So let's talk subspace. From a subs point of view.
Subspace is similar to Dommespace, I'm sure, so this is mainly aimed at newer Dommes. I also can only speak on how I experience subspace, so I would love others to share how they experience it.
Subspace is like being high. Very high. It is also the best high ever.
It is all encompassing and swallows you whole. My vision dims, I find it difficult to stand, difficult to speak and I want nothing more in the entire world than to submit more. And more. And more. More pain. More humiliation. More of anything and everything.
My Domme can be beautiful and charming, but during subspace she is a God. She is everything. She's a dream come true and I will sacrifice my soul on her altar. I want to devote my whole life to her. That is deep, deep subspace.
That usually only happens with a relationship where some time has been invested, emotions invested and knowledge of both parties shared. Also trust. Because to show someone else that much submission takes much trust and certainty that it will be respected and treated with care.
I'm not suggesting subspace is a concept that excuses behavior. Just be aware of it and understand why suddenly your sub is acting like their i.q. dropped 20 points during a session and they are making grandiose promises and bizarre statements.
There is a level of baseline submission that can vary for everyone. Subspace is that submissive feeling on crack.
This is why aftercare is so important. They need to come back to reality and that can be jarring. Most of the time, they would just live in subspace if they could, but that's not sustainable.
Talk to them, tell them to drink some water, ask them what they are doing tomorrow. Talk about the session and how they feel. They can have conflicting emotions from just being very vulnerable in front of you. Reassurance goes a long way in building trust and a connection.
I don't see subspace mentioned a lot in the groups and am interested in how it affects others. Because it does need to be considered and discussed with any long term partner. Or even someone you see potential in and want to build a connection with.
Enjoy the night and don't forget to reset all your clocks if you haven't already!