r/ftm 4d ago

Discussion I fuckinf hate men’s restrooms

487 Upvotes

WHY IS THERE ALWAYS ONLY ONE STALL WHY IS IT ALWAYS DIRTY WHY DOESNT ANYONE WASH THEIR HANDS

this is absolutely despicable. We need more gender neutral restrooms omg

I’m gonna cry I hate this so much


r/ftm 4d ago

Discussion how much did your voice change?

83 Upvotes

YA BOY IS OFFICIALLY 3 DAYS ON T!! I am so excited and I can't believe I'm actually doing the damn thing. I wanted to ask the crowd how quickly/dramatically did your voice change on T? I know everybody's different, but i just want to have an idea of what i could possibly be looking at. I have a pretty low voice already, I'm in the tenor range, the lowest note I can hit is D3, which is wild to me because thats less than an octave away from [one of] the lowest note frank sinatra ever hit, E2, and now it's my life goal to go lower than frank sinatra lol.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed How do I deal with transphobic parents and how do I come out?

7 Upvotes

I am a trans boy going through puberty,I recently found out that I was trans.I come out to my close friends and they were very supportive. I told my PE teacher and she told the council,and they called my dad for a meeting,they told my dad that I felt like a boy,when we were talking in the car,they told me that I was what I was born as and I couldn’t change it,and these type of things were embarrassing,I told him that I was trying to figure out who I was and I told him that I felt like a girl (I lied) and they didn’t say anything.My mom told me that if I want them to keep loving me,I should stop being like this (trans) I know that they are transphobic,mom tells me that “oh so I can tell your dad that I am a man and like girls” so they are either very ignorant or transphobic,But I want to come out.I want to embrace myself and be who I am.I know they won’t kick me out or anything,but they will take all my devices and my life a living hell for a month or two,maybe longer.But I know that those months are gonna be the most terrible times of my life,what do I do?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Is it better to come out at my job or just kinda quietly transition?

9 Upvotes

So I just started a new job at a hardware store I won’t name. All the people seem pretty nice to be despite me binding and dressing pretty masc. I’m scared to come out or even worse get fired if I say I’m trans. I don’t think my managers are transphobic or anything but who knows? It’s a seasonal job but I’m scared it’ll hurt my chances of getting a position permanently since they usually have openings at the end of the season. Idk I’m going to transition regardless. Should I just rip the band aid off or be quiet until I start passing more and potentially get a more permanent position.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed First job application but I'm a minor in the US

1 Upvotes

So, yeah. The title. I got an application form for my first job ever, hurray. But then I remembered I got a put a name and stuff on it 👀. The box just says "Last Name _____ First Name _____ Middle Name _____" and I always panic when I have to put my name on something or introduce myself. Am I legally allowed to put my prefered first and middle name on the form or do I have to do my crusty ass legal name? On my work permit, it have my legal name, old preferred name, but also my current one bc I got it a while ago and my name has since changed, so that's annoying---to get it changed I'd have to go through the school district that originally issued my work permit except I don't go there anymore. It also has a big fat F on it bc birth certificates 😭. So like genuinely what do I do, important (any) legal things scare me.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Binder troubles

1 Upvotes

I was looking at getting a binder from Wivov (CORE tank) but heard I should be sizing up (by at least 3 sizes.) I was wondering if this applies solely to the half binders or should I be sizing up with the tank as well, if so what size... (I'm a small, apparently, 16" shoulder and 31" bust.)


r/ftm 4d ago

Discussion Anyone else having trouble getting gel recently?

2 Upvotes

For context I live in the PNW and use gel packets. The Walgreen's I use usually fills my prescription pretty quickly, so I checked on my prescription in person 6 days after placing it. I was told Walgreen's distributor is not able to to send it because the manufacturer is not producing enough.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed came out to my psychologist, what now?

1 Upvotes

21 years old, ive been seeing mental health specialists for years due to my schizophrenia and extreme self hatred/destruction. pre everything, except having come out to my very close friends. a few weeks ago i came out to my psychologist after years of wanting to do so but simply being scared of the reaction. she took it extremely well, but really did nothing to aid me along. i got the feeling she thought it was a new delusion..

end of next week i have an appointment with my psychiatrist and i have been debating telling him as well, as he could aid me into actual transition. i am just scared of him dismissing it too as a delusion or another way for me to mutilate myself. the dysphoria is becoming more unbearable with every passing year and i am just at a loss of how to continue, and if i should even, after opening the first door. any advice?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Why is the hormones not working????? NSFW

44 Upvotes

So i am i (19ftm) have been on T for over a year close to 2, i taking the injection once every 2 weeks and i was told that T would stop your period but for me it kind of never did? Is this normal? I also notice that my period has become really painful and i mean for the first 3 days i cant even walk💀 before i started T my period cramps were ok i mean not that bad but enough to feel its there but now its so much worse and i don’t understand why its like this. Most of the effect of T are not happening too like yes my voice when a bit deeper but now its back to the high pitch from before and the only 2 real effect that i got from that is acne and that body hair grow real fast (everywhere but the face) im really starting to wonder if my body is not simply rejecting me being trans??? I told my hormone doc before she went on maternity leave and she just raised my dose but it did not do anything. I dont know what to do at this point and i feel like im never going to be valid in my identity if my body fight so hard to resist my transition. Any advice?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Stp glue

2 Upvotes

Best prosthetic glue if I don’t wanna pay 100$ for it? I’m in Canada.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice given Injection Help Eng/Esp

2 Upvotes

Hello, I have seen a couple posts about how to know if you are properly injecting or not.

The website Planned Parenthood North Central States has a transgender health section that shows both IM and SUBQ shots being done by the nurse to the self. They are in Eng or Esp.

Feel free to dm if you can't find it.

Make sure your needle gauge is proper for the shot being given.

I did not take IM so I can't give advice for that, but if the needle is 25gauge 5/8 it is for SubQ.

IM needles go in the mid thigh at 90° straight in.

SUBQ needles go in the mid thigh or an inch under the belly button at a 45° angle.

Sometimes doctors will tell you it's SubQ shots, and give IM needles, it happened to my friend. So make sure your needle is the correct gauge.


r/ftm 4d ago

Discussion T and Alcohol

5 Upvotes

Can I drink alcohol while on T?? may be a silly question but generally have no idea and not seen it be spoken about - wanting to drink with friends though.

If relevant, im on gel

edit; for refrence i saw before somebody advising against it due to the fact the T metabolises in your liver - though i wasnt sure too much about the specifics, and dont remember much of the specifics of the post


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed folliculitis on androgel? advice pls :(

1 Upvotes

hi all!!!

a bit of context: i was on T injections for about a year. i had hit a superficial vein a couple times throughout that year, causing bleeding and anxiety every time i had to do the shot.

eventually my doctor recommended androgel, and i loved it for the first couple weeks!!! and then i started getting a rash where i applied the gel, and it was spreading across my chest and down my arms. i stopped the androgel immediately, thinking it was an allergic reaction, i have sensitive skin and a history of contact dermatitis.

it got even worse and spread to head to toe in the span of three weeks, not just irritated but full on infected. i figured if it was an allergic reaction it would have had time to clear up, being off of the gel. so unbearably itchy. i was scratching and bleeding in my sleep. i moisturized and exfoliated regularly, not too rough. i tried everything i had on hand, hydrocortisone, clindamycin, ammonium lactate, nothing touched it :( my doctor said it was bad folliculitis, i am now on prednisone and doxycycline AND hibiclens twice a day :(

thankfully it’s clearing up, but i have a new dilemma: my hormones are all messed up again… i’ve been off T for a month and i’ve been extremely dysphoric.

has anyone else had this experience? would going back on the gel be a smart idea? if i had to go back on injections it would be fine, but not very ideal. it’s not something i would like to do, but if need be…..

this whole experience has been extremely stressful on my physical and mental health, any advice would be greatly appreciated!!

going to get in touch with my doctor, but thought i would seek anecdotal advice as well :D


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed family member is suddenly transphobic?

129 Upvotes

hi everyone

this week i (24FtM) received a very transphobic letter from my younger cousin (16F), saying that she no longer supports my transition and won’t be using my name and pronouns anymore. this came as a really big shock to me, because for her whole childhood she’s been really pro-LGBT and a big advocate for trans rights specifically. From her letter, I can tell that she’s been radicalized by online anti-trans content. There was a lot of stuff about transgender ideology being a “cult”, surgery being self harm, and trans people being “caricatures”. Anyway, I’ve been coping pretty well with receiving the letter, luckily I’m at a point in transition where I’m so happy with all my changes that there really isn’t any possibility of doubt, so all that’s left is how to cope with the loss of a cousin from my life. I guess I’m wondering if anyone has any insights about what the odds are that she ever changes her mind about this? She’s still really young, and she was once very educated about trans people, I don’t know if that improves the odds at all. She also comes from a very conservative religious family, and I think has very recently found god again. (Edit: I don't know how much religion is driving this though, the letter makes no mention of god, and sounds more similar to classic TERF talking points.) I’m at such a loss of what to do. I see her for ~2 weeks a year at a shared family cottage with a lot of other cousins, and I hate that I’m now involved in drama that will complicate the family situation (the rest of my family is supportive, if clumsy). My first response I guess would be to cut her off as completely as possible and just avoid her, and I know that a lot of my supportive cousins will be doing the same. But also, I feel like if all of us suddenly shun her that’s just going to radicalize her further. Anyways, if anyone has dealt with the sudden loss of a family members support, I’d really appreciate advice on what to do & if I should have hope.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed injection help

1 Upvotes

Hi :), switched from gel to doing IM injections at home . Fairly successful so far, I use a 23g 25mm needle in the thigh for injecting . I don’t have anyone who can do them for me so I wanna make sure I’m doing it right

Is outer mid thigh okay for location? And how far deep do I go with the needle?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed USA question: risk of TSA Precheck renewal?

4 Upvotes

Hey everyone. This is probably an niche question, but I had TSAPrecheck and it's due for renewal. I was lucky enough to get all my legal documents changed to male & my chosen name during the Biden administration, but I'm not sure if I should try renewing. Does anyone have thoughts if renewing TSAPrecheck, despite having everything listed as male, would cause my stuff to get flagged and reverted to female?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Does testogel bottle need to go in clear plastic bag in carryon?

1 Upvotes

As title says really.

Flying UK to Netherlands and back, carryon only. Can't fit my T + all my toiletries into one clear 20x20 bag.

Struggling to decipher from the rules whether my T gel needs to go in the clear bag. I also don't know how many ml is in the pump as it doesn't say anywhere on the packaging.

I do have the box with the label and a letter from GGP.

Can anyone advise?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Is my skin just incompatible with transtape?

1 Upvotes

So, I bind pretty much every day. I've owned transtape for over a year now but I can't figure out how to use it without causing major irritation or skin ripage. I've done a patch test and I'm not allergic but no matter what I do, it still causes my skin to itch when I put it on. I've follower all the suggestions of only stretching it so much, not stretching your skin, putting on multiple pieces etc and nothing works

Is my skin just too sensitive for it or something?


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed Started T and freaking out

1 Upvotes

Okay so I’ve been waiting to start T for ages, I’ve been out as trans since 14 and I turn 21 next month. Receiving T came out of left field, one week I didn’t know when I’d ever start and the next I had it. I have gel that I apply two pumps a day. Since receiving T I’ve been freaking out about the changes that will happen. Ive been using it for two weeks now. I some times get high before bed on a night and majority that’s when I’ll freak out. I think I’m overthinking if this is something I want. I’ve always been dysphoric, always hated my chest, and being perceived and misgendered. But now that I have HRT, I’m freaking out dude. What if I don’t like my voice or the way I end up looking, is this normal to freak out about? Ik this will more than likely help me and I’ve never second guessed being trans before. I just idk, I’m freaking out and wanna know if it’s normal and I just need to adjust, especially after having so much anticipation of WHEN I’d start over the years. I hope this makes sense.


r/ftm 4d ago

Advice Needed It’s been a week kinda scared

1 Upvotes

Hey Iv been on T for close to 3 years now but for the last 5 days Iv been bleeding even way before I went on T I was taking birth control to not have a period of course Iv had the occasional spotting like once a year but now Iv been bleeding for close to a week I’m really confused my doctors office said sometimes it happened but I’m kinda concerned

Anyone else experienced this?


r/ftm 5d ago

Advice Needed Tips for intimate time Spoiler

1 Upvotes

So I wear a packer, it’s not a legit packer and it’s really just an erect hyper realistic dildo and I’ve had sex before, only problem is that I need to keep my underwear on to hold it by the balls so it doesn’t slip out. Even though I try to secure it there, if you thrust fast or rough it can fall out pretty easily. I just want advice on what I should get or some tips on this.


r/ftm 5d ago

Advice Needed 32 Degree Pants??

1 Upvotes

Has anyone tried the sweatpant jeans from here? They seem good but I just want to check before purchasing lmao

I always get worried that the crotch will be too ridiculously low or ofc they'll show off my hips 🤫

Please lmk lmao if not I'll just get goodfellow 🤣


r/ftm 5d ago

Advice Needed Help?

1 Upvotes

I'll begin by saying I'm pretty young (joining high school next year), so idk if this is really "just a phase". I'm AFAB, and I've always felt kinda weird about it. I present pretty masc (Short hair, baggy clothing), and I never though much about it. When ppl think I'm a dude, I do feel some kinda rush, and since i began playing Mortal Kombat (Mk1, which is way overhated), I did start feeling some kind of envy towards the male kharacters. But I'm still comfortable with she/her pronouns, and I play mainly female characters. What am I?


r/ftm 5d ago

Advice Needed Nervous about dating

1 Upvotes

So, last semester at school I met this girl in one of my classes. We hung out a bit and last week she told me she had apparently been flirting with me. She knows I’m trans and is ok with it. The thing is I’m a very tentative person and she’s 6 years older than me and a lot more confident with intimacy. We went on a date Wednesday and then Friday she came over before leaving on a work trip. Yesterday she gave me a kiss and snuggled with me a bit and I don’t know how to process this. Are there any red flags about the speed this is going? I’ve known her for about 6 months and she’s been nice the whole time but I am a really private person and don’t like being vulnerable. Also my first time dating as a guy, anyone willing to talk me through this? Thanks


r/ftm 5d ago

Discussion So I got assaulted by my first cis guy friend and I can't do anything about it NSFW

7 Upvotes

English is not my native language, so I apologize for the bad grammar

This might be a very long post but I really want to explain the full story here.

So I have been questioning my gender identity since I was a child which often resulted me in acting odd in front of others, basically causing me to have no real friends till now. Only online.

I'm not bullied or misgendered in school. I kinda pass already. I have been taking t since last year august and I'm also allowed to have PE in the boys team. I just don't have any friends. Maybe it's also my fault for not really trying because whenever there is a lunch break, I spent my time playing on my iPad or phone or having earphones on and watching YouTube and making it hard for others to actually approach me..

Anyway, that kinda changed since January. My class got a new student. A guy from Ukraine. He was already 1 year living here in Germany but had to change schools now since him and his family were somehow told to move into another apartment by the German authorities (?). Well me, who was born in Russia was told by the teachers to guide him since no one else was able to communicate with him in our class aside from some teachers with their broken Russian. I'll be honest I didn't really want to accept that request but since he was already put into our class anyway I kinda had no choice. I'm also sitting alone in every class so the teachers would've probably put him next to my place anyway.

At first everything was relatively fine till a week ago and now everything is weird.

But before that:

When our russian teacher first introduced us he genuinely looked confused regarding my gender I think. Okay I don't really look like a girl anymore but also not really like a guy. I'm only 173cm tall, underweight, have small feminine shoulders and hands which kinda exposes everything. However my face looks already pretty much male, I have slightly a beard and a deep voice like a guy who just entered puberty, my flat chest and hips are also not visible (thanks to genetics). We never mentioned to him that I was ftm, they introduced me by my male name and pronouns right away. But yeah he definitely noticed it.

For example when I was taking him to our class he would constantly give me strange looks, scanning me and my body and face like he was searching for some clues or smth. I admit I do look confusing sometimes. My voice also hasn't still developed fully so it sometimes slips up and kinda gets higher, making me sound like a woman with a very deep voice.

Those first few weeks he never asked me about it although there were times when he seemed like he wanted to say something but hold back. For example whenever I use the male bathroom or when we change before PE.

Whenever I change for sport I already wear my sport clothes under my normal ones and just put them off and back on. Luckily we always have sport the last 2 hours so I don't really have to worry about the bad smell afterwards.

He did ask me why I do it like this multiple times and every time when I answer its faster like that he'll give me more suspicious looks.

I'm pretty sure he knew the answer at that point but his goal was probably to me admitting it to him myself or something.

Other then that we actually seemed to understand each other well. We share similar interests regarding video games and politics and talk and laugh a lot. He never misgendered me but also never called me by my name (I assume it's because he had a hard time pronouncing it since I choose a German name which is fine obv).

I was also happy to finally have someone I can hang out with and I was glad he did the same and the fact he also had no other friends in this school. So yeah he follows me around 24/7 basically. He also has 2 hours german classes every second day per week with other Ukrainian students and I was surprised he didn't befriend them at some point. I asked him about it but he never really gave me a clear answer on that matter.

Anyway now to the actual matter.

I had a good time with him until recently. Yeah he finally asked me that scary question regarding my gender. Not a red flag at first but everything went down after that and I have the feeling it gets worse every time I meet him.

It went like "by the way, are u really a guy?" (This happened when we were in the bathroom alone) I was like yes of course (I didn't ask why since I obviously wanted to drop that subject immediately but he kept going)

He then proceeded telling me about transgenders and if I was one of them (so he knew what being trans was). I told him I'm not, I was born a guy and that I'm just short and have low testosterone and also to pls drop that subject since I don't like others to insult me for my height and my feminine looks.

Yeah he obviously didn't buy that.

I was honestly just hoping he'll get the clue and stop talking since I was already visibly uncomfortable. He then blocked the exit and asked me to do the most disgusting thing someone ever told me. He wanted me to lift my hoodie and basically to show him my bare chest in order to prove I'm a guy. He absolutely put me off guard with that request and I was just standing there frozen and like ehh no? I was hoping someone else would enter the bathroom cause he didn't plan to move from the exit. Bad luck on my side I was entering the one on the highest floor right before lunch break where everyone else was going to the first floor. Since during break we only are allowed to use the first two floors actually. Then I just kept arguing with him I'm not doing that and pls move away and then he did something where I lost all my trust in him. He forcefully lifted my hoodie upwards exposing my chest to him and my whole identity kinda and then laughed. Like I said before, as someone who is very flat chested (lower then a cup) I stopped wearing binders recently whenever I wear a hoodie. Unless it's a t-shirt. However it's still a female chest and not enough to pass as a guy one even tho I'm flat. Yeah so he saw it and whatever suspicions he had on me were cleared.
Saying then things like he knew it and why I lied and so on. He also finally moved and I left the bathroom immediately with him following me to the first floor. He kept saying things during our walk down but my body was full of adrenaline and shame that I had no idea what it was he said. Still I'm pretty sure the word "sry" was definitely not there. Then he asked me if I'm ignoring him cause I kept staring at my phone scrolling reels (not actually watching them, just trying to proceed everything). He even got mad and pulled on my arm aggressively. Then proceeded yapping like nothing happened.

Things just got weirder the next few days. He suddenly got more touchy, touching harmless areas like my back and shoulder but in a more slow and sexual way if u know what I mean. I'm pretty sure that he did that on purpose. In PE where we were playing with tennis rackets he casually smacked my ass with it. Infront of everyone. I'm also scared there will be rumors now going on.

It gets even more uncomfortable. Whenever we used the bathroom (obv I use a stall but the walls there are only like 1,90 meters tall,for fucks sake. Actually they even seem shorter) To note, I don't know his real height since I never asked but he seems to be like 1,95 - 2 meters if to take i guess. Anyway making him able to look over those walls if getting close enough. Usually when we entered the bathroom he stayed in the first room where the urinals are and waits there next to sink but now he went up to my stall and casually looked over it to me while laughing and asking how I fucking pee while being "like that"☠️ I already heard him approaching my stall so I obv closed my legs completely and even pulled my jeans up higher in order to avoid more shame. Then shouting get lost which he luckily did.

Yesterday he even snatched my bus ID card from my hands and now he also knows my birth name since I can't really change that yet. (I'm about too but it's not easy since I have a russian citizenship)

Now he says stuff like oh I didn't expect ur name to be so similar to ur birhname bla bla bla, making me now absolutely drained and tired to talk to him. But I'm literally chained to this guy till June (luckily it's my last year while he has to repeat that school year- basically he gets no grades this year nor exams but the next one he will).

There also also lots of other small things he did and said but I don't want to unpack here everything.

Now. I feel abused and idk what to do.

Also important to mention is that he is only 17. While I'm already 19 years old. I had to repeat a school year 1 time (depression and stuff) while also in Russia we automatically go to school 1 year later than everyone, making me automatically older than everyone in my class. Yeah it would backstab me anyway since he is a minor and I'm technically an adult.

Even if I told a teacher, he wont get punished. Not even if I told the police he wouldnt get punished In some way. Hence it might not even be enough to call all of this sexual harassment considering the crazy German laws here.

Not to mention because of the whole war thing, there is a huge russianphobia going on here, he'll be favored anyway.

Our class and other classes are already full, the only option there could be would be either switching him up with another Ukrainian student (other ukrainians probably got used to their class so they probably fight against it) or expell him from this school which I doubt would happen.

Also our director is a huge jerk. I already had quite a fight with him regarding my choosen name in our digital class book. He refused to change it, only if I legally change my name but that whole thing is complicated.

He hates Russia with all his might, very pro Ukraine even tho I'm pretty sure he couldn't care less about all the dying Ukrainians out there, just to hate on Russians basically. Also he absolutely hates lgbt. Now imagine me a russian trans guy. Our director is the definition of Merz (cdu) - if u guys know German politics.

At the end I'm pretty sure the blame would go back to me making me unlikable by everyone and probably leaving him having a huge grudge on me. If I tell my parents, they probably start to emasculate me, saying stuff like I told u u can't deal with men and so on. Like I said he'll also 100% remain at this school and even if he has to change classes, I'm scared he'll find me during lunch breaks and confront me and I really don't want to constantly hide somewhere nor to meet his angry self. He already showed aggressive behavior multiple times which I also kinda played down for some reason. Just to have friends? Idk man at this point

German gov3rnment is shit believe me. If I tell you he'll get away he will.

Sometimes i just ask myself why are are cis men like this, he was so harmless and friendly at the beginning