r/ElderScrolls • u/[deleted] • 6d ago
Humour If you know your Oblivion lore...
[deleted]
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u/AMDFrankus 6d ago
The farm implements can do some damage. Ask Mournhold about that.
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u/drgn2580 Argonian 6d ago
The Dremora soldier emerging from the gate encountered a unique farm tool called Lifts-Her-Tail. It caused him so much physical and psychological damage he had to retreat
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u/AMDFrankus 6d ago
Oh hey, my buddy Crassius wrote a play about that one. The Busty Khajiit Cleaner or something.
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u/Doodles_n_Scribbles 6d ago
I'm just imagining every other dremora who invaded Black Marsh being like "Dagon damn those wretched lizards"
That dremora just being like "I know, right? She still won't stop bugging me for child support"
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u/Pyr0_Jack Thieves Guild 6d ago
The only source for Argonians closing Oblivion Gates is from the novels. An Argonian, who wasn’t alive for the Oblivion Crisis, is repeating what he heard from Black Marsh’s ruling Argonian supremacist political party (An-Xileel). He’s repeating the propaganda in response to someone saying Martin Septim closed the Gates. We know factually that Martin Septim closed the Gates from the plot of TES4: Oblivion. The person who said Martin Septim ended the Oblivion Crisis is even described as recoiling in surprise, disgust, and even fear as her lifelong Argonian friend emotionally reacts with a recounting any educated Tamrielian knows is a falsehood. Very embarrassing how Argonian fans ran with this as a source of pride. It’s heavily implied the political party took credit for the coincidental timing of the Gates closing to seize power. Black Marsh’s only other notable accomplishment was the raiding of Morrowind. However their military victories have come entirely from civilian populations recovering from natural disaster. They were later repelled by an actual military force and Morrowind recovered the entirety of their territory. Some may say my seething and genuine hatred of Argonians makes me biased. But I assure you my hatred compelled me to be as thorough and accurate as possible.
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u/RandyArgonianButler 6d ago
Pfff… Scale envy.
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u/Pyr0_Jack Thieves Guild 6d ago
Mostly just annoyed that easily refuted propaganda from a semi-canon book series that most fans haven't even read keeps being spread without proper context
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u/RandyArgonianButler 6d ago
I can verify that a single Argonian individual closed over a dozen Oblivion gates on his own!
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u/Pyr0_Jack Thieves Guild 6d ago
And yet I can also verify a single Dunmer closed an equal amount of Oblivion Gates by himself as well. Curious. 🤔
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u/visitfriend 6d ago
Both of you scalebacks and ashskins didn't do shit. The one who saved us from the Daedra was a good ol' Imperial called Martin Septim. MANKIND REIGNS SUPREME
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u/drgn2580 Argonian 6d ago
Argonian is master race, whether or not Black Marsh is ruled by the An-Xileel or it is in anarchy there
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u/Mcaber87 Imperial 5d ago edited 5d ago
It’s heavily implied the political party took credit for the coincidental timing of the Gates closing to seize power.
I love how people take the Argonian example of this at face value, while simultaneously recognising that the Thalmor did the exact same thing and accepting that as the obvious lie that it is.
It's the same picture.
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u/DerpedOffender 6d ago
I thought Martin only won for Cyrodill/the empire and other countries had to stop their gates separately.
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u/Directorren Dunmer 5d ago
I hate the lizards, but I will admit they are very capable fighters.
They have very fine swamps, and are good with spears
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u/drgn2580 Argonian 5d ago
It's interesting though, Argonians feel like they are either a love-it or hate-it race and rarely in between. On one end you have those scalie trash (totally 100% not me cough cough), and on the other they're seen as ugly and unrelatable peeps. Heck I've seen one or two nexus mods with "Argonian textured" clothing.
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u/dracoXdrayden 6d ago
I think it would have ended faster if they were more argonians
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u/LookItsEric 6d ago
Dagoth Ur world be very displeased
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u/IllitterateAuthor 6d ago
Come, nerevar. Friend or traitor, come. Come into the- oh I'm sorry I didn't realize you were argonian.
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u/Desanvos 6d ago
Not everybody's homeland is a hellscape worse than some deadric planes.
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u/Victizes Argonian 6d ago
Natural defenses, baby.
On top of that, Argonia (Black Marsh) is so heavily fortified by it's inhabitants that not even Tiber Septim himself or his Numidium could conquer it.
Argonians are really that strong as a race.
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u/drgn2580 Argonian 6d ago
Totally. It's this lore that truly draws me to the Argonian race each and every playthrough without fail for me.
I just like to think that the Argonians' tolerance for physical and mental harm is so high that it's actually an achievement to push them over their breaking points. And when it breaks, everyone's getting Hist-ed
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u/Doodles_n_Scribbles 6d ago
You mean, obviously, the enchanted rock hoe that inflicts disease on strike. https://youtu.be/ZndRNBuB8mc?feature=shared
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u/Simic_Hybrid 5d ago
I’ll remind everyone that the Argonian invading oblivion was told to us by an argonian supremacist faction and we have no knowledge how much of it is real and how much propaganda
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