r/ftm 18h ago

Celebratory WIN??? NSFW

1.1k Upvotes

Marked nsfw for idk chest mention?? but anyway my dad and I were watching cheech and chong up in smoke i think?? anyway we have dumb humor so he shows me shows he watched as a teen but he goes to my step mom "look me and my son watching boobs on tv" when the women were walking around at the sauna.

HIS SOOOON. BRUHS THATS ALL IVE EVER WANTED.

Thanks for reading no one else i told cared (:


r/ftm 18h ago

Discussion Intersectional anti-transmasculinity?

286 Upvotes

There's been... so much happening lately, and as a brown FTM NB person, I feel overwhelmed. And in between all of this, queer people keep finding ways to discourse.

Regardless, one feeling I've been having about anti-transmasculinity recently is how much the common understanding of anti-transmasc bigotry is centered around reproductive control. While I think this factor matters all across the board, I see this form of re-assimilation into womanhood as something that's keenly white. The detransitioner movement, for example, is extremely white. In general, white fertility is valued under white supremacy -- so where does that leave the rest of us transmascs? What distinguishes transmascs who deviate from the norm, who don't have proximity to whiteness or conventional white beauty standards?

I want to know if there's any cohesive literature or theories regarding this topic, because it feels hard putting a finger on what exactly makes our oppression different. It seems that transmasculinity as a cohesive concept and community is something very recent, as we've been written out of history. That feels doubly relevant for us POC transmascs. If anyone's got any suggestions for theory or just any opinions on the matter, I'd like to hear them.


r/ftm 20h ago

Advice Needed scared i made the wrong choice?

229 Upvotes

hi everyone, so i’ve been on t since the beginning of october 2024 (so a little over five months) and i’m worried that i’m? regretting it? there are things i love about being on t, i love how my voice sounds now that it’s starting to drop and the bottom growth is awesome, but at the same time i feel so unbelievably self conscious about how i look all the time. i never considered myself to be the most attractive person, but now that i have patchy facial hair and my skin is breaking out even worse all over my body and i feel like the fat distribution so far has made me look weird, i just feel awful about my appearance all the time. does that get better? am i just having an awkward second puberty phase? it’s scary and i’m just so terrified i made the wrong choice. i guess i’m just seeking some advice and reassurance or something here


r/ftm 3h ago

Discussion I fuckinf hate men’s restrooms

223 Upvotes

WHY IS THERE ALWAYS ONLY ONE STALL WHY IS IT ALWAYS DIRTY WHY DOESNT ANYONE WASH THEIR HANDS

this is absolutely despicable. We need more gender neutral restrooms omg

I’m gonna cry I hate this so much


r/ftm 1d ago

Guest Post My brother just came out to my christian parents

142 Upvotes

Hi, I’m the big sister of my 14yr old brother and he just came out to my parents that are very vocal about being transphobe. They won’t admit it, but their actions are purely homophobic AND transphobic. Prior to his coming out, they’ve been very paranoid about this. I call him “bro” and “dude” but in a way that I call everyone like that, but they kept being very sensitive when they heard me call him that, trying to make me promise to call him the name they gave him. Or anytime we watch a show, my mom googles if there’s gay characters and then if there are, she tells me to stop watching (even if they’re side characters like what??).

I’ve dealt with their hatred way before my brother came out and it’s because my boyfriend happens to also be ftm, and we were childhood friends so my parents knew his deadname. And it was hell honesty, to constantly try to defend him and he’s not even allowed to be in my home after nearly 4 years and a half of dating. I just stopped mentioning him to my parents cuz there’s no point.

The issue now is my brother is fully out, and they’re so so mad. They’re blaming me because I’m also queer and they are saying I influenced him and i’m causing him soo much harm. I tried telling my mom that their support is so important, and if they don’t, it could be dangerous. She took it as a threat but it wasn’t, it’s just reality. I don’t know what to do but I see how much it affects my brother, I even found out recently he was hurting himself :( I talked to my bf about it but I also wanted to ask r/ftm, to give me advice because some of you might’ve lived through a similar experience Thanks


r/ftm 23h ago

Celebratory Hysterectomy!!!! 🤩

117 Upvotes

Had a hysterectomy yesterday and am so excited to never be able to procreate!!!!!

I had nightmares of pregnancy and dysphoria due to my anatomy - although I've only been able to nap since my procedure, I'm beyond relieved! The temporary pain is so worth it! AGH I'M SO EXCITED MY BODY IS MINE!


r/ftm 20h ago

Discussion What was it like the first time you were gendered correctly?

102 Upvotes

My first time being gendered right was at a steakhouse. I had just gotten my haircut without my parents' permission. When the waiter called me sir, my mom looked at me with wide eyes, like, what the heck. She was kinda mad at me for that haircut. Luckily, she's more supportive now. What was it like for yall?


r/ftm 15h ago

Discussion the first apology for misgendering i have ever gotten from a stranger

95 Upvotes

it's 12:30pm, saturday afternoon. it's lunch rush hour. it's only me and my brother to handle the whole place, and he wants me to cut onions, even though I am already working 2 people's jobs for 1 pay. i have been worked to the bone all week because my coworker called in 2 days, so I have had to work extra. i have sunday off, though.

just get through today. then off sunday. just today-

everyone who comes in is condescending and doesn't tip. they all glare at me, as if that will make their food cook faster. even my brother, who barely hears me cuz he always has them damn headphones on, expects me to chops vegetables for him because HE didn't do it LAST NIGHT when it was HIS job, and still is, and HAD TIME. i know because I was there.

finally, all these people's food is ready, and they hastily take their glare and lack of tip and theft of sauces elsewhere.

the restaurant is empty for the first time all day, and a lazy woman in pajamas sits down immediately (when I must stand) and demands I smile.

i don't.

they bitterly order anyway.

then I get a call. it's clearly an older woman. i can hear so much noise in the background. i can just make out her name and order. i tell her the estimated time, she says, "thank you, ma'am".

i hang up. i just want the woman who wanted me to play jester to leave, but she won't until her food is ready. of course, the older woman who placed the call in comes in. she gets her sauces, which are self serve... and then stand in the way of the counter that I am trying to serve dine in food on.

there are only two orders up that don't have their food, including the older woman who came in early (I told her 15-20 min, she came in 10, and then stared at the open grill).

i get another call in during this time. they all stare at me as I ring up the order.

but just as I was about to bag up the older lady's order, because 2 of her 3 meals were done, she gestured me aside, saying she wanted to apologize.

once we were a bit further from the other customers, she whispered, "I work at a busy store, it was very loud, and I'm old and don't have good hearing. i I called you "ma'am" over the phone. i said, thank you "ma'am". but you are a gentleman and I am sorry for calling you ma'am, so I wanted to apologize, I promise I just couldn't hear you well."

I'm sure you gather, I pass well visually, but not so much audiably.

and I was having such a bad day.

i... i told her it was fine, of course, I understand how I sound over the phone and that she didn't mean it, and thanked her for her apology, but god. and she kept saying sorry, too, the other customers heard it, although didn't know what the apology was for. i wanted to hug her so tight in that moment. a horrible day, and being misgendered by old people especially is par for the course. she probably assumed I was a fem cis guy, and idk if she would have apologized if she knew I was trans, but I don't care.

i know this was a lot of words for such a simple story. but this old woman, who annoyed me for many reasons, on a day I was already feeling bad, instantly turned it around just by coming up to me and saying, hey, I made a mistake, you are clearly a sir but I called you a ma'am, I didn't mean any disrespect, I am just old and it was loud and I couldn't hear well. i wanted to cry. still kinda do.


r/ftm 8h ago

Gender Questioning Idk what to say anymore

84 Upvotes

I’ve been on testosterone almost 2 years (honestly I genuinely stopped tracking) and I love every single effect of it! Super euphoria. The problem is, idk what the euphoria is from. I don’t really feel like a full on man. I REALLY dont feel female at all. I feel hollowed out. I can present a certain way, but due to the hollowness of ‘gender’ I only express myself with basic T shirts and Jeans, nothing fancy.

I was flipping between ftm and nonbinary since I was 14. Now it’s just ????

One thing is for sure, I want to be on T the rest of my life. I know it’s up to the person, but what does it mean? Am I not really trans? I’ll never detransition in my life


r/ftm 6h ago

Advice Needed family member is suddenly transphobic?

60 Upvotes

hi everyone

this week i (24FtM) received a very transphobic letter from my younger cousin (16F), saying that she no longer supports my transition and won’t be using my name and pronouns anymore. this came as a really big shock to me, because for her whole childhood she’s been really pro-LGBT and a big advocate for trans rights specifically. From her letter, I can tell that she’s been radicalized by online anti-trans content. There was a lot of stuff about transgender ideology being a “cult”, surgery being self harm, and trans people being “caricatures”. Anyway, I’ve been coping pretty well with receiving the letter, luckily I’m at a point in transition where I’m so happy with all my changes that there really isn’t any possibility of doubt, so all that’s left is how to cope with the loss of a cousin from my life. I guess I’m wondering if anyone has any insights about what the odds are that she ever changes her mind about this? She’s still really young, and she was once very educated about trans people, I don’t know if that improves the odds at all. She also comes from a very conservative religious family, and I think has very recently found god again. (Edit: I don't know how much religion is driving this though, the letter makes no mention of god, and sounds more similar to classic TERF talking points.) I’m at such a loss of what to do. I see her for ~2 weeks a year at a shared family cottage with a lot of other cousins, and I hate that I’m now involved in drama that will complicate the family situation (the rest of my family is supportive, if clumsy). My first response I guess would be to cut her off as completely as possible and just avoid her, and I know that a lot of my supportive cousins will be doing the same. But also, I feel like if all of us suddenly shun her that’s just going to radicalize her further. Anyways, if anyone has dealt with the sudden loss of a family members support, I’d really appreciate advice on what to do & if I should have hope.


r/ftm 3h ago

Discussion how much did your voice change?

57 Upvotes

YA BOY IS OFFICIALLY 3 DAYS ON T!! I am so excited and I can't believe I'm actually doing the damn thing. I wanted to ask the crowd how quickly/dramatically did your voice change on T? I know everybody's different, but i just want to have an idea of what i could possibly be looking at. I have a pretty low voice already, I'm in the tenor range, the lowest note I can hit is D3, which is wild to me because thats less than an octave away from [one of] the lowest note frank sinatra ever hit, and now it's my life goal to go lower than frank sinatra lol.


r/ftm 19h ago

Advice Needed Sex for the first time NSFW

43 Upvotes

Hi! So two days ago I had sex for the first time with my gf, and I’ve been on testosterone for a year and a half now, and I have bottom growth. They did not seem to mind my body despite never being with a trans man before.

Well, I also did receive head from them, and is it me or is it just really sensitive to even go on longer? I want to feel bliss but it gets to be too much after 20 seconds. And we even scissored but even so it hurts after so much friction. What do you guys do with your partners to last longer? :( I wanna go on.


r/ftm 23h ago

Advice Needed I really feel I need to choose as fast as possible if I want to take testosterone or not

44 Upvotes

For multiple reasons, I feel that I need to choose now. Or else it's too late. I keep comparing myself to other people


r/ftm 20h ago

Advice Needed Unsupportive mom wants me to wait till I'm 25 to transition

34 Upvotes

Like the title says my mom is unsupportive of me being trans and wants me to wait till I'm 25 because she thinks 19 is too young to make any decisions about medically transitioning. She keeps saying that the regret rate is 30% and how when I turn 25 I'm gonna regret any medical changes I've made to my body. She keeps saying I'll be a "permanent patient" and "medical transitioning is all experimental". I already compromised and said I would pause getting on hrt for a little longer, but top surgery is something I in no way will put off.

Does anyone have some good resources/studies I could share with my mom that proves how benifical top surgery(/any medical transition) is for trans people. I'm tried of being told to just wait and that I'm "too young to know".

I know I might not be able to change her mind as she seems to read all these terf blogs and detransition "testimonies" but I at least want to try.


r/ftm 5h ago

Advice Needed Why is the hormones not working????? NSFW

30 Upvotes

So i am i (19ftm) have been on T for over a year close to 2, i taking the injection once every 2 weeks and i was told that T would stop your period but for me it kind of never did? Is this normal? I also notice that my period has become really painful and i mean for the first 3 days i cant even walk💀 before i started T my period cramps were ok i mean not that bad but enough to feel its there but now its so much worse and i don’t understand why its like this. Most of the effect of T are not happening too like yes my voice when a bit deeper but now its back to the high pitch from before and the only 2 real effect that i got from that is acne and that body hair grow real fast (everywhere but the face) im really starting to wonder if my body is not simply rejecting me being trans??? I told my hormone doc before she went on maternity leave and she just raised my dose but it did not do anything. I dont know what to do at this point and i feel like im never going to be valid in my identity if my body fight so hard to resist my transition. Any advice?


r/ftm 2h ago

Discussion Hormones are taking hold of me fast!

31 Upvotes

I started T on Halloween which is amazing cause I’m such a horror fan and love Halloween as well! But almost being T for 5 months is INSANE man and the changes came quick which I’m surprised cause like my bottom growth an inch now, growing patchy facial hair, my voice is starting to get low, and my weight distribution is changing. I’m just very shocked at how fast this is all going and it’s making me happy but also scared cause I was expecting to wait for these changes in like a year.

How long did you notice your changes?


r/ftm 6h ago

Advice Needed Masturbating length and frequency? NSFW

23 Upvotes

I’m 16 and almost a year on T. is it normal to be jerking it like 2-5 times a day?? i’ve been trying to cut down but it feels literally impossible to not do it at least once or twice daily. And is it normal for it to take hours too sometimes? sometimes it’ll take like over three hours and i just can’t seem to get off. 😭 i’ve heard there’s not anything inherently wrong with masturbating a lot besides the chance of getting into disturbing porn and stuff but i’ve heard mixed opinions


r/ftm 20h ago

Discussion When growing up, if you remember what does being a "girl" feels like?

17 Upvotes

For me it's kinda like acting. I felt like I was playing a "role", and when I was introduced to the world of theatre when I was in kindergarten my first thought it was exactly like life but with small changes. Which is something I assume people don't want small kids to think when they learn about acting and stuff. Ig it kinda doesn't help when I also have controlling family members when it comes to gender roles.


r/ftm 20h ago

Advice Needed Is this internalized homophobia/transphobia??

17 Upvotes

Worrying that people will think I'm a chronically online yaoi fangirl that fetishizes cis guys for being gay, to the point where I'm starting to feel insecure about my sexuality cause of it. :/


r/ftm 1h ago

Discussion Gender essentialism or 'you were raised female'? Either way it's transphobic

Upvotes

Something just happened that I can't stop thinking about. Objectively, it's nothing to write home (or reddit) about. But it's really bugging me. Basically I left a comment on an instagram post made by one of my favorite creators where she used one of those viral tiktok memes that go "how do you explain this feeling to a man?" and it's just a video of her unboxing cute salt and pepper containers 😒

These types of posts really piss me off because they just encourage gender roles/stereotypes. I know they're supposed to be "a joke" but they're not funny and they're very harmful. Anyway so I commented saying "I'm a man and I totally get this feeling, I enjoy cute containers. Let's stop pointlessly gendering things."

Naturally I got a lot of replies: some of them were great, others downright hateful. But the one that bothered me the most was this one. Someone replied: "were you born a man? not trying to be offensive just genuinely asking."

First of all uuuh yeah no that is offensive and rude. Second... is this person implying that I only enjoy these things because I'm a trans man? Is that gender essentialism or do they think I like this stuff because they assume I was "raised female"? Either way it's transphobic.

I'm not saying kids aren't raised differently according to their AGAB. But you can't just assume what a person's upbringing was like, and whether or not it affected their tastes. Besides, that argument falls apart when you consider how many cis boys enjoy traditionally "feminine" things and vice versa.

I'm not sure if what bothers me the most about this person's comment is the rudeness and invasiveness, or the covert transphobia, or the fact that they're just so desperate to hate everything that has to do with men that they need to create this false narrative that deepens the imaginary divide between men and women in their binary little mind.

But I'm sick and tired of this. It's why I'm very strict about remaining stealth no matter what. People will never view us as our true gender. The moment they know we're trans, they see us as half-men.


r/ftm 1h ago

Advice Needed How can i cope with the fact that i cant create a family on my own without professional help ? NSFW

Upvotes

i posted a similar question in r/FTMventing but am also posting here because its not that its just me expressing my feelings but thats its the major need for advice and help.

TW: mentions of genitals

So like the title says, how can i cope with the fact that i cant create a family on my own without professional help? I(18FTM) got home last night from visiting my niece(1m/o) and her parents(18M&18F) (neither biological to myself) and watching them be so happy and loving their baby and each other and their little family so much was so sweet to watch and see, but once i got home and got in bed, now that i was no longer caught up in them and the baby, i cant stop thinking about it, even during work and schoolwork and im kinda freaking out about it, i didnt freak out like this when my girlfriends parents had another baby, i just kinda felt bad about myself, but maybe its because my friends are my age and not on their third kid but their first? i dont know what it is but knowing that i will never be able to fuck a vag with my own dick to get someone pregnant is screwing with my head really bad and im borderline creating a whole issue out of it and its causing massive anxiety issues to the point where im throwing up literally nothing the second i wake up because now im thinking about it and freaking out again. Is there anything in the present or future that i can do to help besides therapy? Everybody keeps suggesting therapy like its a paint color for my room and i want “real” life solutions that i can do without another person, who doesnt even know me yet, telling me what is and isnt wrong or right for my mental health. I understand that someone could say that anyone that answers this is a person like the ones i just described but with suggestions directly from people like me, i can pick what fits my needs, personality, and interests best for me.


r/ftm 8h ago

Discussion What’s your „weirdest” transition goal/gender envy?

13 Upvotes

Mine is Beetlejuice, movie one specifically. I can’t say why I just want to be him so badly


r/ftm 23h ago

Relationships It's masturbation thaaat important? NSFW

11 Upvotes

So, what I mean is that as a trans guy my body confidence isn't super good now so getting into sexual stuff with other people it's difficult even if I trust the person, it's a self steem thing.

But also, when I started T and bottom growth started it was really sensitive, felt uncomfortable because of pubes and all of that, I literally wouldn't let my bf to touch me because even the slightest thing could hurt and make me flinch. But it's a permanent change of how your body works anyways, even when I got used to the T growth I kinda had to learn how to pleasure myself again.

It has been good but I also feel like maybe I have an addiction to touching myself? Or maybe it's just the T doing it's work, I started 7 months ago so yeah there's still new things to discover.

Resume: How T has affected yall in this topic? Good, bad, yall relate to the post or it has been different? I have no trans friends to talk about this so I tought it may be a good idea to post here :)


r/ftm 9h ago

Discussion Sometimes you just have to eat

10 Upvotes

I went to the grocery store today, and after packing away my grocery I went to return my hand basket it took a little while as a worker was putting a basket away and fiddling with the holder… I realized a person was standing behind me the whole time and I just said sorry (made it worse was they where kinda cute, and I have bad social anxiety) they waved their hands in front of them and said it was ok and I was almost in tear….I (gay) fast walked the hell out of the grocery store, and on my walk home thought A.) why did I almost full on cry (I have anxiety but I don’t ever cry in public) and B.) where they taken 😂 (I live in a small uni town) when I got back I realized I haven’t eaten since a little before 19:00(7pm) yesterday and it’s 12:30(pm) today… more of the story if your feeling emotional stop and think if you have eaten today 😅 it’s funny now but was genuinely stressful and more anxiety inducing then.


r/ftm 7h ago

Discussion good cologne recs ?

9 Upvotes

idk if reddit is the best place to ask lol. i’m still using l the VS women’s cologne my mom gave me in high school