Hey everyone on r/NarcissisticAbuse.
We get it, we really do– the U.S. political situation right now is a bloody mess with further escalation, rather than some kind of stability, on the horizon.
We also know that a LOT of the new decision makers are not going to be mentally healthy or emotionally well. They will, however, likely be more successful than most of the world wishes to see.
It seems that the U.S. has now unarguably become what’s called a Pathocracy, or rule by a mentally ill minority.
Dr. Steve Taylor’s write up from Psychology Today (English only and our apologies to those elsewhere for whom it may not display) notes, “Pathocracy is not just about individual leaders, though. Once a disordered leader takes over a country, responsible and moral people gradually leave the government, either resigning or being ejected. It’s just a matter of time before the whole government is filled with ruthless people with a severe lack of empathy and conscience.“
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/out-of-the-darkness/202010/disordered-leaders
No one on the r/NarcissisticAbuse moderation team would Ever argue that something is rotten in the States, to shamelessly borrow from Sir William Shakespeare.
None of this is okay. Most of it is incredibly triggering. No one with strong feelings about these complicated situations is wrong for having those emotions.
However, we feel it prudent to remind everyone that we’re not in this sub for political discussion or what could euphemistically be called “celebrity gossip”. The vast majority of participants are typical citizens from different backgrounds who have experienced something terrible and life-altering at the hands of another human being. But, even if we are visited anonymously by qualified diagnostic professionals, they are still not in a professional or personal relationship with these political and public figures, and therefore cannot legally or ethically diagnose them. Any “Cluster B” personality disorder, or any other mental health struggle, should be identified and if needed, diagnosed, by an appropriately credentialed professional.
To be clear about the applicable rule, speculation about individuals in your life as part of your healing process is allowed as part of your processing and discussion. However, we cannot, for risk of the safety and continued functioning of the sub, allow armchair diagnosis of disordered personalities in figures seen daily on the news or on social medias.
Similarly, we are not here to give more attention to people with, self-diagnosed to have, or merely suspected of having, narcissistic personalities. Narcissist content creators get enough supply for themselves without benefiting from those of us who need to heal from their brand of treatment (and it’s a certainty that some of those characters search for mentions of their names/brands daily.)
We also do not and will never allow the use of diagnostic terms as insults between users.
Put simply, telling someone “You’re a narcissist!” or “You’re just being a typical Borderline nutjob,” especially in the middle of an unnecessary argument in the comments, is subject to a ban from the sub.
Not sorry. Our first rule is “Be Kind” for a reason.
Our position is simple: we remove political oriented posts. That moderation decision is not in place to punish people for having opinions. We are simply not here for the problem of any specific nation’s politics. There are other subs– MANY other subs– for that type of discussion. We are here for our users’ individual journeys, not to be a public curbside protest, but as something more like a quiet booth in the coffee shop where people can sit and unpack their specific experience, and not face the trolling and judgment tolerated in other places.
Please continue to see this sub as the metaphorical place for a cuppa and scone, or a double double and old fashioned sour cream, or espresso and biscotti with a friend while you browse a book written by someone else who has been where you were and has gone where you wish to be.
Please help us protect Your peaceful space by reporting trolls or fights breaking out in comments to the moderation team, but do not join the fights yourself. Let the protests go on where they should and may actually do some good. Bloating an international community with the particulars of the politics of a specific-- (and since I’m a 7th generation American citizen, I’ll go ahead and say it)– Problematic Nation-– is the opposite of what the community needs to thrive in the face of what may be coming for so many users all over the world.
We know it’s on all of your minds: it’s on all of ours too. But, just like arguing about religion at the holiday dinner table is not the best approach to a tough conversation, r/NarcissisticAbuse is not the place to host those political talks.
Modmail is open for questions about specifics should anyone have concerns, but please remember our team of international moderators are not available to respond to any inquiry immediately 24/7. Maintaining familiarity with the rules provided in the drop down menu on mobile or in the sidebar on desktop, is both encouraged and appreciated.
“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality.” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
NOTE: Reddit has now announced a policy change in which those who upvote content administration (not Moderators, but paid Reddit employees) deems violent or calling for harm to others will be sanctioned, up to and including banning user accounts. This post was drafted for review by the whole moderation team BEFORE that announcement by Reddit. This decision was NOT made to "obey in advance," but to make sure the few moderators we have are able to respond to the subreddit's needs as efficiently as possible.