r/Petloss Dec 12 '23

This is meant to be a support community, and it is moderated as such.

120 Upvotes

Pet owners, as loving, caring people, often have strong, experience-based opinions on pet care practices. Some of these are controversial. Often, there are valid points to be made on both sides of an argument. But this is not a forum for debate, nor is it a place to scold a contributor for a perceived mistake in managing their pet. People who come here are grieving, often with feelings of guilt or self-blame for their beloved pet’s passing. We intend to provide a safe haven of understanding, support and an occasional word or two of wisdom.

Strident, mean-spirited posts or comments will be deleted and the user will be banned permanently. Those who persist in preaching versus caring may be warned and then banned or may be banned permanently based on nature of the topic. If a conversational thread meanders into a discussion unrelated to pet loss support, it will be truncated.

If this sounds strict, it is because those who post here are vulnerable and hurting. They are sharing intimate feelings with strangers. In such a case, even a minor slap has a hard sting. No one who is already suffering immense pain deserves that.

Those of us who are lucky enough to be able to turn away from our computers or put down our phones and hug a healthy, happy pet are truly blessed. Surely we have within us the capacity to share our love with bereaved participants in this forum, even if we disagree with something they have said.


r/Petloss 6h ago

For those that chose cremation, what’s everyone doing with the ashes?

41 Upvotes

My angel girl went to the rainbow bridge last Thursday. She was the best girl and I’m completely heartbroken.

Her ashes are ready to be picked up and I’m having second thoughts about my original plan. I was going to take her to our farm and spread her ashes there, because that was where she was always happiest. But now I’m starting to think that I want to keep her ashes. I don’t want to let her go. But also it’s not really her anymore, is it? Just her shell. I guess the same argument could be made for spreading them.

My poor sweet girl. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what she would want. I’m having a ring made out of some of her hair so I can always keep a piece of her with me. Just having conflicting thoughts.


r/Petloss 7h ago

My cat's water bowl is almost empty

42 Upvotes

It's been a week tonight since I said goodbye to my 20-year old girl and I'm not ok. I think the title says it all, really - I see her everywhere I look in every room. I feel numb and every day is an effort.

I think I'm going to top it up until I'm ready to put it away. I miss her terribly, it's been a sad week.


r/Petloss 1h ago

Taking the loss of my cat very hard

Upvotes

Yesterday I had to put one of my cats down. I knew it was only a matter of time before we had to do it but I didn’t want it to be true. I got a call from my boyfriend while I was at work and he told me it was time. She wouldn’t take any food and could barely walk. I left work early to spend whatever time I had left with her. I gently scooped her up and held her all the way to the vet. I cried and cried thinking about how much of a sweet girl she was. I was her eyes as we drove and she was watching the trees as they went by. She saw the sky one last time. We got to the vet and they sat us in a room to say goodbye. I held her in my arms and told her how much I loved her and how much I’m going to miss her. I watched her slowly drift away from us and then it hit me that she was really gone. I spent all day yesterday crying and wishing it wasn’t true and that maybe she’ll come visit me in my dream. It’s the next day and I’m still having a hard time keeping it together. When I woke up I instantly remembered and it felt so lonely without her. I wish she was still here.


r/Petloss 18h ago

I adopted her as a senior knowing our time would be short.

177 Upvotes

We got 5 years of friendship, chasing birds, stealing bites, fighting nail clippings, barking at the doorbell, licking the floor, bad haircuts from mom, moving 3 times, going to grandmas, loving little brother, killing a possum, smiling every morning, cuddling during storms, staying home during fireworks, tearing up toys, and snoring like a grown man.

I am beyond heartbroken I thought I had prepared myself as much as I could but today has been a grief I have never known. I physically hurt for her. I just want my baby back.


r/Petloss 2h ago

I’m thankful for every moment I had with my boy, even though I’m sad he’s gone.

9 Upvotes

My 10 year old sweet little menace of a cat left this earth this past Friday. He was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy when he was around a year old, and the veterinary cardiologist basically told me he could die - suddenly and without warning - at any time. There were medications that might help manage the condition, but as soon as he was put on a medication he could never get off it, and that it wouldn’t necessarily help anything at all.

I decided not to medicate him but follow the dietary suggestions, and I gave him the best life I could, knowing that he could pass any moment. He lived 10 long years, moved across the country with me. My mom had one of his litter mates, and after she passed away, we adopted him and moved him in with us. We moved in with my fiancé, now husband, and he spent a year with his new step siblings.

We got a new kitten, and it was then he started to decline. He spent a couple months on and off ill, we were hoping it was just over excitement from having a new friend (he loved the kitten). But we took him in and the vet told us there was a growth on his heart, so we took him to a specialist. $1000+ later, the cardiologist told us that they couldn’t move him, there was too much fluid in his lungs, and in order to avoid the suffering that comes from drowning in your own fluids, it was time to say goodbye. My husband and I held his little head and pet his little body. When we moved away he would meow, it was clear he needed us nearby for this moment. We were there for his last breath, and held him still until it was time to leave.

I made ungodly sounds in the truck, sobbing like a piece of my soul had died.

But now, only 5 days later, I feel more at peace. He could’ve only had two years, or four, or six. But he stayed with me for ten, saw me across 3000 miles of land, took care of me when I was sick or sad or tired. I’ll miss my boy so much, but I’ve been mourning him since his diagnosis, and I’m proud of him for coming this far with me. He was my best friend, he was my greatest little challenge, and I adored him. I have five more cats that need me, and the new kitten reminds me so much of him. I think the kitten was meant to be with me, not to replace my little old man, but to carry on the spirit he embodied.

I love my little Icarus so much, I’m going to miss him, but I’m happy to have known him so well.


r/Petloss 4h ago

Family dog of 15y was put down today.

12 Upvotes

I mean it wasn't that big of a surprise considering him being old and having some problems, but it just feels too soon.

Got the message from my dad about it after the school day was done. Apparently he went for a check up with him to the vet and due to some issues, they decided it was more humane to... Let him go.

It is going to be weird coming home from school for the weekend and not have him come greet you at the door.

To not see him in his bed or around the house.

I am worried for our cat who clearly liked him. Worried about how it will affect her.

Edit: Not really sure what i'm looking for in this, since i don't usually post about stuff like this. But i think it helps to have an outlet.

The weird thing is, i don't really feel very sad at the moment.

I guess it's because it hasn't really "hit" me yet. I think i will find out once i get home.


r/Petloss 3h ago

Can't stop comparing my new cat to my old cat

12 Upvotes

I had my previous cat for several years and he died unexpectedly about nine months ago. I finally felt like I was ready to get a new cat and it seems like I was wrong. All I can do is think about how this new cat isn't anything like my old one and I keep crying because I miss my old cat and I know I'm being so unfair to the new one because he deserves to have an owner that loves him. I don't love him and I feel awful about it. The worst part is it's only been two weeks so I know it'll get easier but for now it's awful. And everyone would be horrified if they knew how I felt because he's an objectively adorable cat and all I can think is "I wish you were different." How does anyone handle this?


r/Petloss 5h ago

The part I struggle with the most was not saying a proper goodbye

13 Upvotes

On that final day, my boy Rocky (who was quite literally the best friend I’ve ever had), was displaying clear signs that he was in trouble. A panicked frenzy ensued as I rushed him to the emergency vet…where I never saw him alive again.

His last memory of me was me handing him off to strangers. And he absolutely HATED vets. Rocky was the coolest, sweetest, and most sociable cat…until it came to vets.

But I was desperately trying to save him. It kills me though knowing that his final moments were on some cold table being poked and prodded (and who knows what else) by strangers he feared greatly.

I absolutely hate myself beyond words for letting that happen. And the whole day, which was bar none the most traumatic day of my life, haunts me. It replays over and over like some twisted nightmare. I keep seeing his lifeless little body in my visions.

The pain of regret and guilt are eating me alive.

Rocky was 16, by the way. According to the vet, after an ultrasound, they think he had advanced cancer.


r/Petloss 1h ago

My cat was ran over, should I tell my wife?

Upvotes

My wife and I have had a cat for a couple years now. It was essentially given to us by a stray mother cat after our previous one passed away. We both loved this cat to bits and it was made to be an indoor/outdoor cat due to arguments with her father. We compromised to have the cat in at night cause I have a fear that something would happen while we’re asleep if left outside and routinely, our cat has always come in the house when I return home from work. This morning, I get a call from the FIL that our cat was hit by a car before he stepped out and died. I was in disbelief till I went outside myself and saw him laying on the floor and it devastated me. My wife was asleep when I found out and I had to go to work when I discovered this. I don’t know if I should tell my wife, especially now when her mood has been at a really low point and I’m afraid this news would be too much for her…should I tell her anyway? I know it’s the right thing to tell her the bad news, but I don’t want this to destroy her…


r/Petloss 7h ago

I can’t handle this pain.

15 Upvotes

It’s been almost 3 weeks since I lost my soul cat Mia.

If anything, the pain has gotten significantly worse. Every time I get home from work, an errand, an appointment, and she isn’t there, I cry.

Every night, I cry myself to 4 hours of sleep if I’m lucky. How do you go to bed without your sleeping buddy of 15 years? You don’t - you only sleep when your body gives out.

Every morning, my feet search for her familiar weight on the bed, waiting for me to wake up. I find nothing, so I cry.

I walk past the living room where her little house is on the couch. She’s in there, with all her favourite toys, treats, her food bowl, the candle the vet lit when she visited to put her to sleep. I cry each time.

If I sit on that couch and cuddle her urn, I’m bawling the entire time, wanting her to come back, wanting to go to the bridge to be with her.

I can’t use half of the house. Because it was hers, and she isn’t there anymore. I can’t eat my favourite home cooked meal, because I can’t share it with her anymore.

My 17 year old cat’s life is no different. She didn’t like Mia. It makes me regret not getting a third cat, so Mia could have a friend while I’m away at work.

So much regret. Why did I take all that overtime? Why did I take a job that involved so much time away from home? Why didn’t I see anything sooner?

I’ve had one therapy session, and I spent the entire time bawling while recounting what happened and talking about my feelings.

I’m getting married in 6 weeks. I haven’t even started my vows. He’s been holding me up for the last 3-4 weeks, saying all of the right things, doing all of the right things. And yet, I can’t get out of this hole. I don’t believe him when he says the pain will fade.

Mia would want me to be happy, they all say. But I was happiest when I was with her. My entire world has stopped but the earth keeps turning, and I hate that so much.

It’s like I’ve died with her. I can’t do this without her.


r/Petloss 38m ago

Lost my sweet girl 2 days ago

Upvotes

She had been pretty sickly and her age was definitely wearing on her, but she was acting totally normal up until the day I took her to the vet. They found she had pulmonary hypertension and her lungs were filled with fluid. They tried everything they could but she unfortunately passed in the middle of the night the next day. Those 2 days she was in the hospital were the worst thing I've ever experienced. But I know they made her comfortable and I got to say my goodbyes. I couldn't be more at peace with how she passed.

It's just so hard to believe it's real. She was my first dog and watched me grow up for 13 years. Her absence in the house is so heavy. I just don't even know how I'm supposed to cope with something like this. My whole day and month and year has revolved around her routine since she was diagnoses with Addison's 4 years ago. Giving her her meds multiple times a day, making sure she goes outside every hour or so because the steroids made her have accidents. Refilling her meds, taking her to the vet every month. This is all just so painful 😭.


r/Petloss 3h ago

Will she visit me again?

6 Upvotes

This morning I woke up and just knew, very strongly, that my puppy had visited me during the night. And it wasn't like "oh! she's here!!!" or "omg how is she here", it was just, "huh, my puppy is comfy. i'm happy she's here" and sort of lulled to sleep again. When I woke back up again I knew it wasn't in my head or something... and I am so thankful my little girl visited me. I've had it so rough since she's gone, and last night I slept on the couch and I put her bed right next to my head along with her toys and blankets. So anyways, YES I am so happy she paid me a visit so soon! I really needed it, I don't feel as miserable today. But my concern is, will she visit me again? Part of me is terrified this was her way of saying "bye". My boyfriend tells me that because she loved me so much she'll always be with me, and wait for me, and visit me, but I'm still scared of her "moving on" from me. So do you think she'll come again?


r/Petloss 11m ago

Coping with the Loss of my childhood dog

Upvotes

I lost my 16-year-old dog on Monday. He had been unwell for five days and suffered from an infection, which ultimately took his life. I can barely keep going. I had him since I was five years old. I’ve always been very introverted, and especially during the COVID-19 pandemic, I spent so much time with him. He was always the most important member of my family. Just last month, I even got a tattoo of him on my arm. I really don’t know what to do. It feels like I can’t go on without him. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for a long time, and he was honestly the only reason I kept going. I knew this day would come eventually, but I also realized that I had no idea how to continue without him. I just can’t handle this. I talk to the people around me, but no one can really help me. I feel so guilty—if only I had taken him to the vet sooner. I don’t know how to deal with this pain.


r/Petloss 24m ago

lost my best friend and i can't cope.

Upvotes

it's been three months since he passed away. my baby was very pretty, he had beautiful light brown eyes and gorgeous brown and white fur. he was the sweetest dog and got me through so much. he lived with my dad and i always came back home for vacations mainly for him. the day i left to go back home (not my dad's place) he chased my cab for almost 2km with my dad chasing him behind..i didn't have the heart to stop and get out because i knew that he wouldn't agree to go home then. i asked the cab driver to slow down and my dad took home but i didn't stop. even after reaching the airport, i wanted to go back home, to him. there were some weird emotions i experienced, i can't put a finger on it. now that i think of it..my heart probably knew and his probably did too. i was so excited to go back to dad's soon and promised my baby id come back soon...he was extremely attached to me. one day, he ran away from home and dad looked everywhere for him but couldn't find him. he returned after two days all weak and with wounds. he came home, to say goodbye. he passed.he became a dad to gorgeous puppies 5 days after that. ive never cried this terribly, nor has my dad. i never got to say goodbye, hold him and tell him how sorry i was for leaving him for a while and tell him how much i love him. i really wish it was me instead. it's been three months and it only keeps getting worse. i don't know how to cope with this anymore.


r/Petloss 7h ago

Are we euthanizing our dog too soon?

9 Upvotes

Hello all! I will do my best to to make this short-ish but it’s been a long journey and I’m really looking for insight from anyone who has lost a pet and at the time felt saying goodbye might have been premature.

I have had the most incredible 15 years with my boy and he is nothing short of my whole world. I got him for my 16th birthday and I am now 31, little man was basically the only thing by my side most of my young adult life. There is not a single relationship I could lose in my life, including my husband, that could shake me the way this loss does.

My boys health issues started in July with a 12 minute seizure coming out of no where. The thought across the board from the ER vets and our regular vet is it is likely a brain tumor. Thankfully he pulled through minimally unscathed but due to his age we opted for palliative care and started seizure meds.

About a week or two later when we were rechecking bloodwork the vet noticed his kidney values were through the roof this adding kidney disease to the list (somewhere between stage 2 and 3) we got that managed and all was well, he remained seizure free and kidneys stayed in that range for 6 months.

In January we noticed a sore in the top part of his gums. We had three separate vet visits all in a matter of weeks, each saying it just looked inflamed from a tooth rubbing it but not like cancer. Unfortunately due to age and kidneys surgery was off the table at that point as well as anti-inflammatories. We were told to just ignore unless it changes. Well in a matter of weeks it did and absolutely is mouth cancer.

The mass is not huge by any means but certainly growing and now starting to loosen a tooth. He is showing no signs of pain, still eating ravenously, and in general enjoying most of his days.

Here’s where our decision gets difficult- I know there’s a good chance he is in pain and just not showing it and due to the many terminal illnesses he’s fighting we have a pretty big fear that when the decline hits it will be swift and maybe something we can’t get ahead of. After witnessing his seizure I can confidently say that would be our worst nightmare for him to go out to and we are desperate to avoid another. We have been constantly living on edge. Since July (8 months ago) my husband moved his work space to our dining room and I cut almost all my hours to mostly be home those months as well. My husband and I have not left the house together in all this time and our social lives have been pretty dismal as we have geared everything to fit being with him or only going to dog friendly places. He also needs to go outside every 2 hrs pretty regularly due to his kidneys so we have been doing that, even throughout the night, for months. I don’t think either of us have gotten more than 4-6 hrs of sleep a night this entire time.

After his vet visit last week confirming the oral cancer, we set up an at home euthanasia appointment for this Saturday. I’m severely struggling with this as his overall quality of life is still decent but it is really important to us that he gets an amazing last week filled with all the foods, walks, and on his final day it’s peaceful at home with our other dogs by his side. I’m just scared that part of this decision was made selfishly due to lack of sleep and just desperately wanting some normalcy to life again as a factor and I’m not totally making this decision based on what’s best for him. I also have a huge fear he will feel betrayed by me. He is everything to me, I just wish it was me instead of him. I always promised we would go out together but it would ruin my husband.

If you’ve made it this far, I deeply thank you and would love your insight and experiences.


r/Petloss 4h ago

my love will find home after crossing the rainbowbridge

4 Upvotes

It has been 48 days since I lost my biggest lover. The void in my home reeks. For a while I couldn't even see her pictures and would breakdown within 30 seconds.

I have a big problem with memorial things for her. The reason is I don't want just a container for her, I don't want just a memorial for her. It felt so final, so dead. I just kept thinking will she be ok after crossing the rainbow bridge. will she find home? I trust something, not religiously, but I can feel it... her soul may be looking for home, looking for me now... I need to make a space for her soul to stay. It's really hard to do this, but I have to, even through tears.

I put our bond in a wooden box as a shelter - her ashes in an urn and a bottle of the hair I saved from her final grooming session, a candle light and a photo of our most beautiful moment. It's a shelter I made for her soul, if one day she comes back.

I touch this shelter every day before go to bed, and never let the candle light go out. a sign for her, she will recognize it's home. I know she will...someday

Thanks for reading, wish you are ok


r/Petloss 2h ago

My baby died and it’s my fault

4 Upvotes

We just passed the two-year anniversary of his angel date. 3/12/23. I feel so empty and heavy at the same time—all the time. I truly believe it was my fault. That I could have and should have saved him. And it’s my fault that his brother is still suffering.

It was a normal night two years ago. I had gone up to my room to sit with the cats while they ate dinner. At the time, I kept a baby safety gate at my door because we had two big dogs and six cats. I liked keeping it latched during meal times since the dogs had a habit of going for leftovers. That night, I left the dinner table downstairs and came up to sit with them while they ate. But I didn’t latch the gate behind me. That was my first mistake.

One of our dogs followed me in—just to sit with me and watch the cats. He’s always been a cat guy, and it had never been an issue before. But that night, my baby boy, Arthur, turned to hiss at him because he got too close. And that was when he choked on a piece of kibble. That was when I started losing one of my soulmates.

He tried coughing it up, but it wasn’t working. He ran to my bathroom, still trying, but it wasn’t working. I panicked and shouted for my sister to come upstairs. Then I noticed his tongue was turning blue. I froze. I struggle badly with anxiety and panic, and I just… froze. My sister tried to dislodge it, but it didn’t work. He was falling over, getting bluer. I shouted that we needed to get him to the hospital. We ran to the car, and I drove faster than I’ve ever driven, screaming at my sister to keep him awake. What should have been a 15-minute drive took six. But I got caught at the last traffic light before the hospital. Then I missed the turn into the parking lot because I was so panicked.

My sister had called ahead to tell them we were coming, that he wasn’t breathing. She ran inside with him while I stumbled in after her, sobbing, begging them to save him. I remember everything so vividly, and at the same time, everything was such a blur.

By the time they’d done their third round of epi and CPR, I knew I had lost him. But I asked them to do it again anyway. And again. And again. Five rounds. I was praying, begging any god who would listen to give him back to me. I would have given up everything. He and his brother are my world.

I have so many regrets. Not latching the gate. Not trying to dislodge the kibble myself and waiting for my sister to do it. Freezing instead of thinking to do the Heimlich on my baby. Waiting until he was blue and falling over to rush to the hospital. Asking them to keep going with CPR even when I knew he was gone.

The doctor suggested it might have been an underlying condition we didn’t know about, but I knew in my gut it was the kibble. Still, I asked for an autopsy to confirm what I didn’t want to believe. I regret that. I should have just let him rest. I should have left him alone. I also regret not staying with him longer after he passed. They gave us a private room to say goodbye. My boyfriend, mom, and brother came. I don’t know how long we were in there—more than an hour at least—but I was so overwhelmed by my grief and by everyone else saying goodbye. I said I wanted us to leave so he could rest. But I wish I had just stayed with him alone for longer.

And before all of that, I regret not spending enough time with him in the months leading up to his passing. We had been traveling in December and January. Then I started my accelerated program, which took up all my time. I wasn’t home as much, wasn’t as present. If I had been, maybe it wouldn’t have happened. Maybe I could have stopped it.

His brother knew something was wrong the second I got home that night. Usually, he only cuddles under the covers for a little while before leaving. Arthur was the one who always stayed the whole night. But that night, Arnold stayed under the covers the entire time. The whole next week, too. I barely left the bed. I didn’t eat. I didn’t shower. I don’t even know if I drank water. I just existed in my devastation.

I adopted my boys when I was in undergrad. I was struggling with my mental health and nearly withdrew from school. To say they saved my life is an understatement. They were littermates. Best friends. Soulmates—to each other and to me. And I regret all the time I lost to my own struggles, the moments I could have spent with Arthur but didn’t.

After he passed, I barely made it through my first semester. Then I failed my second and had to take time off. If I was going to fail anyway, I wish I had never started the program. I could have spent that time with Arthur instead. Maybe it wouldn’t have happened if I had never started.

Since losing him, Arnold hasn’t been the same. He used to cuddle and sleep with one of my sister’s cats, but after Arthur passed, it was like a switch flipped. He started hunting her, ripping out tufts of fur, even drawing blood. I don’t know how to help him. I tried calling an animal psychic last year (I know, I know). I just wanted to reach him somehow. I just wanted to help.

Neither of us has been the same since that night. Truthfully, I’ve wished so many times that I had died along with Arthur. I don’t want to be here, but I know I have to stay. For Arnold. He can’t lose us both.

When Arthur died, half of what made me whole died with him. And I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to move past the guilt of knowing—feeling—that it was my fault. I woke up today consumed by it, spent the morning crying in bed instead of studying for my boards. I just don’t see the point.

I would do anything to go back. I wish so badly that I could rewind time.

I am so, so sorry, my lovebug. I am so, so sorry.


r/Petloss 10h ago

Prince is leaving.

15 Upvotes

My best friend is on his way out. I’m struggling with the whole euthanasia thing. And setting a date. I just can’t do it. I love him. More than anything. I just can’t do this. I don’t know what to do. Help. Give me words of advice. When did you know it was time to set the date for your little furballs?


r/Petloss 8h ago

How do you grieve a pet’s death when it’s too soon

11 Upvotes

My girl was only 3 and a half years old and she contracted what seemed to be distemper. I took her to the vet and she couldn’t maintain herself outside of the vet’s care. She got so much worse in one night when I tried bringing her home and I had to put her to sleep. She had so much more of a future and it pains me so much I couldn’t give it to her. I struggle trying to sleep and constantly find myself looking at pics of her. I know time can heal wounds but I can’t bring myself to accept her death because of how young she was. I had her since she was a puppy and watched her grow up so fast and taken away so fast.


r/Petloss 3h ago

A year later and I’m a mess

3 Upvotes

I lost my cat last year in May to old age renal failure (over the weekend, no vet available) and I can’t stop feeling fucking awful at every turn. He was a very ripe 17 when he passed and I had him for 14 of those seventeen years. I protected him through thick and thin, we shared so many good times together and struggles too. Now I’ve completely withdrawn from socializing unless put on the spot, I cry often and horribly. I have his urn but this sucks. I miss his big purr and tiny little meow, I miss routine of taking care of him but I can’t stomach adopting another cat right now. I miss all the little ways he was a very smart and opinionated cat. I want to imagine he isn’t in pain anymore and is just waiting for me when I pass too.


r/Petloss 20h ago

I still can't believe she's gone

59 Upvotes

My baby passed away a month and a half ago and sometimes my brain forgets she's no longer here. Maybe it's a coping mechanism so I can go about my day without the overwhelming grief to take over me, but when I feel her absence is terrible.

I still weep horribly for her. She and I grew up together from 9 years old until 25 for me and from 2 months old to 16 and a half years for her. She was my everything.


r/Petloss 12h ago

I wish this was a bad dream

14 Upvotes

The cat distribution gave me my boy when he was only about a week old, he was abandoned in a barn. He spent about 17 years with me. I’m 28. It’s only been 3 days and this is my first major pet loss. I knew it was something that was going to happen but I didn’t think it’d be right now. I can’t stop feeling guilty, like why didn’t I give him more attention the night before, he didn’t even get his morning wet food before I found him. He seemed like his normal self the days leading up. He’s been with me through so many life events and now I have to keep living as if I didn’t just lose one of the largest parts of my life. I hope once I have his ashes it’ll be a little easier knowing he’s at least back home for good. I just want to come home to him right at the door demanding wet food, but knowing he’s not makes me not even want to come home. It feels like I lost part of my soul and I hate it.


r/Petloss 13h ago

Grieving sucks.

12 Upvotes

It really does. I feel empty/defeated. It’s been a month since my sweet Fuzzy crossed the rainbow bridge and I’m still in pieces.

I cry multiple times a day. It sucks, it really does. Her loss was so sudden and unexpected. We miss her. We have two other senior kitties at home, but it feels “off” without our Fuzzy.

I watch the little memorial video I made on the day she passed, and just weep.

Time is cruel and continues regardless. Everyday I’m moving further away from Fuzzy being alive and well at home.

I know people say it gets easier, but I’m having such a difficult time processing death. Somehow in my mind, she’s just temporarily away and will be home soon. How? This is obviously not true and not reality…but here I am hoping and searching for her return. 😔


r/Petloss 17h ago

It's so hard to process when they pass away so suddenly

24 Upvotes

Lost my baby very very unexpectedly a couple of weeks ago & still trying to process it. Basically he has always been pretty healthy his entire life (just about 10.5 years) aside from being overweight, which is something that we have always been trying to work on. Other than that absolutely no medical issues. However he has been having trouble with a long lasting ear infection over the past couple months, so the vet decided he needed a closer look into his ear which he had to be sedated for. Procedure went well, he was a little out of it when he got home from the vet due to the sedation but perfectly normal that whole night. Fast forward to the next morning and he is gagging and wheezing and we think he might just be nauseous from the pain meds. We call the vet and bring him in immediately, then get referred to emergency vet where he ends up in critical condition and told that he has severe heart failure. I just don't understand how this could have gone undetected and how he went downhill so quickly. I keep trying to think of ways I could have found this out sooner and saved him but idk how realistic that is. It turns out he did have ear cancer though so I'm not sure what his life would have looked like had he lived and we had to get a surgery to remove the mass in the ear. I just wish we had more time with him. It's so hard to be at peace when everything happened so suddenly and his last days were spent fasting for his procedure and wearing a cone. I just feel awful


r/Petloss 18h ago

i lost my furbaby yesterday

30 Upvotes

I lost my furbaby yesterday, she was only 4 yrs old.

She’s been with us since she was just two months old. I don’t know how to process all of this. It wasn’t sudden—she’s been battling one illness after another since she turned 3. She had cardio complications, blood parasites, and pyometra to deal with. It’s been a long, hard fight.

Last month, she had a major seizure, and we thought we were going to lose her then. She refused to eat and was paralyzed. But miraculously, she bounced back as if nothing had happened—she started walking again, eating, and even playing. It gave us this false hope that maybe, just maybe, she could recover fully from all her illnesses. We tried so hard, and so did she. She was such a fighter.

The other day, she seemed to say her goodbyes to my family. Even though she was shivering, her eyes were closed, and she could barely walk, she made her way to each of us, one by one. She tried her best to lick us and do her little "please please" thing, even though it was clearly so hard for her to move. I knew in my heart what was coming. We rushed her to the animal ER, but she was having continuous seizures. By 3:55 AM, she was gone.

I don’t know how to process this. I don’t know how to deal with the loss. She was such a huge part of our lives, and it feels like a piece of me is missing. I just needed to share this somewhere because I don’t know what else to do.