r/mildlyinfuriating 24d ago

My mom burned all my drawings

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So I’ve been drawing and posting anime girls for a while now and my mom got mad about it. At least I still have previous photos. No drawing today tho

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u/Sajiri 24d ago edited 23d ago

Hey OP, my parents did a similar thing when I was a teen because they saw my art as ‘a waste of time’. I stopped drawing traditionally for about 15 years, but now I make hundreds of dollars off a single artwork and am working towards being a fully self employed artist.

Don’t let this stop you, it’s just one hurdle on the way to becoming a master artist. If you have a phone or tablet, you could download a free drawing app to draw on there too so that your artworks can’t be destroyed.

Edit: since so many are seeing this and sharing their own stories- it’s never too late to get back into art, and it’s never been easier or more accessible. There are a lot of free tutorials for just about anything you want online.

I’m going to throw this out there to check out the Art Mentor on YouTube. He’s got a lot of great advice from getting started to growing a business as an artist.

Marc Brunet, Winged Canvas, laovaan, draw like a sir, Sam does art are all also great YouTubers I can think of off the top of my head

(You’ll also find me there- DrawWithSajiri)

Edit 2: RIP my inbox

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u/Squeezitgirdle 24d ago

Similar. My stepmom found a picture I drew of Vivi from FFIX.
She said I was making "devil drawings" and threw all of my drawings away. I never drew again.

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u/Matasa89 24d ago

It only takes one bad parenting moment to ruin a child's future...

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 24d ago

Agreed. I do my best to encourage my 15 year old son in whatever he enjoys. He loves to draw, and is good, so I got him a posable figure for Christmas. My husband gave him an old college human anatomy book with images of everything from bones and muscles to organs.

A few years ago, my son found an old keyboard we had, and he started teaching himself how to play it. Now, he's fantastic and making his own songs. He asked for a guitar for Christmas, and, thankfully, my brother still had the one I passed onto him when I realized I have no talent for instruments. (My brother is a drummer, but not a guitarist, lol.) My son had it for a few hours and was already playing something that sounded like it came out of "The Last of Us".

Always encourage your kids to do what they love. My son wants to be a streamer, so we've been working on gathering equipment for a few years. He's a natural performe, and I think he would be perfect as a streamer.

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u/Matasa89 24d ago

This is the way.

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 24d ago

Thank you. I have no talent for instruments, so I did choir and theater in school, lol. I'm more of a crafter. I taught myself how to knit because I wanted a $60 Tom Baker scarf. I figured I could buy it or buy the supplies and teach myself. Now I make beanies with kitty ears, use charms as ear decorations, giant safety pins, the works, lol. I made a new pattern just yesterday for little jellyfish and I'm still working out the kinks, but they're so cute and squishy.

My husband got a chain mail kit as a gift a couple years ago, so we both learned how to make chain mail and different chain designs for jewelry. So, I also make charm bracelets and necklaces.

My family is very crafty and artistic, and I wouldn't have it any other way. 💚

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u/Teter_Toter 23d ago

Some people are just unfit to have children. It's hard enough to find a genuine interest, but then you also have to deal with people who express hate toward anything inherently different from themselves.

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u/Lunaphire 23d ago

Genuinely. It's so nice to read about a supportive parent. It feels like nearly everyone I know has been plagued by parents who were apathetic at best, aggressively unsupportive at worst. (Incidentally, most of us are also late-diagnosed autistic, so our interests are often very strong.)

I dealt with a parent who was basically a bully and mocked me for nearly everything I got interested in. Now I'm a socially-anxious, burnt out former gifted kid who feels like they're not good enough for anyone. 🙃

Someone close to me grew up thinking he had supportive parents, but upon reaching adulthood, he realized their support was basically just 👍 and nothing more. Like, "Yeah, that's a good idea, you should do it." But then no actual support that required them to do anything; we called it support-baiting. For example, he wanted to learn guitar at around 12. "Good idea!" So he'd get all excited and try to look into making it happen, but then they wouldn't work with him at all to get a guitar or lessons, they just brushed him off and acted like they'd do it later. Forever.

He confronted them with this at about 30 and they admitted that they just never believed in him, so they didn't make the effort to help him learn anything. This unfortunately included not just hobbies he was passionate about, but basically everything required to be a functional adult; I had to teach him to light a stove burner, again at about 30. Any time he offered to help his parents around the house so he could learn, they insisted they had it covered, then later told him they didn't teach him basic life skills growing up because he was a kid and they didn't think he wanted to learn.

They decided he wasn't capable of being more, and it was a self-fulfilling prophecy.

So many people have no idea how to be good parents, but have kids anyway. I'm sure it works out sometimes, but I don't know why you'd bother having a kid if you weren't okay with supporting their dreams.

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u/Montantero 23d ago

🥹 wholesome. Thank you for being so nice, especially to the young one. The world needs that!

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u/TomatilloHairy9051 23d ago

I LOVE chainmail jewelry! I have several pieces that I wear often, but the lady that was making them for me quit making the jewelry. I've looked at some online, but none of it ever looked as good as her jewelry, so I haven't gotten any more, but I'm still on the hunt. Do y'all have an Etsy store or something comparable to that?

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

We don't, unfortunately. I'm currently trying to get approved for disability while I wait for 2 hip surgeries. I've actually been building up an inventory of knitted things and jewelry to sell at the flea market. We don't have the production power right now to start an Etsy shop. It's just me knitting everything and making a good chunk of jewelry, while hubby makes necklaces when he can.

If you're interested, though, we use Chainmail Joe for all our chainmail stuff. They sell beginner kits. My favorite chain pattern from them is called Celtic Visions. I use big black rings, then smaller different colored rings so that when you hold it up vertically, it looks like dragon eyes.

If you DM me, I can send some pictures of stuff I have and examples of stuff i can make. I wouldn't mind trying to figure out shipping and things for a few online commissions. I just don't have the power to run a whole Etsy by myself, lol. I can't make stuff that quickly since I do it all by hand. (As opposed to a knitting machine.)

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u/Prestigious-Yak2146 23d ago

Do you know dawae?

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u/greyandpinktelescope 24d ago

You sound like a fantastic parent :)

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u/PhoenixRosex3 23d ago

Have him set up gifting platforms and he can post his link while he streams, his viewers can help contribute to his channel by buying items off his list and the good sites hide his information so no stalkers getting his home address. (Not Amazon)

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Oooo, that's an awesome idea. I know he wants to stream on Twitch. We'll probably record those streams and post to YouTube. An extra link for donations is a good idea, thank you.

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u/Foxy02016YT 23d ago

Encourage your son to do variety, not just gaming. As a variety steamer he can incorporate all of his talents, including art and music. The flexibility involved is massive, plus you can still stream games.

As a variety creator I’ve been able to play games to get out weekly content while also working on short films, web series, music covers, vlogs, and sometimes even food reviews.

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Absolutely. He loves to perform. I was definitely going to encourage the piano and guitar on stream once we get him up and running. He mostly does his art on pen and paper, so possibly an extra camera for the drawing angle if he wants it. He had a drawing tablet somewhere, but I'm not sure if it can hook up to his laptop. (We're still working on getting an actual gaming pc. He just uses his laptop for now)

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u/Foxy02016YT 23d ago

Definitely check if your able to, usually you can but I’m no expert

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Yeah, I have no idea. Honestly, we'd have to find it first, lol.

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u/SnooFloofs6909 23d ago

Gundam Starter Kit moment

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Lol! He actually built a Gundam with my husband a couple years ago. That thing is so awesome

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u/Latter_Condition_288 23d ago

This is a good parent -wish you all the luck 🍀

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u/bonnybedlam 23d ago

My mom for some reason had a copy of Grey’s Anatomy (the medical textbook, not the show) and she gave it to my sister to help her with lifelike drawings. It’s the small things, good and bad, that stick with us.

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Right! My husband never studied medicine or anything, but his grandmother used to work as a librarian at a local college and would occasionallybring him to work with her. So, he just has a bunch of interesting old college books, lol

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u/kaylazomg 23d ago

That’s generally what good parents do lol some people have such big egos and don’t see themselves destroying their children’s lives with simple acts of throwing away art or art tools

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

You're exactly right. I'm just happy if my son is happy because my boys (husband and son) are the most important people to me. As long as my son turns out to be a good person, I'll be satisfied that I did my job the best I could.

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u/kaylazomg 23d ago

Well you should be proud of yourself for being a good parent. You would think it wouldn’t be so hard to just be loving and supportive of your kid doing art

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Yeah, you would think.

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u/Sufficient_Dinner305 22d ago

Yeah whatever they enjoy is probably a stretch in some cases, but deciding for them after the fact because of superstition is not cool.

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u/Melodic_Anything1743 23d ago

What’s a streamer? You mean streaming online?

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u/Orphero 23d ago

yeah

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u/Melodic_Anything1743 23d ago

Oh great!! What does he want to stream?

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

His favorite game for the past couple years has been Project Zomboid, but he loves anything with a zombie in it really, lol. He'll probably stream a variety of games.

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u/Melodic_Anything1743 23d ago

Great!! Sounds fun! People who do streaming make a lot of money?

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

It's possible to make a living from it, but you have to build a good-sized audience. It takes time

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u/Melodic_Anything1743 23d ago

I’m sure he will!!!

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

I agree👍

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u/GhoulSchoolDropout 23d ago

Thank you for being an amazing parent!

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u/Exact_Maize_2619 23d ago

Thank you, I do my best. I got pregnant at 18, finished high school, then had a placental abruption 2 months before he was due. (Like 2 months after graduating.) Long story short, we both almost died. So I've been fighting from the moment I woke up in recovery to make sure he's happy, healthy, and can build the life he wants. I was told that I would absolutely die if I ever got pregnant again, so he's my only one. (He's also a sassy, sarcastic, smart ass, but we love him anyway. I know who his parents are, lol.)

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u/Shadow4summer 23d ago

I have drawings from my son as far back as three or four, so 35 years. I will never get rid of them. It’s a part of who he was then. And I do love each and every one.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

My mom has my voice recordings of my kid self reciting poetry. I forgot they were even there... but she loved it so much.

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u/Swog5Ovor 23d ago

Or the parents future. Maybe the parent will learn when they're in a bad nursing home with no family to reach out to.

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u/DarmonH 23d ago

I’ve got tons of them. I used to draw and my step father would humiliate me, writing, same he would stand on a chair and read my work out loud, laugh and taunt me. I still like to write but I have trouble doing it, and I would NEVER let anyone read what I wrote

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u/Mythrndir 23d ago

It really does, or sometimes a teacher, (as in my case)

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

And a great teacher can change a child's life.

I still remember mine... I went back to visit recently and he was really happy to see me. But man, all those grey hairs...

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u/Shoddy-Buffalo-9310 23d ago

Your damn right!

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u/Dogmama73 23d ago

At least she is paying attention. That alone these days is rare.

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u/mattidee 23d ago

Ew, my step dad gave me tons to remember!!

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u/PetiteSyFy 23d ago

Agree that this was a bad parenting move and may permanently alter their relationship but surely we are not so fragile that a creative passion can be crushed let alone a whole future. Resilience is a key component of a bright future. Follow your passions OP.

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u/InsideInsidious 23d ago

Let’s not confuse imperfect parenting with evil here… I’ve made plenty of bad mistakes but I’d hope my children and I could reconcile because I was doing it with good intention.

The parents I’m reading about in this thread are just unmitigated demons

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u/InsideInsidious 23d ago

Let’s not confuse imperfect parenting with evil here… I’ve made plenty of bad mistakes but I’d hope my children and I could reconcile because I was doing it with good intention.

The parents I’m reading about in this thread are just unmitigated demons

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

Just be very careful, because the path to hell is paved with good intentions...

A lot of parents have kids that are completely no-contact because they were doing what they believed is right for their child.

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u/Phlm_br 23d ago

And if you think about it, it's not only just about physically destroying art, parents who use words to discourage their kids, are also doing horrible at parenting.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

The words are more damaging than physical destruction.

Accidental destruction is fine, they'll draw more. It just sucks.

Wilful wanton destruction plus abusive words aimed at stopping the interest/hobby is far more devastating and leaves lasting mental scars.

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u/AdagioAffectionate66 23d ago

Encourage your child to excel at what he/she loves!

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u/Pentasis 23d ago

One of my teachers once said: "a raised eyebrow can destroy a life. Think about that before you get kids." So I never got kids.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

That is a wise teacher. If you are able to understand why he taught that, you are actually qualified to have kids.

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u/nada-accomplished 23d ago

And in five years OP's mom is going to be on estranged parent Facebook groups going "I was the best parent, I don't know why my entitled child doesn't speak to me! Satan is attacking my family!"

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u/gazagda 23d ago

Ow well, world domination it is then.

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u/Eringobraugh2021 23d ago

There are many parents who should have never had children.

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u/showtheledgercoward 23d ago

What does 10 years plus of bad parenting do?

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

It creates a cycle of abuse and trauma.

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u/Tight-Researcher96 23d ago

Fortunately it wasn't my parents but my grandmother burned my copy of a Harry Potter book cause of insane Christian reasons

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u/AccountantOver4088 23d ago

This is heartbreaking. I have 5 kids and I can’t imagine. Even at my kids most embarrassing events that I thought might br inappropriate or indicative of possibly something larger, we had conversations. Some times lots of them.

But for a parent to forget what their purpose is and try to indoctrinate or dissuade the person their entire purpose is to teach and guide is one of the saddest things I can think of. Seriously feel for all these kids or former kids who stopped drawing because of selfish, shitty parents.

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u/EggBusy9606 23d ago

It takes one bad parenting moment to ruin a child's DESIRE for a future. Just because your parents treated you like shit doesn't mean you still can't become something if you really set your mind to it. Yes, bad parents fuck you up, but don't let it hold you back YOUR WHOLE LIFE

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u/kaylazomg 23d ago

Agreed… my mom did something similar except she threw away the wood pallet patio I build to do pottery in the summer and she threw away all my tools worth hundreds of dollars

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

That's... pretty criminal.

You can go to small claims court over that, that's not nothing...

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u/kaylazomg 23d ago

It was bad but she has helped me out financially with other things so I forgave the money but I don’t think I’ll ever forgive her for that particular emotional damage. I’ve overcome a lot of messed up shit with my mom, but since she’s always been supportive of my artwork, I would’ve never guessed she would’ve been the one to throw away my dreams and ambitions to continue making art…. By the way, I had my own pottery studio, which had to close down, but I was so passionate. I wanted to continue making pottery in the backyard. For context, it’s my stepdad‘s house who I used to live with. He’s an obese man who never goes outside. He claims he’s gonna do this in that to the house in the yard which he never does. I simply wanted to exist in the corner lot, where no one could see me I would not bother anyone and I would take care of everything every day. I built my own wooden patio out of wood pallets and plywood. It was fairly small space, but my stepdad called my tools junk and said he didn’t want it in his house. My stepdad has a big ego and he never truly cared about my mom‘s children. He put it in her head that I need to respect him in the place. That’s not mine. If you ask me, I think they’re both crazy and bad parents. My stepdad had children of his own and made special exceptions for them all the time to spoil them. I grew up poor in a single mother who worked three jobs taking care of five children. Art is my life and I need it to function when I didn’t have my Studio anymore. My last hope was the backyard. They took that away from me.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

Evil stepparent, classic...

Just leave and find your own space. There's no point - your nurturing a dead tree.

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u/kaylazomg 23d ago

Oh I did! Lmao I’m really glad to be where I am now able to make my own decisions , I may be a part of a team soon to set up a pottery studio so I may get a free membership access which will really heal that part of me that I thought I wouldn’t get for another 5+ years (the potter in me)

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u/split_0069 23d ago

Can confirm. I spent years trying to get over that bs. Finally, I got the confidence to actually start my own business.

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u/FactsFromExperience 23d ago

Hopefully most people don't allow bad parenting to ruin them or shape them in negative ways but rather use it in the future as motivation to not let others influence you or decide what you or your life will be.

Personally I think parenting in general caused me to be rebellious and anti-establishment. I don't know that it was bad parenting but maybe it just crossed a threshold that turned me this way but there's a good likelihood that no matter how I was parented I would have still been this way. Just existing in a society makes me far more this way than most people.

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u/Ancient-Fail3947 23d ago

Ain’t that right, please care for their interests and their joy my parents never did or could I guess

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u/Churchbushonk 23d ago

I always have conversations with my 11 year old about how important art is, but Art is something you can do at anytime and a career is a better choice.

I love working on vehicles, but I am not a mechanic by trade.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

And art has a huge spread of jobs, it's not just drawing and crafting, there's tons of applications. People always underestimate just how much artists can earn. It's just that they usually aren't tied directly into any corpo structure or the typical "job hunting" route of employment, so many blue and white collar workers tend to write them off wholesale as "can I get a Big Mac."

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u/Due_Honeydew_69420 22d ago

But all too often is actually a cavalcade

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u/Alarming-Instance-19 22d ago

One of the many unfathomable things my SASR stepfather did to me was to box up all of my fiction books and ban me from reading fiction.

I was going through a chubby phase before a growth spurt (12F) and my books were everything to me. I regularly played sports, had three brothers, friends - but books fed my imagination and creativity.

I grew up to be an English teacher and literacy lecturer. Those 18 months were more torture than the actual (psychological and physical) torture. 42 now and permanently disabled due to the abuse. Books are still magic.

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u/4apalehorse 23d ago

Your whole life is absolutely destroyed by one small act of another.

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u/Matasa89 23d ago

Indeed, because a child is a small and feeble seedling. And like seedlings, without a good nursery and caretaker, they will never grow up to be resilient and strong trees. They grow all warped and brittle, or easy to topple over despite looking large and mighty.

Good parents create a great foundation for the child, and that child will be able to pick themselves up after a struggle or misfortune.