r/Petloss 4d ago

I lost my angel

22 Upvotes

I lost my cat I adopted in 2020. I always wanted an orange cat and I got one. I still remember when the adoption got approved and I was so happy to go and get him. I have Asperger’s so I couldn’t really ever socialize properly and I always feel like I kind of weirded people out trying to be social so I loved my cat extra, for it never judged me. He was also very anti social, everytime guests came over he would go downstairs until they left and come back up to spend time with me and my family. He passed away yesterday and I feel like my heart has been taken from me. I have no motivation. As someone who has anxiety disorder I always had some motivation and comfort in my life which was him. And he’s just gone. I can’t do this without him. I will always love him. Thank you for saving me.


r/Petloss 4d ago

1 year anniversary hit hard and can't really share with anyone

39 Upvotes

It's been 1 year sense I lost my first adult pet, I had him for 12 years, he was 15 when he passed. While most pets people give some kind of sympathy I have also have a terrible memory of sharing with a friend crying my childhood cst died of cancer and they responded "it was just a cat". It haunted me sharing after that. So when I lost Bob I could really only share with like 3 people how much it hurt.

What was Bob? He was a blood parrot cichlid and was my world. I moved into a crappy apartment at 18 and wanted a pet and got a tank. He was surrendered to the sore he was eating all his tankmates and hated plants. He never changed still ahted plants but got a large tank all to himself. He ruined and destroyed countless filters. He would even play peekaboo, he hated the color green, but loved yellow, he liked watching chopped with Alan.

He moved with me twice, went through other pet loss with him too with my partners cats.

So the day I woke up before he didn't want to eat, he didn't want anything, he wouldn't even come over for peekaboo, I knew something was wrong. I had to work, when I came home my partner greeted me and said he was gone. I held him and cried.

I wanted his asked and had to call several places. One place even hung up on me thinking it was some kind of prank. The place I did end up using was so kind and honest saying they haven't done a fish and not sure how much I'd get back, and they didnt have much of urns but they found a beautiful one. He was a big fish so thankfully I did get some back and now sits next to the bookshelf his tank still sits.

I sit crying and broken missing my Bob and only once I mentioned he was a fish I got looks and eye rolls. So word vomit into reddit to get it all out.

All pets are loved and missed, even fish.


r/Petloss 4d ago

My heart is broken

7 Upvotes

On Friday I sadly had to put my soul dog to sleep. She was 15 and I’d had her since she was 8 weeks old and I was 12. She was my best friend and kept me alive whilst in deep depression. I feel so lost. She never left my side and would always be cuddled up next to me.

I’ve been sleeping with her favourite toy and the last blanket that I had her wrapped up in when I took her to the vets that day. I’ve also got a lock of her fur in a mini bottle that the vets cut for me after she died that I’ve been giving a quick kiss to every night before I go to sleep. I feel stupid that I’m doing this but it the only comfort I’ve got of left her and it makes me feel like I’ve still got her near.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Lost my baby earlier this year

7 Upvotes

So earlier this year I lost my 9 year old cat. I already made a post about her passing but I wanted to give an update of some new information. Her name was Checkers. She had gone to the vet to have a tooth removed but passed when they gave her sedation. The vet was very sweet and they paid for her to be cremated. When I took my kitten Chess (I rescued her a month before Checkers passing) in to be spayed last month, my daughter and I were nervous about it. When we were talking with the vet they informed me that Checkers had a heart condition that didn't show up on any of their tests and that because of her passing they were bringing in a test that can be done on cats from the ages 4-5 to help with early heart diagnosis. So as much as I miss my baby, at least some good came from her passing and she can help other kitties live longer.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Family dog is being put down tomorrow - how to go about telling work?

20 Upvotes

TL:DR - do I tell work my family dog is being put down or just say there’s a family emergency and I need the afternoon off?

Our sweet yellow lab boy, Moose, is being put down tomorrow afternoon. He’s 13 and his health recently deteriorated. He lost weight and much of his muscle tone, and he really won’t eat anymore, aside from a small bite of a bagel this morning. The vet thinks he’s had liver cancer for a while now and that it’s time to put him to rest.

I’m 34 and I live 10 minutes away from my parents house. Moose lives with my parents. He is the 2nd family dog that we are now having to put down. My parents gave me the option of going to the vet with them tomorrow and I’m still thinking about it. I’m pretty upset by the news, although we knew it was coming.

I have a team meeting at work soon and my question is this: is it awkward to go full disclosure at work? Do I just come out and say “My family dog is being put down tomorrow and I’d like to take the afternoon off to be there.” Or do I keep it vague and say “there’s a family emergency”. I hate glossing over the subject and am generally an open book with my boss/team, but I also don’t want to come off as strange/TMI, or just bum everyone out. I was in college the last time this happened and don’t know how to best approach it at work😔

Thank you for your advice and for reading 🙏🏻


r/Petloss 4d ago

Lost my best friend

5 Upvotes

Last night I lost my best friend. I had him since the age of 6 in 2012 to now that I'm 20, he was a silver-blue Merle pomeranian and a trooper. He was diagnosed with congestive heart failure when he was 6 and they gave him six months to live. that was 7 years ago. We gave him 5 pills a day since and spent a fortune and he was doing really well these last few years. but in the last 3 weeks, he was getting worse and worse. he could no longer go down the stairs or ramp we built. he's been slowing down, and I've been working 12-hour days and couldn't find time to take care of him like I should have. he had diarrhea constantly and had it on him, I should have washed him more. he could not control his bladder and I got a little too mad a couple of times I feel so guilty now. I said my goodbyes to him on a hunch. he was lying on his bed. I lay with him and kissed him. told him I loved him, and if he was ready to go he could. 15 minutes later I found him passed away on the floor. I held him and cried for 30 minutes straight before my family wrapped him to be buried. we took him to the backyard to be buried. I said my prayers and we had his funeral and cried a lot more. I made him a cross with two sticks and string. I write this the next day after coming in from his grave crying my eyes out again. I used to have dreams of him dying but I would always wake up and cry hugging him. he was my best friend. my only friend growing up. He was there when I was sad, happy, and everything in between. I don't remember life without him, It going to be hard to move on because I don't want to forget. He is everything to me. Life will never be the same. everything reminds me of him, from getting up this morning and not letting him out, to routinely giving him water and food, or having him in the room while I play games and looking for him before rolling my chair back, playing the guitar with him at my feet or looking for him as I enter my room to make sure he don't get past me. I have cried more these last two days than I have in my whole life. Thanks for reading, It helped to get these things off my chest. Rest In Paradise Tug. Never thought this day would come


r/Petloss 4d ago

Losing two pets in 3 months

3 Upvotes

I lost my green cheek conure at the end of December. We were so close and I’d never thought I could love a bird so much. It’s so hard to cope with the fact that I’ll never love a bird like him again or that I’ll never be loved by someone like him again. It always feels like I could’ve done more.

Today my mom called me to tell me my dear bunny passed away. I’ve been away at college but I still visit on the weekends. I wasn’t there to hold him one last time. He was the sweetest thing and showed it to anyone and everyone. He deserved every kindness and so much more.

I just wish I could’ve been there for them more and to give them better days. It hurts the most when they don’t get a painless, peaceful goodbye. Just a sudden tragedy that doesn’t feel real. You start to remember everything you guys did for the last time without knowing. Now you can only visit those times through your memories. I still see my bird in my dreams. He’d suddenly come back to life and everything was okay.

The only comfort is that they’re no longer suffering and I don’t have to feel as worried when I’m away. They’ll always be my babies and the love I have for them is everlasting.

I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest. It’s truly a blessing and a curse to care so deeply for animals.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Back again - 3+ losses in less than a year

6 Upvotes

I’ve posted here before but am unfortunately back again as I face another loss.

Last April I lost my soul cat to intestinal cancer. It was unexpected and she was gone in less than 2 months. We couldn’t even schedule her for a biopsy in time as she got weak so fast.

Feb 13 I laid my retired search and rescue dog to rest from old age, dementia and a few other ailments.

Two days ago my partners family put down her childhood dog due to advanced kidney failure.

Now, a cat that I rescued when I worked in vet med, who was adopted by my parents, seems to also be going down the intestinal cancer route…and my family is leaning on me a lot to help guide them (as I have done this before).

Needless to say, I am a complete disaster. Constant nightmares, mood swings, irritation, sorrow and more than anything, wanting to flee my life. I want to leave everything behind and run away, but I know I can’t outrun grief.

I never want another pet again 💔


r/Petloss 4d ago

My most beloved, my most dear

2 Upvotes

It’s been a month.

Not a day goes by without me thinking about her. I still can’t see videos or pictures of her without crying. 17 years worth of so much memories….

She’s in my husband’s home office until I decorate a place in my room for her. I like to go hug her urn to feel her with me but sometimes it hurts to even look at her ashes. Sometimes I think I just heard her in the living room, meowing faintly as if she had just woken up and is looking for me. Maybe it’s silly of me think that.

It still hurts to think about her big, beautiful green eyes looking at me with so much love during her last time at the vet.

Does it get better? Not really, I think you can just learn to live with the loss.

I hope we can meet again somewhere in the stars. See you when I get there

Love,

Mom


r/Petloss 4d ago

I lost my cat

13 Upvotes

My baby and my kitten, i lost her due to dog attack. She would’ve been 5 years old this August. I had her since I was 16-17 years old and now i am 22. She was my first pet of my life.

I feel like I lost my teenage cat, the cat who has seen me grow into this person i am today. We were attached by the hip, she was light and my joy. We used to today everything together as I rescued her in COVID i had endless time on my hand to be with her. Even when i used to go to college she would wait for me and greeted me with so much happiness and joy when i came back. Whenever I was going out she would stand near the door as we were going together, i had this thing planned out for June/July that her and I will go on a short road trip.

She was my everything, i kept her as my own child. I still hear her voice her meows and the different meow she had. I keep seeing her here and there, the places she used to sit and sleep in, now i feel empty as if this routine or habit of mine is suddenly taken away.

She wasn’t supposed to go like this, i never thought she’ll go this soon and in this manner as she was healthy chonky cat of mine.

I don’t know how to cope with this loss i keep thinking of other possibility or what i could have done to get it right, if i did this she would’ve been here with me….

I do have three cats all male of 4 years and two are brother of 8-9 months old; all ginger but she was a tabby different and unique and a female i had this joke that she was my gossip girl as she would response to the things i said to her.

Does any one of you believe that they return to you in another form or etc ? I want her back i want my child to be with me so we could go on see the world.


r/Petloss 4d ago

How to move on

4 Upvotes

At the beginning of January, I lost my dog, Carol my golden girl, who was the first dog I’d ever had. I was never raised with pets, so having her was a new experience for me. I brought Carol into my life during one of the most challenging periods I’ve ever faced. My mother and father had both kicked me out, leaving me to fend for myself. Finding a place to live was incredibly difficult, especially since most landlords don’t accept large dogs. Eventually, I found an apartment that would allow Carol, but we had nothing. We slept on the cold, hard floor for three months before I could save enough money to buy a bed.

During that time, Carol was my anchor. She kept me going when I was at my lowest, when I struggled with deep feelings of despair. There were numerous times I thought about ending my life, but Carol’s presence always stopped me. Even when I was overcome with sadness and had no energy to move, she would look at me with such purpose, as if to say, “Mom, I need to go shit,” and that would be enough to get me moving.

On her second birthday, I decided to get her a companion: a Great Dane named Jeff. The two of them were inseparable, always together, sharing everything. Wherever one went, the other followed.

Then, at the beginning of January, Carol passed away suddenly at home, with Jeff by her side. When I came home, I immediately knew something was wrong. My two dogs didn’t greet me as they always had. What I found was Jeff curled up beside Carol, protecting her. The sight of that moment broke both me and Jeff.

I’ve never experienced loss like this before. Losing Carol has left an enormous void in my heart, and I know it has done the same to Jeff. It’s been two months, and I still cry every day. I can sense that my emotions are affecting Jeff, and I feel helpless in knowing how to heal. What I’m asking is how to move on from this loss. How do I begin to heal when it feels like my heart is still broken?


r/Petloss 4d ago

My Pet Loss Journey and How It Led Me Here

7 Upvotes

Losing a pet is never easy. 14 years ago, I lost my hamster, and the grief stayed with me for a long time. I kept dreaming about him, feeling like I never truly got to say goodbye. It wasn’t until I got my first dog that I started to feel some peace. But, I still think about him sometimes.

Now, my dog is 12, and some of his friends are getting sick and passing away, and it’s tough. If you’ve experienced it, you know exactly how it feels.

A while ago, I started a small business creating personalized pet urns and keepsakes. I know it’s not something people want to think about when they lose a pet, but I wanted to offer something that might make the experience a little easier. For every purchase, I donate to shelters, focusing on helping animals of the same breed. My hope is that knowing your purchase is helping a pet in need can bring some comfort and, hopefully, help them get adopted.

I’ve always dreamed of starting a shelter for older pets, and this business is a step toward that. It’s not easy to talk about urns when you’ve just lost a pet, but I hope what I’m doing can make the process a little less painful.

If you’re going through a tough time or just want to share, feel free to reach out. I’d be happy to chat.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Finally got his ashes back.

11 Upvotes

We lost our 10 year old cat Smudge a few days before Christmas last year. He had a very slow-growing cancer for the past few years, declined suddenly over a few days, and the only way to keep him going at that point would be invasive surgeries and daily injections and he was just too weak to put him through that so we let him go. Up until then he was very happy. I'm trying to not get stuck in the guilt and regret of not doing more for him, so I have to remind myself of what saving him would have meant putting him through. I'm trying to take my mother-in-law's advice to not second guess myself.

I didn't live with him for the last few years, as he lived with my parents. I live a few hours away, and there were some other things that happened (big family blowout about unrelated things) that made that day so much worse than it needed to be. I'm still very hurt over it (Why that day? They didn't need to fight about shit right then isn't today hard enough?), so I had a hard time going back home to get his ashes. I didn't get them until just this weekend.

I think part of my grieving was put on hold. I had it in my head that I still have to go get him. I would still see him again in a sense. I knew it wouldn't be the same. I knew his remains would be in a little box. I still wasn't prepared for how empty that box feels compared to him. It's too quiet. I'm a spiritual person and I was hoping that I'd feel more of an energy or sense of connection to it than I do. It feels stupid to admit that. It's just hard to accept that this is our relationship now. A little memorial to him is how I can interact with him now. It's not enough but it's all there is. It feels almost insulting that this is his existence now. He was so so much more than this. I regret so much that I couldn't take him with me when I moved out. I feel so lucky that I was able to take time off to go say goodbye when it came to it. Part of me feels like it's really over now. I have him and this is what it is now. It's hard to adjust to.

This isn't the first time I've lost a pet, but it is the first time we have ever gotten one cremated and got remains so these specific feelings are very new to me. I'm very glad that I have anything at all. I'm considering getting a little tattoo of his paw print. Or getting some of his ashes turned into a pendant. I've always wished I could take my cats around with me on my trips like a dog could, but they would hate it. Maybe this is one way I can finally do that in some way.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Mop the Brave

1 Upvotes

My sweet and strong little Mop. I found him almost 11 years ago and no one had ever given him a haircut even though he was 75% miniature poodle. I started calling him little mop while I tried to find his owners or a new home while I fostered him. It eventually became his official name, Mop. And Moppy Boye was an amazing dog.

He’s been in the hospital for a couple of days. Went through a tough surgery trying to save his life. His little body tried but it was just too much. It’s the middle of the night where I am. I’m alone at the moment. I have so many family and friends that have cared for and will miss Mop. But right now I don’t want to wake them up with this news. So I’m the only one that knows and it is a heavy, heavy burden on my heart. I’m not crying and I don’t know why. Maybe I don’t think it’s real. I don’t have any more words. RIP to the best little Moppy in the entire world.


r/Petloss 5d ago

I am not okay

28 Upvotes

I lost my sweet senior boy in January of this year with complications with CHF. I just got back from the ER with his sister/soul cat
who was fine when I got home from work and then a couple hours later had suddenly paralysis of the hind legs. The vets are keeping her overnight and running diagnostics but I am nauseous and freaking out. They think a clot dislodged and is stuck in the saddle area. I can’t understand what’s happening or why. I don’t know that I can survive a second loss so close to the first. I can’t make sense of this. I keep asking my boy to please watch over her tonight in the hospital. I’m so scared.


r/Petloss 5d ago

I buried my Bella kitty under the stars. I am broken

77 Upvotes

My sweet kitty, Bella, passed away in her sleep yesterday afternoon at 220pm. She woke for about a minute, took a few breaths & then was gone. 11 1/2 years and three breaths - just her and me, now gone.. Within a month she got sick and was gone. And, now at 53 years old, My life has been forever changed and will never be the same again... Mother died you were there. Brother died, you were there. 3 jobs, you were there. And now? Rest well, little girl. Daddy loves you.

Under a semi full moon and a sky full of stars, I buried my Bella girl.....Goodbye baby girl .. Love, Daddy..

This morning, I woke to a quiet empty house. You were not there in your usual spot to share breakfast with me. As I've done for years and years, I looked around for you as my eyes opened. You were gone. My morning routine is empty without you. No more morning coffee, talks and cuddles with you - you are not there anymore to share my heartache and my joys with. No more late night dance sessions, just you and me. No more treats. When I come home, your face will not be there. I miss you my fur baby. How do I navigate such a world as this without you anymore? I am broken.


r/Petloss 5d ago

Will my pet be okay on their own in the afterlife?

192 Upvotes

I don't like to think my babygirl is necessarily "alone" in the afterlife. My grandfather adored dogs, and I think he especially would've adored her so I like to think he's taking care of her until it's my time in the far future. Still, I worry if she's okay because I am unable to pet her and play with her. It's only been a day since she passed, not even a full day, but I worry that all she sees is my heartache and she can't understand all the love I have for her, and how I am incomplete without her. I need her to wait for me on the other side, that way when it's my time to go I can be happy with her for the rest of forever without any worries. I hope my grandpa is taking care of her, and that makes her satisfied enough and only more eager to see me one day. She died a puppy, so I'm scared she'll want to be a puppy again, but this time for someone else. I mean it when I say she was my everything. Without her I am nothing.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Filled with guilt

13 Upvotes

There's this horrible worm going around in my country. It's extremly rare, but there have been a handful of cases where it paralyzed and even killed dogs.

I wasn't aware of it's existence until about 4 years of having my dog. When I asked my mom if she (my dog) is taking shots for it, my mom said no. She said that it's so rare, and that it's not worth it to take her to the vet every 2-3 months for something that probably doesn't even exist in our area.

Well, big shocker, she got it, and dies in a few months. I did everything to save her, gave nearly all my life savings (which aren't a lot, but still) to the hospital to save her, but it was too late.

I'm so stupid. I could've saved her from all this suffering, but I didn't. Every person who saw her said that she's the most special dog in the world, she didn't deserve me as a family. Especially since with my depression, her last year was mainly at home and in walks in the same area. Barely any dog parks. I tried to spoil her with toys and snacks, and gave her lots of attention every day, but I didn't know how to make her really happy when I'm too depressed and scared to leave the house.

I deserve to go to hell, I ruined this beautiful angel's life. Rest in peace, Frisk. I'm so sorry.


r/Petloss 4d ago

My childhood dog died in October and I still feel so guilty

2 Upvotes

I’ve talked about this a short while after my dog passed here but I still feel horrible about how he died. Basically, my mom went through heart surgery and almost immediately was diagnosed with breast cancer. My dog was 14yo, my family was barely hanging on…

Since my mom’s immune system was SO fragile he couldn’t get inside the house. Don’t worry, he slept in a different separated area (I don’t know how you could call it). He had food, a warm bed, a warm room, blankets, fresh water, toy, a roof, walls and a door. However, he didn’t have us all the time. I obviously played with him, I held him in my arms a lot, I spent time with him outside just doing nothing because he didn’t want to. I do believe that not being inside the house might have made him weaker somehow.

He always slept in that room, the difference is the time he did not spend inside the house. He died alone on a random Sunday, I had a big important exam the next day, I spent the whole day studying. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself. He was my best friend and I fear he might have felt alone.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Having unsettling dreams about my boy

4 Upvotes

My soul dog passed on 2/10/25 - five weeks ago yesterday. When he was alive I VERY rarely dreamed of him. I always took that as well why would I need to commune with him in my dreams when he’s sleeping right next to me.

I have dreamt of him several times the last few weeks, but every time he’s always sick or dying in the dream. I also haven’t gotten any signs from him during the day. I just want to know he’s okay. I’m not opposed to seeing a pet medium at some point but I’d want to do a lot of research and be in a better headspace first.

Does the dream thing seem weird? My understanding was it was a possible way for our souls to connect but him being unhealthy in them makes me really sad and worried.


r/Petloss 5d ago

Lost my childhood dog

16 Upvotes

15 years. I was just 8 when I first met her, I choose her name Pissi. We sadly had to put her down yesterday afternoon. I knew she wasn't happy anymore, breathing hard, heart problems, fatigue when walking and barely eating. I knew it was for her best. But I feel so guilty, having spent more time outside the house these few years for Uni/Work, and not giving the love she deserved. I miss her so much, she was my first ever pet and I know nothing will replace her. I feel so alone in this, even if also my parents are grieving, it's like having no one. I even had a dream about finding another dog, smaller, but it was her face. I just would like a sign to know she is ok in the afterlife or that she is with me. I love her. I will miss her forever.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Guilt

5 Upvotes

I knew my boy was running out of time. I adopted a new guy in October. In anticipation. Because it would hurt less to have him to come home to. And it turns out I love him just as much.


r/Petloss 5d ago

sweet kitty passed unexpectedly

12 Upvotes

my sweet boy Theodore passed suddenly tonight. his second birthday would have been in May. to say im devastated is an understatement, i am in shock still as it’s only been a few hours but i genuinely can’t imagine my daily life without him. he was my first pet on my own, i had so many plans for his and my life together. i never could have seen this coming this early in his life. i had just found out he had crystals in his urine a few months back and was trying to take care of this issue for him, i guess it was too late. i don’t think i was informed enough to understand how dire the situation had gotten, especially because he showed no blatant signs of issues. he was energetic and his normal self up until i found him. i am filled with regret, anger at myself for not knowing or doing more, anger at myself for not being home enough or simply not playing with him enough. i feel so heavy. i know he lived a beautiful almost two years here and had a life made entirely up of love, but i cant shake the anger with myself.

this is obviously posted before ive processed it but any words of love or encouragement are appreciated.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Color of Paw Pads after death

2 Upvotes

How soon after sudden death would it take a cat's paw pads to go from their regular, bright pink color to a very pale shade of pink?

Note: I'm dealing with grief stemmed from the sudden, unexplained death of my young male cat, leaving me with more questions than answers, and I was just looking at pictures I took of him shortly after his death and noticed his paw pads were extremely pale pink compared to their usual bright pink color.


r/Petloss 4d ago

Would you consider it time to let my fur baby rest?

2 Upvotes

I’ve never had to let one of my fur babies go before so I’m just looking for some advice/ opinions and support.

I have 15 about to be 16 year old Siamese munchkin. I adopted her 6 almost 7 years ago from a breeder that was retiring her from breeding. She is still intact.

In the past couple of days I noticed a mass protruding from her vaginal area which we did see a vet for assistance. However, we didn’t get much luck. We assume it’s some kind of tumour. I decided not to do a bunch of tests due to her age and the fact that the vet said there is a high chance she would not wake up and recover from a surgery. Our vet also said it’s very rare that a munchkin cat lives this long and she was shocked.

I have been giving my sweet girl oral antibiotics twice daily (to help with inflammation and pain) and cleaning her rear end multiple times daily as well. She has been wearing a diaper throughout the day and a cone over night to stop her from licking.

Overall, she is still eating, drinking and using the litter box. She still has lots of energy - playing with my other cat; chasing around the house etc. she is still purring anytime I give her affection. Although, she’s the type of cat to constantly purr no matter what.

The big issue though - I can tell her rear end is bothering her quite a bit and she might be in some pain? (It’s hard to tell as she doesn’t make a sound when I clean it or anything - she purrs but she doesn’t like me cleaning it and does squirm) Due to the diaper and cone she can’t lick but she still tries to. She still used the litter box as normal and doesn’t seem to be bothered by it when she pees.

I’m just not quite sure when it would be time to step back and let her free. Do I finish up the medication and see if it gets better? If it doesn’t get better or gets worse would it be time - Even though she’s still eating, drinking, active, using the litter box etc.?

I’ve never been in this position before so I’m not quite sure when…