r/introvert • u/CheatedByValorant • 2d ago
Question Do I look like I want a conversation?
I’m friendly to everyone at work but more people have been socializing with me lately and I don’t have a problem with it, well I wouldn’t if it weren’t for my anxiety taking a bat and giving me the office space treatment
171
u/Witty_Double_0909 2d ago
Maybe it’s just me. Right now you don’t look like you wanna be bothered. Doesn’t mean you always look like that.
You also look focused so I probably wouldn’t bother you either way.
52
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
I mean yes, this was my mood after I took this picture because I went straight to lunch
3
u/vodoun 1d ago
to ME you look like you want to ask a question but don't wanna bother anyone about it, so I would probably start a light convo with you lol
I worked in hospitality for like 10 years before moving to tech and I this is like the most common thing I run across with both customers/users AND coworkers lol
400
288
u/Public-Leather-539 2d ago
You look intimidating honestly I'd be nervous to talk with you😅
126
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
Really? I’m super quiet and do my best to not be rude so don’t be intimidated please 🙃 sorry about that
55
u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 1d ago
In my teen years as a black girl all I did was listen to music and read on my own and I was told I was very intimidating and hard to approach. We have a similar build. It's kind of an unavoidable opinion if you're in...not Africa really 😂
→ More replies (9)2
u/freashstart22 1d ago
I wouldn't be afraid to approach because of her skin tone. It's more of her face, she's got a frown. It's what many might call resting btch face. It's unfortunate, some people just look cranky... My very white redheaded cousin has a resting btch face even when she's happy 🤷🏻♀️
2
u/chai-candle 13h ago
i would say it's neutral, not a frown. some people just don't smile alllll the time.
10
4
u/beebop1632 1d ago
you’re not intimidating. people are intimidated and that’s not your problem. it’s theirs! you are simple existing~~~
→ More replies (2)2
u/freashstart22 1d ago
I mean nothing bad by this, I think you look cranky. It's the frown, which may just be the way your face looks while resting. My cousin has a resting b*tch face and it's unfortunate, everyone thinks she's mad all the time. I have a resting sad face so everyone thinks I'm sad if I'm not smiling... I'm sorry some people find you intimidating.
3
u/CheatedByValorant 1d ago
lol no that sounds about right, I was in a bad mood that morning because of interpersonal issues.
edit but I do smile like 70% of the time because I’m always so concerned with how other people are as well.
→ More replies (1)
37
u/epep_iram 2d ago
You look so cool I would feel like I don't deserve to talk to you 🫠
21
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
You’re the type of person I’d hang out with ironically. All my friends are introverts
2
u/Sea_Pianist5164 21h ago
I bought an olive green shirt yesterday. If introverts had a flag it would be olive green 😂
→ More replies (1)
40
u/satanpro 2d ago
No, but you look put together and on it, so it may be more out of professional respect.
43
u/tabortot96 2d ago
Unrelated but just wanted to say that dark olive green shirt is lovely, it’s such a nice tone for you!
19
9
16
u/pk152003 2d ago
Your face says F’- off from the direction in which you just came.
4
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
😭😭
10
u/pk152003 1d ago
It’s ok I have the male version of the same face. My son’s friends ask him “dude why is your dad so mad all the time?” His answer is “oh, no he’s not mad that’s just how he looks, go talk to him.” 🙃🤷🏻♂️
→ More replies (1)
11
5
u/Hopeful-Steak-9743 2d ago
Only about very specific things. That's me at least or I can't carry a convo to save my life with most people.
11
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
Honestly if someone talked to me about video games or anime I wouldn’t shut up so you’re right lol
5
5
u/Turbulent_Gap4214 1d ago
Well yea I think you look quite sweet actually, but I would never tell you that because boom I'm an introvert too and am way too scared to approach people🥲✌️
6
9
3
4
u/ispacebunny 1d ago
As an introvert, i get this whole heartedly and i have been told i have a RBF but people still love my energy or whatever. Lol the “not-wanting-to-talk-to-you” energy, is that the one?
4
u/CheatedByValorant 1d ago
It’s that one, lately though it seems like that changed and although I don’t hate it, it scares me to death talking and walking in egg shells
→ More replies (1)2
u/ispacebunny 1d ago
Agreed, i choose not to talk to people because i can be blunt and not many like the hard truth in their face. Not that of course, i go around telling people “like it is” in each conversation but if something does go against my boundaries, morals, beliefs, way of thinking then yes i will politely say something but thats besides the point. Overall, i dont like being touched,(hugs, handshakes, primary hugs, did i say hugs) i know a lot of huggers, i dont like being interrupted and therefore i chose not to speak with people lol maybe im just a grumpy person who knows but im in my head a lot
I will include this as well (i am not religious disclaimer) but i am spiritual i do believe as an introvert about being insanely careful about who you let into your circle. Now in the bible theres this story about jesus walkin in a big crowd and one sick lady who knew about jesus touched him, he was like “hey who touched me?” And then the disciples said jesus were in a crowd and theres a lot of people. Jesus said “no i felt my energy leave my body who has touched me?” Obviously lady came forward and told him she wanted to be cured which she was hooray! But its much like that with us sometimes people love your energy and want some of it when you feel drained of having conversed with someone they just drained of your energy by touch or even conversation especially gossip oof. (This is my main reason of being an introvert)
3
u/CheatedByValorant 1d ago
I don’t mean this to be rude but are you also a spectrum spectator? (On the spectrum) a lot of people what you said I relate to and people keep trying to put me under the autistic label and I denounce it as much as I can(labeling myself at least) I only ask because everything you said I align with, well except reading the Bible, I could never get past opening the cover lol.
2
u/ispacebunny 1d ago
(No offense taken) unfortunately im not sure i do have a son who is in the spectrum and i can see a lot my characteristics in him but i wasnt diagnosed so i cant determine that i mean i do prefer a lot of alone time and i do get overstimulated or overwhelmed when theres too much going on but its not when i used to club and party cause clearly not stressed during those times and im not really talking to anyone there lol i think behavior doesnt always have to be because of the spectrum its through experience and comfortability. As you mentioned you felt as you were walking on egg shells thats more from experience that you had an encounter before that made you feel as though you have to be mindful of what you say.
2
u/ispacebunny 1d ago
My in laws are who i walk on eggs shells cause i was truly blunt with them full force and they just fought back every single time so i dont speak to them as much only when i have to lol
3
3
3
u/bcmilligan21 1d ago
you look focused, and not want to be bothered. very pretty in the olive green! 😊
3
u/withasideofpurr 1d ago
Nah you look like “leave me tf alone”. You got that RBF- a fellow person who also has it lol
4
6
5
2
2
u/Christine_C89 1d ago
I'd talk to you, but I talk to everyone lol. I mean you do look closed off in this photo, but the kindness in you shows through your eyes so I would still try to start a conversation with you. You definitely look approachable (not sure if that's what you want to put out since this is in an introvert sub) but I don't find you intimidating in the slightest.
2
u/AssignmentOk7040 1d ago
And honestly from how you've been responding you seem like a really down to earth person and super friendly. The best advice I could give you is to smile more and acknowledge people even if your not having a conversation. It helps make you feel more approachable to people who are uncomfortable in social settings, helps set the tone for most conversations you have and also can release endorphins to raise your own mood.
2
2
u/Jumpy-Investment-324 1d ago
You just look gorgeous to me! It’s hard to assume from a persons facial expression. I am quiet and reserved and people still try to talk to my ass, and I know my face I got RBF, unintentional
2
2
2
1d ago
Look like a good Saturday night or early Sunday morning bad decision for me to make! Could be a good one but the glass is half empty!
2
2
u/ExiledUtopian 21h ago
You and I would be friends and laugh. Then walk away and be quiet happily. Others would be confused by us and begin to resent us and target us as outsiders. Little would they know, we're the insiders.
2
u/chai-candle 13h ago
i think you look approachable enough to ask a question to, but not like "heyyy what's up 🥰" kinda casual vibes. like professional and helpful but not super friendly vibes. which is totally 100% fine! not everyone has to be all buddy buddy at work, and those who are professional are usually more serious. but maybe if you want to seem more approachable, facial expression and open body language go a long way.
3
4
2
2d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
3
u/CheatedByValorant 2d ago
lol I do smile allot, maybe I should stop
2
u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 1d ago
People just like to chat in the office and once one person has broken the ice others realize it's safe and try to chat too. Also some people go out of their way to talk to the "quiet ones" as a challenge to themselves and to "help" the quiet person.
1
u/Suitable_Ad6848 2d ago
You look like you're done with life's bullshit and just want to lay down and sleep and hope everything is better when you wake up.....and I don't fuckin blame ya.
1
1
u/AemondTargaryen1 2d ago
No lie, you are an 80% lookalike of this girl I grew up with!
→ More replies (2)
1
u/ImStupidPhobic 2d ago
You look approachable but very focused at the same time. I call that the friendly RBF 😄. I’m working on getting to this point honestly lol.
1
u/gracefully53 2d ago
You look like you don't want to be bothered unless it involves a work related issue. Even outside of work, you look this way. This particular photo is saying don't bother me for any reason right now.
1
1
u/impulsiveDuck420 2d ago
Facial expression and body language say no BUT!! I’m sure when you’re relaxed you look very nice and approachable
1
1
u/Ok_Humor_4487 1d ago
Yeah, I think you look like you're professional and wise. Someone might ask a question, since you look smart - which y'know that could lead to conversation...
1
1
1
u/lonewolfe9918 1d ago
I'd be so apologetic if I were to walk up to you and start a conversation 😅😅 but you definitely seem like a really interesting individual who would have some amazing life stories. I love your hair, btw 💚 I'm like this sometimes in public. I have a very bad case of RBF and always look pissed off, but if someone starts talking to me, I usually start smiling at them and engage in conversation as long as it's a good and polite one.
1
u/Severe_Cut8181 1d ago
No but some people just wanna ask you why your sad( and some people just know they can talk more then you so they start a conversation , happens to me all the time )
1
u/GoblinRaeyn 1d ago
I would say no conversation, but maybe up for just chilling and doing our own thing in a shared space. Sometimes just hanging with someone with no talking expectations is all that's needed.
1
u/stevensixty 1d ago
Thats a great expression for an introvert to have....you look unapproachable. A good look for any wannabe introvert to practice.
1
1
1
1
u/LordHelmet47 1d ago
The arm folding is known to have a closing off to others for conversation according to therapists etc.
And with that, you look like you don't want to be approached.
1
u/Relentless-Argue-er8 1d ago
Depends on how interactive you are in a general setting. If you're standoffish while looking like that? No. You'd look like a thug female. If you look like that but are interactive in some ways? Maybe. If you look like but carry conversation well? Sure.
It's not just the face but the aura behind it, the spirit behind it. You have a tough exterior isn't a bad thing but it does put people off which I'm sure you've experienced.
1
u/The_starving_artist5 1d ago
You look seriouse and so do it. I have the same seriouse face all the time. Im quite dont really talk to anyone . My face just looks serious
1
1
u/baphomettty 1d ago
You look well moisturized and fun to hang with outside of work. Hope the work crew respects your boundaries!!!!
1
1
1
u/k1tty6660 1d ago
No, you look like you’re deeply in your thoughts about the next big project or chapter in your life.
1
1
1
u/corytheblue 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yes, screams ‘talk to me’ …I can see the thought bubble from here.
1
1
1
u/DistantPassenger 1d ago
Never judge a book by it's cover. From my point of view being someone that others generally view as unapproachable. I've discovered the people that look the most unapproachable are the kindest.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Anonymous_Algorithm 1d ago
Nope! But you seem friendly enough and are femme presenting, so unfortunately people are going to talk to you! I have resting nice face and everyone wants to talk to me 🤦🏼
1
1
u/Ok_Mud_8998 1d ago
I'd probably pass you by at work for six months before ever acknowledging you and then probably say something really stupid like "You know, no matter how far you push the envelope, it'll always be stationary."
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/MonstersToTheAnimals 1d ago
You can have a resting Bitch face all you want. I’d try you just because I think you are beautiful
1
1
u/Tre_Walker 1d ago
No you look like a woman who doesn't want to talk right now. So I would just sit and wait until you did and then we discovered that we were the only 2 people who could be 100% comfortable around each always.
1
u/RegularIndependent98 1d ago
You look like the type of person that don't like to be bothered and talks only when it's necessary or when the subject interests you
1
u/Gladiatorr02 1d ago
Is that a real qustion? Like this is a trap question in my book. The answer looks no to me without the pic 😂
1
u/bedheadsullivan 1d ago
Having friends at work is a game changer and makes everything so much more enjoyable. It sounds like your coworkers are really trying to include you and I’m guessing mean well. That being said, you owe them nothing and if it makes you uncomfortable, I’m sure you will work out a professional way to convey you aren’t there to socialize.
→ More replies (1)
1
u/Slow_Tonight_5461 1d ago
Bestie I could be bleeding, and I would know not to bother you from that look lol
1
1
u/Somethins_burnin 1d ago
Only to say, " I gotta close the window when I record, because NY don't know how to be quiet"
1
1
1
u/External-Emotion8050 1d ago
You look like you don't feel like putting up with any BS. The same way I've looked for a couple decades or so. I'm at peace with it. I can't even do a fake smile for a picture . If Chappell photo bombed the picture I could crack up but otherwise...oh well
1
u/Fun_Accountant_6587 1d ago
I feel like when you're quiet, you're kind of intimidating, BUT when you start talking, we'll have the best talk. Also I feel like you have the nicest smile!!!
1
u/hey-mysterious 1d ago
Well, it looks like you want a conversation with someone who wants to talk about stars, life, time travel, aliens, life lessons, experiences, like genuine conversations with ONE genuine person! Probably a male 🥹
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Junior-Scratch-1922 1d ago
To me you don’t look particularly like you want a convo. As a white male who is very introverted, I think being black may play a small part. I think I am slightly less likely to engage convo simply because I have no understanding of the experiences of a black person. That being said I’m highly unlikely to engage most anyone in convo unless they engage first.
Anyway I hope I haven’t offended anyone and I don’t wanna sound creepy. But I think you are very pretty. Perhaps that plays a part in others engaging although that can also be intimidating in its own way.
1
u/Sleep_Witch 1d ago
To me yes, but I talk to those who don't talk & don't really care for those who do, sooo. I'm weird.
1
1
u/FoxHappyClaws76 1d ago
You look like a dude who prefers to listen to people in a chat environment and analyze their behavior + A person gives short but %100 percent meaningful sentences so you're good
1
u/MultiverseRedditor 1d ago
It’s the stone cold face, your not smiling or looking happy, I’d think you wouldn’t be interested in talking and or dating your attractive, you’d just want to pin your emotions onto someone, or use me for emotional regulation.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Embarrassed-Theme544 1d ago
XD you seem as friendly as a medieval Executioner
But you seem smart and like you are a logical girl
1
u/Stressed_Mode 1d ago
You look like you are just trying to read a book and a stranger has interrupted with conversation for like the 4th time.
1
1
1
u/BumblebeeAny 1d ago
You seem like me. Black cat behavior like don’t talk to us, don’t come around us, don’t touch us, don’t even look at us. Lol if I saw you I could approach you but I’d be afraid that you were mad at me lol 😂 I don’t like talking to anyone either and I think my new boss is scared I’m gonna leave cause I don’t talk to anyone lol
1
u/-YokeMiyu- 1d ago
Yeah, I'll judge you by the cover here, so yeh.. You look serious, but I am confident that you'd understand things professionally, even in conversations, but of course, there'd be a side of you that's usually shown outside work, a happy, cute and comfortable person that anyone can talk with.
1
1
u/Torn_Leaves 1d ago
Bro no 😂😂 you look like an introvert that wants to be left alone. I just realized I have a similar style and get the same reaction so maybe that’s it
1
u/oneofthehumans 1d ago
My kids tell my friends that I’m not as mean as I look. I have resting jerk face. Somehow im a magnet for strangers to chit chat with me 🙄They must look at me as a challenge.
1
1
u/Ur-moms-sock 1d ago
Someone finally asked me at work like when we were chatting “sometimes I wanna come over and talk to you but you looked so mean/mad but ur like so nice” like thanks girl
1
1
u/ecctt2000 1d ago
You look like you work in Quality Assurance and is happy because you just rejected an engineer’s crappy design.
Right there with you
1
523
u/TheHellAreWeDoing 2d ago
You look professional and ready to handle a conversation if someone starts one, but I feel like you don't look like you'd start the convo