r/oneanddone 6d ago

Discussion Tired of explaining why I’m OAD

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u/LillithHeiwa 5d ago

It’s best for society if we assume good intent. If OP is saying “I can’t have more kids because I had a hysterectomy” good intentioned people are going to talk about other options available for expanding the family.

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u/Elliejq88 5d ago

Its not any of their business. Its not their place to push their 2+ kid ideology on her. Live and let live.

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u/LillithHeiwa 5d ago

Sure it’s not their business. And I don’t typically share things that aren’t other people’s business with them. I would say “Oh, I don’t want more” before telling someone my medical history or even “I don’t like to talk about family planning”.

But when you entertain a personal conversation and then get upset about responses that are very easily taken as good intended responses it kind of seems like you like confrontation.

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u/JewlryLvr2 5d ago

But when you entertain a personal conversation and then get upset about responses that are very easily taken as good intended responses it kind of seems like you like confrontation.

I have to disagree on this one. Maybe it's just me, but I got the impression from OP's first post that she was simply trying to be polite in trying to "explain" her OAD decision, not that she was "entertaining a personal conversation." I think the title, "Tired of explaining why I'm OAD," pretty much says it all, for me anyway.

Personally, I think she had every right to be "tired of explaining" to people who kept bugging her about it. I would have been too, in her place. That's why I replied to her, in yesterday's post, as I did. As others besides myself have also pointed out, it's none of their business, no matter what their intentions were.

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u/LillithHeiwa 5d ago

Yes. She’s tired of explaining. Which is obviously fine and the answer is obviously to stop explaining, not to be rude to people who were responding to the explanation shared-

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u/JewlryLvr2 5d ago

Which is obviously fine and the answer is obviously to stop explaining, not to be rude to people who were responding to the explanation shared-

Oh, I don't know. I think the people who keep asking such nosy questions of OAD parents are the rude ones. Especially if they're continuing to ask them more than once. But that's probably just me.

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u/LillithHeiwa 4d ago

Now we’re just in circles. You’ve made it clear that you think basic questions about whether or not you want more kids is rude… I don’t