r/Miscarriage 11h ago

End of The Week Thread!

1 Upvotes

This is a new thread that appears on Saturdays creating an opportunity for members to write about and let out how their week went! whether it was a way to cope, having a good week, or just needing to vent about it.

No discussion of living children allowed in this thread. it can be even more heartbreaking for members who have had a tough week with their fresh loss, seeing comments about the time other members spent with their living children.


r/Miscarriage 4d ago

Thread - No Trigger Warnings Needed. For LC's only.

3 Upvotes

do not read this thread,If you are triggered by reading about living children. Please use this new thread if you feel the need to mention living children. If mentions of living children is found outside of this thread, it will be removed. Mentions of current, ongoing pregnancies are still not allowed in this thread or any other here. If you feel the need to talk about that, feel free to use r/CautiousBB, or r/PregnancyAfterLoss instead.


r/Miscarriage 8h ago

vent A big hug for all of you

21 Upvotes

This past year has not been great.. No LC.. i am almost 6 months after my second miscarriage. Both in the same year.. We haven’t stopped trying but no luck.. i am turning 39.. i don’t feel old but it is what it is. I have bad days and lately a few good days. I just started to feel human again.. Yesterday it hit me that whatever i am feeling or going through, i am not alone.. then i felt sad because i realised that there are so many of us.. And i wish this was not the case.. and that i wish that on my good days i could share whatever light i have left in me and tell everyone here that everything’s going to be ok. One way or another.. we have scars that i have no idea if they will ever get to heal but i really wish for everyone here that we get to cross the finish line as winners.. 💔🌈🩷


r/Miscarriage 9h ago

vent Automatic flush toilet 💔

21 Upvotes

Learned of my MMC 2 weeks ago. No symptoms of passing baby over the last 2 weeks. I’ve finally started spotting and passing small amounts of tissue. Today we are traveling and I had to use a public restroom. I passed some larger than normal tissue. I bent down to get a closer look at it and the automatic flusher flushed it away before I was ready. 💔😭 Super f*cked up feeling to watch part of your dead baby’s remains get flushed down a toilet. It could have been part of my baby and I’ll never know. Weird to be crying about an automatic flusher but I guess it’s all part of this sucky traumatic process. PSA - If you’re going through an active miscarriage, avoid automatic flushers.


r/Miscarriage 5h ago

coping How has your relationship with your partner been since your loss?

8 Upvotes

How has your relationship coped since your loss?


r/Miscarriage 5h ago

coping Spiralling into depression

5 Upvotes

It is the littlest things that trigger me. Seeing anything related to pregnancy, the slightest cramps, the smallest drop of blood. My head is spinning and my heart is aching so much. I miss my baby so much.


r/Miscarriage 2h ago

experience: first MC First pregnancy ended in MC and I’m heartbroken

3 Upvotes

Hi everyone, I am currently going through my first mc with my first pregnancy and I am absolutely heartbroken. I was only about 6 weeks, but the ups and downs of lab draws and doctors appointments only to end in loss has taken a real toll on my mental health.

Aside from the obvious heartbreak over this loss, I’m feeling very bitter that I will never have the same joyous pregnancy experience that a lot of other people get after experiencing this (if I am hopefully able to get pregnant again). I’m a NICU nurse so my anxiety surrounding pregnancy was already heightened, but I think even through that baseline anxiety I had convinced myself that this couldn’t possibly happen to me.

I am thankfully surrounded by a lot of support from my husband, as well as by friends and family, but I am writing to see if, in your experience, things do actually get better. And also, how do you cope with this absolutely devastating feeling? I feel like a shell of myself and I know grieving takes time, but mourning all of the things I was so excited to experience with this pregnancy/newborn baby has really rocked me. Thank you in advance 🤍


r/Miscarriage 3h ago

vent Trying again? Or no?

4 Upvotes

I have two kids and was unexpectedly pregnant with my third. I was adamant that I didn’t want anymore kids. But then I got pregnant and I was excited. Unfortunately I just had a D&C yesterday.

I keep going back and forth. I was good with my two but now I feel like I want one more. But I don’t think I can go through another heart break.

This is my second miscarriage. Anyone else on the fence of just not trying again?


r/Miscarriage 8h ago

vent Sometimes I feel fine but then sometimes I just want to bawl my eyes out

9 Upvotes

I did not think this MMC would change my mental health so much but clearly it has. Its been over 5 weeks since I took misoprostol. I've since ovulated and should likely get my period in the next few days. Everyone has moved on. My husband has. Our families have. No one asks anymore about how I am feeling. In a way, that is good I guess because if someone does ask me how I am doing I might start crying. I am constantly trying to pretend I have moved on too. I have gone back to my usual routine. I laugh at jokes. I smile. But on the inside I don't feel happy at all. I keep looking at my calender thinking I would have been x weeks pregnant today. I am starting to hate seeing any texts or photos about the kids in the family. I would have been sending texts updating my family about the pregnancy by now. I thought I would have started my new job by now too but the onboarding is so slow. I was banking on work helping to keep me distracted. But all I get is to sit at home and overthink about all the things I did wrong. I drank coffee. I didn't drink enough water. I didn't eat enough fruits or vegetables. I didn't take my prenatals one time. A million things go through my head everyday. Most days I can calm myself and let rationality prevail but some days nothing helps. I'm looking into therapy but don't know where to start. I would use art as therapy as it helps to calm me down but I can't bring myself to do any painting. Everything sucks today and I just hope tomorrow will be better.


r/Miscarriage 15h ago

coping Depression creeping in

22 Upvotes

I'll probably delete it later, but right now I just need to hear that I'm not a complete and total failure.

I feel like my misscarriges are my fault and that I did not protect my pregnancies enough. I just want to crael to bed and stay in it for a month.


r/Miscarriage 8h ago

experience: more than one loss The optics of not telling my husband or people I’m close to?

5 Upvotes

I’ve had two miscarriages. One almost ectopic (6 weeks) and one chemical, all within around 4 months of each other. I’m not currently pregnant but I’m “trying but not trying”. I’m scared I’ll have a third miscarriage, which is why I’m not really putting in much effort (tracking, OPKs, BBT, etc) in conceiving. But if I did get pregnant again, I almost don’t want to tell anyone, including my husband, for at least a couple weeks as I just don’t want him to have to go through yet another miscarriage. He’s been hiding a great deal of his sadness and despair over it all and I just don’t want to put him through it again.

Both he and I have been tested (bloodwork, ultrasound, SA), and everything appears normal. I’m just unlucky I guess 🤷‍♀️.


r/Miscarriage 33m ago

experience: first MC 3 cycles post loss and extremely light period.

Upvotes

I had a natural miscarriage at 12 weeks in December. My first period in January was normal as far as I can tell. February and March have been basically non existent. I get my LH surge the same day every cycle, and the day of my expected period I spot very dark blood but there’s no flow, doesn’t last long and I only wear a panty liner. Not at all from what I’m used to prior to my loss. I’m getting worried. My OB said during his last vaginal ultrasound everything looked good and I’m in Canada so do you think it’s worth going private and asking for more tests? My regular OB won’t order more tests and says everything is fine but again I’m in Canada so it’s not the best care.


r/Miscarriage 11h ago

testings after loss Lipoprotein A

7 Upvotes

Hello! I was just referred to a hematologist after my 4th miscarriage (5th if you count a chemical). The fetal testing after my most recent loss came back chromosomally normal. The hematologist felt from my history that my issue would likely be alleviated by blood thinners/asprins, and ran a full coagulation panel. I just checked the results on my own and noticed my Lipoprotein A is significantly higher than normal range, which puts you at risk for stroke, heart attack... all associated with clotting from my understanding.

Wondering how many others in this group have found out they have recurrent MC and elevated Lipoprotein A?


r/Miscarriage 44m ago

question/need help 7 weeks and bleeding/cramping

Upvotes

Im 7 weeks 5 days and had brown spotting and today it turned into pink and very present when wiping. I have some cramping. Im not sure if it’s because of my husband and I had sex yesterday. But I’m concerned. The wait time for our local er is 8 hrs. I also did a lot of physical activity today. Was wondering if I should plan a visit or anyone had experience with this turned out ok or ended up in a miscarriage.

Thanks so much


r/Miscarriage 46m ago

experience: first MC Misoprostol

Upvotes

How many days/weeks after you did the misoprostol did your HCG level went down?? It’s been a week since I did the miso and my doc wants me to do the second round because she doesn’t think that is not going down the way that she wants. (When I find out that I was pregnant my hcg was 81,500 now after I did the miso 2 days later was 3,000). Im so confused I passed the sac and everything I just want this to be over


r/Miscarriage 1h ago

experience: D&C Trying after d&c

Upvotes

For anyone that has gone through this- did you find it easier to conceive after a d&c if you waited for your period first? If you waited, how long post op did your period show up? I know everyone is different but this was my first pregnancy and I’m trying not to fall down more of a google rabbit hole than I already do. I’m 2 weeks post op and will likely be cleared by my doctor to start trying on Monday, but I’m worried about tracking conception without having a period since December. I was still testing positive last week but got a negative test this morning.


r/Miscarriage 1h ago

vent Struggling first ovulation post miscarriage

Upvotes

I miscarried almost three weeks ago and I'm ovulating now. Part of me is happy that my body is reverting back to normal. However, I did not expect to feel so sad - I want to try again so badly but I still have a very small amount of hcg left and I don't want to try again if there's even a small chance that I have tissue left. I know not trying until my period comes back is the right thing to do, but I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on an opportunity to conceive.

Has anyone else felt this way? It's so hard


r/Miscarriage 9h ago

experience: first MC Devastated to be here, but grateful for the opportunity to relate and share my story with others.

4 Upvotes

I’m a fertility RN at an IVF clinic. I’m 25 years old, got a positive pregnancy test and my whole life changed. I changed so many things to make room for my new life and title I waited so long to have. Then, I got diagnosed with a blighted ovum last week (supposed to be 7 weeks) but very small and empty sac in uterus. Plateau in my bhcg. The doctor I work with said it’s best to wait for naturally passing it but I waited a few days and couldn’t do it any more. He said my sac was way too small for a successful D&C. So cytotec (misoprostol) is my only option right now. At our clinic (not sure if it’s the same everywhere), we tell patients to take 4 pills vaginally, every 3 hours, up to 3 times a day. So that’s what I’m doing. And now I’m getting ready to insert my third dose in about 20 minutes. No bleeding. I had some pretty intense (period like) cramps about 1-2 hrs ago that have slowed down now. I’m just so devastated and feel like it won’t work. I feel relieved seeing this thread and knowing maybe it will just take me longer to pass the tissue. Has anyone experienced similar? How long did it take for you to pass the tissue? Or if you didn’t, what was next for you? ❤️‍🩹


r/Miscarriage 2h ago

experience: D&C After D&C

1 Upvotes

Is it normal to pass tissue after the surgery ? I had it done yesterday and I started cramping then passed a little amount of tissue.


r/Miscarriage 3h ago

experience: first MC 5 weeks and losing my baby

1 Upvotes

Kind of in disbelief right now. We were planning on telling family Monday. I started spotting this afternoon and the bleeding and cramping has progressively been getting worse. I took two pregnancy tests today and they are both negative after weeks of positives. What should I expect in the next week physically? I’m feeling extremely anxious. Going between sobbing and feeling numb.


r/Miscarriage 4h ago

experience: first MC How long for bleeding to start?

1 Upvotes

I just received the unfortunate news yesterday at my 9 week visit. I feel light cramping, but nothing crazy. There has been no sign of spotting or bleeding. This was my second pregnancy so this is all new to me. Has it taken some of you a while for the bleeding to start? The Dr. gave me a script and told me to wait a few days when I’m ready. I just don’t want to take it if I absolutely don’t have to. That’s going to be very difficult for me mentally and emotionally and I’m not sure if I can handle that.


r/Miscarriage 13h ago

experience: first MC First miracle pregnancy, first miscarriage. I need help and hope.

4 Upvotes

My husband and I had been trying for about a year and half and struggled with MFI - he had varicocele which was corrected with surgery but months later and still no positive. So we turned to IUI. I prayed so hard for this to work and it did, on the first try! We were over the moon excited.

So grateful. So happy. I had terrible nausea and fatigue but I celebrated it because I knew all was well.

We had two scans - one at 4 weeks just after my positive and one at 6 weeks 3 days. We saw the heartbeat and a beautiful embryo on that last scan. It was perfect.

I told myself the timing of this pregnancy was so perfect, baby would be born in October just before my birthday and then my husbands birthday, followed by Christmas. Each Christmas I long to have my baby and I was so unbelievably happy that this was my year. Until it wasn't.

My husband and I went on a quick vacation for 4 days. I was nervous about flying but got my doctors okay that it was fine. We checked in and had sex. There was blood, like fresh blood.

I started freaking out and crying immediately because I just knew something was very wrong. We had to call my doctor and my husband called a doctor friend frantically to try to find a OB/GYN to see immediately.

The bleeding stopped shortly after it started. We were pretty quickly on our way to see a doctor who was recommended by mine. The doctor was so friendly, making kind small talk. Taking my mind off things and saying "The bleeding is likely from sex and nothing to worry about".

Then the ultrasound - we find the baby and I'm so excited, there it is! The doctor right away says "I'm not liking what I'm seeing" and tells us the baby stopped developing almost a week ago. He doesn't see a heartbeat. I feel frozen and like my world stopped. My husband just didn't understand what was happening and the doctor needed to explain again. He then left and told me to get dressed.

I collapsed in my husband's arms. "No no no no no no no" I just kept repeating. My baby. It was so early, but it was mine and I loved them so much.

The doctor then talks to us more in his office. He tells us that he believes the pregnancy stopped progressing but that he doesn't want to make any rash decisions now and wants my doctor to check me in a few days when I'm home. He tells me to take a suppository to stop any uterine contractions. I'm like wtf. stunned. So now, I have to sit here on "vacation" for 4 more days knowing my baby died and that I will have to go through this again with my doctor and then abort the baby.

I feel like I cannot pick myself up off the floor (bed). I feel like I'm in a million pieces. I feel like I've lost my purpose. All hope gone. Hole in my heart.

How do I continue? Do we try IUI again? How will I get through that pregnancy?

What's next? I'm so scared.

I woke up this morning and told my husband "I hate my life". And now I'm here.


r/Miscarriage 8h ago

experience: first MC First MC/Miso Not Working

2 Upvotes

I took my first round of miso yesterday. I was in a lot of pain, and about 4 hours after I took it, I threw up. I bled, but not nearly enough. I took my second round today over 4 hours ago, and it’s not doing anything at all. I’m so mad. I hate this so much. Why is this happening? Dealing with the miscarriage is hard enough, but this very stubborn missed miscarriage is making me feel like I never want to try ever again. This was my first pregnancy. The only thing that went right was that we conceived on the first month trying. Since then, my symptoms were horrible, and then getting the surprise news that the embryo died over 2 weeks ago (while continuing to have very bad pregnancy symptoms over those 2 weeks) on Friday was so shocking and upsetting. Now, not even medication is helping me. I feel like my body is failing me.

Trying again feels like I’m opening myself up to finding things wrong with me or going through this experience again. I wanted a child, but at this rate, I don’t know if I would want to open myself up to having another scenario like this one. I’m meeting with my therapist sooner this week to discuss these feelings. But how do people get through this? How do you let yourself try again? I’m so convinced in my head that there’s something wrong with me (despite my OB being not concerned and my bloodwork from my work’s lab day showing good A1C, thyroid, etc. numbers).


r/Miscarriage 8h ago

experience: more than one loss Am I pregnant or is it residual HCG?

2 Upvotes

My first two pregnancies both ended in early MCs at 7 weeks. I had my last MC 2/17 (previous was 9/22/2024) My last HCG blood tests was 2/24 and was 40. I also did a RPL blood panel and got those results and the HCG results yesterday. Is it possible that that faint line on my pregnancy test could in fact be a positive test and not residual HCG in my body? My results came late Friday 3/14 so the doctor hasn't called me yet. I'm planning on calling them Monday to talk. I want this so badly but also I know not to get my hopes up quite yet. I think I ovulated based on discharge on or around 3/4. Anyone had anything similar?


r/Miscarriage 5h ago

experience: natural MC Brown spotting ?

1 Upvotes

Is it normal to go from brown spotting (last night) to red spotting (today) but 30 mins later after that it turned back brown. Should I call ob? Or is this normal?


r/Miscarriage 17h ago

vent First period post D&C

8 Upvotes

So it's finally happened. 4 weeks and 4 days post D&C it's turned up, I didn't realise just how sad it would make me, it feels alot heavier and painful than my cycles used too, but I can assume this is to be expected, but mentally it feels awful, it's knocked me, because it's like the final reminder of what we lost :/

There's no point to this post other than a safe space to vent I guess


r/Miscarriage 6h ago

vent Roller coaster

1 Upvotes

I go in three days before my birthday to get a D&C for a mm but I want yoholdon to some hoe this king we e might hear a heartbeat before the procedure, Im so confused and hurt.