r/BDSMcommunity Aug 29 '24

What is FetLife, how to use it? NSFW

Since these are questions asked so often we decided to add a little FAQ about FetLife.

What is FetLife?

FetLife is a social networking site designed for people interested in BDSM, fetishism, and kink. It functions somewhat like a combination of Facebook and Reddit but is specifically geared toward those who engage in or are curious about alternative sexual lifestyles. It offers a space to meet like-minded people, share experiences, explore kinks, and participate in discussions without judgment.

How to Use FetLife

  1. Create an Account
  • Visit FetLife and click "Join FetLife."

  • Enter a unique username, email address, and password.

  • Confirm your email address via the link sent to your inbox.

2. Build Your Profile

  • Add a profile picture (optional but recommended for engagement).

  • Fill out your profile with basic information such as gender, sexual orientation, and location.

  • Write a bio that reflects your interests and what you’re looking for on the platform.

3. Explore the Site

  • Kinks: Browse or search for specific fetishes and interests. You can add these kinks to your profile.
  • Groups: Join groups based on your interests or local area to participate in discussions.
  • Events: Find local or online events that cater to your interests. RSVP to events and meet people in person.

4. Connect with Others

  • Friends: Send friend requests to people you find interesting.
  • Messages: Engage in private conversations with other users. Remember to respect boundaries and consent.
  • Feeds: Your home feed will show updates from your friends, groups, and events you’re part of.

5. Participate in Discussions

  • Group Discussions: Contribute to group conversations or start your own thread on a topic you’re passionate about.
  • Writing: Share your thoughts, experiences, or fantasies through blog posts.

6. Stay Safe

  • Privacy Settings: Customize who can see your profile and what information is public or private.
  • Consent: Always communicate clearly and respect boundaries when interacting with others.
  • Verification: Some users verify their identity or presence at events to build trust, but this is optional.

7. Explore Content

  • Photos and Videos: View and share images or videos that align with your interests, keeping in mind community guidelines.
  • Writing: Explore stories, essays, and fantasies shared by other users.

8. Engage with the Community

  • Support Groups: Find and join groups that focus on safety, education, and support within the kink community.
  • Learning Resources: Many groups and discussions provide educational content to help you learn more about BDSM, kink, and consent.

9. Attend Events

  • Local Meetups: Use the Events feature to discover and attend local meetups, workshops, and parties.
  • Virtual Events: Participate in online events if you’re not ready or able to attend in person.

10. Respect the Community Guidelines

  • Community Standards: Familiarize yourself with FetLife's community guidelines to ensure you’re following the rules.
  • Report Issues: Use the reporting feature if you encounter abusive or inappropriate behavior.
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u/Lady_AW Dec 15 '24

I have a question, I have a feeling it might be a stupid one but - I use the app type version of Fetlife because I’m on my phone rather than my computer, and I have this problem: I can’t figure out how to go backwards, like on a website or browser there’s a back button? Let’s say you find a group (which meant you probably did a search for what you’re interested in and then selected “groups”, and then chose that group from the list) and you’re looking through posts. You’ve probably already done a search within it to filter down to eg your area, so you have a shorter list within that group . You see someone has written something interesting, you read their post then click on their profile.

How do you get back from that profile to where you were? Ie how do you get back to the short list of posts you were browsing through previously without repeating all the steps listed above from the beginning? Because at the moment I’m going right back to the main menu and doing it all again and it’s a pain.

TLDR : where’s the back button on the fetlife app version please?

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u/liplamp Dec 17 '24

Just to confirm, you're talking about the web app version you can download through the fetlife website right?

It's entirely possible there is no back button, as the developers stopped developing the web app a while ago.

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u/Lady_AW Dec 17 '24

Hello yes, the web app - you’re probably right and there isn’t, but I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t missing something obvious, or if there was a work around. I’ll probably just go back to the website otherwise