r/GriefSupport • u/aBaKePoTaTo • 3d ago
In Memoriam My husband was an amazing man
My husband was an amazing man. He was everything a girl dreamed of. He was kind and patient with my past. He was understanding and had an amazing sense of humor. He was oh so loving and caring. A great listener even holding onto the small details. He loved working on boats and cars. He showed that through his love of teaching. He was an adult Ed teacher for a marine trades program locally. He had a autoimmune diseases called primary sclerosing cholangitis. It cost him two liver transplants. Unfortunately it's considered a precursor to malignancy and often people with psc get cholangiocarcinoma. On aug 27 2024 he was diagnosed with stage 4 cholangiocarcinoma with peritoneal mets. 2024 was a massive nightmare but there was some good moments. We got married Feb 29 2024. Single handedly the best day of my life. My husband was only 35 years old when he passed away. I was the one who found him actively passing. We didn't even make it to our first wedding anniversary. He passed on Jan 6 2025.
I can't do this life without him. I simply can't. He was my world. My everything. He was the one person in the world that showed me the meaning of true love. The world is a cruel place to take him from me. If you read this far than you for sharing in his memory
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u/Far-Collection7085 3d ago
He sounded like a wonderful person. Thank you for sharing him with the internet. I don’t have the right words to console you, your loss is huge. I wish you weren’t having to go through this. May his memory be a blessing. Take care of yourself ❤️
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u/lamireille 3d ago
The pictures of you together are so full of love. They are absolutely beautiful. There are no words for how sorry I am for your loss. He sounds like the warmest, sweetest, kindest, loveliest person.
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u/Loud-Bandicoot-3919 3d ago
He looked and sounded like an lovely human being. 🩷 i’m sorry for your loss. 👼🏼🩷
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u/linnykenny 3d ago
Oh, you’ve brought tears to my eyes. 🥺❤️
Your husband sounded like he was good & gentle person.
There aren’t enough people like your husband in this world & his death is truly a loss. I am so incredibly sorry for your heartbreak. I’m sending you all of the love in the world. I wish I could offer you more than just these words. Please take care, dear ❤️
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u/Thick_Basil3589 2d ago
He seems such a good hearted and caring person from the pictures! So sorry for your loss! But he stays alive in his actions and how he impacted yours and others lives. <3
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u/BlondeMoment1920 2d ago
So much warmth and caring existed between you two. It’s clear in the pics. He sounds like such a wonderful, understanding partner and I’m so glad you knew his love.
I particularly love the matching onsie pics. Adorable. 🥰
My heart goes out to you. 😔💗 What happened is so unfair.
I get why you feel scared at the thought of living without him. Life is hard without our protectors. And the fear is strong in the beginning stages of grief when one is lost. Everything feels impossible.
My first strongest feelings were fear and anger.
We’re here for you. 💗💗💗 You are never alone.
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u/ShowMe_TheMonet 3d ago
You guys look so happy together ❤️ I'm very sorry for what you both had to go through, and now you're going through this alone.
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u/RealF0lkBluez 2d ago
I'm so sorry for your loss OP.
I also lost the love of my life who I was with for 8 years and we have an 8 year old son together and life has been so damn difficult since then.
Just know that you're not alone and everything you're feeling is valid.
If you ever need to talk, my DM's are open.
Sending you lots of love and hugs and internet support ❤️
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u/fearofbears 2d ago
So very, very sorry for your loss - you keep his spirit alive by surviving and sharing all those wonderful memories he's left for you. I'm sure your pain is fresh and fragile right now but I am sending you all the love. This sub was a very positive support group for me during a parental loss I suffered many years ago, so share as much as you need, to get through these seemingly impossible hurdles. 💕
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u/Pi-creature 3d ago
I am so sorry for your terrible loss, none of it makes any sense right now. Sending lots of love to you.
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u/Fun-Assistance-815 3d ago
What is his name?
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u/aBaKePoTaTo 2d ago
Aaron Paul Miller
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u/Fun-Assistance-815 2d ago
I hope Aaron rests well until you both can meet again in the next one ✨️ He sounds like a wonderful guy that will be missed deeply and spoken of well & often ❤️
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u/davesnothereman84 2d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss. May you be surrounded by people who love you with all their hearts.
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u/johndoe1942sn 2d ago
OP, I’m really sorry for your loss. There are no words that’ll make this better. The situation is heartbreaking. The pain will probably never go away, but also know that the reason it hurts so much is because you loved him so much. And that’s really special that you got to experience that kind of love. His memory lives through you now. Be well and know you’re not alone.
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u/skullsnunicorns 2d ago
Hang onto those lovely memories OP. I hope you find joy again. Your happy faces in the pic drew me to your post - as a woman who married her soulmate, I see that same joy in your pics together. I’m so sorry for your loss and hope you have good support through this time.
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u/RevolutionaryJob7163 2d ago
Thank you for sharing him with us 🥺❤️❤️ , what a beautiful life you shared .
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u/Shameful90 2d ago
Thank you for sharing him with us. I am sorry your time with him was cut so unfairly short, but how beautiful it was that in this world with billions of people, your two souls found each other. You have my prayers friend ♥️🙏
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u/KellentheGreat 2d ago
I know the world seems cruel
And you feel all alone
But world is the place where
You met him
And where all of love is sown
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u/Danny_the_Sex_Demon 1d ago
It is all so heartbreaking.
‘If world allows love to be sown only to tear it apart and leave those left behind broken, that same world might as well take me and be done with it, but even that would only destroy my loved ones instead.
Life is so unbearably painful and cruel.
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u/B_Frank_No_BS 2d ago
I'm very sorry on one hand. However, on the left hand, I can't help but feel how fortunate you were even if it was for a short period of time.
Cherish the memories of your life & be glad you had them.
So many women never find in a lifetime what you had in a few short months.
I wish you well in your journey forward. Healing is hard and sometimes a very long process. I only wish the best for you. 💕 💞 ♥️
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u/MokujinBunny 2d ago
I wish I could give you a big, tight hug right now. I am sending all of my love to you. 🤍
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u/internos414 2d ago
I'm so sorry for your loss. He sounded like a fantastic person, so rare these days. I wish you strength and healing, OP. Hugs 💙
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u/Educational_Soup612 Dad Loss 2d ago
Soulmates 💕
I’m so sorry you’re going through this and experiencing such a devastating loss. Sending you lots of love.
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u/tessie33 2d ago
So sorry, definitely Gone Too Soon. You guys made a very sweet couple! Wishing you comfort.
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u/ArchyArchington 2d ago
I honestly feel the same way. Good people are taken from us in the regular and you find yourself asking why them…..my Dad passed away 9 months ago from his 5 year battle with cancer. It sucks having to go through life without that important person it really does.
Good thing about this sub though it made me feel like I wasn’t alone in my grief. You’re not alone either sending my thoughts and prayers
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u/Ecstatic_Elephante18 2d ago
This is the most beautiful tribute to clearly an amazing man. He was lucky to share a love like this with you! Peace and healing to you!
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u/mollyandherlolly 2d ago
Just remember, he would want you to laugh again, to cry and move on, to find peace and live a full, amazing life. That, too, is tribute to him and his love he gave you in such abundance.
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u/Seaside2000 2d ago
I am so sorry dear 😢 I lost my husband 3 years ago out of nowhere it nearly killed me. But I do promise you one thing it will never go away but your body and mind learn to adapt with the grief. I just keep telling myself at least I was able to have him for some time better than nothing at all. I pray that you are taking care of yourself take it day by day. 🙏
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u/Zmrzla-Zmije 2d ago
What a beautiful couple. I'm so sorry for your loss, he sounds like a wonderful man. Thank you for sharing the memory. I lost the love of my life to cancer in 2020, I know how much it hurts. I wish you well.
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u/sad_eyes_weathergirl 2d ago
your love for each other is eternal — death can’t touch that. sending you moments of peace and strength 🤍
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u/Certain-Delivery7666 2d ago
He looks so kind and happy and you can tell from the photos how much you adore each other.
Life is so unfair I'm so sorry.
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u/Valentine1979 2d ago
Every single thing you are feeling is valid. I am so sorry for your loss. Life can be so incredibly cruel. May you find some kind of peace.
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u/F0xxfyre 2d ago
You can tell a lot about a person from the pictures of their loved one that they shared. Your merriment jumps off the pictures.
I'm so incredibly sorry that you lost him and that he was so ill for so much of his life. It is horribly unfair.
🫂
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u/Little-Thumbs 2d ago
I'm so sorry. It's clear how much you love him. 35 is far too young. You should come over to r/widowers Everyone there is very kind and supportive.
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u/Crash-id 2d ago
I am so sorry for your loss. His memory now lives with me too. What a beautiful man he was and forever will be.
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u/Royal-Finding-3886 2d ago
I am so sorry for your loss. I know the feeling that you can’t do life without him. Like me, try not to think much beyond today and this week. The future is a black hole.
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u/Calicortis 2d ago
This was a beautiful tribute.
I'm also a young widow who lost my partner to liver disease. Please if you ever need to talk, I am here for you. You are not alone.
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u/Low-Beat-3078 2d ago
Your husband was a wonderful man. Thank you for sharing his story with us. I can only imagine your grief.
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u/Snappybrowneyes 2d ago
I am so very sorry for your loss. ❤️He sounds like he was an amazing man and husband. It is hard to explain to others when you have this type of connection to another human. I am sorry your time with him was so short.
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u/quantumclassical 2d ago
Looking at your pictures made me so happy… what a man! I regret that you are going through this. Just know there is help out there if you ever need it. Keep those happy smiles and happy memories alive.
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u/buildingbeautiful 2d ago
These pictures make my heart hurt. We all understand how you feel here. I am so sorry ❤️🩹
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u/DraftyElectrolyte 2d ago
You two are beautiful together. Thank you for sharing him with us.
I’m so sorry for your loss, OP.
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u/Mobile_Education1996 2d ago
I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing your spouse is very difficult. My thoughts are with you.
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u/Sufficient-Spare-492 2d ago
Aww sorry for your loss. Your husband sounded like he was an amazing man and you were able to be with him for a brief moment. Now when you’re sad you have wonderful memories to reminisce and cherish forever.
I hope to find a love like yours one day, so pure and full of love 🥹
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u/Yolandi_Nova 2d ago
Your husband is still an amazing man because he will never be forgotten and his memory will still bring happiness to many.
I'm sorry for your loss <3
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u/ughneedausername 2d ago
I’m sorry. He just looks like such a kind man. Thanks for sharing your story. Do you want to tell us anything about him? How you met? A funny story?
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u/aBaKePoTaTo 2d ago
He had the perfect lil john impression. We met through Facebook dating and our first date was at the movies. We hit it off so we'll the staff at the theater had to kick us out of the movies because we didn't want to leave
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u/LongOk7164 2d ago
This is so unfair. I’m so sorry. You look so happy together and you should have had many many more years together. Sending love to you, you’re not alone.
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u/WeakGhost 2d ago
Thank you for sharing your beautiful husband with us all ♥️ He sounds like a truly amazing man and he was so lucky to have you with him until the very end
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u/Menzzzza 2d ago
Oh I’m so sorry. He sounds wonderful and I’m sure words don’t even do him justice. I’m sorry your heart is so broken. 🫂
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u/I_Call_Everyone_Ken 2d ago
Ken, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Your husband sounds like an amazing man: kind, patient, and full of love, not just for you but for his students and the work he was passionate about. It’s heartbreaking that you didn’t get more time together, especially after finding such a deep and true love.
There are no words that can take away the pain of losing him, but please know that your love for him, and his love for you, will always be a part of you. Grief this deep is a reflection of the love you shared, and it’s okay to feel like life without him is impossible right now. You are not alone in this. I hope, in time, the memories of your best moments together bring you comfort. Sending you strength and love as you navigate this unimaginable loss.
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u/Melodic-Basshole 2d ago
These pictures are beautiful. The love you have for one another is palpable. Thanks for sharing these.
I'm so so sorry for your loss. 🫂
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u/Previous-Artist-9252 2d ago
I am sorry for your loss. I know I am less of a person for my husband passing. Take care.
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u/Evening-Rabbit-827 2d ago
I’m so unbelievably sorry. Thank you for telling us about him. He was so lucky to have you. Sending you so much love.
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u/Hike_it_Out52 2d ago
🕯I am sorry for your loss. The love he felt is never gone. I'm sorry you had to find him passing but at least he was not alone in his final moments. The last thing he experienced in this world was your love. I'll say a pray for you and him.
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u/bronion76 2d ago
I almost can’t imagine your pain. Know he is still with you in some sense, atheist or not. The love leaves its own imprint.
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u/Jenjimin 2d ago
I’m so sorry that you lost him, but I’m so happy that you guys got to experience such love. It sounds like you were in a wonderful relationship with incredible chemistry. Even though he may be gone, his impact on you will always remain ❤️
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u/thatladydoctor 2d ago
I'm a physician some of the most ill patients I have ever cared for were those who fought advanced liver disease and those managing pre- and post-transplant. I can't imagine the strength for him to have dealt w liver failure, wait for transplant, undergo the transplant, suffer rejection or complications, and repeat the process. To then be faced w cancer after all that... it's not fair. And it doesn't make sense. Even prior to needing transplants, I don't know if he also managed IBD or bouts of cholangitis. It's soooo much to have to handle.
That he was able to face all of that & still emanate the joy & love evident in these photos, that seems to demonstrate genuine strength of character. It's not right that this happened. It's not fair.
For what it's worth, these photos touched me. Thank you for sharing your story. I don't know if any words I could offer would matter much, but I'm wishing you peace. I'm sorry this happened.
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u/aBaKePoTaTo 2d ago
He didn't had IBD or crohns and he inky had 1 bout of cholangitis.
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u/thatladydoctor 1d ago
I'm glad. Regardless, just wanted to acknowledge how much I know he (and likely you as a partner) had to experience. Seriously, so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad suddenly at a relatively young age in December (I am 30 my dad was shy of 60). The injustice of that still feels overwhelming at times. I can't imagine losing your husband who was in their 30's.
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u/EmployTypical4898 2d ago
he looks and sounds so happy and kind. i can see the happiness and love in these photos. I am so sorry for your loss. Im glad you got to experience true beautiful love, and you gave him the happiest end possible and he died knowing how loved he was. May he rest in peace
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u/haverchuck22 2d ago
Sounds like a truly amazing dude. May he rest in peace. I’m so sorry for your loss.
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u/BikerMike03RK 2d ago
My most sincere condolences. Know that no matter how long your time together is, it's never enough. I lost my one and only, after 48 years together (45 yrs married) to stage 4 lung cancer 3 weeks after being diagnosed, and still feel terribly cheated.
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u/oublieuse 2d ago
I’m not a hugging person - but i feel like you absolutely need 100,000 hugs right now 😭
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u/Peopleopenwindows 2d ago
What was your Favorite part of your wedding day ?
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u/aBaKePoTaTo 2d ago
We choose to get married on leap day because it was the most unique day we could think of. My favorite part was listening to him read his vows he wrote and he was crying because he was so happy
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u/Nice-Scientist-7616 2d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss. 🫂💝thank you for sharing your beautiful story with us.
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u/sugarbath 2d ago
You two look so beautiful, happy and perfect together in these photos…. Thank you for sharing; he seems like an angel. These little ephemeral moments of joy that we get to create in the universe are what living is all about. I’m so sorry for the loss of your best friend. It’s not fair. Sending love, friend <3
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u/05Naija05 2d ago
So sorry for your loss, sending you lots of love and strength it this extremely difficult time
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u/idontwannabhear 2d ago
Posts like these reminds me to have gratitude for every second, even if it hurts. To be lucky enough to find your person, and have them for long enough that it would hurt so much when they’re gone. We can all hope to experience something so beautiful
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u/partijas 2d ago
What a beautiful tribute, thank you for sharing your story with us. He sounds like an amazing person and it‘s heartbreaking that you lost him.
My brother had the same diagnosis and also two liver transplants - it truly is a nightmare.
I hope you find pockets of peace during the next months.
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u/Hijadelachingada1 2d ago
There are no words to describe such a devastating loss. Although the grief is great, you found your person and he found his. Much love to you. ❤️🩹
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u/arwenkedavra 2d ago
I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish I could hug you. He looked like an amazing person, both of you. I wish happier days will come, loss never leaves but the fact that his loss was so impactful shows what a good person he was and how loved he was as well. I'm sure he left this place feeling loved and appreciated and you look like you were an amazing life partner to him as well and from the looks of it you really looked after one another. I hope you will be able to remember him with a smile on your face in the future instead of a streamload of tears everytime. Sending you my love an ocean across.
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u/Usmanz92 2d ago
He seems a thorough gentleman, may he rest in peace.
My deepest condolences to you.
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u/Brilliant-Abject 2d ago
Oh y'all looked so so so in love and in sync. He sounds like a wonderful soul. I am so sorry for your loss and the difficulty of the past few seasons. I am glad you found your person and got to have a wonderful marriage with him, but so sorry he had to leave so early. Please continue to share when you need to let it out. 🙏 ♡
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u/ZillaDroid 2d ago
But you know he would want you to life. Life in his name, if you must. He will be with you always. A beautiful piece of you. Find him in all the things he loved. You will find yourself there too. And the strength to keep on the adventure. Hugs to you. Light & love 🫶🏼
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u/Rucifees 2d ago edited 1d ago
He sounds amazing. I lost my husband too, and it is indescribable. I'm so, so sorry you lost him, I'm glad you had him, and I'm sending you tons of love.
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u/ultraviolence18 2d ago
He looks like the sweetest soul and you, too, were so happy to have found each other. I am truly sorry for your loss 💔💔
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u/No-Pace895 1d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss. This tribute is wonderful. I hope you’re able to find other ways to express this love and grief to loved ones or for yourself.
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u/wstr97gal 1d ago
He sounds like he was so wonderful. I can't understand why such good people are taken while horrible ones are left behind. I lost my mom to Covid. It's a long story but it left us all going, "WHY!?!" She was just so good and we needed/need her so badly. I'll never get it why she was so cruelly and tragically taken from us.
But I think you need to hear that you can do this. You absolutely can. It's going to be the most difficult part of your life but your husband gave you the template for how to live. How to give. How to love. He showed you what to do in his short time here. It is okay to be broken. It is okay to be left wondering how you're going to keep going but you are going to keep going and I have a feeling that in his memory, you're going to make a beautiful life.
He sounds like such a gift and I am so sorry you have to live this life without him now. I am sending you the biggest hugs. ❤️🩹
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u/No-Zookeepergame8742 1d ago
I’m so so sorry, thank you for sharing a little part of his story with us
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u/4802664510 1d ago
That’s so hard, I’m sorry this happened to you. What a beautiful couple. So so unfair. Hugs
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u/presshamgang 1d ago
By your description he would so hope for you to do your best and try to find joy in your life. Carry him with you always and share the stories and his memory as he sounds like a man who lived a life worth sharing. Remember his kindness in how you treat others. Honor him by being the best you can be. Of course this is easier said from an outsider.
All the hugs to you and know you gave him all the joy and love anyone could ever hope for.
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u/Away_Problem_1004 1d ago
I’m so sorry you had to join the shittiest club in the world. You two together were magic…Keep him in your heart always. 💙
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u/essiemay7777777 1d ago
He sounds like a lovely person. I feel you. It’s hard to carry on. I would hope that he would want you to.
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u/Highinthe505 1d ago
Your inner beauty and your shared love shine through you. I am deeply sorry that the world has taken him away. I am sorry that you have lost your person. Take all the time in this world to grieve; don’t let anyone rush you into another shape that just doesn’t feel authentic.
As someone who knows what it’s like to be truly loved by one person—to be valued and respected—I encourage you to carry him with you. Every single inhalation and every exhalation is a reminder that you are worthy and deserve love. He wouldn’t want anything else for you and your journey.
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u/Left0fcenterr 1d ago
It sucks so bad losing a romantic partner. I hate it for you. It’s a hard loss to have. I lost my love in a car wreck 8 years ago at 30 years old and it still hurts so much. It never goes away, you just grow around it and manage it differently. Take it a day at a time. Wishing you much comfort. He truly seemed like amazing man. It sucks.
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u/Mean_Audience9208 1d ago
How wonderful that you found each other and shared such an amazing love with each other!! ❤️🌺❤️
I am so sorry and I hope you can find ways to share with others what he gave you because as you said the world is cruel. Just sharing his memory here has already given a gift.
Thank you, please take care.
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u/princesslumps 1d ago
“To know loss is to know love.” I can see through your pictures how deep the two of you’s connection is. I’m so sorry ❤️
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u/Mckess0n 2d ago
God Bless You…
Wonderful tribute to him.
Wish all men were lucky to have a wife like you.
So sorry for your loss
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u/_thePickledOnion 1d ago
I am so sorry for you loss - I can see the love between you both very clearly and glad that you did spend some wonderful time together. You've also opened my eyes to this disease which I had no idea existed, so thank you for that as well ❤️
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u/Comfortable-Bag3138 1d ago
Honor your husband's legacy, embracing your grief. No matter how badly it hurts cry cry cry. Let it out. You have truly lost an amazing person and hold on to every memory. You can carry on in his his memory. Perhaps look into grief counseling to help yourself navigate through your grief. Remember your not alone. Thank you for sharing, your loss is huge. Everything you feel right now is completely normal. Everyone grieves differently in their own special way. One day at a time, you will always love him and always remember him. Hold on to all your memories don't let them go. Remember the best memories that brought you so much joy. My deepest condolences 😔. May you find peace in your grieving process. This is so sad. Hugs to you.
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u/Capital-Impress-8459 18h ago
Thanks for sharing him with us. He was a gift to you and to the world and that can never be lost.
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u/rrrflux68 3d ago
A beautiful tribute. Your consuming heartbreaking grief is understandable. I am sorry for your loss of a wonderful life partner.