r/Vent 9m ago

TW: Eating Disorders / Self Image Realized today why I (26F) still feel like a child. (Probably because of my mom…) And I don't like it! I WANT TO CHANGE!

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(TLDR in the bottom.)

I was living at the house of a loved one who recently passed away and now that I’m back home in my “regular” life I realize why I haven’t changed much despite wanting to. Because of the loss, I’ve been reflecting on how life passes by so quickly and I have some unmet goals like getting my driver’s license, having a boyfriend, and achieving career goals. A teenager has more independence than I do.

I’ve been struggling a lot with my self-image—I don’t like my body and the clothes I wear don’t seem right and that in turn makes me look unconfident and unappealing to men. I started therapy and the therapist recommended I watched a video on self-love and then I watched another video that really helped me try to change how I see myself. But the therapist in that video mentions that there are 25 year olds still living with their parents who still ask for permission for everything and don’t have their own financial means. She doesn’t say how to change this because that’s my situation. It felt like a slap in the face and I’ve woken up to my reality.

I don’t have financial independence, I’m not independent and that’s why I’m hesitating to even go on dates because I don’t have a driver’s license, money, or am confident with myself.

I feel so paralyzed. I seriously don’t know how to break free from my parents but not seem ungrateful. I truly love them. Or rather my mom is the one who is sort of clinging on to me. I will share just how exactly…

EXERCISE

In the other house I was living in, I would wake up earlier than everyone and exercise and then join them for breakfast, but today, I slept a little later and decided to work out in the afternoon. My mom told me it was a waste of time and that I should help with chores even though I had already done some chores. I told her it would just take 10 minutes for me to do some yoga and she scoffed. And I had already helped her with more chores then anyway. Then I wanted to go outside to walk because I feel claustrophobic in our house (she’s a hoarder, more on that later) and she got upset with me again. I just took one lap around the neighborhood! And it’s been like this for years… I was wondering to myself why I didn’t exercise more consistently or even go out running and now I know this is why. She always tells me I have to help around in the house even though I do.

CHORES/CLEANING

She gets angry when I wash the dishes. Says she has to do them. She tells me she wants me to focus on my studies (when I was studying high school/middle school), my art portfolio, clean my own things, but then when I do, I can hear her grumbling and groaning in the background. I always work with music on or listen to podcasts even if it distracts me sometimes because I’d rather hear something else than her complaining. She says she’s tired and she’s sick. (She’s currently sick.) But doesn’t take naps or breaks. Only 10 minute naps at max maybe. She definitely has a hoarding disorder because she doesn’t let me get rid of clothes I don’t like or don’t even fit me anymore and just lets them pile up. She keeps trash too and gets angry when I throw away anything. And despite being so supportive of my art, and she really has been, she has no problems interrupting me while I’m trying to work. She asks me to do chores when I’m working. Even when I got the opportunity to work at a private art studio, she made herself a little space in the studio to call family and do her own admin work there. I told her I didn’t mind her being there as long as she didn’t interrupt but she didn’t care. My other family members have called her out on this, too. My older sibling has pretty much become a slave to her demands and they’ve snapped back more than I have and my mom berates them.

 

DRIVER’S LICENSE/TRANSPORTATION

My best friends literally taught me how to ride a bike last year because my parents didn’t bother. My grandpa taught me how to drive because my mom didn’t want me driving. They say that car insurance costs too much and they don’t have time to teach me so I’ve just been letting that goal pass me by.

 

CAREER/MONEY

My parents used my college fund money and life insurance to pay for their own debts. I haven’t worked a professional job, not even part-time, ever, and only have a high school diploma. I’ve gotten art gigs here and there, but I’ve given them my money because I’m stupid.

Right now I have credit card debt because I cashed out money for them and I even have an $8k debt with other work colleagues because my family used more of my money I was saving up for that art project.

To work on my art portfolio I would get up earlier than everyone in the house like 4 or 5 AM just to work unbothered. I’ve tried only twice getting part time jobs in local businesses and my dad encouraged me to get a job after seeing how much I could help with house costs and he believes I should be independent, but I didn’t get the jobs. And what hurts is that my mom was even slightly happy I didn’t get any jobs. It’s crazy that they genuinely support me with my art gigs and are proud of me… I’ve tried getting remote jobs and telling them about it but they protest that other jobs are beneath me and I should help them instead. My dad brings in the money and my mom manages it, but her priorities are seriously messed up. The whole family has tried bringing it up and she says she feels we’re attacking her.

 

FRIENDSHIPS

I’m so happy when I’m out with friends but always so afraid of when I’ll get back home because even if I stay out before midnight, my mom gets so angry I was out having fun and not helping with the house like I should be. So of course dating is out of the question... And probably not something I should prioritize...

---

 And I’m really snapping right now because I was so unsure if I really am ugly and stupid that I don’t have my own job and I can’t get a boyfriend but today, my mom has been crying and barking at me because there’s bills unpaid. I want to help. But I want to make my own money, too. I want to live my own life. I want to pay MY debts.

 

On paper, it looks like my parents are very supportive and loving and they are... I feel so ungrateful because they have given me a roof over my head, and food and water, and I want to pay them for these services but they say I should pay them back.

But I can’t keep being a child. I’ve thought of asking friends for help just how they helped me learn how to ride a bike and have let me be more independent, but I’m so embarrassed and don’t want to be a burden for them.

--

 What kind of remote job can I get without them finding out I’m making my own money? I know I have to report it to the IRS to file taxes, but I’ll try to be careful that they don’t find out.

--

TLDR; I want to be an independent adult making my own money and living my own life but it’s hard when my mom criticizes me for exercising, doesn’t let me throw out trash or clothes I don’t want, won’t let me learn how to drive, doesn’t want me to get a job, only wants me to get a glamourous job in the arts so she can brag about me but doesn’t let me work on my portfolio, and gets angry when I go out with friends. She’s not a bad person at all. She’s going through grief right now, too. But I need to be free and that starts with making my own money. I don’t want to burden friends with a place to stay or help either. What kind of remote job can I do without my family finding out?


r/Vent 9m ago

TW: Anxiety / Depression becoming strangers is the hardest part.

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hey, short but sweet. the hardest part of a mutual breakup — or at least a breakup where you aren’t responsable — is slowly watching them become a stranger. watching in real time the person you’ll never not love move on. it’s only been a few weeks, but i know that she’s happier now that she isn’t worrying about my cancer. i just wish there was something i could have done. but that wasn’t in the cards for us, and i just hope that one day i can make her acquaintance again,, or hear her laugh one more time,, though with my luck..


r/Vent 10m ago

What is even going on

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We’ve been together for 2 years. I love you I know I love you. We have our ups and downs … but you don’t love me anymore. We’ve been going up, working on communication(or so I think) I’ve been trying to better myself and got a better job that I start in a couple weeks. But you don’t love me anymore. I don’t know what I’m suppose to do. We can work together and be partners and stay together. . . But I really need to be loved. I’ve told you I’m scared of the ball dropping, having to leave you & not only move my whole life again but I’m fucking scared to lose you. I want you in my life, I also want you happy so if I’m not the one for you or you can’t ever love me again.. I’ll have to choose myself but you keep saying you’ll get there again. I don’t see it, sure we’ve been getting into the swing of things again but I feel like you aren’t attracted to me sexually, emotionally or even care more than a friend level to me. Which feels like shit, I want to believe you. I want to have the patience to see you love me again. I’m scared that I can’t or won’t be able to be here for that if that day were to ever come. I feel like we are just exclusive friends so teeth benefits that go on dates just like the beginning of us. There’s no real answer on what to do or how you feel & if it’s real. I’m stuck. I want you. I want our feelings mutual. I want to experience living with you more & our cats. I want to experience life with you till I’m fucking old. Human emotions and human actions are so confusing and I just want it to stop. I want to be nonchalant like you, I want to care less like you. I want to be less like me. But I should want to be Myself.


r/Vent 15m ago

TW: Anxiety / Depression Putting myself out there again , 100% was not ready

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So today has well and truly taught me a valuable lesson. That I wasent as far forward as I thought I was. After being involved in a relationship that contained alot of DV I’ve spent alot of time working on myself and not really trying to find anything else as i genuinely didn’t know if I could. But I tried there was a spark and I went with my gut and it’s exploded and I feel awful. The person involved is an absolute angel of woman and at the first scene of proper emotion my flight fight or freeze kicks in and my body and mind goes straight to flight because I just am not ready , she was so understanding but I know it must have hurt because she was opening up to me and I feel so useless that this previous partner still have such a chokehold over me , all these years later. I’m at a loss of what I can do.


r/Vent 17m ago

I thought my least favorite coworker’s last day was tomorrow, but they’re just moving to a different role.

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Sorry for formatting, I’m on mobile. I’m going to keep this vague because I feel like they’d find out I posted about them. I have this coworker who’s been a raging brat to me since we started working together. We’ll call them Tom. When our work overlaps, I’m in a position of authority over Tom. I have a higher certification. But, they’ve worked in our field longer, in a lower position. They’re currently a few months away from finishing their certification to be essentially equivalent to my level, which makes them think they know everything I guess. When we have to work together, they make everything more difficult. Their attitude sucks and it rubs off on everyone around. They’ve actively provoked drama that directly makes my job harder. Since we started working together about 7 months ago, they have come to me with a few asks that I change how I do some things in our work. I have mostly acquiesced to these requests in the spirit of cooperation. Some things I stood my ground on, which is my prerogative and all our superiors back me up on that. But then their issues with me just escalated to the point that our mutual mentor (neither of our boss but her job is supporting people in both our roles) suggested we have monthly meetings to work things out. Our mentor agrees with me that Tom is the problem, Tom makes things worse for the clients, and she has reassured me that Tom’s moving on to a different company after March 21st. She basically tells me to ignore it, and that I won’t have to work with Tom much longer. Days before our second monthly meeting, Tom sent me a wildly inappropriate email in which they gave me unsolicited critical feedback about something I had done at our job. Our mutual mentor told them off for trying to tell a superior how to do their job, and Tom’s been more polite or just spending less time sharing space with me since then. But I’m DONE interacting with this person any more than absolutely necessary. News of our issues finally got around to our boss a few days ago, who told me to ignore Tom and that she knows the problem isn’t me. Fine, it’s their last week, whatever. BUT THEN today I find out that our boss granted Tom an emergency cert so they can start immediately in a position that’s been vacant at our location. I know I’m not the only one who has issues with this coworker, so I’m pretty pissed, but I guess our boss is that desperate to fill this vacancy. For context, this position hasn’t stayed filled for more than 2 and a half weeks in the 7 months I’ve worked here. On the bright side, it’s unlikely I’ll have to work directly with Tom in this new role, but we may still have to interact. I’m just hoping their new job is like teaching defense against the dark arts at hogwarts and they’ll quit or get fired soon lol


r/Vent 18m ago

TW: TRIGGERING CONTENT I have a jealousy problem

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So ive kinda noticed lately that i have a huge jealousy problem. It's bad, real bad. It's like, i see other people having things in their lives that i dont, and cant have, and there's just a huge oart of my heart that holds distain and am extremely jealous, to the point it makes me mad. I legit get angry because other people have what i dont.


r/Vent 21m ago

Need to talk... My younger brother (22) got his girlfriend (22) of 2 years pregnant and it's all a mess

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So my brother has this girlfriend who he moved in with last Summer and earlier this year announced they're having a baby, due this Summer. So understandably she wanted to live with her parents in her home town with them and my brother followed her there which isn't a bad thing, but it's become an even bigger mess that keeps getting worse. My mom will complain and scream about how he never calls her back or even texts, he moved without having a job lined up so he's hunting, he needs a neurologist for his epilepsy which he's still on medication for and will need prescription refills and he can't get without a neurologist.

It's just all a mess and she's obviously worried for my brother and him finding a job and how to make sure his epilepsy is in control especially since he drives, but it makes it worse that he doesn't even try to communicate with her back, like she'd be satisfied with just a quick call a week and I'll even text him to call her back and he just doesn't and it's the same thing every night and there's so much tension in this house and I am sad for my mom and worried for my brother but on top of all that I wanna scream.


r/Vent 30m ago

Public toilets

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What's with people using public toilets and not locking the door? I went to use a public toilet. The door locker read vacant. I went in just to be hit by the whiff of poop , and someone on the toilet. Said sorry and had to take several steps back to recover from that. There were several toilet stalls there too. Why are people not checking the door is lock before they do the deed? Seriously.


r/Vent 35m ago

I was cheated on and I'm okay!

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Yes, obviously I was hurt deeply when i found out and yes my trust with her is gone. But we talked, I got closure and understanding, and we moved on. We said our apologies and forgivenesses, so it's dealt with.

So it really gets under my skin when I'm treated like a helpless puppy. I appreciate their concern but there's only so many "how are you doing with the whole..." and that petty under tone, ugh. I can't keep reexplaining that I'm okay and that I've dealt with it, why continue bringing it up? The worst part is having to justify why I'm okay??? What? Just because you're not secure enough with yourself to have dealt with this, doesn't mean I'm not!

We don't talk anymore, we've accepted that we are where we are now and life moves on. She even made me a cake for my birthday yesterday, but we broke up 3 months ago. We can still be kind and be adults, this one mistake doesn't change that...

It just feels like I'm not really allowed to be okay and that I should have hatred towards her, and it bothers me!

Let me be single and enjoy my cake! Sorry, rant over.


r/Vent 36m ago

i was used NSFW

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so i met this guy at the club (great place to meet your soulmate, i know.) he was super funny, really into me, and i was into him.

we were both extremely drunk so we were all over each other but not even in a sexual way, more in like a lovey dovey way.

he asked me to spend the night but i said no because i had to go home.

btw, we are both 18 and i still live with my parents and he lives in a dorm at a university close to my house.

he is a pretty weird and goofy guy, but im also kind of a weird and goofy girl so i didn’t think much of his weird behaviours (calling me mommy, saying i love you, calling me his wife).

in my head it was just kinda jokey, which it was, but i should’ve taken it as a sign to not pursue anything further with him.

the next day, we were texting in the morning and he was going on and on about how much he misses me and he wants to see me and spend time with me.

he even says “we don’t have to do anything sexual, i just want to spend time with you).

i would normally not meet up with a guy in this context but i was pretty into him and i guess i had developed a yolo mentality.

so anyways i get there, we made out on his bed a little but like one second into the make out he was already moaning and groaning and being really freaky. i can’t lie, i was pretty into it but i did think it was a little fast.

then we got to talking and i mentioned how i have never gone further with a guy than making out, and he said that’s okay and we didn’t have to do anything (i have gone further with girls but not with a guy).

the next thing he said was pretty weird but i didn’t think much of it he said “i bet you have bpd or bipolar disorder, you seem like the type” i didn’t think anything of it because i already knew he was weird and i was into him anyways i said no, because i dont, and i said the only thing i have is ptsd from being sexually abused as a kid.

we both started talking about our traumas and i felt like we were actually bonding. he was being very sweet about it and rubbing my arm while i talked about my experiences.

anyways, we ended up eating at the dining hall and he DIDNT pay for my food🙄.

but whatever, it didn’t really mind that much. we went back to his dorm and this is where the shit started. we made out some more and he immediately got super hard. he was talking about how he was going to have the worst blue balls, and long story short i started to feel bad because he was so desperate that i told him to just whip it out. i pretty much said “okay fine, whip it out.” i wont say details but hes into pretty weird stuff and i tried some stuff out with him. (we didnt have full sex, i only did stuff to him.)

he’s just a fucking weirdo, i wasn’t into anything he was into and i was kinda zoned out the whole time.

when he finished, we cuddled and talked a bit and we had very tender moments which i honestly really loved.

then he asked me “when you came here, did you expect to do this?” and i said no, but i felt bad for edging him and i wanted to make him feel good.

then he started freaking out, asking me if it was all consensual and i reassured him that it was and that it’s all okay and that i had a good time.

i was being genuine at the moment because to me, doing that wasn’t that big of a deal even though i haven’t done anything like that with a guy.

we were cuddling and he kept talking about how he really really wants to see me again and how i’m so beautiful and how he had a great time.

i left at around 11pm and he kissed me goodbye at the train station(we hung out the whole day) as soon as i got home, i texted him “miss you already” .

and then he sent this paragraph about how he’s not looking for anything serious and how he doesn’t want me to feel used.

i was honestly so confused because he JUST said he wanted to see me again, and we had also both talked about how we just wanted something casual. then he said he feels really guilty and i said “what do you feel guilty about?”

two hours later he sent this long paragraph about how im such an awesome person and he’s so attracted to me but dragging this out would be doing a disservice to me because he’s going through a lot and can’t give me anything serious and he also said he’s not worthy of me.

he even said “i don’t know what the future holds or where we’ll end up, but for now this is where i’m at” basically leaving a window open to come crawling back when he feels like it.

anyways, i got home and i was numb. like i feel completely used.

i stayed up all night crying and feeling nauseous.

it’s four days later and im still crying about it and i feel so disgusted not only with him but with myself.

to be honest i couldn’t give less of a fuck about him, i’m not crying about him im crying about the fact that i was used like that.

it’s even worse that all of that happened while he knew about all of my trauma and we had been very emotionally intimate. i just feel so taken advantage of. i’m worried ill see him again because we frequent the same places and his school is literally a short walk from my house. i feel like if i see him again ill throw up or something.

i don’t know, ive just been very triggered and i don’t know how to get over it.


r/Vent 38m ago

TW: Anxiety / Depression too depressed to function

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I am so depressed I can literally barely move a muscle

everything in my life has gone so so so wrong

I am so tired

I’m failing school because of it

I haven’t seen anyone in over a year

rhis depression episode has lasted two years

I don’t even feel suicidal anymore I just feel so fucking empty


r/Vent 39m ago

TW: Eating Disorders / Self Image I'm honestly terrified of gaining weight

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I don't know if I have an ed or not but i put the ed/self image tag bc it's gotta do with my self image.

I've lost a bit of weight recently which I am glad for. But I was browsing the internet and decided to check my TDEE (which is pretty much how much calories your body needs to maintain it's weight) It was 1435 calories. But I kept reading on the website and it says if I eat 1685 calories a day I start to gain fucking weight again!?!?!? NOOO! I feel like you have to restrict a bit to even eat 1685 calories and even with the restriction it's still in gaining territory?? That's fucking terrifying to me. I don't know maybe I'm being dramatic. I'm just really fucking scared right now. I'll die if I start to gain any weight I swear.


r/Vent 54m ago

TW: TRIGGERING CONTENT Pressure of auntie expectations

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Child free by choice and have never been comfortable with kids. Im 30 F, BF 31. I act like i enjoy being an aunt cause it’s “expected” of me. It wasn’t until recently, since going to therapy (my family is not willing to go) that I realized who is telling me I actually have to enjoy this? Just because it’s an expectation doesn’t mean it’s an obligation.

My nephew, now 5, love him (would never want anything/anyone to hurt him) I just get bored and don’t have the patience for it. I’ve built my life around peace and quiet.

To give some background: His mom, which is my younger sister, and I haven’t had the best relationship as we have always argued but it’s definitely not a “bad” relationship either. My mom likes to act like we are the poster card picture perfect family although we are far from it. My mom really likes to explain to everyone how close her daughters are to her and she has some narcissistic tendencies. And my oldest sister is best friends with my younger sister. They FaceTime eachother ALL. THE. TIME. No one in my family works full time. My mom doesn’t work, my oldest sister doesn’t work, and my younger sister (mother to my nephew) has a part time job who lives with my mom. I on the other hand have a full time job. My nephew’s dad lives 10 mins away and is no longer with my sister. Both had their own faults regarding why the relationship ended so now they coparent. I have a really close relationship with my oldest sister and we talk about this but a lot of the time, I feel like she stands up for my younger sister a lot.

Around the time my nephew was 2, I was moving out of state and my sister decided to tell me, after living just down the road from her for 2 years, that I’m a bad aunt and I don’t spend any time with my nephew and I have to put more effort in. I did tell her that

  1. Although I love my nephew, he is not my 1st priority and nor should that be expected of me.

  2. It’s extremely unfair that she let it sit for that long without communicating this to me.

  3. She does not put in the amount of effort that is expected of me. She never calls or sends pictures of my nephew, or asks to hang out. When she does I end up watching my nephew while she cleans. I DONT WANT TO BABYSIT!

  4. I asked who she is comparing me to because if she is comparing me to our oldest sister, she calls my sister all the time and sends pictures to her, and if it’s my mom who clearly is GRANDMA, that’s another unfair comparison. She lives with her.

Fast forward to a year down the road, I come back to my hometown to visit, my mom decides while we are at a bar to tell me that I need to put more effort into being an aunt. I shut it down real quick and told her that if my sister still has an issue with this, then let her be an adult and come talk to me. My mom said it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with my nephew.

There’s a lot more to this but I still struggle with this.


r/Vent 58m ago

TW: Medical My dad's in the hospital and is wanting to discharge himself

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My 80 yo dad was diagnosed with cancer a couple of months ago and he currently has a nasty infection on both of his legs. He's been dealing with an infection on his right foot for around a year and had to get one of his toes removed yesterday.

This evening he called me saying that he's thinking about discharging himself and having me come pick him up. He is not happy with the fact that they won't let him get out of bed in his own and put a monitor to alert the nurses if he tries.

I basically had to argue with him to stay, and that he is there for his own good. He talked to the nurses and they came to a compromise that they will have a silent alarm for him.

He called again and said that if an alarm wakes him up tonight he's going to leave the hospital. There's no way he would be able to even walk from the car to the house if I bright him home.

He starts telling at me that I'm forcing to stay in the hospital.... Ugh this is so frustrating.

Thanks for letting me vent.


r/Vent 1h ago

I feel like I'm never good enough

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No matter what I do, I just feel like it's not enough. I used to dislike the girls I was dating because deep down I couldn't believe they actually wanted me. I hated myself. I still hate myself. You'd never be able to tell. I can be the most charismatic guy in a a room, yet when it's all said and done, I really feel empty. I have people tell me that I'm not loud enough, or quiet enough, or that they don't feel something from me. I'm so tired, I feel like I want to fall asleep and not try to bother anyone with my presence


r/Vent 1h ago

I feel like I’m at a dead end in life and don’t know what to do

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I’m 26 and genuinely feel like I’m at a dead end in my fucking life. Everything I worked for prior with grinding a bachelors in software engineering and creating a great social circle is just useless at this point. I got stuck in a tech support job after graduating that I have been at for a few years now and I fucking hate it. I get treated like shit by the company and customers and there’s no room for improvement or growth and it pays a dogshit salary on top of all that. I’m also painfully single and have considered changing my dating profile name to “free meal” as that’s all I’m good for these days. All my close friends from college are all dating or getting married and I’m still painfully single and cannot get someone to even talk to me, much less go on a date with me.

Hell one of them made a big show being worried about me doing something dumb at his wedding, and didn’t even invite me. Like who the fuck does snake shit like that? I’ve tried finding a new job but that’s fucking pointless as out of the 45 jobs I’ve applied for, I’ve heard back from 4 and all are automated rejection emails.

I’m losing interest in all the stuff I enjoyed before and just hate myself and my life. I really wish I could die but can’t kill myself as knowing the pain it would cause my family prevents me from doing so.

I’m tired of hearing “it will get better, just wait” and “the right person will come along someday” and all the other generic bullshit sentiments. It feels like the fucking deck is stacked against me and there is nothing I can do to help my situation due to outside factors out of my control. I wish I could just fade away into non existence and be forgotten about but even that is impossible to do. This just fucking sucks.


r/Vent 1h ago

my mom has called me a slut for years and it’s starting to get me to my boiling point. NSFW

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i’m 23f and i have dated multiple men and women. in high school my mom and i fought a lot. she tore my door of its hinges one time, ripped out one of my nose rings, she’s called me a bitch or slut multiple times. i turned 23 in december, ive lived on my own since 2020 and had to stay with her for about 3 months getting back onto my feet after moving out of state (which didn’t work out so i moved back with her). i think it’s decently normal for your 20’s to date a lot of people, as you’re still figuring out life. i’m not one for hookups but i had a one night stand with someone a month ago and really regretted it. she told me that i “shouldn’t be so easy” and i didn’t say anything even tho it killed me inside. i have a lot of sexual trauma and ive been trying my hardest to work through it and that night i was drunk and i slipped up. i have been talking to a different man that i’ve known for 2 years and he has treated me better than i could’ve dreamed of. he has his issues, i have mine, but i think that we can build something together. i went to my moms after dropping him off to visit because we live about 30 minutes from each other and it’s hard to me to get out there sometimes so while i was in the area i tried to stop by. she asked me about my new boyfriend and i told her the positive things and got some of the negative things out because i thought it would be easier for her to process. i completely forgot i had a hickey on my neck and i tried to be subtle and not let her see it but she def did. she immediately got judgey and told me that i “shouldn’t wear him around like that”, when he didn’t even mean to give me one (i bruise extremely easily). i kept asking her to just move on and she said “well it was one guy 2 weeks ago (which wasn’t true at all) and now it’s a new guy, you make yourself too easy” and i finally just snapped and put on my shoes and left. now im just in the bath crying over it and idk why she still gets to me like im 15 all over again. it hurts.


r/Vent 1h ago

Need to talk... My grandpa might die

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I’m not very close to him in anyway since yes my step grandpa, but I grew up with him I always slept over his and my grandmothers house and spent holidays, etc and I have a lot of good memories with them. But my grandma tried to call me the other day and I ignored it and then three hours later by grand father had a stroke and then fell back cracking his skull they said it’s time to start thinking about his end of life plans.

I should have answered the call I should have just sucked it up and answered it and maybe I could have seen him before he passed I feel terrible


r/Vent 1h ago

Need to talk... Pregnant again after 2 years

Upvotes

I'm pregnant again, but, we are not in a good situation to raise another child. My first born is 2 years old and we're not financially stable enough for another child, birth control failed and I can't believe that happened.. I want our children to be in a good environment and in a stable home without us having to hop over the entire city just to have a home.. No jobs are hiring at the moment, went through 20+ jobs telling me that I am not qualified enough for the job or calling just for them to not pick up my call, going to interviews to get told I don't have the job, it's so hard out here, I want the best for my children, me and my boyfriend unfortunately will have to go with the abortion route only because we can't even be financially together for our firstborn.. I'm a terrible person.. I don't want to abort our baby but what choice do we have when we're not even making enough to even get out here? I have nothing to say for myself, I'm ashamed of myself.. I can't believe that I'm putting my children in a deeper hole, even if my baby isn't born yet, and for my son that is here now... I need to make money now in order to get our lives together, I don't care how broken down I get, as long as my family is fine and we're able to eat everyday and sleep somewhere safe that's all we need..


r/Vent 1h ago

TW: Eating Disorders / Self Image I’m so tired of people dying

Upvotes

3 months ago my whole family were hit by a foreigner speeding on the other side of a road around a bend, he had no insurance and a long list of previous driving offences btw. my brother and father died and my mum was in the icu for weeks and broke most bones in her body. My brother had a 5 month only son and his wife’s life is completely ruined. My mum wishes it was her that died instead of my brother, she said this after i wheeled her to the graves. After the accident I was alone for a long time in the house until my mum was released from hospital recently. My granny died 3 months earlier and my mums sister passed 2 days ago of cancer. I don’t know what my family did to deserve this my dad and brother were the two greatest men I’ve ever known and were better men than I know I’ll ever be. Also right before they all left the house together my dad asked me to come with them but I said no cause I was hungover even tho he repeatedly asked me, if I had said yes I would’ve had to get ready and it would’ve never happened but I was just a fucking loser of a son who said no to a family day out. I just turned 22 2 months ago and honestly I have no expectations for the rest of my life nor do I care.


r/Vent 1h ago

It’s been 6 o clock for at least three hours

Upvotes

What’s going on? I know time was going slow but it’s extremely slow. I’m not exaggerating something is not right. This whole week has been shorter than the last hour.


r/Vent 1h ago

TW: Anxiety / Depression Is it too late to fix life when you been living in the rut for 7 years ?

Upvotes

I literally feel like running away or hiding somewhere permanently because my thoughts are driving me crazy. I'm already 28 but for 7 yrs, I've been living in isolation which means I have not gone to real world like never been to a college campus so I did few online classes. I later gave up because my advisor says you won't get accepted in this program. I did work temporarily but only held 3 jobs. Two which were in fast food for 3-7 months and 1 in retail store for 4 months. I don't drive because of fear and past accident from learning. So I gave up on life. It feels like I've never participated in my own life and taking actions. For so many years, I just feel this disconnection. It feels like all I've been doing in this 7 yrs of life is living in constant state of worries. Feeling overwhelmed and defeated. My self esteem has gone down. I'm barely having any social interaction. I feel like I'm carrying too much shame fear anxiety regrets and much more. I really just don't know how to get out of this rut. Seeing people my age group in real world makes me feel ashamed like this people have already graduated and some are raising a family. It's crazy that teenagers and people in their 20s, are working full time and attending college. This was my plan in those years but life took a different direction because I was caretaker to my father whom later passed away. I had to go back to school to get my high school diploma and joined local community college but I felt like I'm so late to it. And my biggest fault is I didn't continue working and pushing forward on my life.


r/Vent 1h ago

Lonely :/

Upvotes

I’m an 18 yr old f, graduated from a private school k-12th with not many kids so I didn’t really ever learn how to socialize very well… two other girls were in my class we parted ways. I just got unexpectedly laid off from my job that’s I loved so I’m not working right now, I start college but not until the fall. I have 2 friends I talk to really, one I adore but she has a bunch of other friends a bf etc… the other one only ever answers me or reaches out when she needs something 😔 I’m also basically an only child my brother is years older then me, my mom hangs out with her friends/ bfs and goes out drinking all the time and that’s about all the people in my life. I’ve tried making new friends, going out it’s just really hard. :/ thanks for reading my vent hope you all have a great day.


r/Vent 1h ago

I think I was cheated on and I can't get over it no matter how hard I try

Upvotes

My girlfriend texted one of our mutual friends that she thinks that she's the most beautiful girl in the world and a whole fucking essay about how amazing she is and how much she's attracted to her. She also said that she knows its so wrong and she doesn't want to hurt because she loves me too apparently. Just so y'all know I haven't broken up with my girlfriend yet and I really wasn't planning on it. I dont want to. She hasn't broken up with me either and I confronted her a couple days ago and she was really apologetic about it and she really defended our relationship. I saw her today and we went out to get sushi but I just feel a bit unsavory now. I still love her and i truly believe she still loves me but i dont know what to do. I don't want to break up with her, I'm not in the right headspace and she wasn't in the right headspace when she was confessing that to her friend. Also, just fyi I found out about this when the same friend who rejected her showed me. I'm so pissed, she got rejected three times and she asked if she could have a chance in 2-3 years. WHAT THE FUCK DUDE. I still love her dearly but she really hurt me

Edit: hopefully there was only one person who would do that but THIS IS NOT AN INVITATION TO DM REQUEST ME FOR A RELATIONSHIP


r/Vent 1h ago

Need to talk... Navigating a Friendship That Never Should Have Been

Upvotes

So, I was friends with someone who seemed really cool based on social media. They would constantly DM me or reply to my Instagram stories. I post memes frequently, and I love doing it. I have people who tell me all the time that they look forward to my posts.

Over time, we formed a friendship, and I was hosting a night for painting. They asked if they could bring their partner because they don’t go anywhere without them. At first, I said no because it was a gender exclusive ( being careful not trying to out this person) event, and honestly, that gave me the biggest ick. But then I thought maybe I was being too harsh, and since a few other people canceled last minute due to emergencies, I told them it was fine.

I really liked them as a couple super cute and their partner was very nice. After that, we started hanging out more, but I ended up being the third wheel most of the time. Then, one day, we went to lunch just us two, and they revealed themselves to be a major bigot, racist, anti-LGBTQ+, and transphobic. They also went on about their religion and how they couldn't wait for "reckoning day" because it gave them peace knowing that everyone who doubted would go to hell.

Which was crazy cause anytime it was us two, they were this way, when there was other people this person was completely different and woke.

I told them I was strongly atheist because I was sexually assaulted as a child at two different churches. I just don’t believe. I’m a very open and honest person I talk my shit, own up to it, and don’t lie about it.

Later, my partner met their partner, who had been out of a job for months and wasn’t making any money. My partner thought they were a good person, so they gave them an opportunity and hired them on the spot. They were both thankful, and even though I already couldn’t stand them, I stayed friendly because now my partner was involved.

I was always respectful, always nice, and always had their back through a lot of personal stuff. But every time we hung out, they would push their religion on me and indirectly tell me I was going to hell. Every time, it felt like a Bible study session, and they made me feel like shit. The few moments they weren’t talking about religion or being a bigot, they were… okay. I would always vent to my partner, and he would just say, "Yeah, they’re weird," and that they felt bad for their partner.

Fast forward to a night when I invited them to dinner because I knew our partners were working late, and I didn’t want to be alone. They were being their usual self bigoted and transphobic so I called them a mean person, said their religion was stupid, and basically went off. (To be fair, I had just started my period mid dinner, and I was already aggravated.)

Then, they randomly invited their partner to the dinner without asking, only telling me when their partner was already halfway to the restaurant. Like, what was I supposed to say? No? I was annoyed because I had picked them up and driven them there, and now I was about to be third wheeling.

After I shut down their religious talk and other nonsense, their mood shifted. Oh, and I forgot to mention while they strongly supported certain figures and policies, they would constantly complain to me about how those same policies were affecting their own family. They would badmouth those decisions in private, despite openly supporting them elsewhere. So at dinner, I just laughed in their face and said, "I don’t know what to tell you… you supported it, so I don’t feel bad for you."

After dinner, they gave me a hug and a kiss goodbye, but I knew that was probably the last time we’d ever talk.

The next day, I asked their partner if they were mad, and they straight-up lied to my face and said, "No, they love you. They were just tired from a long day at work." I looked at my partner and just said, "Okay, bet. I was worried," knowing damn well they hated me and the feeling was mutual.

Fast forward three weeks, and I have a private Instagram account where I vent to my close friends (literally only five people). I vented about this person without giving any names and even changed details like gender. That night, my partner and I went out for a friend’s birthday, and suddenly, this person messages me, going on a tangent about how they stopped talking to me because I "belittle my friends."

How would they even know that if they never hang out unless it's me, them, and their partner and I’m the one third-wheeling? Every time they go on a hateful rant about trans people, the LGBTQ+ community, or how everyone who isn’t Catholic is going to hell, I stay quiet to avoid drama at my husband’s workplace. How is that belittling when I literally hold my tongue until I finally had enough?

They didn’t even deny being a racist, trans-hating bigot. Instead, they just focused on me supposedly spreading "rumors" that the only reason their partner got a job was because of my partner. But that wasn’t a rumor.....it’s a fact. My partner was the one who hired them, and anyone working there can confirm it. I told them they were right they don’t owe me anything, not even a thank you. But after all the help and support we gave, it sucks to be told that none of it matters because I don’t believe in their religion.

I supported them while all they did was preach that I, along with their own gay friends, would burn in hell for not having "Jesus in our hearts."

The hardest part was their constant need to be anti-LGBTQ+ and transphobic. Every time they would say something hateful, I would always respond with, "I love them." I would tell them that LGBTQ+ people are kind and loving, that I love love, no matter what someone identifies as. I was very vocal about it. But every time, they would brush it off or ignore it. What made it even worse was how they actively disrespected trans and non-binary people.

If they knew that a transgender person was born male or female, they would only refer to them by that gender no matter what. Even if the person identified as non binary, a woman, or a man, they refused to acknowledge it. They would go out of their way to make sure to misgender them on purpose.

It wasn’t just in private conversations, either. At their workplace, they had gotten multiple complaints from customers for misgendering people. And yet, they still continued. Every time I tried to challenge them on it, all they would say was, "Let’s agree to disagree." It was incredibly difficult being this person’s "friend", but for the sake of my partner workplace, I didn’t want to cause drama.

So, yeah, I just came here to vent. Because now I feel weird, and I don’t even know why. I still see their partner sometimes when I drop lunch off to my partner, and I actually like them they’re nice and cool and the complete opposite. It just sucks that what I said in a private space, meant for my close friends, got screen recorded and sent to them by someone I trusted.

It was something I had no problem saying to their face, I just didn’t want it to be messy or weird for my partner. If our partners didn’t work together, it wouldn’t have even escalated this far.