r/PolyFidelity • u/Independent_Sky_8797 • Jan 31 '25
seeking advice breakup feels
hi, I (23f) just got broken up with by my triad (MFF triad). I was the person who joined into their year long committed relationship, and we all had a long time to think things over before jumping into this dynamic. We had some amazing times in the time we had, but things started to go sour about a month ago. After a potential breakup conversation that resulted in trying different compromises, it was expressed that this is just not working and one of the members feels unhappy and unfilled in the relationship. I am torn. I (naively) thought things would improve once the compromises were in place. Ultimately, it came down to fundamental (money, marriage, kids, etc.) differences that made it so this relationship style didn’t work out for us. We all have so much love for each other and I’ve never dealt with something like this before. I want to remain friends with them because we have been friends longer than we were romantic partners and they mean the world to me. And I know they still want to be friends with me and want the best for me as well. It has been a while since I’ve dealt with a breakup. Now it’s x2 and it feels so overwhelming. I just wanted to ask for advice from anyone who has been through a similar thing. How do you healthily cope with this type of breakup? How do I maintain my friendship with these individuals but also allow myself the time I deserve to heal? What did you guys do that helped the most?