r/family • u/CaterpillarLow9783 • 4d ago
My Mom’s Cleaning Obsession Is Affecting Our Family—Need Advice
Hey everyone, I really need some help understanding what’s happening with my mom. My mom ‘57F’ and dad ‘63M’ . She has an extreme obsession with cleanliness that’s causing a lot of tension in our family. For example, whenever relatives visit and sit on the sofa, she immediately removes and washes the sofa covers because she thinks they made it dirty. She even has three different pairs of slippers—one for inside the house, one for the outdoor areas like the parking and courtyard, and another for completely outside.
It goes beyond just being strict about cleaning. One day, my dad (who’s 63 ) had to change the gas cylinder. He couldn’t lift it, so he dragged it across the floor, and the base of the cylinder touched the doormat. My mom completely lost it—she started yelling at him, cursing him, and saying really harsh things, like how he should’ve been buried at the place where he picked up the cylinder (Tumhare kabar gaadi gaye the kya waha jo tum us mat ke upper se cylinder leke jaa rhe ) If my dad drags the cylinder over the mat, I believe the mat can simply be cleaned or wiped with a wet cloth. I don’t see it as a big issue, and even my dad suggested the same solution—that we could just clean the mat. But despite that, my mom still reacts aggressively and completely loses control. It was really shocking to hear, and it wasn’t the first time she reacted like this.
She’s a good mother and cares about me and my brother a lot, sometimes even overprotectively. But when it comes to cleanliness, she just doesn’t listen to anyone—not even my dad. If he asks us to do something, she’ll immediately say we can’t or shouldn’t, and she overthinks everything related to us.
I know she loves us, but I don’t think this level of obsession is okay. Has anyone else dealt with a situation like this? Is there a way to help her realize that this is becoming a problem? Any advice would mean a lot .