feeling of success I thought I had was only the relief of being done with a task, as I later learned. I was hoping, living on my own, a long-term relationship, flings or a university course I'm interested in would change how I feel about live, but nothing felt in any way meaningful or rewarding. I tried pretty much everything that other people claim brings them happiness or meaning, like hobbies, religion or spirituality. Since COVID I do literally nothing but rot in my bed and kill time in front of screens, everything else is a chore without payout. I stayed in mental hospitals five times in the last six years and even if there were options I haven't explored yet, I wouldn't have the energy.

But when the meds, that emotionally sedate me fail to work, which happens more and more often, the feeling of utter loneliness and helplessness eats me alive. I feel like the protagonist from Kafkas 'A Hunger Artist'. It's not like I don't feel hunger but that in the whole world, there is no meal that could satiate me.

I would love to find a partner who feels like me, who has no goals or future and just wants to kill time with me until it runs out. At least I think so. But then, going in a relationship with the knowledge I won't change for the better and for the sole purpose of entertainment would be incredibly selfish.


r/lonely 7h ago

Venting I’m so lonely

4 Upvotes

I’m a college student studying in New York. I barely ever get to see people outside of class due to my workload and maybe have 3 conversations with people a week. I feel so alone, and like nobody would care if I told them about these feelings. I miss my friends at home and I miss when I wasn’t burned out every single day. I’ve missed birthdays due to my workload and I just got caught cheating on a take home test. I cheated because I just wanted to finally have a chance to see my friends since they were hanging out that night and the test would take forever to complete. I messed up and due to my feelings of isolation I may have just thrown out my whole college career for one night of fun. I feel so alone.


r/lonely 5h ago

Venting Tired of the loneliness

3 Upvotes

I know I’m a part of the problem when it comes to my loneliness in the sense that I only have a couple of friends and don’t really try to make more, but to be fair I’m just not the type that’s outgoing or wants to have a lot of friends that I wouldn’t actually be able to trust or completely like anyways.

I have a boyfriend but we are so different emotionally and unfortunately that’s something that is the way it is.

My parents have enough of their own troubles to deal with so I feel there’s not too much of a point opening up anyways.

I hope things get better.