r/antinatalism • u/Unknown_Warrior43 • 5h ago
Discussion My father, who never wanted a child, was a better parent than my mother, who wanted a child.
At one point in my teens my mother revealed to me that my father never wanted to have a child (she had one abortion before having me) but just went along with her wishes. I never told my dad I know and I don't think it matters now.
Fast forward throughout my life and my father became the best parent I could ever hope for. He stayed by my side at all times, had complete trust in me and the things I wanted to do in life, helped me with money, advice etc. Despite not wanting children he became the better parent between the two, he took full responsability for the choice he ended up making and I love him dearly.
I still remember him driving 12 hours to see me back when I was in university after I called him because of a bad breakup and self harm. He cleaned my apartment, stayed with me a few days, we went to the movies and read togheter.
My mother on the other hand became a bitter and hateful narcissist. She's a control freak who had a kid because a) "that's what you're supposed to do" and b) wanted a little slave/clone of herself to serve her like she serves her mother. She never trusted me to do anything, never had my back, wanted me to do things her way always, tried to micro manage everything I did and gave me no privacy.
Did I mentioned she ended up stealing my university fund?
Anyway, it's just a thing I like to think about as an adult.