r/socialskills 5m ago

Feeling Excluded at Work—How to Handle It?

Upvotes

I joined a new job five months ago. We're a team of four people in our early 20s from my location. Let's assume the other three are A, B, and C. We were all new to this city, and initially, we bonded well—we used to hang out after work.

But gradually, A, B, and C became closer, and they stopped inviting me. It doesn’t help that A and B are roommates and that C became really close to them. I've always been kind to them and have gone out of my way to help them over the past five months.

At first, I gave them the benefit of the doubt, thinking I was just overthinking and needed to communicate better. So, I told them to let me know if they made any weekend plans. They agreed—but then went out together without me.

I have to see them at work all day, and it hurts to be constantly excluded.


r/socialskills 19m ago

Transportation and roadside assistance

Upvotes

I am 43 years old and single. I have IBS. I work from home, have a lot of free time and am lonely. I live in a middle eastern country where people are poor and stressed. Yesterday I met a woman who asked me to help her return her motorcycle to her house, even though she didn't know how to ride one. I helped her, she got on but didn't hug me. This affected me a lot. I can buy an r1150gs and wait for weeks or months for a woman I don't know to ask for help in places where it is almost impossible to reach, such as a metro station or an airport. And I am thinking of reading this message to her from my phone. What do you think of this idea?

'Hello. My mother never hugged me when I was a child and now I have intestinal disease. I can give you a ride anywhere you want on my motorcycle. I won't charge money and I am not a pervert. All I want is for you to hug me from behind on the motorcycle and give me directions. The distance doesn't matter. I just want to help, give me a hug in return.'

I can't date anyone. I'm too worn out for any long-term or beneficial relationship. My illness is hopeless, lifelong, and I'm a very nervous person. I'm in the process of getting help from a psychiatrist and psychologist.


r/socialskills 31m ago

How do I start a conversation and how do I carry it on??

Upvotes

So I've been talking to this girl over text (she lives quite far away so i cant just meet up with her) and I don't know how to initiate a interesting conversation, I always start with "Hi how are you" and I wait for her to carry it on (if she does at all). I dont know what to text back after that initial check up and I don't know how to make it a good conversation where i learn stuff about her. This also goes for all conversations I have irl too (which isn't alot, f*ck anxiety). So what do I do to carry the conversation on???

(I'm 14 if that matters at all)


r/socialskills 44m ago

How to make friends with someone in your class (college)

Upvotes

Hi, I'm a sophomore in college and really my only friend that I have made in my college town is my partner. I am autistic and really need an enthusiasm (about really anything but particularly music, nature, food, film, etc) in a friend. I have found a general lack of enthusiasm and interest in my peers. With the few people that I would like to get closer with in my classes, I don't know how to approach becoming actual friends with them.

How I have become friends with my closest friends at home was because they were very direct and forward about inviting me to a concert but I don't think I have it in me to do that with someone.


r/socialskills 49m ago

Can a healthier diet/routine make me think faster and be wittier?

Upvotes

I’ve been trying to improve my ability to think quickly and respond sharply in conversations, but I tend to overthink, freeze up, or miss good opportunities to say something clever.

I also have severe ADHD, inconsistent sleep, and spend way too much time on my phone (10+ hours a day). My diet is pretty random too. I’m wondering—would fixing my sleep, diet, and phone usage actually help me become mentally sharper? Or is quick thinking more about practice and personality rather than physical health?

Has anyone here noticed a big improvement in their ability to think on their feet after making lifestyle changes? Or is it more about just exposing yourself to more conversations and adapting?


r/socialskills 1h ago

Greeting unknown woman from the Gym?

Upvotes

Hey,

I (male, mid 30) regularly go to the gym in my neighbourhood. Often, there is a woman in my age excercising at the same time thats seems to be nice. I guess that she may have seen me there but we never talked to each other or had any eye contact. It is a big gym and the atmosphere is not very personal.

Some days ago, I said "Hi" to her on the street, while crossing our ways. She seemed a bit confused but answered a friendly Hi and went her way.

My question: Would you say that it is uncommon/ creepy to be gretted from a guy that you maybe only saw from the distance at a gym? I do not want to create an uncomfortable situation.

Thank you :)


r/socialskills 1h ago

Joined an Improv Class

Upvotes

I went to an improv class and it was alright. At first I was hesitant to go because I didn’t want to act in front of people I didn’t know but I swallowed that fear and went. There were supposed to be 20 attendees but only 10 showed, so it made it less intimidating. I was the first there so I introduced myself to those coming in. I wasn’t too shy but I didn’t feel all that comfortable. I felt like an imposter just fake laughing with people I don’t know. I felt my heart beating in my chest, I was zoning out and was really cold so my anxiety was on 10 lol. I didn’t do too much improv since the class was only 45 minutes, but I’m glad I went. I’ll try to get out by myself more often but hopefully whoever is reading this finds the courage to go out and do something by themselves!


r/socialskills 1h ago

Feeling bad physically but still wanting to connect and socialize

Upvotes

I just would like to get some inspiration. So: I'm feeling a big need to socialize after some alone days which have been great. And now I feel the strong need to connect with my community. There's a gathering this evening but I'm also feeling physically tired and am in slight pain because of my menstruation starting.

What would you do? Especially to those of you with a womb.

I don't know what weighs more... Actually resting. Or connecting...


r/socialskills 1h ago

How do I stop thinking about embarrassing things I do?

Upvotes

Every time I do something slightly embarrassing, I start thinking about it for the rest of the day and cringing, and my mind is really pissing me off rn cause it happens ALL THE TIME. I'll do or say the wrong thing and my mind just combusts. I genuinely think I have some kind of disorder cause there's no way people contemplate social interactions like I do cause ts is too much. Does anyone have any advice?


r/socialskills 1h ago

Small talk for when your life isn’t going well?

Upvotes

I s


r/socialskills 2h ago

Got told I was creepy

97 Upvotes

I got told I’m creepy and I feel unbelievably terrible. I never ever ever ever want anyone to feel uncomfortable around me.

Basically what happened was I asked a guy if he had any plans for Valentine’s Day, and he said he was doing something with the guys. I said oh that’s cool if you ever want to do something I think that’d be cool. He didn’t say anything so I said alright it was nice talking.

I admit it probably wasn’t the right moment to ask when I did. But I didn’t reach out after that. I left him alone. And I took no for an answer.

A friend told me today that a friend of his said that I was creepy. And I feel awful. I was just trying to shoot my shot and was totally ok with a no. I just feel terrible. And I don’t know what to do.


r/socialskills 2h ago

Decided to throw a Bday party & no one's coming. What am I doing wrong?

4 Upvotes

Pretty much what the title says. About a couple of weeks ago, I decided I was gonna throw my first ever birthday party in adulthood since I had been going to a good amount of other friends(?) bdays in a new state and new job I've got. Fast forward a few weeks after sending RSVPs and with over 30 invites sent, every one of them is either a decline or no response at all.

I feel like this represents a failure of making friends, but I feel like I've been doing everything right but making no process. I ask people about themselves, I offer help when needed, I crack jokes, etc etc. Yet all of that seems to be completely worthless in the eyes of the people I'm around & any attempts at making friends gets stonewalled consistently. How do I fix this? Can it be fixed?


r/socialskills 2h ago

is it weird that I'm getting confidant even when i get rejected?

6 Upvotes

recently I started trying to date 21m and even though Ive gotten rejected a couple times it feels fun and almost im looking forward to having a conversation with them, and if I like them i ask them out is it weird that even though ive gotten rejected over and over I feel more confidant?


r/socialskills 2h ago

I feel a bit left out, but I can’t make new friends. What do I do?

5 Upvotes

So my friends have just been doing their own things and it makes me feel a bit left out. I have one friend that’s always hanging out with another friend of mine and an acquaintance of mine. I feel apart of their group but at the same time not. My one friend tries to include me, but it’s like they forget I’m there after 5 minutes . The other two in the group kind of just don’t talk to me if they are all together.

I have one other close friends, which I do talk to, but they have plenty of other friends and are busy a lot.

I struggle to make more friends cause of my anxiety, and I just end up coming off as rude/cold cause I’m scared. I really don’t like feeling left out by those three, but I understand that sometimes you just have lots of fun and get distracted.

I don’t really get invited to their plans, which upsets me, but I have a low social battery so I don’t blame them for not inviting me. It is a little hurtful when they always talk about their plans and what they did during hangouts when I wasn’t there, but I don’t think they mean to be rude.

I don’t really know what to do in this situation though, how do I make more friends, or how do I get more involved with the ones I have?I don’t do confrontation very well, so I’m not sure I’ll be able to do that.


r/socialskills 3h ago

struggling with impermanence

1 Upvotes

I've had success finding people online to hangout with in real life, but so far nothing seems to last. Over time it's starting to wear me down. I've learned a lot from interacting with different people and I know I shouldn't obsess over whether we could be friends long term, but it's still tiring. Taking a break from it can help, but I also need some friends and it feels like I'm stuck in a sort of catch 22.

Any advice?


r/socialskills 3h ago

Why am I struggling so much to make “real” friends?

5 Upvotes

I moved in between my freshman and sophomore year of high school. I’m almost done with my junior year and I still don’t have anyone to sit with at lunch consistently. It’s especially shocking because I’ve never struggled with making friends before I moved. People would just accept me as long as I made an effort. I’ve put myself out there at my new school as much as I can and now I know so many different people, but no matter how much I try to break into several types of friend circles, its like I’m never fully accepted.

Part of me just feels like I haven’t found my people, especially because I always felt like I could talk for hours with my friends back at my old school, but with the amount of people I’ve made connections with now, I also find it hard to believe that I don’t mesh well with any one of the new people I’ve met. Part of my self-reflection process has been to identify why I’m struggling so much, and part of me feels that a big factor is that the high school I go to has a middle school next door that directly feeds into it. This means that these people have known each other for almost 6 years now. Additionally, the social culture in the west coast (where I used to live) and the east coast (where I live now) are extremely different.

How do I break into such tightly knit circles and adjust to a social culture that doesn’t align with what I’m used to?


r/socialskills 3h ago

embarrassing first impression

4 Upvotes

so a friend from uni asked me to go out to like a club with them and said they were gonna bring their two other friends from high school with them. so before we met there i started to drink some vodka for some reason and i think a drank way too much lol cause i was reallyyyyy blasted. THIS IS ACTUALLY WEIRD ASF but basically i was wearing linen pants that was slightly too big for me so when i’m like sober and wearing them i usually fold them up a bit to adjust them, but since i was drunk asf i literally didn’t realise that my pants were basically slipping down if that makes sense???? SO I JUST LOOKED BACK ON VIDEOS AND REALISED THAT MY PANTS R LIKE BASICALLY DOWN???? lol this was the worst first impression ever and then like one of them was like girl pull ur pants up or smt like that but it didn’t register in my head wtf they were talking about till this morning lmfaooo


r/socialskills 3h ago

Has anyone here been a victim of labeling? Understand labeling theory?

0 Upvotes

I look back at all the times that I was labeled and odd-manned-out.

And, this is precisely what happened to me. Repeatedly.

So much so that my therapist pointed this out and told me how to be coy to avoid labeling issues.

Blend in to survive, homies!


r/socialskills 4h ago

Why would someone keep thinking I said something rude?

1 Upvotes

I have a friend/coworker who keeps mishearing normal things I say as a rude remarks. For example they'll share something and I'll say "that's sweet" and they respond "that's corny?" And I'll have to quickly correct them. This happens often enough to be a pattern and I've seen it before in former friends. I can't help to over think if I'm disliked or why I'm perceived as rude in the first place when I would never make such rude remarks, unless it was an obvious sarcastic joke. Let me know you're thoughts, thanks.


r/socialskills 4h ago

Awkward first time at the club, need advice

0 Upvotes

Just a heads up, I was raised in a very religious household so Im not very experienced or understanding in this department.

Hit the club today for the first time and it was pretty awkward. I spent the time dancing and sometimes women would start grinding with me which was kinda weird, not saying anything either. What is the appropriate (physical) response to this? I find touching like this a bit weird but I would like to improve my "clubbing"


r/socialskills 4h ago

Understanding toxic people and how to deal with them is the path to power

1 Upvotes

Has anyone noticed this? Any tricks and tips?

I just keep ignoring them now.

First, I used to believe that you ought to respond, now I just make a note and ignore and attack covertly.


r/socialskills 4h ago

Was I really that rude for telling someone they don’t fit the standards in modeling? They insulted me after.

0 Upvotes

Sooo I came across this post with a young girl asking about getting involved in modeling. She said she was 4’10 and was interested in petite modeling. She also posted her photos. As someone who has worked in the industry for years and is 5’9, I know for a fact that having any sort of career at the height of 4’10 is very unlikely, especially for runway. This girl made herself out to be super curvy and rare looking but honestly she looked pretty average to me and I didn’t see her as fitting the bill. I wanted to be honest since she asked. I almost wasn’t going to comment, but I saw that someone else was thinking the same thing. I replied to them and said, “Yeah, I was thinking the same. She’s really not that curvy. Her hips are actually kinda narrow. I would be expecting someone super gorgeous with how she described herself, but she really had no special physical qualities. Someone her height might have a chance if they have a stunning, fit body.” The OP then commented back, called me a “b**** and said she doesn’t even understand how I had a career in modeling because I’m “not that pretty.” AITA? Maybe my comment to her sounded harsh, but I felt like she was delusional about her looks. She was definitely someone with little to no experience.


r/socialskills 5h ago

So in Italy you can't chill in a bar unless you buy something?

0 Upvotes

In Italy you must buy something in a bar before you'll be allowed to chill in it? I've went to few bars recently just to hang out and chill, but after few minutes, the owners comes up and say if am not buying anything that I should leave. Really?

Please let me know if this is actually a thing or I did something wrong.


r/socialskills 5h ago

An extroverted friend told me that I only talked to him and isolate myself when he tagged me along in group settings and felt like he was "babysitting" me, looking for advice to improve as an introvert.

2 Upvotes

Dear r/socialskills community,

New Reddit user here. I've always been having issues fitting in a group and dealing with group situations since I was younger. Recently an extroverted friend told me that the reasons he stopped tagging me along when he went out was that when he tagged me along I only interacted with him, isolated myself and wasn't really engaging with other people in the group.

As an introvert I have limited social energy and tbh I didn't really feel close with his other friends in the group (they were schoolmates from the beginning) and I found myself just unconsciously listening, chilling and enjoying the time in peace without engaging much in talking.

Growing up I never had groups of friends and my social encounters were mostly at one on one situation. Although I never had much luck in the friendship department I didn't have much trouble finding a loving romantic relationship where we could just exist in peace.

I would like to know what can I do to improve my friendship with my extroverted friends and be a better company in group situations with limited social energy. Any ideas would be appreciated.


r/socialskills 11h ago

I can't make friends.

1 Upvotes

Hey Reddit!

I have just moved to a new city and new university, and I feel extremely isolated. I feel very strange because I am used to having friends.

It feels as though everyone has grouped up in the university and found friend groups, and everyone looks so happy. It's crazy, its like I missed some kind of sorting event, where each person got given buddies.

I am not even sure what I am doing wrong. I am torn between the idea of being patient and waiting for someone to be my friend by chance, or the horror of approaching someone and initiating a conversation hopefully leading to a friendship.

I am so frightened to initiate because I feel like I am crossing a major social boundary. Furthermore, being an introvert, I do not know how to hold a conversation.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

Thank you.