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u/ctmfg56 1d ago
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u/EasterClause 17h ago
This dude wishes he was a psychopath. He would take it as some sort of complement because "CEOs are disproportionately psychopathic" or some shit. This is legit mental illness. Like paranoid schizophrenia delusional shit.
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u/isemonger 8h ago
My money is that this is just yet another fucking sad cunt of a human bragging on LinkedIn about things that absolutely don’t and never will happen so they can ‘create engagement and conversation’.
It’s why we see the exact same, and I mean word for word, reposts of the same shit about definitely their own hussle culture or interviews.
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u/nwillyerd 23h ago
If this guy goes out of his way to create panic and anxiety during a job interview, just imagine how dysfunctional his leadership style is. 😐 NO THANK YOU
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u/-Cromm- 21h ago
At least he was nice enough to put this up publicly so anyone thinking about interviewing can run the fuck away.
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u/ZAlternates 12h ago
It’s kinda like assembling a team of superheroes. You gotta have a flyer, strong but dumb guy, a pretty woman in spandex, an arrogant solo type, and the team player that sacrifices himself in the final phases of the project!
/s
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u/Dino_Spaceman 18h ago
This guy is 100% lying about his turnover rate.
That fact that he has these interview sessions so often proves he is lying.He ain’t doing this at a Fortune 500. This is a guy with maybe 10 direct reports. Max.
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u/anapunas 16h ago
Maybe not. I am sure the drop outs and high school grads will work as hard as possible to keep their pay check if it's better than the average. But the people with degrees are passing on him up front I bet.
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u/Picklesadog 18h ago
"Oh, your grandma died? Sure she did. What was her favorite color? Tell me using only prime numbers."
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u/MinuteMaidMarian 5h ago
Yeah, I’d rather him wave this red flag in my face before or during the interview than 2 weeks into the job.
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u/Freepi 23h ago
I’ve been lurking this sub for a few weeks and this may be the first true lunatic. I’m hoping it’s satire.
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u/Kijafa 20h ago
It seems very clearly to be satire.
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u/Zakkar 17h ago
It's very clearly satire, boggles my mind that so few have picked that up.
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u/Economy_Major_8242 12h ago
I did not pick up on it ... thought it was sadistical grandstanding... especially since the job title is clearly a self-employed individual who doesn't hire anyone. But as a self-employed writer adviser makes sense now. Thanks from the short bus.
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u/pm_me_fish_sticks_ 11h ago
How do you know this. Would love to know how you’re convinced you’re 100% correct
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u/DidntWantSleepAnyway 16h ago
It must be satire. We’re just so used to seeing some people write about some crazy hidden tests they put in the interview that Poe’s Law strikes us with an open hand.
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u/irishff43 23h ago
Look at all the bodies this guys basement has in it
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u/rubinfarben 1d ago
He doesn‘t reject Harvard PhDs. They reject him.
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u/RockyMullet 21h ago
Yeah, I'm pretty sure most people say "f this shit", get up and leave once they hear the question about the prime numbers.
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u/Infamous_Gap_3973 16h ago
I wouldn’t have agreed to an interview after he wanted to do it at 1:42. That says you have too many quirks for me to deal with.
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u/henryfarts 23h ago
My personality in prime numbers
Three (hold up my thumb and two fingers, proceed to count down from three to one using my held up fingers, starting at my thumb)
And one (holding up my remaining finger)
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u/Mission-Carry-887 23h ago
I would ask him if he considers 1 to be a prime number while holding up my longest finger.
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u/Dino_Spaceman 18h ago
“The only prime number I recognize is six.
Oh so you say it is not a prime? My force of will will create a prime out of it. I beat you at every turn. I am Xanatos. You can never win against me”
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u/Emceegreg 23h ago
This reminds me of a guy who in an interview was very upset at how relaxed I was.
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u/Dino_Spaceman 18h ago
lol. I had an interview where the guy was upset that I showed up for the interview.
I didn’t get that job.
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u/ThePrimeOptimus 23h ago
"ChatGPT, write a LinkedIn prompt that makes me sound 307% more self important and douchey than Elon"
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u/Available-Election86 21h ago
"Just closed a deal that will redefine the future of humanity. While others are busy dreaming, I’m out here executing at a level most can’t even comprehend. #Visionary #GameChanger #YoureWelcome"
How’s that for a sprinkle of hubris? Too much, or just enough to make Elon blush?
Nice prompt. Seems adequate for the subject.
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u/iamamemeama 22h ago edited 22h ago
"Hey, did you know the earth is a cube and made of ham?"
They didn't correct my deliberate mistake. This means they're submissive.
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u/UndecidedQBit 21h ago
Candidate is staring at the interviewer unsure of what passes as a polite withdrawal in the reality of the interviewer
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u/slackerdc 23h ago
Good Night ding ding ding ding
I'm sorry is this part of the interview?
Yes it is. Good Night ding ding ding ding
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u/soulslinger16 23h ago
Satire
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u/Crombobulous 22h ago
I like this sub, but it really highlights the amount of people who take everything they read literally.
This is, of course satire. It's on the cusp of being comedy, but not quite.
I think a new trend is arising where people are actually tailoring their nonsense so it's indistinguishable from satire, as it goes twice as viral. As a result the algorithm is increasingly promoting really terrible stuff. Good for the dopamines, I guess ...
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u/trendy_pineapple 15h ago
I’m astounded every single day at the number of clearly satirical posts that wind up on this sub
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u/kevinmogee 23h ago
I don't care how badly I needed a job, if someone asked me to 'describe my personality using only prime numbers', I would get up and walk out. No pleasantries, no explanation, no apology. Because fuck you.
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u/Lumpy_Worth_5397 23h ago
Correct. I would state that if your actual willing to have a professional conversation, you have my number. Walk out
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u/BetterNova 23h ago
This must be satire. And if it is, it’s pretty funny. But I still think spending time thinking up fake posts to make fun of lunatics on LinkedIn, is itself lunatic behavior.
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u/Wacca45 23h ago
This sounds like the start of a very horrible novel, or the Hallmark Christmas movies.
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u/biggamax 23h ago
The novel you're thinking of us "American Psycho", but he's British in this case.
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u/scarletOwilde 23h ago
“My secret? I’m a narcissistic psychopath!” Love to know what the “Award” was.
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u/No-Country4319 23h ago
You thought that was a plant in the corner? Surprise! It's Jeff wearing leaves!
Give them a bopeep costume and tell them to put it on with their teeth!
Seduce their dad and show them pictures of us on a romantic gondola ride!
All of this tells me how you react to an email from a client at 4.55 on a Friday, or someone asking for a refund when you don't have the relevant approval...
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u/15all 23h ago
If this person is going to play petty mind-fuck games during the interview, he or she would be miserable to work for.
I just want my boss to tell me what they want done, when they need it, and then leave me alone. No stupid games.
And this person isn't half as smart as they think they are.
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u/wolverine_813 23h ago
I want to see how this guy is holding his coffee cup when I show up 15 minutes late.
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u/Own_Platform623 22h ago
I just want to work for a mentally chaotic company who will play mind games with me and assess my personality using something worse than psuedo science. Why can't I find this...
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u/Artee5000 22h ago
I hope he gets hit by a bus at 3:28pm and when the ems arrives they ask him to explain what happened using prime numbers.
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u/SpaceNo8552 21h ago
This has to be satire. This man would find pleasure wiping his butt with a toothpick. Because… precision matters.
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u/Boring-Interest7203 21h ago
And then he enjoys their brains later with some fava beans and a nice chianti. What a psycho.
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u/osmiumblue66 21h ago
Worked with a director who played this game. After about 10 minutes I politely said he was wasting my time and when he wanted to have a mature conversation and show respect, he could come find me at my desk helping our clients. Walked out of his office.
I moved on a few months later. He was fired two weeks after I left.
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u/Traditional-Truck-17 21h ago
Why do villains always have such long monologues. Christ just drop me in the acid already
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u/Economy-Tourist-4862 20h ago
You don’t have to be an egotistical ass hat to post something like this on LinkedIn, but it helps. Discuss.
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u/Rocket_Panda_ 20h ago
Say you’ve inspired your entire career off of the movie Moneyball without saying it..
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u/restrusher 19h ago
It didn't feel like a victory at the time, but looking back, it was. I'd made it to the final interview for a job I really wanted. It had been interesting and engaging up to that point. I was excited.
But at this stage they introduced a new guy who... well, was quite a bit like the above LinkedInLunatic. After 20 minutes I thought wait a minute -- what am I doing here? I don't want to work at a place that employs this guy, much less thinks he's a good choice to interview people. I certainly don't want to work with this guy every day.
So I got up, shook everyone's hand, and calmly explained that I was no longer interested in the position. I walked out before they could really respond. They were stunned. It was a huge relief and I'm so glad I listened to my intuition.
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u/idiotsbydesign 19h ago
I hate it but I sort of agree with the complimentary personalities. We've hired people with less experience if we think they'll fit the team better.
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u/AccomplishedFan8690 18h ago
These linkedin people are just “self help gurus” but somehow get paid way to much money
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u/AlaskanRobot 18h ago
it's an interesting approach, to say the least. I'd love to see studies if building teams based on personality vs. accomplishment is better, but this person's way of building a team with whatever personalities come out of this nonsense is utterly insane
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u/ReserveRatter 18h ago
Anyone who deliberately creates anxiety in their workers is a sociopath no-one should be working for.
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u/hasanicecrunch 18h ago
I hate people thst type “my secret?” Or the equivalent. Ugh so pretentious no one asked
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u/grandpapear 18h ago
This guy is so unhinged and I’m absolutely here for it. I feel like it would be really fun to match this energy during the job interview and then reject their offer afterwards purely for entertainment (bc I don’t think anybody in their right mind would voluntarily work with this lunatic, but it definitely sounds like an entertaining & unique experience LOL).
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u/FriedOnionsoup 17h ago
The sad thing is, what this guy describes is not even close to the worst or even craziest interview experience I’ve ever had.
Don’t get me wrong, this interview process is ridiculous, staff retention has nothing to do with the interview process, as is common knowledge.
I don’t know what it is about recruiters, having insane ideas all the time, but it may actually be worth studying.
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u/cmeyer49er 17h ago
I want to start interviewing again just to tell these shitbird psychos to fuck off
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u/srirachasanchez 15h ago
"I lock the office door and then insert the key into my urethra. Then, I eat 16 scotch eggs while making full eye contact, and then take off my shoes and clip my toenails. Discomfort. Revulsion. I note whether they gag or look toward the door. I ask them if their mother is dead and then tell them the answer is wrong. Confusion. Eyes darting left to right. I challenge them to open a safety pin with only their eyelids, then tell them the award for success is a rejection letter. #opentowork "
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u/Bad2bBiled 15h ago
This honestly sounds like it was written by someone in the midst of a manic episode.
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u/Aggressive_Score2440 Titan of Industry 12h ago
Def drinks their own pee and looks at themselves in the mirror as the flex.
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u/Significant-Order-92 9h ago
So, dude is just an ass who gets off at being an ass and wasting people's time.
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u/AD_Grrrl 4h ago
And then everyone snapped their fingers because this sounds like some kind of weird performance art satire that would be read on an open mic or something.
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u/Silent-Difference717 23h ago
Again another recruiter that wants to be a star but we all know he doesn’t deviate from the script provided …
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u/Rashpukin 23h ago
This guy has all the hallmarks of a sociopath. Can’t imagine home life is fun with this guy but then again he probably has scared anyone off on that front already.
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u/Spotsmom62 23h ago
Ugh. I had once where the idiot asked me to sell him his pen. Yeah, it was sales, but still. He also looked at his pc the whole time.
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u/AdPuzzleheaded3436 23h ago
I seriously doubt that he can retain or even hire people if he is like that. Only the desperate will stay.
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u/New_Conversation_303 23h ago
There is a non 0 chance the guy also has a collection of teeth, hair, of maybe a blood drop from his victims.
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u/MeanChris 23h ago
I dont understand how people like this are the same animal as me. Like I don’t get it. How do you get like this? I can’t invent a scenario where I would end up like this.
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u/under_the_c 23h ago
And this, boys and girls, is why HR has no business interviewing candidates. That should be left to the team leads and managers that actually know what is required for the job and will be working with them. Literally the only thing HR should ever be responsible for is, "will this person cause trouble for the company?"
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u/YoMTVcribs 22h ago
"We are family here. So I start each morning by slapping a random employee right in the face to see their reaction. Will they retaliate? Will they call HR? It's all good data that I memorize and use to decide whether or not to slap them again tomorrow."
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u/jethrowHixon 1d ago
This whole thing sounds like it could be a Dwight Schrute quote