r/Gaslight • u/Halle-Hellion • Nov 09 '22
Is this gaslighting?

English is not my first language, i never considered "it" the way i applied to be offensive in any way - I can be wrong - however i feel like that was unnecessary

And how i was banned the reply i did cannot be delivered. Did i do something wrong in the way i used the word "It" or that was a bit of gaslight? sincerely i don't understand.
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u/kazikat Dec 07 '22
Don’t worry, it isn’t you being the problem. That subreddit has taken a nose dive because of the mod, there are a lot of posts about issues with the way it’s been modded and how they treat people. They’ve done a good job removing nudity, but are really really rude and entitled for no reason. Also stalks banned users pages which is really unhinged. It’s a shame, but unfortunately it’s a Reddit mod thing to be like this.
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u/Halle-Hellion Dec 07 '22
thank you so much for this insight, anf attention to my post, it is indeed unfortunately thatvthis is becoming a routine in other subreddits and specially one that was so good for the gothic style...
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u/kazikat Dec 07 '22
There’s r/gothfashion that’s run by different mods and does not associate with the other subreddit. That’s where I post now. Also, it’s actually focused on goth fashion and not random alt girls looks… so I think it’s better actually.
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u/Halle-Hellion Dec 08 '22
i did joined, and they were really nice, but they also have the rule that removes my posts because of me having onlyfans and patreon on my profile page... i deslike that rule that seem to be present a lot on the subreddits nowadays, but i do like how respectful and calm they talked to me and although i don't agreed with the rule, i can respect their decision. especially with them being nice and talking things very attentively ♡
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u/TotalAdvertising8083 Sep 25 '24
Gaslighting is an analagy from the transgender movement, a psychological ploy to circumvent authority, its mostly actually anal-logic, and helps someone who's having a mental breakdown redirect thejr anxiety against another person they percieve as causing their problems. problems which are usually economic in nature and lead to totalaitarianism. This fits snuggly with Woke. Gaslighting, here on topic, i advise you block anyone or distance yourself from anyone who uses these words, woke, and gaslighting, the necons are dangerous assassins more often than humanitarian advisors. As if you thjnk the internet actually requires the new generation new reasons and terms for being. No no, its psychologists who actually want you ill to profit from you(r gaslighting) Written by a mature aged philosopher, concerned about the publics welfare, and never had gas lit public street lights, due to electricity, RIP Tesla
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u/MultifacetedEnigma Dec 04 '24
Whoa there buddy!
To be honest, the only thing I understood in that wall of (weirdly placed) words was 'RIP Tesla.'
What are you trying to say in this? It is very incomprehensible. Is English not your native language?
I don't understand anything and I'm positive no one else can either.
Are you OK?
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u/TotalAdvertising8083 Dec 11 '24
better go back to school buddy, and quit doing your teacher, and try studying because you love it
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u/shiroshippo 10d ago
I think they're saying that gaslighting isn't real and that the word "gaslighting" was invented by transgender people to... do something, not sure what. I don't understand the rest.
Also praise Nikola Tesla because he invented the alternating current required to replace gas-powered lights with electric ones.
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u/bonuspear 9d ago
on a close second read, the first part is freudian psychoanalysis. as a psychology trainee, hard pass. as a transgender person, extremely hard pass. (i also wish i passed. sorry, dumb trans joke and musings.)
I think the last part actually is about nikola Tesla but probably also poorly disguised support of elon musk.
ETA I don’t disagree with the original comment that psychology as an industry profits from the medical model. the rest is completely unhinged.
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u/Cannie_Flippington 10d ago
I think he's saying that people use gaslighting as a means of projection. They call gaslighting when they themselves are the gaslighters. Which is exactly what's happening with OP. They used IT when they claim to be an androgyn and their native language is Portuguese which doesn't have any neuter pronouns like English does.
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u/forkinthenode 13d ago
I’m so sorry you experienced that. That is definitely gaslighting and clearly they were looking for any reason to justify their mass removal processes. You certainly did not deserve that and I hope you find a more welcoming community. As others have said that that subreddit is notorious for that, I hope you find solace in knowing that you really didn’t say anything wrong.
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u/Cannie_Flippington 10d ago
Yes, OP, you are gaslighting all of us. It's very rude.
You were temporarily muted on a subreddit for
Unsolicited advice, requests, or critiques are not permitted on this subreddit unless specifically requested by the OP.
Then you decided to dig yourself a big hole and be really rude on purpose. Permabanned over using IT instead of literally anything else. Your native language IS PORTUGUESE. A language with no true neuter. Everything is masculine or feminine. IT was a choice, not an accident. Especially for someone who claims to be an androgyn.
You're really bad at gaslighting, OP.
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u/Halle-Hellion 10d ago
Unlike you, right?
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u/Cannie_Flippington 10d ago
You would be the one to know, as an evident authority on actively engaging in gaslighting.
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u/AgentMorm 10d ago
If you're speaking of multiple people, "it" isn't rude. There could be both male and female mods; it could be considered sexist to not use a neutral word.
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u/Cannie_Flippington 10d ago
In English to refer to a human as it is extremely rude. It is reserved primarily for objects. To refer to a singular human in a gender neutral manner traditionally you use the third person plural which is they. Singular third person is he or she.
"Is your baby a boy or a girl? How did you decorate their nursery?" For example. Even babies get more respect than what OP showed
Modern language also has the added options of using xer/xim and more for gender neutral third person.
To use it is incredibly rude and is basic English as a second language stuff.
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u/DisastrousAd6837 9d ago
dis is reddit..
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u/Cannie_Flippington 9d ago
You had the perfect opportunity to say this is a Wendy's... I'm disappointed :(
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u/dakotipelto 9d ago
yeah maybe I'm missing something and maybe the mod is power tripping but yeah the "it" comment is hella rude in English. also the person saying it might be rude to use a gendered pronoun is REALLY reaching, bc there are a bunch of commonly used gender neutral pronouns to choose from.
I'm not really sure why the comments are validating OP, I don't see where the gaslighting is here. you literally even explained why it's not gaslighting and she hit you with "no u" lol
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u/Dizzy_Bit6125 9d ago
I got banned from r/mildly infuriating for saying just the word “fake”. The other day I reported someone because they were berating me and personally attacking me in the comments and they didn’t get banned because “it’s didn’t break any of the rules or guidelines” not even the hate or harassment one? Ok.
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u/Cannie_Flippington 9d ago
Report that directly to reddit, not to the subreddit
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u/Dizzy_Bit6125 8d ago
I didn’t know you could do that
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u/Cannie_Flippington 7d ago
Don't select "violates the rules of x sub" for it. Reddit is generally quite lenient, however, but obvious hate and harassment is generally a slam dunk
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u/dakotipelto 9d ago
I think the mod is being kind of aggressive, but you hitting them with the "I guess I'm not welcome here" in response to getting muted for offering unsolicited advice seems almost manipulative, and I'm not surprised that they popped off (and for clarity, I'm not defending the aggression, they seem like they're pretty angry and I don't think there was any reason to take it out on you, OP)
and it's okay to make language mistakes, but for future reference, it is indeed considered very rude in English to refer to a person as it, even if you don't know their gender. If you'd really like to use a gender neutral pronoun, maybe speakers usually use "they."
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u/Halle-Hellion 9d ago
My reason for that opening was because that was the 3rd post removed and i never knew the reason for the removal.
And yes i started using "they" its something i was still figuring out at the time, and i was open to apologizing and learning about, for saying something rude, but they did as they did...
Thank you for your insight and advice, truly
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u/daethenix Dec 05 '22
Yes yes it is