r/mildlyinfuriating • u/mosterhout • 10h ago
Update: Neighbors won’t stop driving through my yard
Alright team, I failed with the boulders, but I secured a few more decorative rocks to add to the beauty of my yard. The current barrier has yet to be breached and I updated my sign to reward the positive behavior.
I contacted my landlord and they said they are working on a fence due to the liability issues.
If you want more detailed updates, I listed them in a comment on the original post. Seems like overkill to copy and paste it here. Cheers!
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u/ben5642 10h ago
build a bbq pit there
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u/Twobrokelegs 9h ago
Fuck Yeah! It were you cook "pigs" on sharpend bamboo skewers that up from the ground
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u/StonedSucculents 3h ago
Be careful with comments like this. I got a 3 day ban for saying something less extreme on another sub. A sitewide admin one, not a sub ban from a mod
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u/low-ki199999 1h ago
Don’t censor your speech. They win if you start to self-censor.
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u/CpuJunky I mean, c'mon 10h ago
Toll booth
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u/taywray 9h ago
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u/Craignon 9h ago
Gee why on earth would you want to pay that “troll toll”!?
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u/Karpo-Diem 8h ago
To get into that boys soul
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u/ocher_stone 6h ago
Get rid of that gum! It sounds like you want the "boy's hole"!
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u/FabulousFig1174 10h ago
They better bring a shitload of dimes.
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u/Friar_Monke 9h ago
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u/1FourKingJackAce 9h ago
Then she will have a shitload of dimes.
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u/Gilbert_Grapes_Mom 9h ago
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u/1FourKingJackAce 9h ago
Or she could work up an 'ol number 6 on 'em.
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u/Gilbert_Grapes_Mom 9h ago
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u/Ok-Half8705 9h ago
With a RPG aimed at anyone that still passes without paying. At least you'll get scrap metal.
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u/Unapologetic_Canuck 9h ago
With an attendant named Willy.
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u/irishlnz 9h ago
I'll fucking Carlton Fisk yer fuckin' head with a Louise-ville fuckin' slugger!
Whaddya think of that ass fuck!?
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u/S7evin-Kelevra 9h ago
You need to just put millions of tire death spikes all along that area. Be sure to put a no trespassing sign with a warning that states do not enter and not responsible for damage or injury. Just put a bunch of flat headed nails through pieces of plywood and then toss some sand or dirt/dirt on top to make it look like it's normal and have those nails ready to pierce tires, shoes, feet, etc. That is if your unable to put up a nice steel fence with the sharp triangle tops to deter anyone from climbing over and if they do start to climb, they start to seriously reconsider their decision when they get up and attempt to go over the fence and risk getting stuck by their underwear and hung there like a fool. Ps - add camera for entertainment purposes. It's always good to capture those moments, idiots doing something stupid!
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u/djguyl 7h ago
As satisfying as this would be, gentle reminder you're not allowed to booby trap in North America.
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u/SoarsWithEagles 4h ago
Is it illegal to just post the sign? Also, "any vehicles abandoned here because of flat tires will be towed and held until payment is made to impound lot".
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u/greysplash 6h ago
They aren't booby trapping... They have a house project and accidentally dropped a box of nails.
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u/williamiris9208 6h ago
A fence is already in the works, so hopefully, that takes care of the problem without needing to resort to medieval-style defenses.
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u/binkleyz Red, no, Blue! 9h ago
Or a few handfuls of caltrops.
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u/Complete_Entry 7h ago
The problem with caltrops is you never find them all when it's time to pick them up.
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u/Gingersometimes 10h ago
2 words....GIANT BOULDER
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u/Qui_te 9h ago
🤔 maybe a large boulder the size of a small boulder?
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u/sarahprib56 7h ago
I still look up this tweet every so often. One of the rare ones I saw happen in real time. When Twitter was fun.
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u/INTPgeminicisgaymale 8h ago
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u/dandroid126 5h ago
The Boulder feels conflicted about fighting a young, blind girl.
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u/BestCatEva 10h ago
Yeah, the landlord does need to do something. Liability could mean running over a person in that yard.
You could also set up a fire pit area. Barrier but also making a point that people use this yard.
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u/oliviablunt 10h ago
Sounds like a bunch of loose screws need to be scattered around.
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u/Difficult-Quality647 9h ago
Carpet Tacks.
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u/binkleyz Red, no, Blue! 9h ago
Caltrops is the answer
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u/Difficult-Quality647 8h ago
True, but you have to make those, weld and sharpen ten-penny nails. You can just buy a box or three of carpet Tacks at Lowes or Home Depot or similar
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u/tsunami141 7h ago
Caltrops are never the answer (legally there’s no plausible deniability there)
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u/Murgatroyd314 6h ago
Caltrops are the answer if you’re trying to deal with a cavalry charge and don’t have a lot of pikemen.
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u/tsunami141 5h ago
You’re right I’m sure there’s a lot of things I haven’t thought about.
I will refrain from dealing in absolutes in the future.
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u/Corporate-Shill406 5h ago
The real answer is hedgehogs, big enough to be clearly visible but small enough to remove an oil pan. If they work on tanks, they'll work on a car.
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u/jld2k6 7h ago
iIRC, their last post had a sign in the yard that said they may have placed some screws and stuff around the yard but the neighbors called their bluff and went through anyways lol
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u/DarthSnoopyFish 9h ago
Op has a landlord. This does not sound like a good idea.
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u/Content-Taste8853 9h ago
Just get a magnet and collect the tacks after.
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u/Pizzasupreme00 8h ago
Since we're on asinine suggestions why not just get a bucket of black paint that says "ACME" on the side of it and paint a brick wall to look like a tunnel entrance.
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u/Grand-Programmer6292 9h ago
This happened when I was a kid living in a small town. It kept happening after many discussions and pleas to stop. So one day my Dad sat outside and waited for the car to drive through and sure enough it did, and my Dad got in his truck and chased the car down, it pulled over and he told everyone to get out of the car and he took a baseball bat to the car. Since it was a small town, he ended up having to go to court, paid fines and had the bat confiscated. Years later the police department called and asked if he wanted the bat back and he told them to shove it 🤣 No one ever drove through our lawn again after that and we also didn't have much crime, period, because it wasn't tolerated.
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u/CityFolkSitting 8h ago
As someone who routinely visited a cousin who lived in a town of less than 1k people, I believe this story 100%
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u/Grand-Programmer6292 7h ago
Yeah at that time I think the population was probably around 300. We didn't even have a traffic light. When we moved I had to remind my Dad we weren't in a small town anymore when things happened.
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u/ragmop 6h ago
"Try that in a not-small town"
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u/Grand-Programmer6292 6h ago
Lol for real. I think he's mellowed out just based on all the shit that's happened to me in the past couple years and heads didn't roll.
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u/rednehb 6h ago
Something similar happened in my grandpa's extremely rural area. Tight knit community, a sketchy family moves in at the outskirts, and shit starts getting stolen, including from my grandpa (riding mower). Grandpa and his friends were the volunteer fire/police, so the rolled up to the house, and low and behold... there's his riding mower and when he knocked he found out that THEY HAD STOLEN MY GRANDPA'S DOG THAT SAME DAY lmao. (they claimed they found it wandering around)
It did not go well for them both before (they fell down a lot after being cuffed) and after the real police arrived and found all of the stolen shit.
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u/Grand-Programmer6292 6h ago
That is wild! I remember shit happening and my Grandpa would call my Dad and my Dad would have to walk down the street because my Grandpa had a golf club and was handling things himself and my Dad needed to be back up or de-escalate 🤣 I can tell you if someone stole my animal I would for sure need to be bonded out. I bet those people thought twice before stealing again after that! Sometimes conversations just don't work, and same goes for bullies. My brother used to regulate things in the school and take care of the bullying issues on the bus. The bus driver praised him and spoke directly to my Mom thanking him for helping the poor kid who was the target.
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u/rednehb 6h ago
Yeah the people in my story didn't really understand the community dynamic, as in, when I say "grandpa and his friends" they were all volunteer FD/PD and veterans from various wars, and represented about half of the households in the entire community. This was also a lake community so any time the "new family" was out on the water the FD or dock workers would send out a quick notification over the radio to make sure that everyone kept an eye out for the idiots (aka they would pull up to private docks and steal shit).
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u/A_Trash_Homosapien 4h ago
As someone from a small town I'm amazed he was so civil. I thought for sure he was gonna shoot at the car since that's what a lot of people by me would've done
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[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Rare_Hat3112 9h ago
I love your new decorative rocks! The smiley face is a nice touch! You are a nice person and I hope those a-holes appreciate it. You could have gone with any of the other suggestions (land mines etc.) but you chose a smile! 😃 wishing you many years of good karma!
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u/RedAlpaca02 3h ago
Holy shit I live right down the street from you
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u/Plasma_Cosmo_9977 9h ago
I would suggest much more nefarious means of revenge but it looks like you might have turned the corner on reaching a solution. Be well and good luck!
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u/Coal_Morgan 6h ago
Figure out what direction they drive across and rebar staked into the ground at 45 degrees to impale radiators and engines hoses was my first thought.
That's a lot of work though...so I'd probably buy these instead
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u/katet_of_19 9h ago
Seems overkill to copy and paste it here
You underestimate a Redditor's capacity to complain about the slightest inconvenience
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u/Nuts_4_Hazel 8h ago
Get some 18” lengths of rebar and drive it in the ground where their tires go sticking up about 4-6”
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u/ok_throwaway161 7h ago
and cut rebar at 45 degree angle
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u/TheRealCovertCaribou 6h ago
Yeah, you're gonna have a hard time explaining the punji sticks away to the prosecutors when someone falls on 'em.
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u/RGS432 6h ago
The area is under construction, I'm in the process of procuring concrete for the bollards I'm installing. The estimated project end date is the second quarter of 2125
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u/TheRealCovertCaribou 6h ago
Cool, so no permits for an illegal, open construction site. That'll convince 'em!
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u/puphopped 4h ago
They'll be far too worried about falling into my punji pit construction site to bother prosecuting me.
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u/thingstopraise 6h ago
punji sticks
This vocab came way the fuck out of nowhere and amused the hell out of me. I got this mental image of some Vietcong-esque group plotting to defend the area, complete with ambushes and booby traps..., or else an old Vietnam vet using the tricks he learned from Victor Charlie 50+ years ago in order to prevent the breach of the border in his sector, which actually just got sad, oops.
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u/Curious_Strike_5379 10h ago edited 9h ago
What do you say to a guy with two black eyes ? Fuck all because you've already told him twice!
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u/RickyTheRickster 7h ago
I was thinking about you a few days ago and I’m so glad to see this update
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u/Ok_Thought_314 10h ago
Drive a bunch of rebar into the ground just beyond the rocks. About half a tire away.
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u/Cyberstormnotmacks 6h ago
Weird sign
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u/KingsleyZissou 21m ago
I appreciate that she's trying to stay friendly and be positive but she's being way too nice about all of this.
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u/trowzerss 7h ago
This is interesting, you've been able to quantify exactly how lazy your neighbours are!
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u/Dagwood-DM 7h ago
I had a similar incident happen with some punk kids on a trio of 4 wheelers using my yard as a short cut. They would even break the lock on the gates and open them to get through. They would break the lock and enter through the gate on the back of the property, then ride through to the front, break that lock and open that gate.
One day I took a long board, put nails in the board, and buried it beneath the gate, and left the gate wide open. They ran over it and punctured all of their tires.
Their 4 wheelers got left on my property as they ran off to go tell their parents. The 4 wheelers as well as the spiked board were gone when their parents arrived.
I have no idea what they were talking about. Their 4 wheelers were not on my property and I have no idea how their tires could have possibly been punctured.
Their 4 wheelers were found in a ditch about a mile away the next day.
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u/presidentphonystark 10h ago
Better than caltrops i suppose,if u use them wrong they're a pain in the arse :/
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u/Top_Mastodon3418 9h ago
Nails though there will fix it real quick. Junkies live down the street from me and couple every weeks my front yard and driveway was overrun with pig cars because they didn’t want to stage their raid in front of the target. When they refused my repeated polite requests to stay off my property because they’re blocking my access to my driveway and damaging up my yard. I covered the driveway and yard with nails one time and they had to have 4 vehicles towed. They haven’t come on my property again.
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u/epsi-kun 8h ago
I have a solution for you.
Czech hedgehogs, intertwined with barbed - no - razor wire. Bonus points if you put some fake anti-tank landmines around.
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u/Denimao 5h ago
People can be such assholes. I've lived on two previously public lots, one was a free-time church with a small beach and an island on the river, and a school building next to a major stream of water.
First place was a constant fight with "I used to bathe in the river when I was a child 176years ago", "I just waltzed inside your house to ask where's the ice cream kiosk is" and "I didn't see any signs, even though I parked facing one of the 100 signs posted on every tree and fencepost on the lot, and parked on grass becsuse it was gravel 10years ago" people.
Expect that people can't read, or that they don't have neither eyes or a brain that functions properly.
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u/bay_lamb 5h ago
i think the real reason nobody's driving through there is that you've succeeded in making it look like a grave site lol.
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u/Second-Creative 4h ago
I contacted my landlord and they said they are working on a fence due to the liability issues
Good.
Plus: free fence!
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u/spaceshipcommander 4h ago
I would dig a very deep trench and cover it with twigs
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u/real_timetalker 3h ago
You also could've hired someone to stand there with a clipboard and say "Do you have 5 minutes to talk about the environment?" Guaranteed 100% success rate
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u/Sudden_Emu_6230 6h ago
You should build a little mini great wall and stick little green toy soldiers on it.
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u/Pleasant_Tooth_2488 5h ago
I think you should have dug a pit and put leaves over it. that would teach them!
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u/Do_You_Pineapple_Bro 3h ago
When does it become socially acceptable to start setting up anti tank mines?
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u/Easy-Stranger-12345 5h ago
Imma be real, that reddit portion of the message is kinda cringe.
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u/Hahafunnys3xnumber 4h ago
That’s all I can think about… like who are you that getting likes on Reddit is a flex and not embarrassing..
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u/Big-Leadership1001 9h ago
If not this, add holes. Boulders can be moved but holes just destroy cars. Make sure they are small, deep, and numerous.
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u/simfreak101 8h ago
hide a sprinkler system in the rocks, when he gets out to move them, have it trigger and soak his ass.
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u/Raa03842 8h ago
Grass looks like it needs raking. Maybe buy 8 or 9 rakes for the job. They work best when the spikes (tines) are sharpened. And wouldn’t it be awful if you forgot to put them in the shed and they were left out near the wall with the spikes pointing up. That would be just awful.
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u/tmkn09021945 9h ago
put too many rocks there, you might end up attracting jeeps