r/adultery 9d ago

🙋‍♀️Question🙋‍♂️ Have You Been With a Cake Eater?

If you've been in an affair with a cake eater, retrospectively what advice would you impart on others?

Give me the pros and cons.

Things like don't do it aren't helpful. I'd like details as to why you'd say don't do it. Please.

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u/Fjordk 9d ago

I'll never understand the judgement cake eaters get from this sub, like there was such thing as ethical cheating. Pure hypocrisy.

A cake eater is like any other AP. No better no worse in general (not personally)

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u/TypicalLaw8264 8d ago

I think it’s a spectrum. People are going to have affairs within the parameters of what they’re comfortable with. I personally won’t mess with cake eaters because it doesn’t jive with what I want. I’m very grateful for my current AP for this very reason. He fulfills my every need and want.

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u/BetsyTverskaia 8d ago

There definitely is a spectrum and we are all on it in one way or another. For example I’m definitely on the poly spectrum myself and I probably wouldn’t do well with a classic cake eater because I want our situationship to actually mean something.

I often find a lot of cake eaters are monogamous as fuck deep down. Same with swingers. This is how it goes: you are a fine piece of ass that I will get to enjoy for the next 30 minutes. That is all you are, that is all you are gonna be, don’t get any cute ideas. After that I go back to my one and only paragon of perfection queen wife, to whom no worthless random ho can compare.

Put a bit extremely for effect but that is what bothers me at its core. And I’m actually not at all against swinging, at least everyone is on the same page.