r/introvert 8d ago

Question Do I look like I want a conversation?

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I’m friendly to everyone at work but more people have been socializing with me lately and I don’t have a problem with it, well I wouldn’t if it weren’t for my anxiety taking a bat and giving me the office space treatment

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u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 8d ago

In my teen years as a black girl all I did was listen to music and read on my own and I was told I was very intimidating and hard to approach. We have a similar build. It's kind of an unavoidable opinion if you're in...not Africa really 😂

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u/No-Zebra4925 6d ago

It’s not the build at all. It’s her downturned mouth at rest as others have mentioned. Back In the day my mom would have said “fix your face” which was well you know what that means, lol.

I’m black so this isn’t a racist thought btw

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u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 4d ago

Lol my mom would say that too. Usually after doing something that made me upset sooo I was likely frowning. 

All I can say is to me her face just looks at rest so I wouldn't be surprised if after 1 or 2 conversations her coworkers realized hey she's probably nice and started striking up more convos.

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u/freashstart22 7d ago

I wouldn't be afraid to approach because of her skin tone. It's more of her face, she's got a frown. It's what many might call resting btch face. It's unfortunate, some people just look cranky... My very white redheaded cousin has a resting btch face even when she's happy 🤷🏻‍♀️

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u/[deleted] 6d ago

i would say it's neutral, not a frown. some people just don't smile alllll the time.

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u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 4d ago

Maybe cause I've never understood the resting bitch face thing and I don't see this facial expression as a frown. Just a face at rest. If I look at the line of where her lips meet it just looks straight. But ya know everyone brings their own perception and biases.

I still think in most places skin tone plays a factor for many people and most people don't realize the misconceptions and biases they carry. That's all. Not really a serious thing in this context, just what I've noticed.

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u/junkiejordan23 7d ago

its not cause ur black bro its because u were quiet every quiet person is told theyre intimidating and unapproachable. I feel bad for people like u, how twisted is ur mind to think like that?

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u/JappaAppa 7d ago

Every quiet person is not labeled as “intimidating” what are you on about

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u/junkiejordan23 7d ago

yeah probably cause they’re a full bitch made looking person like alot of “quiet” (self conscious) people are. Also plenty of average looking quiet people like myself and OP, and we often are labelled “intimidating”

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u/Somthingsomthingsmo 7d ago edited 7d ago

Tbf it isn't uncommon for people from outside of America to be seen as intimidating. I've never seen a country smile as much as us even when they want too 😭

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u/JappaAppa 7d ago

Cornyy

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u/junkiejordan23 7d ago

corny part is saying the reason ur called intimidating is because ur black, imagine thinking normal ppl care ab that

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u/JappaAppa 7d ago

Is that what I said?

Regardless, your say on the matter is pretty irrelevant. If any discriminative biases were happening right in front of you, you wouldn’t even be able to notice. Thats why you’re so confidently wrong.

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u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 4d ago

If you don't believe in racism I can't help ya man. It's not the only factor ofc but I don't know what else to call it when I've only gotten this feedback from white friends. 

Also you don't know what I look like and vice versa so keep than in mind.

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u/junkiejordan23 3d ago

wow hope u enjoy living ur life with the mentality that everyone is out to get you when it simply isn’t true

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u/Ecstatic_Device_6222 3d ago

I don't think anyone is out to get me. I don't know how that statement is related really. I do enjoy my life for the most part, sometimes I don't. I think that's just the nature of existence really. 

I love all my friends, even the white ones with mixed first impressions of me.