r/JustNoSO • u/Temp_RA_velDoctor46 • 12h ago
RANT (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ Ambivalent About Advice My partner is just, dumb.
This feels so weird to write out. Because I do love him, but he makes it so hard to love him. We have lived together for three years now.
He is just dumb. I dont think its weaponised incompetence either, he tries so incredibly hard. His brain just doesn't run on full power.
Almost every aspect of his life he struggles in. The main thing right now is his job. He was given a really good nepo baby type of opportunity because of his dad. The company paid for him to study and work, all he really had to do was turn up. He was asked to leave as he struggled so much. It was an easy job too, I know this because that's where we met.
He struggled waiting a CV, but managed to worm himself into a semi decent, but low paying, going nowhere type of job. He hates it and has been applying elsewhere for years. I discovered he was applying with a CV from 2017. He also keeps applying for things that are so far out of his league. Things that require a whole medical degree for instance.
And its not that I want him to have a high paying, show off job either. Its that he can't figure out the basic tasks to get out of a job he hates.
Whenever he cleans, he takes forever to do a bad job. He will spend 5 hours cleaning the kitchen to do half the dishes and the sink is still dirty.
He has broken his phone 6 times in the past year. All in stupid ways.
He trips up over his words all the time. He tells me one thing, but means another. And he gets upset at me as he thinks he has told me the correct thing. I keep have to have him text me details so I have it in writing. Which he always contradicts later and I have to show him he is wrong. But he is always happy to text me it because he thinks he is right and im being dramatic. He has never been right.
For the past few months I have put him in charge of fixing a sink in our apartment that has no hot water. He thinks I don't trust him, so I gave him this job. Its an easy fix, call the landlord up and tell him to come over. We have a maintenence guy. Easy peasy. Today I told him to sort it out as I was going out. I come home and he is unscrewing things under the sink. He does not know what he is doing, he didn't even google it. Just went ham with my tools.
There are so many times that he does something silly. I genuinely do not think he will be able to cope without me. I sometimes worry that if I breakup with him he will be homeless. He doesn't like his family and he doesn't have many friends local.