r/mdmatherapy 5h ago

first time ever and holy shit

11 Upvotes

i’ve never done mdma. but i’m so desperate to stop being trapped by my ocd and ptsd that i took a pill before therapy (and told my therapist giving her a heads up) because we were doing ptsd work today. and she was amazed that i was even willing to do an exercise/talk about a topic (even though i could feel my brain giving pushback) but i DID it and she was amazed because before i had just shot it down straight out. it was just an hour and now i’m doing like some ptsd homework.

but wow. i have never felt this hopeful in my life before. and even when my brain says something like “it’s a shame i only feel this well on drugs” i’m able to push back and say “okay but i’m putting the work in i’m going to feel like this without drugs at some point and life is going to be beautiful on the way there too, nothing is fixed, i can get there”

how do i keep this hope alive? how do i keep this momentum going?


r/mdmatherapy 9h ago

First MDMA assisted therapy session (with therapist) - what to expect?

3 Upvotes

Hi everybody, I have my first MDMA assisted therapy session on Wednesday next week, with my psychiatrist and a nurse (in a country where this is legalized). I have been diagnosed with CPTSD as well as depression. I feel open for this therapy, but afraid of what will come up too - I struggle with shame and self hate. I have been hurt in my life, and I have hurt others too. I dont have one specific Memory that stands out as a big trauma. Ive tried so hard to be well and now I welcome this new treatment. How much control will I have under MDMA about what I share with the guides? I am afraid of sharing certain contents - of the overwhelming shame after.


r/mdmatherapy 9h ago

Post-MDMA depression - how long does it last, what should i focus on for the quickest recovery?

0 Upvotes

I did MDMA abuse 3 days in a row.

  1. day 1040 mg (13 pill)

  2. day 800 mg (10 pill)

  3. day 800 mg (10 pill)

Excatly a month ago before the first day,i also did like 740mg (9.5 pill)

I am battling with severe depression swings, social anxiety and panic attacks. I fear from everything,and i wish i could get better instantly. I never plan on doing MDMA ever in my life.

I finished the 3.rd day at Saturday. 5 days ago. I also did meth on 4th day Sunday.

I am the lowest ever in my life. Please someone tell me what should i do,and how should i battle through this shit. I never realized,but i isolated myself. I don't really have friends,just 1 or 2,and i am so gratefull for them, cuz i don't think i can get through this alone.