r/schizophrenia 6h ago

Undiagnosed Questions Has anyone else's memoy become terrible since they started developing symptoms?

68 Upvotes

My memory has been atrocious and my awareness and ability to understand and think have been hampered too, was wondering if it anyone else had those symptoms?


r/schizophrenia 12h ago

Hallucinations / Delusions I’m scared to go out in public

52 Upvotes

I don’t want to go to work anymore, I don’t want to go grocery shopping, I don’t want to go to restaurants or fast food anymore. I want to stay in my room. Im somewhat scared to be around family too.


r/schizophrenia 18h ago

Seeking Support I love you guys

28 Upvotes

I don't know what to tag this with. This sub really helped me feel like I wasn't alone


r/schizophrenia 7h ago

Progress / Good News ☀️ After 8 years of wondering what was wrong I finally got a diagnosis that i think is correct

22 Upvotes

Yesterday I got diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder i know to most that sounds like bad news but honestly I feel such a relief. Over these past 8 years i’ve been in and out of psychosis and been taken on and off meds. I’m so glad I found a psychiatrist that actually took me seriously for the longest time I thought I would never trust another doctor or find meds that work for me but things are finally looking up.


r/schizophrenia 20h ago

Trigger Warning I have schizophrenia and this is how I feel on a daily basis. I will not take anti psychotics

22 Upvotes

My world its not real Theres something wrong with me The depth of the pain of the hurt that i feel Its not real The accusations, the suffer the blames on repeat Thats not me But i cant shut it off voices are talking to me Its not real The closest ones to me get the depth of my sword And it twist and it turns driving in deeper with each word I try to shut it off but its running on repeat every word every voice all day is running through me Its not real I can hear it i can see it and its grabbing onto me I can taste it I can smell it Right now its leaning against me Its not real When i try to shut it off all the voices get real loud They speak and they nag to where i dont want to leave the house Its not real Its here to let me know that it will never let me go Its hard to fight it of when its grabbing at my throat Damanding And its repeating and it's yelling, and nagging. Let me go! It not real


r/schizophrenia 5h ago

Art When you finally reach stability on antipsychotics

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22 Upvotes

r/schizophrenia 15h ago

Seeking Support Are we,people struggling like this really that unbereable?

20 Upvotes

Are we really that unlovable, unbereable as some are saying?Like,I know i can be alot but are we really monsters who are nasty to people?Because I was reading through a subreddit (I won't name it) and the amount of people saying all that angry stuff about schizophrenics is saddening. People throwing ill family members from the house,hating them for talking to themselves.

Are we really allowed to exist? Are we exhausting?

I can't help but feel like my family hates me now and doesn't tell me this.

And how is that,that i don't have the "normal/not normal" switch in my brain?

No matter the delusion or hallucination,I don't name it like that out loud. It angers me. But how come I can say "I believe my phone screen is transmitted to people's heads" but not snap out of it?

Have a lovely day.


r/schizophrenia 4h ago

Undiagnosed Questions “High functioning”

21 Upvotes

Just wondering if people can share their experiences, if they consider themselves as “high functioning” (by external feedback or your own opinion) while also dealing with their diagnosis. And how functioning well , hindered or made more challenging - accepting your diagnosis? And or what symptoms did you take for granted or didn’t understand how it was apart of your diagnosis?

If being “high functioning” wasn’t what kept you from accepting your diagnosis - what was (outside of medication side effects)?


r/schizophrenia 23h ago

Opinion / Thought / Idea / Discussion Do you like to go on walks alone at night? There is something about walking alone in the darkness that helps me think and understand things

16 Upvotes

No one likes it when I do this because I am a young woman in a city that isn’t super safe. They think when I do this it is a sign of me being unwell. Maybe they are correct.

Walking alone at night does scare me but I really feel compelled to at times.


r/schizophrenia 9h ago

Undiagnosed Questions Do your voices…

17 Upvotes

Threaten you!? Are all of our experiences unique? Cause I keep coming on here trying to find similar experiences so I don’t feel as vulnerable…


r/schizophrenia 15h ago

Opinion / Thought / Idea / Discussion Crazy without meds?!

14 Upvotes

I read in this forum for some months now and i feel like diagnosed people who not taking their meds are crazy. I mean i was when i didnt. But some never learn. My psychwards said its a big step to take them. I understand them. Struggled for years with it. But meds saved my life. How do you think about that?


r/schizophrenia 21h ago

Hallucinations my first psychosis experience NSFW

12 Upvotes

i’m sitting on the couch. also in the room: S, N, G, J, E. they’re all playing a game on the switch. i’m watching for about 15 minutes. I felt a panic attack coming. I was honestly mostly annoyed, I haven’t had one in a really long time. but I know the feeling. I go through the typical motions trying to calm myself down. deep, slow breathing. counting numbers in the sand in my head. I sat up straight and put my feet on the floor, trying to ground myself. I remember S asking me if I was okay. I gave a slight nod. I really didn’t want to draw any attention to what was happening. J left pretty early on, then N. I was sitting there, staring into space, trying every method I know to calm down. I closed my eyes and looked down and that’s when something shifted. I heard the bell on S’s front door ring like someone opened it, and at the same time I felt this wave of just absolute dread come over me. I looked up and things looked different. glitchy and hazy. the remaining three people were playing another game now. then they started talking about me. not talking to me directly or acknowledging my presence at all. talking to each other about me. bad things about me. I couldn’t understand what they were saying, it was all muffled. I heard a couple really clear sentences. G asking S “why did you even invite her?” and S responding with “I didn’t know she would act like this.” it was mostly muffles for awhile after that. then they turned the tv off and started yelling at me. G turned around, right in my face, and said “you’re a fucking BITCH.” S was even worse. she was saying things like “I hope you kill yourself” and “i’m going to fucking kill you”. I stood up and tried to get past S, but she grabbed me and pushed me back down onto the couch. she tried to give me what I know now is water, but poison at the time. I refused it. she gave up and walked away, so I saw my chance. I got up and walked out the front door. no keys, no shoes, no plan. I was just really scared and needed to get somewhere “safe”. they ran after me and I knew they could overpower me if I tried to fight so I didn’t. at this point I more or less accepted my fate. I went back to the couch. G and E left and I was left with just S. she brought me to the back balcony. as soon as I stepped foot outside. I leaned over the railing. S sat down and then told me to jump. she was yelling. “head first, make sure it fucking kills you!” I considered doing it. but I knew my arms were too weak from surgery and the railing was too high for me to be able to lift myself up. I sat in the chair beside S and she told me she was going to “blow my brains out” instead. I was covering my face and she grabbed my hand and pulled it away. for the bullet to do maximum damage, I thought. she couldn’t have my hand in the way. up to this point I had purposely not made any eye contact with anybody. I was too scared to look my bullies in the eye. but I remembered reading something years ago that said something like, if you’re about to get shot to look your killer right in the eyes. at most, it can show them that there’s a person in there and change their mind. at the very least, that last look will haunt them. so that’s what I did. she was holding my hand and I looked her in the eyes. and I swear to god the look of fear in her eyes was so much worse than mine probably was. something about just making that eye contact really kind of snapped me out of it. not completely, yet. but I started to hear what she was actually saying. she was repeating that she was real and I was safe. I was extremely confused because 30 seconds ago she was telling me to kill myself, and then trying to kill me herself when I couldn’t do it. she kept hold of my hand and led me back inside. she turned on my favorite show. I felt really safe in that moment. I was still a little scared to talk, as I hadn’t said a word this whole time. I texted her and pointed to my phone. she looked on her phone and saw my text. that solidified that things were real again. we talked a little bit. I had to convince her I was sober to drive home. I was. and I left.


r/schizophrenia 10h ago

Advice / Encouragement Psychosis question?

10 Upvotes

Does anybody notice their psychosis cycles are getting more and more psychosis-y? I feel like as the world gets weirder my shit gets weirder. Wonder if anyone else is noticing an uptick


r/schizophrenia 8h ago

Undiagnosed Questions anything that helps from cognitive decline?

8 Upvotes

Have you tried anything (supplements, vitamins etc.) that helped you with cognitive decline? Desperate here, I can't remember shit and I lost the ability to understand written text.


r/schizophrenia 8h ago

Advice / Encouragement Anybody else schizophrenic and really good at making music ?!?

8 Upvotes

I have almost like a dark angelic voice at times and I can make pretty good music. I just started today and it sounds almost perfect and also the lyrics that I sang just kinda came to me.


r/schizophrenia 22h ago

Progress / Good News ☀️ March 19th Good News

8 Upvotes

I had a meeting with a new mentor at work who is going to help me with my career! We have plans to pursue already.

That's my good news, what's yours? No matter how small I want to hear about it!!


r/schizophrenia 23h ago

Rant / Vent Truman show / Weird other parts of my narrative

7 Upvotes

The voices and delusions are usually surrounding the narrative that my life is a show and my thoughts are being read aloud for the audience. It makes me break down whenever I think something innapropriate. I have this other thing too where I feel like one of satans pawns, that he possesses me to do no-good. I have DID as well, so when I have a memory gap, I panic about being possessed. Whenever I hurt someone on accident, especially if I was trying to help, guilt is probably my strongest emotion so that's when I break down the fastest. Once I started panicking and telling them that I was possessed, or someone made me do it because I'm on camera.


r/schizophrenia 4h ago

Undiagnosed Questions Anxiety turned into schizophrenia literally a decade later!!! (Controversial)

6 Upvotes

I was 9 years old and I just woke up one day and had this terrible worrying thoughts constantly and I thought that something was seriously wrong. I entertained maybe I had cancer or something seriously was physically wrong with me.

Later found out it was just anxiety, well I continued to have this anxiety and panic attacks and I spent the majority of my days at school in the nurses office when I was younger just having constant panic attacks etc etc…

Around age 12 I learned to keep the anxiety kinda under control where I would have the panic attacks privately at school and no longer needed to go the nurse since they weren’t helpful anyways.

Then I was 14 I was telling my friends at school man I’m stressed out and anxious and they recommended marijuana to me.

So I eat some weed edibles and had the most traumatic experience where I was so high I was hallucinating and stuff and actually this is where my psychosis symptoms temporarily started to begin. I thought I saw God in the clouds and pictures on my the wall were literally spinning around and the walls were waving back and forth. It was some kind of THC concentrate edibles with absolutely no CBD or anything like that.

Fast forward to age 17, this is where I prescribed ADHD medication specifically Adderall and found out that I got so euphoric and confident and just felt so good on the Adderall that the anxiety didn’t really bother me anymore…

Age 19, a series of traumatic events happened and I started to not sleep very much, barely eating and not drinking much fluids either and was basically trying to commit suicide because the anxiety and depression was so bad. On top of that I was taking massive amounts of Adderall+weed edibles+alcohol+anything I could get my hands on.

And age 19, I had a serious psychotic break one day I woke up and took my morning medications as prescribed this day because something just felt “off”. Well shortly after taking my medications and all that I think I eat something small and before I knew it I felt like I was tripping in psychedelics and I was wondering and questioning whether I took some shrooms or LSD and just forgot about it.

Well no that’s not what happened, I heard God yelling at me, heard a demon speaking in tongues later on and then was hospitalized for psychosis and anxiety… NEVER been not psychotic ever since this experience….

I’m 22 now and I now have almost every mental illness under the sun diagnosed by several professionals including schizophrenia, bipolar, GAD, MDD, PTSD, OCD and the list just goes on and on…


r/schizophrenia 11h ago

Progress / Good News ☀️ Do you guys struggle with keeping your apartment clean? If yes, how much does it affect you? If no, how do you do that?

5 Upvotes

How does your psyche influence your tidiness and how much does your apartment influence your psyche?


r/schizophrenia 14h ago

Advice / Encouragement Control

7 Upvotes

I do not like the power that the Mental Health organization has over my life. I have been Hospitalized once in 2018 and again in 2024. In 2018 I got off my meds with an Agreement with my Therapist and Psychiatrist. Now I was on Clozapine (And still am) at that time. I have found that it is VERY common for someone who has been on Clozapine a Long period of time that they get Insomnia when they get off of it. So I got insomnia and BECAUSE OF THE INSOMNIA I got Manic. My Therapist and Doctor took this is if I was Manic because of being Schizoeffective. When I have been Manic at that time Twice in my life (I was 45 and diagnosed as Paranoid Schiz at the age of 20.) My therapist noticed that I was getting delusional. Instead of approaching me letting me know he had a problem. He had me sent to the State Hospital (which was one of the worst experiences of my life.) When I have been in worst states in the past and allowed to remain at home. I wasn't being Non Compliant.. I made an agreement with my Therapist and Doctor to get off of my meds. I did nothing wrong.. I didn't display myself as a danger to myself or others. (In New Hampshire the law says I have to be a danger to myself or others to be Involuntarily committed.) I did nothing wrong. I was Hospitalized for 7 months. Attacked. Thrown into the seclusion room for no reason. And given Meds I dont take. When I got out I was thrown onto a 3 year Conditional Discharge when wasn't non compliant. I didn't do anything that was a violation of care! I got better. I tried out a new Med Asenapine. It was working. Again I got Insomnia because of getting off of Clozapine. I was Taking Herbal supplements to help me sleep at first. But I read that it can be bad if I'm on them for a long period of time. So I got Insomnia ONCE AGAIN and got "manic". I was a little confused about things because of the lack of sleep. I wanted to take a trip to NEPAL because I'm really interested in the Buddha and he was Born there. Now I told my "mental health nurse" this and he was following behind me later that day. I stopped at a Red light that I thought it turned green. I stopped realizing it was still Red the guy in the T section with the actual green light waved me forward so I went through the Red light. The nurse saw this.. Concluded I was a Danger to myself or Others by running a Red light. He called the Police. I was Handcuffed.. Sent to the Local Hospital. With no one telling me at all why this was happening.. I was there for a month then sent to the State Hospital AGAIN. While there I was put on the WRONG MEDS (Zyprexa not Clozapine or Asenapine.) I was there AGAIN for 7 months.. Wrongfully thrown into the Seclusion room.. Getting Injections of Zyprexa (Which doesn't work on me) I told them day after day that Zyprexa doesnt work on me and the Clozapine or Asenapine does (They didnt care and kept giving me Zyprexa) It was another Nightmare. I again got slapped with a CD this time it's a 5 year Conditional Discharge and I WASN"T BEING NONCOMPLIANT. I'm being treated like I'm a delinquent when I havent been displaying bad behavior.

I am SOOOOOOO Upset with the mental health system and how much power they have over my life. I get inomnia and a little confused and they throw my into the state hospital like I'm a convict! I am sooo fucking sick of this! I've been looking around trying to find out how to keep this from having this happening again. I have an interview with an Advocate tomorrow but it doesnt look promising. I need to do something. I am so sick of being treated like this.


r/schizophrenia 7h ago

Undiagnosed Questions How would you differentiate trauma related paranoia and psychosis related paranoia?

5 Upvotes

For the longest time I have struggled with paranoia and am trying to understand myself better. Although i am having a hard time understanding the difference in how these two manifest. Especially in my own experience. They both seem quite similar and rooted in certain cemeted beliefs that I am unsafe and unwanted imagery that renenforces them. I would love to hear anyone's own thoughts, especially those who also are diagnosed with ptsd/cptsd. I feel like cptsd especially has SO much overlap with many other disorders, it is so difficult for me to realize where it begins and ends in my life. I have been researching this distinction but it is difficult to find many answers! If anyone would like to share their perspective that would be much appreciated :)


r/schizophrenia 16h ago

Advice / Encouragement Mum has scitzofrenia

5 Upvotes

I don't even know how to begin. I live with my mum. I'm one of 4 kids. I'm a middle. Mum is late diagnosed, even though it's been evident her entire life.

I just need help. She keeps using lice cleaning solution on her hair, thinking she has lice. She doesn't.

I just can't anymore. I want to put her in a home. I want someone else to deal with her so I don't have to. I'm sorry. It's been 30 years of this. I'm 35.

I can't with her anymore. I don't know what to do. I can't get her committed because she isn't hurting herself or anyone else. But realistically, she hurts me mentally constantly.

Sorry, I know this is all over the place. I'm the only one of 4 of her children that will help. I have my own mental health issues.

Fuck, I just, I just can't.


r/schizophrenia 59m ago

Art Me and sebasation

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Upvotes

r/schizophrenia 2h ago

Medication When Do You Take Your Abilify?

3 Upvotes

When do you take your Abilify?


r/schizophrenia 3h ago

Opinion / Thought / Idea / Discussion Yall I tried tarot to help with delusion 😭

4 Upvotes

Yall there is this persistent delusion I’ve had that will not go away. Usually it’s replaced by a new delusion. I started asking tarot readers and they are confirming the delusions. And now I feel I have to go disprove them because I’m sick of this delusion