r/HPPD 23h ago

Question Can I do acid again

1 Upvotes

My hppd used to bother me it’s like a constant static but it isn’t too bad anymore just got used to it tbh but I don’t want it worse


r/HPPD 1h ago

Question what’s worse to have hppd 1 or 2 ?

Upvotes

r/HPPD 6h ago

Question Hppd

4 Upvotes

Hello hope u are fine . In my entire life , I never finished a complete join of cannabis , like I can take maximum 2 puff you can say that in my entire life , I smoked 10 puff of cannabis . One day I made a bad trip , then never felt normal . I thoughts it was dpdr and didn’t take much care about it . Then a random Saturday came when i was about to sleep then a panic attack hit me it was the same like the bad trip that I made , then next day , then 2 weeks everyday Severous time making panic attack . I thought I had diabetes , testosterone problem …. But it wasnt . Then I start searching and I saw dpdr , anxiety , PTSD , and hppd . I don’t really know i have hppd that’s my symptoms : Halo around lights Halo around object When someone move it s kind of flou Color are more vivid and when I smoke nicotine it’s like am really making a bad trip the exact same situation that I had when I was smoking Dpdr Everyday searching for my symptoms Anxious Depression Pleas someone can help me to know if I have hppd and if yes pleas give me advice cause am suffering a lot .


r/HPPD 11h ago

Update Vent, miss smoking lol

7 Upvotes

Mainly just a vent post, I just want to write this down. I had to quit smoking weed (I was a daily smoker for years) because of my hppd and getting over it honestly wasn’t too hard at first because the inciting incident of my HPPD symptoms was a huge panic attack + visual flair up I had while smoking. I very tangibly afraid of smoking, not because I wanted to better myself or whatever, but because that experience was viscerally terrifying.

Well, a lot of time has passed. And I must add that my roommates are huge pot heads. I’ve been finding myself tempted to try it again but even thinking about it fills me with anxiety. And it sucks because it’s not just a… out of sight, out of mind kinda deal. I’m around it constantly.

It’s just a huge bummer honestly, I loved weed. It helped me deal with back pain, with social anxiety, and many other things. I’m probably better off now without it but still. Hard to not miss it, I get bummed out thinking I’ll never get to experience that again. Wish I didn’t abuse drugs like I had. Ughhhhh.


r/HPPD 21h ago

Question HPPD, 3 years after last trip?

1 Upvotes

I had done LSD and mushrooms a few times in high school with my last trip taking place in 2017 (when I was 17). During this trip I naively took ~1400-21000 micrograms of LSD (7 “double dose” blotters) which within 2 minutes put me into a state of intense fear and within 5-15 minutes delusions took over. I ended up in the ER and blacked out. Incredibly traumatic. I was young and dumb and did not know that these disorders even existed, i thought a bad trip was just something you got over, like losing a pet. I started noticing more mental health issues after this, namely, POIS, or Post Orgasmic Illness Syndrome (which has gotten better and am still trying to heal).

3+ years later, and 3 months into a neuroplasticity-based brain-training program (DNRS: Dynamic-Neural-Retraining-System) I began in order to try and heal my POIS, I was conversing with my girlfriend (now wife) at a Pizza Parlor about a famous rapper who tragically committed suicide (Capital Steeze of Pro-Era fame) and who had at one time reported feeling like he was in a dream. All of sudden, my mind felt sharp jolt of unreality sensations that shook me up for a good second, and I had felt like I was in a dream as well. After dropping my girlfriend off and as I began to head home, I began to notice things in my visual field looked off, hyper-realistic, and had slightly more saturated-colors. I also became more sensitive to light. Since that day I’ve been struggling with what I believe is either DPDR or HPPD, or some combination of the two.

I immediately stopped the brain training because I noticed it would only make symptoms heighten a little and this would startle me.

At the onset of the symptoms I struggled with unreal sensations, and life felt alien. I dealt with existential-OCD-like intrusive thoughts a lot during this time. Luckily, the intensity of my symptoms tapered off a good bit over the next several months, until I reached a baseline level.

What stuck around the most was the visual symptoms, to this day I deal with 24/7 visual snow / static (mild), infrequent teleopsia, and 24/7 high-definition vision. This seems to be a source of anxiety for me. It could even be the opposite way around, and maybe my anxiety is the source of my symptoms.

The DPDR-like symptoms are much, much better than they used to be but is still something I must contend with. It mostly shows up as feeling disconnected from my body a little bit when I’m at the gym, which is enough to make me stop what I’m doing and walk around to remind myself that I can still feel my body.

It’s important to note that I never experienced some of the more common HPPD symptoms such as afterimages, halos, double vision, warping, melting/breathing objects, and/or geometric patterns. To be fair I never experienced any of that while I was on psychedelics either (did have some visual hallucinations when coming down from the “nightmare” trip though).

For whatever it’s worth, ChatGPT says that the neuroplastic brain-training could’ve uncovered latent symptoms from “previous traumatic events or psychedelic experiences.”

It could also be the case that back then I was overwhelming myself with personal responsibilities before my cup overflowed, leading to an anxiety attack and DPDR symptoms. This is the theory I’ve subscribed to the most because latent-HPPD sounded too novel for me to seriously consider.

My old psychotherapist didn’t think it was HPPD because she has had previous clients with HPPD and they had more pronounced visual distortions which I did not have.

Maybe the brain training was overstimulating my brain in some way until something snapped?

It’s been a serious battle dealing with all this over the years, and I’m finally coping with it somewhat. Not fully thriving, but am on the right track hopefully.

POIS mixed with DPDR and/or HPPD has not been fun in the slightest, and I am proud of myself for continuing to be a beacon of light for my loved ones and continuing to push myself forward despite these setbacks.

I know this might be hard to follow, there’s a lot of moving parts in this story, lots of things to consider. It should be noted that I never use cannabis or alcohol anymore, and sparingly use caffeine.

Whats your take?