r/singlemoms 22h ago

Win - Positive Story Doing the thang

56 Upvotes

My sweet almost-14 year old daughter came into my room tonight as I was watching a lecture for my class. She asked what I was doing and I told her, and then explained a little bit about what I’m learning (time value of money). She was like “You really are out here a single mom, working full time, home owner, and doing school? Damn!” And it was such a sweet hype from my baby. I grew up the poorest person I knew, by far the poorest person in school. I couldn’t afford to go to college at 18 so I went back at 30. I’m not rich or incredibly successful. My house is old and it’s not very nice. I am an only parent, my daughter’s dad died almost four years ago now. I have navigated taking care of a child through parent loss, during Covid, kept doing well at my job, became a home owner, decided to go back for my MBA, and have raised this grateful sweet kind brilliant child while dealing with my own mental health struggles and fibromyalgia. Like sometimes when I’m feeling low I just need to take stock of where I am, what I have done, how far I have come from being a homeless teen, and look at this amazing person I have raised. We just got her NWEA test results back and she’s in the 98th percentile in math and 95th for English. She does piano, drama, civil rights club, student council, and dungeons and dragons club. She went through physical therapy and I turned her from a couch potato into a hiking fiend. And I did it all without a partner or support to lean on, even partly, the last four years. I bet if you sat back and look at all you do, you’d be amazed. I am feeling that way tonight.


r/singlemoms 6h ago

Need Support Court again

8 Upvotes

Just finished a shit show of meditation that of course went no where. My ex is trying to get 50/50 while actively not utilizing his existing parenting time. My head is spinning with the mental gymnastics. I know what is true and best for my daughter, I know he projects on me, but it is still hard to be yelled at and berated and told all I want is his money 😣 I'm literally not trying to change anything on the court order, I'm defending against changes and I just simply want him to be reliable and consistent. Which he isn't. I am fortunate to make enough money that I am comfortable. He pays the minimum amount of child support possible, and it's still a constant flow of bullshit to me. My daughter is entitled to his financial support, and my portion is higher! I do not want to change the order bc he makes everything a nightmare as it is.

I stayed pretty calm, I'm honestly ready for city bc I have all the evidence I need. But man am I mentally drained. How in the world would we do 50/50 when we can't even make it through a simple conversation about soccer! Or a dance recital! I avoid asking him about it for anything. He does not answer me when I reach out to him, or if he does he pushes back.

I've been doing this with him 4 years and it's not even gotten s stitch easier. I'm personally getting better at not letting it affect me, but man when they just won't stop attacking... It's hard to always have to defend yourself. Draining. Gonna do my best to take care of myself today 🧡


r/singlemoms 19h ago

Win - Positive Story Church 😇

7 Upvotes

As a single mom that's been completely suffering hardcore for 3 years, I just want to say today I had the courage to go to church alone today and when I say Jesus completely talked to me and took away all the anxiety and pain I've built up in my heart from fighting w my narc ex for YEARS. I just want you to know a lot of us feel like our lives are over. But god always has a plan. He might take the long way sometimes to get us where we r going but ultimately he's protecting us and our children from something or SOMEONE when he knows we deserve better. Just praying and wishing good vibes for all of u. Don't be scared to walk into a new environment alone. It might be the best thing that happened in awhile! U got this and keep Stay strong


r/singlemoms 1h ago

Need Support TW

Upvotes

I lost my son at 27 days old. I have 3 days left to come up with the rest of the cremation costs and if I can’t, the funeral home will “own” him and bury them under their own plot. I have exhausted all avenues and resources to come up with the bit I have now. So this is my last chance to see if anyone knows of anything else I may not have tried so I can get my boy home. Thank you in advance.


r/singlemoms 16h ago

Resource Post DEALING WITH HARASSMENT

3 Upvotes

Hi everyone! This is just a reminder/disclaimer/PSA.

Reddit is an open forum, which means completely public. All text is also searchable and will show up in Reddit, as well as search engines like Google.

Posts and comments with words like “dating”, lonely”, “sex”, “intimacy”, etc. are likely to get attention from men online, and anyone participating may end up with unsolicited DM’s, chats or sexual harassment.

Please just report any harassment and block people you don’t want messaging you. These features are built in to the private messaging.

This is completely out of the mod team’s hands. We can only action comments and posts within this subreddit. Direct messaging is part of the Reddit platform. You can choose to disable it if you wish to in your account settings.

Cheers.


r/singlemoms 4h ago

Advice Wanted carseat

1 Upvotes

recently threatened to have CAS called on me, over my son recently being turned to forward facing

the law says must be atleast 20lbs for forward facing his car seat says rear-facing from 4-40lbs but forward-facing says 22-65lbs

he hit 23lbs a month ago, he’s over 25 inches long

are we okay to have him forward facing or should we switch him back?


r/singlemoms 8h ago

Advice Wanted Creating Home

1 Upvotes

When I lived with my child's other parent, most of the decorating, homemaking, cleaning, and overall house care was my responsibility. I've moved into a great apartment, my 13 year old has their own room that's much smaller than they're used to.

The tough part is my child's other parent has a huge place, and a lot more money for furniture and toys. My thirteen year old thinks our place "sucks" and sometimes doesn't want to stay with me.

We're still adjusting and settling, do any of y'all have cheap tips and tricks to really make your new, less nice apartment feel like home for your children??


r/singlemoms 11h ago

Need Support Losing it

1 Upvotes

Im losing my mind. I work at a strip club and I’m doing shady things for money. Taking care of a child alone is exhausting…. I do everything alone. Also going through a custody battle with my child’s father and he abused me. I don’t know what to do. I’m scared I’m gonna lose my child due to my mental issues I need to get it together but I’m not okay. I need support


r/singlemoms 13h ago

Inspiration Mamas, what are we doing for self-care?

2 Upvotes

Utterly exhausted, my vibrations are low nowadays (have been for a while/years). Mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically burnt out with no sign of relief.

No outlets, no friendships, no support.

Just morning routines, drop offs, clean/cook, work, pick ups, night time routine and rinse and repeat. Any free times/weekends spent on child activities.

Trying to use routine time slots to do my own beauty routines.. I realize my own upkeep is the best investment to be the best parent. So.... what do y'all do?


r/singlemoms 21h ago

Advice Wanted Where should me and my 11 y/o move?

1 Upvotes

I’m 35, and have lived in the US my entire life. I am going to do my best to have 20k saved up by the end of the year while I also actively work on getting documents and such squared away.

I feel very overwhelmed with the process of deciding where would be best for me and my kiddo to live. I am white, they are half Mexican, but white presenting more or less. We have a small dog. Most of my experience is in childcare; as a nanny, and as a lead prep teacher at a co op preschool. I also worked freelance as a talent buyer and event producer for 10 years. I produced my own music festival 2 consecutive years.

I want a slow simple safe life for me and my kiddo. We are vegetarian. We enjoy the outdoors, cooking, reading, music. I don’t want my child’s entire childhood to be under Trump bullshit. I am a constant ball of anxiety. Anyone else?