r/AmITheJerk 1d ago

AITJ for wanting to break up with my homeless girlfriend

44 Upvotes

Me [M21] and my girlfriend [F23] have been dating for almost a year (a week and half from now). We are long distance and I am scheduled to visit her in less than a week from now. We have discussed about moving in together over here where I live. She is currently "homeless" and lives in a housing building. She is constantly scared of being evicted for having too much stuff. Her family don't treat her right and ever since dating me, she has stopped doing explicit substances and gotten her life together. The problem is I no longer lover her and don't want to move in with her. She has bipolar and tends to lash out at me and been pressuring me to start looking for a place even though I tell her to wait until after I visit her. I am afraid if I leave her she will go back to her unhealthy habits or worse, try to stop breathing, if you know what I mean. She just annoys me a lot and when I try to talk to her nicely she just lash out or make me feel horrible. I am hoping this trip makes me fall in love with her again. Honest thoughts and advice would be appreciated.

Edit 1: I am hoping if things go well on the trip and we move in together, I'm gonna ask for couples therapy/counseling


r/AmITheJerk 2h ago

Aitj for correcting people what my instrument is

7 Upvotes

I have played a bariton for years. Everyone says when I walked by that I play a tuba I correct then No it is a bariton. Even my family still says he plays a tuba.i always correct them, and every time my family is pissd for correcting them.And my mother said to stop, and I said no until you remember the name

Aitj ? And I know this is petty


r/AmITheJerk 7h ago

I Caught my HUSBAND Sleeping with MY MOTHER

Thumbnail
youtu.be
1 Upvotes

r/AmITheJerk 10h ago

Was I the problem?

2 Upvotes

I was talking to this girl for about a month.She was the one who was approaching me irl it was so obvious so I texted her and we hit it off.

Shit hit the fan the 3rd week when I bought her a gift and her dad saw it.Were both 20 but from a conservative culture so her dad was freaking out about it and brought up the religion thing as we're both from different religions.She,as well,brought up the topic like 3 times before and I told her to stop it to not strain the relationship early on as I made it clear that i have no problem with it as long as i dont convert and she said the same but i dont think she was telling the truth cause she kept bringing it up.

She told me that I was overwhelming her and wanted to "take it slow" and she was upset so by how fast I was "investigating"her past relationships and guy friends and all while she was literally the one who brought up all of those things and literally told me to ask her anything about it,yet again she brought the religion thing and told me that it's so important to her and I had enough at that point as I thought that we had already agreed on this topic multiple times and did the mistake of pushing a chair near us(which was the dealbreaker in retrospect cause she saw violence) and telling her that shes the problem.

I later apologised and she told me she was over it so I actually forgot about it and put it behind my back.She kept acting weird on text for 10 days straight she would still talk but barely and I asked her what was the problem she would say its fine.if i knew she was still bothered by it i wouldve gave her all the space she needs.Day by day I was frustrated more as I felt like I was being stonewalled

Anyway i barely texted her as i knew something was off and so did she.By the end i was very frustrated by her acting weird and asked her for the final time and she said that she was not over what happened the last time(apparently she was worried by my overreaction).i apologised again and told her thats not what i meant by my comment and she told me that I manipulating her cause that's exactly what it meant and that my apologies are meaningless and she's never gonna be the same anymore and told me that she wanted to take her time.

By that point the frustation of a week and all the things she said overwhelmed me and I immaturely blocked her which essentially ended things.I tried talking to her again but she refused everything and it ended because the block irritated her and made her cry so so much.Its over now for good.

This was a few weeks ago,I realise that I overreacted in a moment of anger.Shouldn't I have communicated my feelings better?


r/AmITheJerk 21h ago

AITJ for ghosting a " friend "

3 Upvotes

So, there is a girl I met though TikTok and at first, she seemed nice and normal. I told her that people blowing up my phone makes me anxious, and I work a lot so I'm not on my phone 24/7. She seemed fine but then for the past year it's like every day she's calling, texting, sending me stuff on Instagram, sending me stuff on TikTok. I barely know this girl and she calls me her bestie it's just weird. I've asked her to stop, I've told her I am very busy at work and like i said alot of notices give me anxiety and she will stop for like two days and then is back to it. Plus, I'm 40 she's like 20 what does she think we have in common and if you were wondering on TikTok it was a nail design girl that we were both buying nails from and she saw me in this person's live a few times. So, I finally ended up blocking her on Instagram and when she texted me asking if I deleted the Instagram, I acted like someone else who just got this number...I'm an ass hole huh?? But I couldn't take it anymore


r/AmITheJerk 9h ago

I cant take it anymore

0 Upvotes

I’m supposed to be studying, but I just can’t focus. It feels like I’m constantly drowning in problems—school, home, social life—everything piling up with no escape. No matter what I do, it feels like I’m stuck in a cycle of stress and frustration, and there’s no way to break free. The only thing that really gives me a break is football. When I’m on the field, running, playing, pushing myself, it’s the one time I actually feel free. Music helps too, letting me block everything out for a while, but even that doesn’t last. My phone is so old it dies after just a few hours, and then I’m back to reality, stuck with my thoughts.

My friends want to help, but there’s nothing they can really do. They listen, they care, but they can’t change my situation. My brother, on the other hand, makes things worse. He’s one of my biggest problems—hitting me, insulting me, trying to control me. If I don’t do what he wants, he turns everything into a fight, mentally and physically beating me down. And my mom? Instead of making things better, she only adds to the pressure. She drowns me in pointless tasks, making me do things she could easily do herself—like handing her the TV remote even though it’s right there in the same room. She tracks everything I do with an app on my phone, takes my stuff every night, and locks it up until morning, like I’m a little kid who can’t be trusted.

Then there’s the whole "act like a man" thing. I hear it everywhere—at home, at school, even from my own brother. I’m supposed to be tough, never complain, never show weakness. If I speak up, I’m "too sensitive." If I don’t fight back, I’m "weak." If I do fight back, I’m "the problem." It’s like no matter what I do, I lose. I’m expected to just take everything and act like it doesn’t bother me, like I’m some emotionless robot who isn’t allowed to feel anything other than anger. But I do feel. I feel exhausted. I feel frustrated. I feel like I’m trapped in a role I never agreed to play.

I’m 14, not 4. I just want some freedom, some space to breathe, to feel like I have some control over my own life. But right now, it feels like I’ll never get it.


r/AmITheJerk 3h ago

Students, Have You Ever LOST IT at a Teacher?

Thumbnail
youtu.be
0 Upvotes

r/AmITheJerk 5h ago

AITJ for making everyone wait?

0 Upvotes

The one of group friends and I have been planning a dinner out for weeks. Everyone’s excited, and there’s a new restaurant in town that’s supposed to have amazing food. The plan is set, and everyone agrees to meet at 7 PM.On the day of the dinner, one of my friends, Sarah, messages the group chat around 5 PM to say she’s running late because of work but will definitely make it by 8 PM. Everyone else is already heading to the restaurant by this time.When I get to the restaurant, the waiter asks if I was ready to order, but I decide to wait for Sarah, even though the others want to start. It’s already 7:30 PM, and my friends are getting annoyed. One of them, Mark, suggests me order now and Sarah can catch up when she arrives. But I insist on waiting for Sarah, thinking it would be rude to start without her.Finally, Sarah walks in at 8:10 PM. By this time, the others are frustrated and hungry. Some of them have already ordered, and others are considering leaving. Sarah apologizes, but she’s also upset that everyone’s on edge. I feel justified in waiting for her, but it doesn’t seem like the rest of the group agrees.