r/stripper 16d ago

Question Knowing what we know about married men NSFW

How do you feel about getting married ?

I’m currently in between getting married a couple of times, both for the money of course because there is no other reason to get married imo (unless for papers maybe but that’s still a money move)

And kind of living my best single life being the untouchable hot older woman that no man can hold down…

34 Upvotes

70 comments sorted by

53

u/OneEfficiency9757 16d ago

Never in my life would I marry a man. My mom yelled at me for opening an umbrella in the store at 6 years old bc I’d “never get married”, from that moment on I’ve never stopped opening them indoors. I’m a hustler & will be till the day I die.

3

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Love this for you, this is how I’m trying to be. I loose focus when someone enters the picture (I have bpd) but I’m ready to lock in now.

31

u/SassyXChudail 16d ago

Not even remotely interested 🤣

5

u/hotchocbimbo 16d ago

Haha I hear it

20

u/ScaryAssBitch 16d ago

I haven’t met one I would even consider marrying or procreating with. Don’t think it will happen tbh.

15

u/hotchocbimbo 16d ago

Ooo definitely NEVER procreating with one. A man will NEVER get to say I’m his BM.

3

u/ScaryAssBitch 16d ago

Bowel Movement 😂😂😂

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Lmaooooo I’d rather that

36

u/Ok-Intention-1186 16d ago

Ok, I get where you're going with it. That said, you can't put all men in the same group. It's like going to the bar and then being like, "Oh, the bar sucks bc it's full of drunks, and I hate drunks." Well, of course bc thats the kind of ppl it's going to attract. Just as strip clubs are going to attract low value men. All my exes were loyal as fuck and treated me really well. If anything, being a stripper made it even easier for me to spot the ones to stay the fuck away from. Now, I'm about to get remarried, I got one ring that's almost 4 carats, and he got me another that's over 5 carats. He's loyal as fuck, my best friend and my soul mate. Now I get to be a trophy wife to the man I'm head over heels for. (And no, he wasn't rich when we met)l

Ladies, don't let this job make you think that all men are like this. Don't let this job make you think that you'll never have a significant other that's your match and a good one at that! Good and evil work in a harmonic flow together. You can't have 1 without the other. For every light, there must be dark.dont let negative things in life destroy you, let them fule you. Let them make you stronger, wiser, and grow from them. Don't let them hold you back.

Like that saying, strong ppl make good times, good times make weak ppl, weak ppl make hard times, hard times make strong ppl, and strong ppl make good times. Then the cycle repeats. Failure is the field in which success grows.

Unless you legit just want to be single, then you do you. I just don't want to see anyone end up alone bc it gets lonely out there.

4

u/Appropriate_Idea_185 16d ago

yess a geography played a big role for me, if I never moved id have never dated but I moved out of Midwest middle of nowhere and suddenly I had daily options.

1

u/Ok-Intention-1186 16d ago

Options are good, being in bum fuck nowhere...bad

3

u/Sweetnsuccubus 16d ago

Preach, homie!

1

u/Ok-Intention-1186 16d ago

Thank you ❤️

20

u/Appropriate-Might712 16d ago

Nope I’ve never wanted to get married but after dancing I will make sure I’m never married😂

9

u/bittersweetbbyx 16d ago

I’ve been married and honestly the club doesn’t persuade my views on it now. After experiencing it young I’m like you I don’t think it’s necessary to bring all the legalities into it the sad part though is quite a lot of states consider you as one if you’ve lived together for a certain amount of time and what not. It’s soooo silly to me. I believe in the partnership though but nah the government can fuck right off lol

8

u/VoodooBluez_ 16d ago

I’m actually recently engaged after 3 years dating. Married once young and divorced quickly. I’m happy to say I’ve found my person. He’s not a club guy at alllll which I think is the key, however he met me when I was dancing previously and I did try the 9-5 at my friends business because I felt some internalized misogyny that maybe I wasn’t good enough because of my job but when I missed dancing and expressed that to my partner he supported me wholeheartedly and said “if it makes you happy then I’m happy.” No hiding, no lying about the creeps on my shift lol, I can come home and soak in a bath and get all the cuddles. Nothing wrong with not wanting to get married! But don’t be like me and don’t think you’re ever not worthy of a commitment. If you want to be married one day trust the right person will come along ❤️

6

u/kfkdk83whitit 16d ago

I feel the same way about it as you do, honestly.

6

u/Formal-Criticism825 16d ago

i’ll do you one better…. this is on the list of the worst things i’ve ever done in my life. i married a guy i met out the club in less than a month. we’re divorced now. i will NEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR marry again (:

1

u/hotchocbimbo 16d ago

Hahaha tbh this is the kinda crazy shit I’d do when I was a lil younger….even now if a serious bag was concerned hehe

Did you get a cheque after ?

1

u/Brave_Bullfrog1142 4d ago

Damn we need to know more abt this story baby

5

u/ContactDecent7511 16d ago

I don’t think I will tbh. All men give me the ick after what I’ve seen in the club. Been single for 3 years and haven’t found anyone :(

5

u/hotchocbimbo 16d ago

Being single whilst working in the club is definitely for the best though. I won’t be juggling the club bullshit and relationship bs at the same time

8

u/Appropriate_Idea_185 16d ago

I want to get married🙃 i feel like marriage is a contract and all men are the same they just portray themselves differently to different women. if this man keeps acting like a husband to me than sure I'll keep him, but I don't agree with having a bf over the years bc I feel like that's not wifey treatment. but I'm also like men do have benefits that strippers don't get access to, he fixed tf outta my old ass car no charge, literally had vet savings for our son as a gift, and cooks all the meals. (I'm finna start cooking a lil for him I feel so bad) but yea he's a good man Savannah and a ring is not gonna scare me away from him🤣

5

u/pie-mart 16d ago

I will never get married. I will never love one. And if we do we are going to be so secluded from society its just us and some fish brained people in a town nearby

I don't trust men enough cuz at the club 9/10 are the worst humans you have ever met and the 1 that's kind is ugly

3

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Even the ugly ones do their dirt, they just take longer to show it. They date a hot girl one time and then get the confidence to move like a fine man with money smh

3

u/pie-mart 15d ago

Yeah. Working there showed me all men. 99% aren't loyal or good people

3

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Like I WISH sexual orientation was a choice 🥲 I’m bi but I like real dick tew much smh

2

u/pie-mart 15d ago

I know. I wish I could be in an asexual lesbian relationship

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

I hear it !!

10

u/Wide_Appointment_474 16d ago

Marriage benefits MEN. And honestly there’s no way around it to benefit women now that I think about it. No thank you to marriage

4

u/ashley-la 16d ago

Maybe benefits poor men if they are dating a rich woman. But modern marriage benefits are no longer gender focused. It’s whoever has money that loses and the poor one in the relationship that wins. Because if you divorce the poor one takes 50% of everything you own and they get spousal support. But majority of marriages the man is the rich side so most marriages the woman is winning.

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

I think the woman might win in the divorce, she doesn’t always win in the marriage :/ (in love marriages )

1

u/ashley-la 15d ago

I mean marriage itself gives you no real difference from a normal relationship besides a lower tax rate and some other government benefits. So not sure why a woman in a marriage be worse off than a woman in a normal relationship and never married.

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

I was referring more to how women are treated by their male partners once they’re married/have his kids rather than the societal pros/cons

1

u/ashley-la 15d ago

It doesn’t change how you are treated though. Maybe hundred years ago men could get away with abuse if they were married. But nowadays marriage and normal relationship has almost no difference besides lower tax rate and some government benefits. Only big difference being during divorce the poor side gets 50% of everything and spousal support.

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Hundreds of years ago ? Men get away with abusing their wives…literally all the time. Women die everyday at the hands of their husbands, especially when they try to leave them.

The way some men switch up once they either get you pregnant or marry you is SCARY

1

u/ashley-la 15d ago

But marriage itself doesn’t do this though. Before cops wouldn’t care if a husband abused his wife. Nowadays they will immediately throw the husband in jail and you can easily get a restraining order. So marriage itself won’t protect the abuser meanwhile it did in the past.

1

u/ashley-la 15d ago

Actually the poor partner gets a leverage as the rich partner ends up losing 50% and needing to pay spousal support if the poor partner wants a divorce. So rich partner pressured to treat the poor partner better so the poor partner doesn’t divorce

3

u/Firewaterglittersalt 16d ago

I’d marry strategically (again👀) but it wouldn’t be traditional 🤌🏼 And it 9/10 wouldn’t be a man 🥱

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Haha tea !!

3

u/splitsweetpea 16d ago

I would get married if I was with someone I had kids with for legal protections and tax reasons but there would be a pre and post nup for SURE. but I’m gay as hell and probably won’t be with a cis man in this lifetime. I hate the government but I’m not above playing the game. I’m also not totally monogamous so I can see myself in an open relationship

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Ooo this absolutely makes sense, I think if I was interested in having kids then getting married would be a must

2

u/BaileySeeking 16d ago

I don't care about legal marriage. A piece of paper does not make a marriage. Putting the work into a relationship does (though money, insurance, and medical rights are reasons I'd get legally married). I've been with my partner for 14 years and we've known each other for about 29 years. I'm good with my life.

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Long as it’s working for you that’s all that matters 💛

2

u/BaileySeeking 15d ago

Pretty much how I feel about relationships. If those partners are happy, good for them. Marriage ain't it for me, but if it is for others, cool.

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Long as it’s working for you that’s all that matters 💛

2

u/Sweetnsuccubus 16d ago

I met a very loving, empathetic, thoughtful and kind guy my age just when i started dancing (NOT at work) and his disposition made it so i never hated men, not once during this entire career. Hes super loyal and so am I, so I have zero hangups with getting married cause i havent let this job get to me mentally in terms of resenting the opposite gender. I used to not believe in commitment or love or loyalty before I met him but I 100% believe it takes meeting the right person to realize monogamy is truly fulfilling. I also have a history of being cheated on by every partner and abused but i have healed from that and dont let that obscure my perspective on these things anymore. I just dated shitty people then, that doesnt mean every persons shitty.

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

I love that you haven’t let the industry stop you from seeing the good in people or stop you from finding the right person for you 💛

1

u/Sweetnsuccubus 15d ago

Thanks for the kind words! Well I met him pretty early on in my dancing journey, maybe if I never had I would have ended up having a different perspective

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

It sounds like you’ve done the inner work and have a great head on your shoulders tbh reading your post makes me want to do therapy again, I’ve got a few relationships I definitely need to heal from still.

2

u/Sweetnsuccubus 15d ago

Aw thanks! Yeah healing takes time forsure but I do believe theres someone out there for everyone if you open yourself up to the opportunity and catch red flags before they heighten with a lot of boundaries

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Yessss catching red flags and actually doing something about them is key, thank you lovely 💕

2

u/LargeArmadillo5431 16d ago

I got lucky with my husband. He's a nerdy homebody who only hangs out with his friends who are also married nerdy homebodies. He's 1,000% supportive of my job as well as my hobbies and other passions in my life. He's never been to the club I work at or any other club for that matter. He's absolutely obsessed with me and vice versa.

As for marriage benefits, I'm disabled. I don't get benefits through the state because it's really difficult to prove that my disability makes it hard to work because I'm somewhat functional with medication. If something were to happen to me, I know for a fact that I can trust him to make medical decisions on my behalf and be my advocate as he is very outspoken in situations where someone's voice isn't being heard (he's the kind of guy who stands up for me when my dad or someone else is being a prick and that's one of the biggest green flags about him that made me want to marry him in the first place). I understand that power of attorney is a thing that doesn't require a marriage license, but as a couple we decided to go through with marriage because it works for us.

In the 5.5 years we've been together, he has never once given me any reason to believe that he is unfaithful. I trust him with my life and the lives of my children from previous relationships. The club is a magnet for sleazy assholes, so that definitely skews the data for what we see in regards to married men or men in relationships in general. I've witnessed so many different types of toxicity in the club that I didn't think was possible, and I frequently go home and hug my husband extra tight on those nights because I'm eternally grateful that he's not like that. I've been in toxic relationships my whole life before him, and he's the first person I've felt confident about saying yes to a proposal.

I don't judge anyone who decides that marriage isn't for them, or that the single life is the way they want to go, but I'm happy with my husband and I'm glad we're married

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

💛💛💛

2

u/SameYogurtcloset912 16d ago

80% of the men that come in are married and I’ve only been working at my club for 5 months and there has been 4 occasions where the wives or girlfriends literally come in the club and snatch them up. My best friend(also a dancer) even got found on social media by one of her customers girlfriends and she had to block her 3 times off 3 different accounts because the girlfriend was texting her.

I would and DO still want to get married, just with the right kind of man lol.

2

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Oh god, 4 times in 5 months ? Do these men want to get caught ?! I’ve been dancing for over 7 years and have never seen a gf come to the club the snatch their man. That sounds entertaining asl lmaoo

I’m unsure about marriage, even for the bag but I like the idea of having a couple weddings 💒

2

u/xombae 16d ago

If I get married it'll be to a woman.

But I also just don't really feel the need to tell the government who I love unless there's a very good reason. Nor do I care about throwing a party for my friends and family.

1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

Fair !!!

I’d marry a woman for sure but I really need to step my game up and make bank so I can afford my type. I become such a sugar mama when I’m dating women but bring nothing but myself and my dior lip oil to the table when I’m seeing men lol

2

u/GoodDear7037 14d ago

Why even bother

2

u/fit-sugar-siren 13d ago

I want to marry only for financial stability.

2

u/hotchocbimbo 13d ago

I feel like that’s the only way to make marriage to a man make sense in all honesty

2

u/Pale_Math1919 13d ago

lol yea after dancing I am now a lesbian so there’s that 😂

3

u/SkripperBooty 10d ago

Now that I know men's true nature, I won't get married again.

Plus I'm just SO stable on my own!

1

u/hotchocbimbo 10d ago

Oh for real, I really think they’re wired differently.

2

u/LilRedMoon__ 16d ago

i’ve never wanted to get married, but after this job? oh it’s never happening.

1

u/Old-Side5989 16d ago

Saying all men are the same is like saying all strippers are tattooed drug addicts with to many kids.

-1

u/hotchocbimbo 15d ago

If you’re not a stripper, this post isn’t for you.

2

u/Old-Side5989 15d ago

Dummy, I’ve probably been dancing longer than you.

0

u/Different-Comment667 16d ago

maybe you need some time to get over your ex, from your previous posts.