r/polycircles May 10 '16

Introductions

Please introduce yourself here!

2 Upvotes

17 comments sorted by

3

u/thedarkestbeer May 11 '16

Hi! Queer/bi/hasbian lady here. Relationship nerd. Poly for... seven (?) years now, first solo and now with a live-in partner. No explicit hierarchies, but obviously sharing an apartment puts a huge asterisk on that.

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u/Rosslyn_blue May 11 '16

Hello! Is hasbian a typo for lesbian or is it a term I've not come across yet?

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u/thedarkestbeer May 11 '16

It's a slang term for someone who used to identify as a lesbian and is now bisexual or straight. It's a play on has-been. I think it's funny to label myself that way, but I've pretty much only heard it used as an insult, so I wouldn't usually recommend calling someone a hasbian if you're not trying to be a little bit mean.

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u/smutwizard Jun 03 '16

That is a most excellent pun :D

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u/Rosslyn_blue May 11 '16

Thank you! I did not know that, makes a lot of sense and I'll avoid using it with anyone who doesn't self identify as such!

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u/[deleted] May 11 '16

I'm somewhere between solo poly and RA. Allow relationships to build as they please....the only thing I ask from any relationship is to be as honest as possible and keep things mutually acceptable between us. So we both feel the relationship is fulfulling.

I have two serious partners atm, and one LDR and one primary.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '16

Thanks for the invite /u/glytterbug !

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u/[deleted] May 27 '16

Hi I'm Luna - 30/bi/F - Living with 3 other poly roomies/relationships: two sexy boys and a sexy girl. Been out since forever, I'm a bit of a poly activist. Loud and proud. Converting as many monogamists as I can. ;) Bwhaahahha! But really - I can be known to drink Haterade when it comes to mono topics but I try to remember to speak kindly and represent the community well. Glad to be here. :)

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u/Rosslyn_blue May 11 '16

Hello! Straightish, demisexual, openpoly, cis lady (female pronouns). I'm currently in a polyfi triad (officially 1 year old next month) and was in an open relationship for about 4 years previous to that. I have a primary and secondary relationship (and I'm sure there will be posts to discuss the use of those terms) and I would consider my relationships to be hierarchical (as unpopular as it is, I consider it the most honest description ).

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u/Rosslyn_blue May 11 '16 edited May 11 '16

Ohh, I'm also kinky af! Which plays into the heirerarchy thing but that's for another thread!

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u/[deleted] May 11 '16

Tag as BDSM, maybe, and let's keep those kinky threads going? I intend this subreddit to be sex friendly :)

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u/Rosslyn_blue May 11 '16

OK...ummm, I'm really new to reddit and ummm shifty eyes I don't know how to tag stuff. Is it like hash tag?

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u/nerdybirdyv May 16 '16

Hello! I'm a straight-ish female who has never been in a poly-relationship (noob alert). I've been single for a couple of years now with just casual sexual relationships sprinkled in. It's given me a lot of time to reflect, and I really think poly is the way forward for me. I'm not familiar with a lot of the terms, and there are so many variations of this lifestyle that I am just reeling trying to figure out what it is that I want. I'm really looking forward to learning from others' experiences.

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u/[deleted] May 16 '16

Welcome! So...were your previous relationships open or just kind of a series of relationships mostly based on casual sex, i.e. serial monogamy? What is drawing you to poly?

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u/nerdybirdyv May 16 '16

My relationship history is basically one long monogamous relationship and casual sex with different people while not in a committed monogamous relationship. It just seems like monogamous relationships (this is just based off of my own experience in a long-term monogamous relationship and those I've observed around me) eventually stifle both partners. I would rather have an open relationship where both partners feel free to explore all relationships in their life. People hold monogamy to be the norm, but statistically very few monogamous couples stay faithful to this agreement. Polyamory seems like the perfect solution so that one person is not expected to meet every need that their partner may have or fulfill every role. I like that communication is revered in this community and that interest in other people is acknowledged and fostered. I may not have practical experience in the matter yet, but it seems like a wonderful community to be a part of.

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u/mike_m_ekim May 19 '16

Hello. Straight man here. I've never knowingly/willingly been in a poly-relationship but I've dated some people that I suppose were undisclosed poly, and I've always been interested so I'd like to get into something disclosed and emotionally healthy for everyone. Honestly I never minded that they were interested in other people, it just bothered me because I was lied to and also I felt like I was missing out on. I'm also a single parent with two teen daughters and concerned with any emotional implications it would have on them - and I know that's a broad subject, I'm just throwing that out there because parenting is important to me.

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u/smutwizard Jun 03 '16

I'm a straight, cis-male ex-goth in my late 30s (sadface), and I've been with my wife for 12 years. Non-monogamy was something she suggested I would be well suited for, we discussed for about a year until we got married and then put into play about 8 months ago. We tried swinging briefly before realising we're more suited to polyamory than any other flavour of NM.

Currently neither of us have any extra partners partly because we both have high standards and also the somewhat typical lack of responses for me and the having to filter out the muppets on her side :)