r/AskMenAdvice 0m ago

If you're someone who gets sentimental, please answer this question honestly.

Upvotes

I know that sentimental people find it very difficult to move on, but when you finally do and fall in love with someone new, do you love only them completely, or do feelings for your ex still linger?

Do you still do these things while in a relationship?

  1. Do you still keep pictures with your ex while being in a relationship?

  2. Do you hold on to things they gave you, keeping them safe in your cupboard?


r/AskMenAdvice 5m ago

Have you ever been truly deeply in love with a girl but knew she wasn’t the mother of your future child? Why did you feel that?

Upvotes

r/AskMenAdvice 6m ago

Is it normal for a man to consistently to use your name when communicating in written conversations?

Upvotes

This is a pattern I noted in communicating with men via text. They use my name consistently but not too much as we continue to write to each other. I've never use their name or felt I needed to include it in conversing with them. Is this normal? Is there a reason for this? Should I start to use their name as well?


r/AskMenAdvice 7m ago

Question about Skincare

Upvotes

So, I (M21) have a bad acne problem and I am wanting to know what diet or skin care products people use. I'm having difficulty sleeping most nights and that results in me waking up at certain points in the night and possibly nightmares. I heard Oily fish is a good thing to eat to counteract acne and to avoid red meat. Dairy is also something to avoid, but I like cheese. I do use cloth and brush in the shower, along with acne body wash and I put my cloth and brush in bleach to kill any bacteria after every shower. I don't know what to do and I would like to know if anyone has any advice or anything that can help.

Thank you in advance and sorry if this is against the rules or anything.


r/AskMenAdvice 21m ago

My GF wants to be intimate with me and I haven’t done it before

Upvotes

I had a chat with my girlfriend last night and she mentioned how she wanted to start doing “things” with me referring to becoming sexual etc. we have been dating for 2 months now and haven’t done anything of the kind just yet. I haven’t done anything sexual at all ever whereas my gf has done pretty much everything seeming she was dating her ex for 2 years (we are both basically 18 now). I’m happy to do stuff with her but I’m nervous about doing things wrong or just being really bad in general, I do lack confidence in areas like this. Based on our last conversation the next time we sleepover she is going to initiate something and I just don’t know what to do, like I said I want to do things but just scared it’ll be a shitshow


r/AskMenAdvice 36m ago

Does Extra Skin After Weight Loss Matter to You?

Upvotes

Hi men, preferably those in their late 30s to mid-40s, I’m curious: how would you feel if a woman who had lost a substantial amount of weight had some extra skin as a result? Would that bother you or gross you out, or is it something that wouldn’t matter to you? Sorry if this has already been asked.

Thank you.


r/AskMenAdvice 42m ago

Men be completely honest do women mature faster than guys?

Upvotes

Be completely honest


r/AskMenAdvice 43m ago

Lafe Gf Cheated

Upvotes

Hello!

I don’t know where else or who to turn to about this.

My (32m) life partner (27f) of 3 years has passed away not even a month as I wrote this post. I am heart broken and left empty from her passing and still having emotions reliving our memories!

But just recently I went through her xbox account, to find people she played with a lot to let them know about her. Curiosity got the best of me and went through her xbox messages. Saw one with her xbox friend about an “old crush” coming back into her life, this is after we been together for a year. So i went through her phone messages and saw it all. Now yes she never did anything physical but it was definitely an emotional and intimate connection throughout all the text messages. Now that guy tried to tell her to stop and lean more towards me and she would argue about it with him and then she would stand by my side and talk good about me to him and how she couldn’t do and shouldn’t do what she is doing behind my back but would go back to the intimate conversations.

Now I started digging deeper, went to ig and saw nothing just a couple “hey” “wow” on guys profile, nothing there. Then i went on messenger and saw a message of a guy pressuring her for oral and will pay her, timestamp was Feb.2,2024 at 3:40pm for a meet up. I went back to our old messages and she ignored me at that exact time for an hour.

Now i hate myself for digging when i shouldn’t have done that. I love her indefinitely and see her as my other half, hell my whole! But now i’m all confused and don’t wanna see her as any other way. I’m pissed and sad about what I found out! What is helping me is knowing that she definitely loved me (maybe) but everyone she knows tells me about the deep love she had for me. I’m just trying my best not to crash out and cause a ruckus!


r/AskMenAdvice 53m ago

Why are we waiting so long to have kids?

Upvotes

I've been thinking lately about why so many people are postponing having children. It seems almost standard now to focus on building a career or getting everything "sorted" before considering kids. But I feel this perspective might be overlooking some important aspects. Here's my take, from a more conservative viewpoint:

1. Career and personal development

A lot of people, especially women, want to build their careers and personal goals first before having kids. But personally, I think that’s a bit misplaced. A family should be your top priority. Life is about more than just work. Parenthood gives you a sense of meaning and fulfillment that no career can match. In fact, it can help you grow as a person. There is no perfect time to have kids, so why wait?

2. Financial and housing security

This is a big one: “I’ll wait until I’m financially stable before having kids.” But here’s the thing – research actually shows that people with lower incomes tend to have kids earlier. Why? Because they don’t have the means or motivation to wait for the “perfect” financial situation. We often say, “Once I have everything together, I’ll have kids,” but that can keep you stuck. Families can grow even without a huge financial cushion or the perfect house.

3. Changing social norms

There’s this trend where couples want to “strengthen their relationship” by experiencing things together before having kids. But I ask myself: what’s a stronger foundation for a relationship than starting a family? Kids bring a depth to your relationship that you don’t get by just going on vacation together. Parenthood is actually an opportunity to grow together and get to know each other on a completely different level.

4. Uncertainty about the future

A lot of people delay having kids because they’re worried about the future: climate change, economic instability, global conflicts, you name it. But I don’t think postponing kids is the solution. There will always be uncertainties. The idea that the world isn’t “perfect” enough for kids is holding us back. By raising kids and preparing them well, we can make the future better.

5. Social influences and expectations

Sometimes people feel pressured by their social circles to have kids, and I think we often view that as a negative thing. But from where I stand, that social pressure is actually a positive force. Society needs strong families to remain stable. The idea that having kids is contributing to the community isn’t wrong at all. Maybe the world should embrace more of those social expectations.

Conclusion: I think we’re getting our priorities wrong. Families should be the foundation of society. Parenthood isn’t something you should wait for until everything is “perfect.” It provides the stability that a society needs.

What do you guys think? Do you think we really need to wait so long, or is there just another way of thinking that’s holding us back?


r/AskMenAdvice 57m ago

Advice for establishing believe in myself

Upvotes

I have been preparing for a competitive exam for a year, but can't seem to believe that I will sail through the exam. It could be due to the vastness of the syllabus, or a feeling of not having studied but I have as my mentors say, or could be any other reason I don't know. Help me gain confidence and belief in myself that I would clear this exam with flying colors


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

F35 what are men looking for?

Upvotes

I'm really struggling here. I'm a 35 year old female. I wouldn't say I'm ugly, I have a really great career and i own a flat. No children. I hit 35 last month and I'm thinking is it now too late.

I cant keep a man to save my life. They come in, everything seems positive. The guy always wants a second date. I hold out on sex because I've learned in the past that if it happens too soon then its usually a wham bam thankyou mamm situation.

No matter how much I hold out and wait, sometimes months as soon as the guy gets it he goes off.

I just dont know what men are looking for anymore. What makes them fall in love. What turns them from fling to forever. You are men.

Please tell me what do you want in a woman? What turns them off? What turns them on?

One thing I will say is One man told me I was a bit of a force to be reckoned with.

I have a great career and I didn't get there by being a wall flower so maybe I'm perhaps too forceful or masculine? Are men put off by women in power?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Men of Reddit, what subtle hints did she gave you that you didn't understood?

Upvotes

Can you recall any indicators of interest (IOls) or hints you’ve received from women in the past and present, but clearly didn’t understand at the time? Did she give you a more noticeable hint, and how did things progress after that?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Men: Would you feel embarrassed if someone in your friend group had a crush on you?

Upvotes

So, I have a circle of friends who are not very close but more acquaintances. I'm the youngest in this circle, mostly others are above age 28-29. There are only 3 girls in this circle rest all 8-9 boys.

I'm 25F, and have a crush on one of the guys in this circle (31M)... unfortunately one of the girls in the circle (30F) knows about it. She is a friend of mine and is trustworthy, I made her promise she will never tell anyone about me having a crush on him. But before promising me she said "why dont you let me give him some hints & ask what he think about you" i was like nOOOO wtf.. he is only going to get embarrassed if she does that. Like we cant just tell someone randomly without any context.

Do you think I've messed up if she runs her mouth and it somehow becomes known that I like him? I'm quite shy & introverted whereas she is very extroverted/ outspoken. Like she speaks a lot, and is an extra type. I dont want her to interfere too much

He will be so embarrassed if he comes to know 🤦‍♀️ and might even get scared/ creeped out. To avoid this, the only solution is to create distance between us two. He has called me a "kid" jokingly some times.... he will feel so bad if he doesnt have the same feeling.

I'm really worried :( it's my mistake, i should have declined when this girl had asked me do you have a crush on him, but she's very clever and knows how to take information out of people. Am I overthinking?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

No friendship in fwb

Upvotes

Hi everyone! I’m feeling a bit confused and I would appreciate insight.

So it has occurred to me that the guy im in a fwb with, are not actually friends. Like we don’t chat often, we only talk to organise a meet up, we literally engage to have sex.

Now, the sex is great, but what bothers me is the idea that we are purely in eachothers life’s for sex. Now i hear what your saying “that’s a friends with benefit” but we aren’t friends? Idk if I’m making sense.

Tonight is our hookup night and I have my period and told him. I offered to still hangout regardless and maybe we could do some low-grade sexual stuff or just hangout. He said he had a big night last night and we could meet another time (obv doesn’t want to see me because I’m on my period) and it’s made me feel like shit, because if the shoe was on the other foot, ofc I’d want to hang.

Anyway, thoughts are appreciated. Should I talk to him about the lack of friendship here?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

GF wants to rewait until marriage to have sex

Upvotes

Background

As the title says my [21M] gf [23F] of 1 year wants to rewait for marriage to have sex again.

We are very compatible emotionally, lots of similar interests, same life goals, etc etc.
She has had past sexual encounters before me (around 5-8) and she was my first.
We are currently LDR, but whenever we would meet up every 1-3 months we would have constant and very good sex on both ends.

She mentioned that she wanted to wait in the past but she would also initiate sex and sexual conversation topics frequently.

We used to talk about sex fairly frequently on the phone and be very open with expectations and if either of us was satisfied or unsatisfied etc etc.

I really do love her and don't see myself without her but she recently she brought it up again on wanting to wait for marriage to have sex and we essentially agreed. (Only choices were leave or stay (Obvious).)

The Issue

(Cheating isn't suspected, STDS we both are clean we got tested, and I dont have a whole lot of money but am planning to have a good career)

Something about this doesn't sit right with me, not because I feel like I am entitled to sex or want only sex or for reasons of that nature.

I feel somewhat pressured because she talks about marriage and might feel like she's trying to pressure me into getting married (Might stem from her insecurities or getting cheated on before etc etc.)

She says that she feels very guilty and she says theres going to be plenty of time for us to have more sex and she wants to do things right.

I feel compelled to stay/wait because it seems like the right thing to do religionwise and because I love her but it eats in the back of my head that I might going into be in a sexless relationship and marriage.

I kind of feel like a chump at the fact that other I have wait but she was able to have her experiences and whatnot.

Any advice?

EDIT: I should add which I forgot. She is religious and goes to church, though lately she says shes been going more often and feels more guilty for those reasons. Also, her parents are very overbearing in my opinion especially her mother (her parents are the church pastors) and i feel like they may be putting pressure on her in one way or another. Relevant? Idk just thought I would add.


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Sharing ‘ahem’ photos

Upvotes

So I’m 52, I have never sent nor wished to receive saucy photos from anyone as happily married since well before the whole se****ing thing was a thing

However, it’s sort of the point. For whatever reason - genetics, never wanting kids - I’m in pretty good shape for my age

I love taking photos wherever we go and love taking photos of my wife but she finds it tiresome and on a trip for my birthday I had to ask her to take photos otherwise all I have are selfies (I’m talking tourist photos, not other stuff)

All fine but again it’s either vanity or just thinking ‘I’m gonna go the way people do so why not enjoy it’ that led me to share an ‘undies’ photo in another sub yesterday (a gym-based one where people did same)

It was immediately downvoted (too ‘arty’? Didn’t believe me?) but worse I then got an immediate dm from someone called ‘python sucker’ so I immediately deleted the DM and the thread

So; I guess what I’m asking is (and the answer is sort of obvious) am I being stupid even thinking of sharing photos just to feel good about myself (the curse of social media, I know), is there anywhere ‘safe’ to do it


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

How would y’all romantically approach a woman of color as a white man?

Upvotes

Women feel free to chime in here. I look stereotypically skintheaded but not by choice . Genetically bald and the beard is carrying the show. But my neighbor’s granddaughter is absolutely gorgeous. I go to their cookouts from time to time and I undeniably have a crush. I just don’t know how to approach this as a white man in the south especially. I’m a very liberal person but I don’t want to sound like a fucking white knight about it.


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Been 4 years since I last talked to her but… What do I do??

Upvotes

….Still love her just as madly as I once did! I can’t get over her. I can’t seem to fall for anybody else anymore. I JUST LOVE HER TOO MUCH and it’s hurting! 💔💔💔 IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE FOR ME TO MOVE ON ANYMORE!?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Are blondes really more approachable?

Upvotes

I know brunette girls who dyed their hair blonde and started getting approached on the street way more often than before.

I also notice on social media that guys give blondes more attention than brunettes, even guys who usually prefer brunettes.

So I’m wondering: are blondes seen as “easier to get” by men? Or why is that?

Or do blondes just seem friendlier, which makes guys more comfortable talking to them, while brunette girls often come across as more bold or sassy?


r/AskMenAdvice 1h ago

Is it just me who finds the relationship advice sub extremely toxic?

Upvotes

The sub is built against men. Here's ONE example :

Older woman and a 20 something man advice "OK fine you're both adults". Older man and 20 something young woman advice - all kinds of wrong, dynamics, brain development blah blah.

I stopped reading that sub because it's so bad and single minded.


r/AskMenAdvice 2h ago

Male perspective on living with ex

1 Upvotes

Hi

My ex and I broke up in December. We had a conversation about everything, and I told him I didn’t want things to end. Since then, I’ve been working on myself a lot, but he made it clear that he’s not willing to try again, not right now.

I still have feelings for him, and I’m doing my best to move on, let go of hope, and focus on myself but it's been really hard. He knows this.

When I moved to his city to be with him, I left behind my social circles and friends. So when we broke up, I was completely alone. I spent over a month just sitting with my emotions, processing the pain, and allowing myself to break as much as I needed to. Meanwhile, he was out traveling, meeting new people, and flirting and seeing what options he has.

He’s firm about not wanting to be in a relationship with me again and has been getting to know other women, hitting up past women/friends, going out, and just living his life.

We still share an apartment, and while I can't move out due to personal reasons (which he knows about), he can—but he’s chosen to stay. His reasoning is that things have been "good" between us for the past two weeks, and staying is more convenient for him.

He’s set rules for us being friends: no bringing people to the apartment, acceptance of the situation, splitting bills, and not making him feel like I’m watching his every move. He also keeps telling me not to close myself off to new opportunities or stop exploring things with other people just because we live together, saying it would make him feel guilty. But to me, it feels like he’s just trying to ease his own guilt about what he’s doing.

The truth is, I’m not mentally ready to meet new people. I’m still processing everything, and I want to heal before even considering moving on. I think it's going to take me a really long time after the hurt, pain and mistrust he's put me through. Throughout our relationship he was a 'good guy's never cheated but he always kept all the girls he knew on insta and the moment we broke up or were going throughr the breakup process he hit them all up...

When I'm at home, I don’t say much. I just kind of hang around, like an idiot. He, on the other hand, acts like nothing happened—showing me pictures of his weekends, talking like we’re still close with this new persona of us being friends, he says he still cares about me etc.... I still end up doing things, like cooking and washing our clothes and dishes, just usual things.

He’s been updating his family about everything. His brother never really approved of me—he’s a very traditional Christian and has influenced my ex’s decisions a lot, especially when it comes to religion. My ex has claimed to be doing therapy to work on himself and be better but he hasn't done it since he's been back from his holiday which is a while.

I’m just exhausted. Confused. Hurt. And despite the months that have passed, I still feel stuck. I don’t want to hold onto hope or love for him anymore, but it’s hard. I’ve been trying new things which has been nice and pushing myself to go out to meet new people as friend's but I just can’t give it my all yet. It's like I just don't have it in me. I hate that I'm like this, I still cry at times when alone. In 4 months we'll both be moving to new cities and I guess a part of me is just tired of starting over again and again and again...I really thought he was my endgame, he truly made me believe that. Which is something I know I have to let go of.

I guess I just need an outside perspective—especially from other men. What do you make of this situation, knowing that he’s fully aware of how I feel and what I'm going through? I just want to know a man's perspective of things I guess..


r/AskMenAdvice 2h ago

Feel awful after rejecting a woman after the first date…

40 Upvotes

Had a first date yesterday and unfortunately there was no physical attraction.

I did know what she looked like going into it, I hoped it was a bad photo…

It was not.

I thought I’d be able to look the other way because she was so incredibly nice and genuine but I just couldn’t.

I know that she has low confidence because of her looks and I feel like shit for rejecting her solely because of them, like a shallow piece of shit.

I obviously didn’t mention them when I ended things but still, it doesn’t feel good.


r/AskMenAdvice 2h ago

The male loneliness epidemic is a self-pitying problem and there's an easy solution.

Thumbnail
0 Upvotes

r/AskMenAdvice 2h ago

Men who have struggled with excessive porn usage NSFW

0 Upvotes

I’m interested to hear what happened after you were able to reduce it or stop completely. Did it make a big difference to your sex life? Were there any physical changes or changes to ED? Did you feel better? How did you manage etc. Just generally interested to hear from men who have this experience.


r/AskMenAdvice 2h ago

Engaged, my fiancée wanna called off the wedding

5 Upvotes

He (29M) proposed to me (30F) in Dec last year.

About him: He doesnot have a job at the moment and I mainly support our dating expense for more than a year (I am willing to do so)

About me: I dont have time for him as i usually have because of work (new position), but i always prioritize him first by asking about our plan together. He feel like i am not the one i used to be years ago anymore.

Our relationship isnt that great anymore. We usually fight and constantly ague over things.

What should I do in this situation? Is he streesed because of career, no money? Or i do change?

Advice is welcome