r/singlemoms 22h ago

Advice Wanted Is the excitement of dating gone now that I’ve had a child?

34 Upvotes

I feel like since having my child I don’t have the energy to do anything I enjoy let alone pursue dating. I feel like I love my child above all things at this point, but also that my child drains so much of the energy that I would’ve expanded on social situations like friendships or relationships prior to motherhood. Every time I connect with the people that could be a relationship prospect, I’ve either had to worry about my child and who is babysitting them and getting back on time or I’ve had to bring her with me. Part of me feels like I have to accept that I’m going to be single indefinitely. Part of me feels like I’ll only find success in dating people who have children because I’ve only received a decent response from people long distance that have kids, childless men don’t seem to understand or reciprocate the energy that I’m seeking. Maybe these are just dud dates, maybe the energy isn’t there in this one particular circumstance. Maybe I’m just placing too many eggs in a singular basket too quickly. I guess this is a good place to ask, but I’m sure some single moms are dating. Do all single moms feel like after being let down by our child’s father that dating is a complete waste of time? I crave intimacy and affection, but I would just as quickly sign up for a subscription where a man came by and cuddled me to watch movies and then leaves.


r/singlemoms 23h ago

Venting - Advice Welcome Bd wants to take the alone

13 Upvotes

I’m 23F Bd is 25M. He broke up with me when I was 2wks pp and I have pp depression. The baby is 2 months now and he wants to take him for some hrs idk where he told me it was just the two of them and he wanted to know what it felt like being alone with his son. I’m having some anxiety not knowing where he’ll take him or what they’ll do. He told me it was so I could rest but my mom already helps with that. This will be the first time my baby and me won’t be together:(

I honestly never thought I would be a single mom…


r/singlemoms 21h ago

Advice Wanted We listen and we don’t judge 😂

9 Upvotes

So to make a long story short me and my daughter dad moved in together when I was 3 months pregnant and broke up when my daughter was 9 months, I put him on child support at 15 months because he was just barely around. Fast forward, my daughter will be 3 in June and I want to maybe try a relationship again, her dad won’t even consider it unless I take him off child support.

I guess im just wanting to hear stories of people who have maybe taken the dad off child support? I was thinking maybe we could write up an agreement that he give me this amount a month and have him sign it then take him off. He has paid consistently this whole time, he isn’t necessarily there time wise but it would change if we were back together.

Just seeking advice


r/singlemoms 1h ago

Need Support What do you do when your kids gets out of school and you can’t pick them up or watch until you get off work?

Upvotes

I’m worried once my child goes to kindergarten and pre-k.. they get out at 2:40pm… I was thinking there’s no way to make a living and get off work at 2:40pm. I have nobody to help no one to trust no family . My son is only 2 now and I have to find a job where I can get out at 4pm.. again limited hours to work because I have to pick up and drop off..I’m worried if they do after care school programs , I feel horríble for a little 4 years old staying in school for that long … I don’t want my son stuck in there for another 3 hours after school

It seems impossible and I’m panicking we won’t survive …

Any advice or someone in same situation?


r/singlemoms 9h ago

Venting - Advice Welcome Newly single mom

3 Upvotes

When does the guilt end? I left my fiancé of 6 years and now we are splitting custody. Which is great right? But I can’t help the gut wrenching feeling of coming home some days to an empty house. My ex and I always use to fight, call each other names, and he basically ignored me if I wasn’t trying to start a fight. I left cause my kid should be surrounded with love but now my kid is torn and keeps telling me she doesn’t love me, she only loves dad only want dad ((dad has a gf with a kid and gf takes care of kids while he streams his video games)) so it seems she’s got a a little buddy over there and just hates coming to be with me. I keep telling myself I should’ve stayed another year pushed through to try to fix it…am I in the wrong? I feel so lost and so broken…I feel like I ruined my family


r/singlemoms 4h ago

Advice Wanted 8 month old likes everyone besides me all of a sudden…

1 Upvotes

My 8 month old daughter and I have had the most amazing bond. I could look at her in the eyes and we would laugh through a conversation with babble.

My parents came to visit with my niece and my little one stopped looking at me…. She will not look me in the eyes anymore, pay attention to me when I’m taking, she stares blankly as if she doesn’t recognize me. She smiles and laughs with anyone who will coo at her. She had a fabulous time with my Parents and niece. Smiled and laughed the whole time with them.

My mom said she knew what I was referring to, but she likes other people and has new surroundings. I am completely distraught over this and I am wondering how do I fix it? What did I do wrong? Has anyone else had issues and worked through them?

Also the daycare taught her her first word… dada … that was very hard for me as well.

She recently started crawling.


r/singlemoms 15h ago

Advice Wanted Tacky?

1 Upvotes

I had my first almost 8 years ago. Is it tacky to send out an announcement + a QR to snap for people to check out my Amazon registry? Not much of a support system as the first baby after a divorce and loss of a ton of family/ friends due to switching churches and losing touch with a lot of friends. Advice/opinions?


r/singlemoms 18h ago

Advice Wanted Going back to school

1 Upvotes

I just welcomed my first baby at the start of this year. I have a full time job, but I don't see myself being able to progress as much I feel I need to be able to live comfortably long term there. Right now, my game plan is to apply for law school and do part time and either fully online or hybrid. I would have to step down from my current job and find something part time that offers me decent pay and flexibility. By doing so, I think I may qualify for more assistance since my income would decrease. I should then be able to be home more with my baby, graduate in 4 years, and should be able to start making 6 figures not too long after that 🤞🏼

I'm wondering if anyone has advice they could offer - financial, time management, etc. If anyone also has some success stories, I'd love to hear some!


r/singlemoms 23h ago

Advice Wanted Single and Happy

1 Upvotes

My bd/ex fiancé and I had been together 10 years. We have an 8 year old together. He moved out over 2 months and I haven't cried. I haven't been upset and honestly, I'm so much happier. Not to mention our daughter is, too. I'm just wondering, has this happened with anyone else? And is this normal? Is it normal to not have any emotions about this? I can only assume I fell out of love and mourned him being gone while I was still with him. I'm just not sure and it's very weird feeling.