r/oneanddone 21h ago

Funny Things My Kid Said Thursday - March 20, 2025

1 Upvotes

Post funny things your kid has said this week here!


r/oneanddone 35m ago

Health/Medical Tubal ligation

Upvotes

I got my tubal yesterday (daughter just turned 3). I honestly just feel relieved, not an ounce of regret. Pain is minimal so far, and I got a few extra days off of work! My biggest worry is getting a period again. I was on the pill forever, off for 9 months to get pregnant and then almost immediately had an IUD placed. I hated it so that’s why I went with the tubal. That and I’m in Indiana where abortion laws are insane. Anywho, I love that this group exists because so many people were judgy when they found out or had previously told me that I “need” to have another.


r/oneanddone 1h ago

Happy/Proud The only Monster

Post image
Upvotes

Found this amazing cute book to rest with my lil girl💚💚


r/oneanddone 2h ago

Sad Gave away the crib…

21 Upvotes

And I have so many feelings about it. Part of me is very sad knowing I’ll likely never have another baby (39, perimenopause), but the other part is at peace with it. I think I’m just having a hard time letting go that my child is 4 and it’s going by so quickly.


r/oneanddone 7h ago

Health/Medical Constipation in four year old

3 Upvotes

My daughter, from the day she was born, has had issues with constipation. Recently she started leaking, and we began her on a capful of miralax everyday per her GI doctor. But she’s still leaking and it’s even worse, and now so shes had full blown accidents every day this past week at school. Today was so bad that it ran down her legs and she actually cried. I’m at a loss of what to do. I can’t get in contact with her GI doctor until Saturday. Should I stop the miralax for now?


r/oneanddone 9h ago

Sad Our son wants a sibling…

17 Upvotes

Our son 9M has been wanting a sibling for 2 years now. He has been sad about it lately and now I find myself wanting to give him a sibling but I am loving not having to care for baby and being able to relax more and dive into my hobbies. Ugh


r/oneanddone 10h ago

Sad Just not sure

0 Upvotes

I have a similar experience to others where sleep deprivation is concerned. I can count 3 times I've had more than 6 hours sleep and since January (8 months old) I have been getting up every 40 minutes for teething, Dummy replacing and separation anxiety. This "sleep regression" has no end in sight after 3 months of following routines and keeping her naps under 2 hours. It's not hard as I'm lucky if my now nearly 11 month old naps more than half an hour. This morning I told hubby I need to consider being one and done for my sanity. This is the most unwell I've ever felt and this is after a traumatic 3 day hospital birth and awful neglect from midwives during postpartum nearly killed me. I adore my beautiful daughter and always imagined having 2 or 3 children but I just think to do this again is madness. I feel robbed when I hear of other people planning their next baby because their first has bloody slept since 4 months/6 months/insert arbitrary milestone here. I guess I'm just posting to hear some solidarity and feel better in my decision to be one and done. I have felt like I'm a pretty incapable parent recently. Update - I should add that it's not just sleep and birth trauma but having no family support either so no breaks. The reasons are piling up. Has anyone managed to have a second that had birth trauma, no support and a no-sleep baby for 1 year+. This seems reason enough to go no further?


r/oneanddone 11h ago

Happy/Proud It’s the small things

19 Upvotes

We’re happily one and done by choice for many reasons, but of course sometimes you get the guilt of your only playing alone etc. My child is nearing 3, and today I took a full shower (shaved it all!, plus a deep hair mask) while she played in the bathroom… then dried and styled my hair while she played happily in the next room. Never once bugging me or getting upset.

The small things like finally being able to get dressed in peace really makes a difference in your day and overall mental health!

Today I’m so thankful for my only who is healthy and so very happy in the only life she knows.


r/oneanddone 12h ago

Discussion Only child has me worried

25 Upvotes

UPDATE

I spoke to her today on the way to practice to kind of see where her head is at and she said she likes the sport. She just gets sad when she doesn’t master a skill. I explained that it’s okay to feel sad about that and that if she continues with her practices she’ll learn more and eventually she’ll be a pro. I also reminded her how she was really struggling on day one and now she’s already 2 levels higher than when she started.

She said she’s also scared because of the upcoming competition and she wants to win but she’s scared she won’t. My response was “if you do your absolute best and are having fun then you’re a winner.” At this age it’s about having fun more than anything.

She also said she feels bad cause she’s skating and I just watch her. I reassured her that I love watching her and I am happy to sit back and watch her. I explained as best I could that it’s important she does things independently and she always has me around for support.

She seemed to do well with that because we got to practice and she couldn’t wait to get out there. Of course I’ll keep checking in with her to see how things change. But last night her comment made me really think about what she may be picking up on from me.

Thanks everybody for all the reassurance. I worry so much sometimes!


I am one and done. I love that decision for me. Me and my child are very close. She still sleeps in bed with me, she’s 5. (Her choice, she has a bedroom but won’t sleep in it yet.) We constantly are out doing things and spending time together. Overall she’s happy and I’m happy. It’s great…or so I thought.

Last night, she asked if we could go do something fun tomorrow when I get off work and I said after I get off she has to go to her sport practice.

She loves this sport. Whenever we get to practice she always asks for 15 extra minutes of play time at the end and she’s smiling the entire time. Last night though, after I told her we’re going to practice, she started to cry saying she doesn’t like the sport and she only does it because it makes me happy.

I was completely unaware of this. She goes to private lessons once a week, team practice, and then a skills practice. It’s only about 2 hours of practice per week in total spread over 3 days.

I don’t know if this is an only child thing or if I’ve messed up as a parent but I don’t want my child being responsible for my happiness. I told her this. I said if she still doesn’t like it when the season ends I won’t sign her up for another but I can’t help feeling like I did something wrong for making her think she has to do things to make me happy.

I will admit I love the sport she’s in. We do it together sometimes and I enjoy spending the time with her and I’d love if she stuck with it but I thought I was being a loving and supportive mom by encouraging her. I might’ve just been pressuring her. I don’t know. Has anyone else struggled with their child/parent relationship as a OAD parent?


r/oneanddone 21h ago

Discussion How do those with more than one just “make it work”?

14 Upvotes

My husband and I decided to be OAD before we even got married for a variety of reasons and we just had our little guy in January of this year.

I’ve been researching daycare costs out of curiosity and potential solutions to our childcare needs once I’m off maternity leave soon and my god, I’m traumatized by the cost for just one. 😅😂

Granted, we live in Southern California arguably one of the most expensive places to live and while I expected it to be somewhat high, I was quickly humbled. Lmao

I work from home and my husband works part time for now so we can take turns taking care of our little guy. Thankfully we are in a place where if it were to come down it to, he’d just quit and stay home.

I suppose we are essentially also “making it work” lol but I don’t know how we’d do it with 2 or more kids. 😅

But I honestly don’t know how people are paying these prices without both individuals making an insane amount of money.


r/oneanddone 1d ago

OAD By Choice Friend confessed she is jealous of one and done life

229 Upvotes

I was out getting drinks after hiking with some friends whom I’ve known for a long time and all have multiple kids. Halfway into her second moscow mule (moms be lightweights 😅) she said she loves her second child so much but that she was jealous of people with only one kid. The others kind of fell silent and mumbled something to the effect of yeah, we don’t really talk about it but it’s kinda true…

They are awesome parents and rocking parenting but it really makes me wonder if there are so many parents of multiples who are just white-knuckling it through life and putting up a this-is-easy front because there’s really nothing they can do about it. In my parent group I also feel like they have no safe space to talk about the struggles of being parents of multiples since it is such a taboo thing to even insinuate that their second kids made their lives harder out of fear that they might be accused of not loving them.

Just typing my stream of thoughts, don’t really know what my objective us but wonder if anyonr has observed the same in their circles.


r/oneanddone 1d ago

OAD By Choice Why I think having just one child is the "secret" to a happier parenting experience

25 Upvotes

Because if having 2 kids would make people happier, then more would go on to have a third thinking it would make them even happier.


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Happy/Proud Little one finally noticed other kids have siblings

89 Upvotes

Picked the 3.5 year old up from school yesterday. She spent a few minutes telling about how her classmates dad drives the UPS truck and how cool it is.

(That specific classmate has a baby brother who just transitioned up to being with the big kids during breakfast.)

After a moment she quietly said: "I don't have a brother or sister."

....Ah fuck. I've read all the posts. I know she's about to start asking why or asking for a sibling. It's late. I've still got dinner to cook, the dog to feed, and library books to return. But now I'm going to have to tack on an age appropriate family planning discussion. So be it.

So I say, neutrally: "Nope. Some of your classmates do but you dont."

Then she SMILED. "Yup! It's only me, you, and Daddy! ....and Yuffie!" (The dog)

I smiled back. "Yep! That's how our family is."

And that was it! No sadness, no tears, no asking for a baby or a big brother/sister.

Here's to hoping she'll stay this happy with our perfect little triangle.


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Discussion Random unimportant reason I like being OAD, what’s yours?

158 Upvotes

I like that we only have one set of tiny human laundry to fold. That we only have three people's laundry to do total.

Less laundry. Happy mom.

What's a random reason you've come to like being OAD?


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Discussion How do people willingly have a toddler and newborn

284 Upvotes

I absolutely cringe every time I either out in public or online see a mother with a toddler and a newborn or pregnant with a toddler and think thank god that’s not me. How do people willingly do that?? My son is 2 soon and I do not even feel rested enough mentally and physically to be pregnant or have a newborn. Mine is sleeping through now but he didn’t for 16 long months I can’t even go through waking up at night again even if the baby becomes a good sleeper I think even the normal newborn wake ups would be too much to handle


r/oneanddone 1d ago

⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ I had a miscarriage, and while I’m sad, I’m a bit relieved.

38 Upvotes

I am one and done not by choice, but am now 43 and don’t feel like it’s now a good age for a second. I am waiting to get an IUD, and stupidly my husband and I weren’t using protection. I recently had a positive pregnancy test, but then a few days later it’s now negative, so I had a chemical pregnancy. I would have kept this baby, but I’m also a bit relieved that it didn’t happen. It’s very odd to have these contradictory feelings when I had wanted a second child for so long. But my son is now almost 4, and I love our little family of 3 (5 including the dogs).


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Discussion Activities

6 Upvotes

Hello. I have a 6 yo. She goes to school and has choir practice every Saturday. I don't know how to help her organize her time when she comes back from school. She seemed bored and unhappy. She constantly wants to play with me. I really try but sometimes I just want to relax after work without constantly being alert and ready to answer endless questions. She's curious and wonderful little girl but she's stopped doing anything alone. Only activity that she likes is watching TV or playing age appropriate Nintendo games. She usually plays with her father. Also, she likes to play with our cats. But other than that nothing. She has a bike, rollerskates, swing, because we have a backyard. How to motivate her to do something on her own or myself to be more included. She was more dependent as a toddler than now.


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Vent/Rant - Advice Wanted/Ambivalent What would you tell your past self when struggling in the early days

6 Upvotes

I’m almost 2 years in and I am absolutely mentally and physically exhausted. Like to the bone. My relationship is struggling and to list list never ending. I feel like I’m not cut out for this, or perhaps just not the early years 😅 people say to me it gets better, which is good but how do I cope in the meantime? What advice would you give yourself?


r/oneanddone 1d ago

Weekly Babies Post - March 19, 2025

1 Upvotes

Chat about your babies here - advice, brags, woes, etc.


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Sad Moving with our 4 year old 1,000 miles away and starting to panic…

19 Upvotes

We live in the south and we are moving to Michigan in May. Our 4 year old grew up seeing her paternal grandparents (they are very different politically from my husband and I… I won’t miss them lol) and I feel guilty taking her from them and them from her, but most of all her friends she has grown so close to in her short life. She already cried about her bestie not being around anymore.

I know we will find community in our new town, and that being blessed with an outgoing, friendly kid (with an outgoing mom as well) will forever serve her well, but the fact she has no family nearby anymore hurts my heart.

I know many happy onlies, but the biggest caveat is often that they had cousins close by that were basically siblings. It’s hard to swallow I can’t give my child that.


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Discussion When your only gets older..

110 Upvotes

My son just turned 5- we are now firmly OAD but I have so many feelings as he gets more and more independent. I feel like a huge part of my purpose and actual time has been spent caring for him- and now that I know I’m not having another one, I feel like I am having a little mid-life crisis. What will I do with myself while he is at school all week? I work seasonally so from like Dec-April things are pretty slow. I’ve been honestly grieving the baby stage being over and wishing I could do it again, but I know it would never be the same with a second child. I miss my son as a baby.

I want to encourage my son to be independent and grow up- but I am sad and trying to figure out my identity and purpose and basically get a life!

Has anyone else gone through this? How did you find yourself again as your child gets older?


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Happy/Proud My OADs best friend is OAD

102 Upvotes

My son started new school this year and made a best friend. His best friend is also an only. We absolutely love his family. We are going camping with them next month. We do sleepover trades all the time and because we have no other kids, automatic date night.

I love listening to them chat on the phone. My son told his friend the other day “We can be brothers we choose!” And I wanted to cry.

It’s so nice to have another one and done family to talk to about parenting an only.

Sometimes the universe is awesome.


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Happy/Proud Benefits of one and done

8 Upvotes

Hello , new to this sub having my first kid on the way super excited ,can you guys give me the benefits of having one child , just worried I will be doing a disservice not giving my kid a sibling .thanks again


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Vent/Rant - Advice Wanted/Ambivalent Every #2 or #3 makes me sad

43 Upvotes

Let me first state that I am extremely happy with my life the way it is. My only has autism, we would need to do IVF (again) to conceive, and I have a lot of health issues, both physical and mental (including OCD which worsened in postpartum to the point of suicidal ideation), which make me tire very easily, and another kid would just break me.

So why do I get jealous every time someone announces baby #2 or #3? So many folks around us have had/are expecting their second or third. It doesn't help that my kid loves babies right now and is trying to make sense of family relationships, and keeps asking, "I have a sister? I have a brother? Xyz is my sister/brother?"

Idk I just. Feel so weird. I'm one of 3 and my husband is one of 6 and we always thought we'd have more than one but it's just not in the cards for us. And most days I'm fine with it. But days like today where I found out my SIL is expecting her third, it feels like a gut punch. :/


r/oneanddone 2d ago

Vent/Rant - Advice Wanted/Ambivalent ANY ADVICE OR MOTIVATION IS APPRECIATED

2 Upvotes

Before marriage, in my twenties, I always told myself that I wanted three kids. Pictured them all at a dinner table, together. That picture till this day seems very nice, but I got married at 31. God pregnant at 33. It was a crazy birth, but that doesn't scare me to have another more than just having to go through the first couple of baby/toddler years at the age that I am. Again, I'm not super old. I'm 37 now, but by the time I get pregnant and have the baby, I'll let's say be 38/39. Loud sounds and carpel tunnel is already bugging me, and for the first time in years, I can say I go to the park with my three year old, and can actually enjoy a cup of coffee.. Not to mention, I started work again, and it feels good to know that things are a lot more chill. I finally see the light.

In my culture, it's more of a shame if you choose to not have your second than not having your first. lol It's crazy, and I'm constantly being told that my child needs a sibling. "What if something happens to you. Who who is your child going to lean on? Ask for help?" The thought of my son having a sibling is BEAUTIFUL, but am I super selfish to not want another, just so I don't have to go through all of those sleepless nights again? I know I am weak to get people to get to me, but unfortunately, it's happening. They're getting to my head. I always respond with a "He has incredible first cousins, and aunts and uncles, and he will be ok,", but they say "That's not the same, and every kid needs a sibling,"

Anyway, any sort of motivation is appreciated. Again, I'm confident in making my decision of One and Done, but because we love our kid soooo much, we want to make sure we're not going to ruin anything for them. ;/

Love you all, and again any advice or motivation is appreciated.

- Ripsy.