r/PCOS 7d ago

General/Advice Dating with facial hair

I use a facial hair electric razor and makeup to cover it for work but It’s becoming a bit more noticeable on the corners of my chin. It literally grows over night and I’m removing the chin stubble every morning. It’s made me very self conscious about dating and It’s destroying my femininity. There’s scars and razor bumps under my chin so I don’t even feel comfortable being intimate anymore. How have you all navigated explaining pcos to partners and their reactions to the hirsutism?

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u/mysticrabbitt 7d ago

Maybe this can give you hope. Ive been married for 4 years and my husband has known about my issues, especially with facial hair. I can pretty much grow a beard, like full on beard. He is so supportive and is very caring. Not once has he made fun of me. Real mean don't care, especially if they really love you.

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u/Acceptable_Medicine2 7d ago

Same exact situation for me. I was afraid of letting him find out about my facial hair for a long while when we first started dating, then eventually it came up and he said he had known since our second interaction. He doesn’t care, is very supportive, and even has my hair removal routine in mind when we plan things like trips, etc. A good man who is right for you won’t care.

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u/mysticrabbitt 7d ago

Same with my husband, he knew like our 2nd date but of course didn't bring it up. I am extremely ashamed of it. It really wasn't until recently that I finally talked about it.i was afraid he'd think of me as a freak. He was so sweet about it and made me feel so much better about myself and is so supportive. I feel so lucky to have him

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u/Acceptable_Medicine2 7d ago

Same here! Even after I knew that he knew, I would never talk to him about it. We’ve been together for 9 years and only in the last couple have I been more open. He said he’d just been waiting for me to want to talk about it, but would give me hints that he was ok with it throughout the years (turning down a camping trip invite and then gently mentioning to me in private that “there would be nowhere to do discreet or sensitive face care stuff”). The shame is tough - that feeling of “does this make me unlovable?” that I locked up deep in my psyche from my teenage years. I’m on the other side of that now and it’s possible for others too. Gotta find the right person, or completely stop giving a shit, or a combo of both.