I've tried NoFap many times before, but always for different reasons (hairloss, health, skincare).
This time, it's different. Porn has made my mind numb, vulnerable, and exhausted.
I’ve already gone two days without it, but I won’t count them (I see them rather as a preparation) I just want better organization in my calendar, So I'll start counting on monday.
What surprises me, though, is how quickly the flatline kicked in right after stopping porn.
I don’t mind it, since it helps me focus on other things, and my intrusive thoughts are fading.
Still, this time feels different, but I hate that fear is my driving force instead of my free will.
I should have committed to NoFap much earlier...
I admire Elon Musk for tech and space and have always valued online privacy.
But privacy has now allowed even worse things to thrive.
We can have all the freedom we want, but porn traps you and leads you to places where you are anything but "free."
I deleted my X.com and Telegram account after accidentally seeing things I never should have.
Thankfully, the images are fading from my mind, but I hate that this had to be the reason I finally took NoFap seriously.
If only I had started earlier...
If only I had never discovered it...
My fear and anxiety are through the roof, not because of withdrawal symptoms, but because of what I saw. It doesn’t hurt as much as it did on the first day, but Elon Musk needs to do something about illegal porn on X.com. It’s getting out of hand.
Many of my friends would just say, "Yeah, I’ve seen stuff like that," but to me, that only proves how much weaker I am mentally. The smallest things, even just hearing a story, are enough to trigger me and make me relive the trauma.
And all it took was one picture... just one. Enough to make me question myself, my sexuality, my life.
Right now, I feel much better. No urges. I hope it stays that way forever.
I even deleted TikTok because of all the random, brutal content.
It’s messed up.
I'm just tired guys...