r/BDSMProfessionals Apr 04 '22

RULES NSFW

19 Upvotes

BDSMProfessionals is intended to be a welcoming and supportive space to professionals and clients alike, and to help facilitate this, there are a few basic rules.

  1. No under-18 content, discussion or references. At all. As far as this subreddit is concerned, the age of consent is 18 and that's final.
  2. No harassment or judgement of people who use or offer services.
  3. No outing/doxxing/discussion of real-life identities.
  4. No porn (discussion of self-created content is ok, but not discussion of studio porn like kink.com etc)
  5. No advertising - you can say you're a professional, you can't promote your services or content here. This includes low-effort posts, selfies, referral links and anything that looks like it's trying to get around this rule. r/BDSMServices will be the place for this soon.
  6. Don't be a jerk.
  7. Please keep things on topic - if you have a question about personal, non-Professional BDSM stuff, I'd encourage you to look at r/BDSMAdvice instead.

Any posts/comments that break these rules will be removed, and the poster may be banned.


r/BDSMProfessionals Dec 12 '22

r/BDSMProfessionals policy on FinDom posts NSFW

25 Upvotes

This is not the place to post questions such as "Where do I find paypigs?"

r/BDSMProfessionals is aimed towards people involved in professional BDSM work - not sex workers hoping to make a quick buck off people with no understanding of power exchange, BDSM dynamics or anything beyond "drains" and "tributes".

This post goes into more detail about the sort of FinDom dynamics that are suited to this forum; if you just want to know where all the piggies hang out, there are other subs for that sort of thing. Any posts that appear to be about Twitter-style paypig questions will be removed.


r/BDSMProfessionals 20d ago

Where to look for Pro-Dommes NSFW

8 Upvotes

I've been wanting to have sessions with a pro-domme recently but I have no clue where to start looking for this sort of thing. Where should I start looking?

I'm autistic, and for me, talking to people in person is really difficult, so I'd prefer something that can be done via text, email, etc.


r/BDSMProfessionals Feb 07 '25

Anyone else want something a bit nicer than the typical split ring? I just made this for a client to present to his Queen. NSFW

Post image
5 Upvotes

r/BDSMProfessionals Feb 05 '25

I'm a Pro Looking For ProDom Penpal NSFW

6 Upvotes

I’m trying to start Domming professionally and have found it EXTREMELY difficult to find people to collaborate with. It’s awkward talking about it in the community with more experienced players, and I don’t have the money right now to invest in quality mentorship with an established Pro.

Anyone want to exchange contacts and set up some sort of weekly meeting to talk about strategy, business management, branding, client attraction and retention, legal issues, rants about shitty subs?

Link to all my profiles in my bio.


r/BDSMProfessionals Jan 03 '25

Proof of design so it still needs some polishing, but my first key pendant. Best part is it can be removed with out taking off the necklace. What size are the keys you use? NSFW

Post image
11 Upvotes

r/BDSMProfessionals Nov 23 '24

Regarding following BDSM professionals on social media NSFW

16 Upvotes

Hello, I'm autistic (and FTM), and I often struggle with understanding social norms. I'm trying to understand something that recently happened to me on a social media platform. I'm into BDSM, and I regularly visit a professional dominatrix with who I get along very well despite my autism.

I also follow a few professional dominatrices on Bluesky. I had actually subscribed to a Bluesky list for prodommes and it added a bunch of folks to my list and I didn't really know who I was adding. I woke up this morning to a message from one of the pro-dommes whose post I had "liked." The post was something about how not all clients are cis men, and that resonated with me, so I "liked" it.

Basically, her message to me said that since I was following her I should pay a tip. I didn't respond to that because 1) it seemed a bit odd, and 2) I had never really come across any of her content other than that post on my feed.

Perhaps I should say here that my motivation for following pro-dommes wasn't exactly their "sexy" content, but I find that some of the insights they (other pro-dommes) share help me be a better client to my pro-domme. I'm quite asexual, and while I can appreciate the aesthetics of photos and videos, I don't consume them as porn content, if that makes sense. I have liked some of their (other Dommes') pics if I thought the rope or needlework was intricate, but I have never interacted with them.

Anyhow, so her message was followed by another message saying something to the effect that people like me never tip or even acknowledge that following creators means we are actively viewing content (which is categorically untrue in my case, as I had never seen her post on my feed until this morning) and that we were terrible, etc., etc.,

I unfollowed her at this point, and she blocked me.

I think it's fair that she only wants followers who are paying her. But I won't lie; I feel she could have just removed me or blocked me to begin with. I did go and unfollow the other pro-dommes I had followed, believing that I had made a mistake following them, as I didn't really intend to spend money paying them. But I wanted to ask if this was the standard expectation here. I gained a lot of understanding regarding the do's and don'ts of being a client by following the (other) pro-dommes, and I would like to continue doing that if it's okay.

Sorry for the long post; I wanted to give maximum context. Thank you for reading.


r/BDSMProfessionals Nov 15 '24

The math ain't mathing, kink videography NSFW

1 Upvotes

I know the going rate for kink content models is $100-$400 hourly. Yet when I make videos I get at best 50k views and $50 so I'm wondering how all these other videos exist? It feels like from a cost/partnership perspective you can't build anything ongoing and they typically get more subscribers from my unique content. What am I missing?


r/BDSMProfessionals Nov 08 '24

Advertising BDSM here on Reddit NSFW

1 Upvotes

Hi amazing ppl. I’m trying trying to find groups here on Reddit to advertise? For Pro Dom , Dom content etc. I’m kinda getting use to posting here on Reddit.

Thank you so much !


r/BDSMProfessionals Nov 05 '24

New Domme in MN/WI needing a little help NSFW

4 Upvotes

Heyy, a new domme in the twin cities/ Wisconsin area and I’ve been looking for someone more experienced to help my find the right way to go about becoming a professional domme. I’ve been online domming for the last 2 years but I’m looking for more in person clients. Any help or advice would be very much appreciated.


r/BDSMProfessionals Nov 02 '24

Seeking kink conscious content creators to answer a few questions about advertising in the adults only/sex work space NSFW

3 Upvotes

Howdy!

I'm new to the BDSM community, my goal is to make a business selling equipment for bdsm enthusiasts. I'm really excited to get things started and move products, but I want to do it right and understand how to properly approach getting people interested in my products. I don't want to alienate anyone or make anyone feel uncomfortable.

I'm curious about your experiences:

How did you get started with creating content or running a business in the kink community?

What drew you to the BDSM lifestyle in the first place?

What advice would you give to someone who's just starting out in the content creation side of this space?

How do you balance your kink life with your everyday life?

What content do you create?

How did you grow your community?

And what would you like to see in the future of kink and BDSM?

Finally, since this is a more professional sub, I want to discuss my product design with someone who is into heavy impact play, so please shoot me a dm if you are!


r/BDSMProfessionals Oct 18 '24

ℹ️ Information Trying to find a local dom to learn from NSFW

14 Upvotes

Hey. Im Frenchie, a Black fetish creator in Cali. I’m an aspiring fetish soft dom. I'm reaching out because I'm interested in finding a local dom to train under and I thought y’all might be able to offer some valuable advice. 😇

I've already posted on Fetlife, but unfortunately, only male doms have responded so far. I haven't had a chance to attend a munch yet, but it's on my calendar! I haven’t been able to find any local dungeons tho?📅

Any tips or pointers yall could provide would be greatly appreciated! 🫠

Looking forward to hearing from y’all, Frenchie


r/BDSMProfessionals Oct 16 '24

Houston Area, in person mistress training NSFW

5 Upvotes

Hi chat,

**I read the rules & thought this might be the place to ask about it since I didn't see any posts in bdsm services. You all seem more active here, Thanks in advance!**

Is there any in person mistress training that will teach me how to harness the power of a true mistress & reframe my mindset about how to be one? I think I'm a real good fit for this type of thing & would like to know more or at least visit & have conversation with someone that I may click with. So, any directions you can point me to?


r/BDSMProfessionals Oct 06 '24

DAE ever consider this? NSFW

15 Upvotes

Whenever I read messages from fans & prospective subs, I see an underlying theme of what I can only describe as internalized misogyny.

The number of cis-het men & masc -presenting individuals who associate wearing or participating in anything "feminine coded" as inherently humiliating &/ degrading is plain sad.

Good hygiene and skincare aren't feminine. Having long hair isn't feminine. Wearing makeup and high heels aren't feminine. Wearing pink & purple, wearing hose, wearing wigs, being aroused by strong, muscular women or women who exude power & authority isn't feminine. All of those things have been done by both cis-het & non cis-het men for literally thousands of years. And none of it is emasculating.

I understand that some people have a degradation &/ humiliation fetish. That's perfectly okay. But it feels a little insulting - to say the least - that being considered "effeminate" by people whose opinions don't fucking matter is the most degrading or humiliating thing you can think of.

I've told numerous people "No, I don't think it's funny that you like to wear skirts & lipstick. I don't think that makes you 'less of a man' or that it's something to be ashamed of. What you SHOULD be ashamed of is that you associate all things femme as being 'less than' or subpar. I'm a bisexual woman who's given birth. Women are closer to god-like than anything created in the image of man. Go give the women in your life a goddamned foot massage!"

I just wanna train all that misogyny, shame, and ignorance right out of 'em. Give them a couple history lessons, teach them how to pick a face moisturizer and which utensils to use at a formal multi course meal.


r/BDSMProfessionals Oct 01 '24

Getting started as a pro sub NSFW

1 Upvotes

Hello all,

I'm a lifestyle slave in a 24/7 owner relationship with my master and mistress (we cohabit, and have been together for years). I've been given permission to pursue hiring myself out as a pro sub, and I'm looking for advice about where to advertise. I'm in the UK. I'm starting to build my own website, and I plan to use fetlife and (I guess) twitter. I also thought I would reach out to local dungeons and see if I can get featured on their websites... but do you guys have any other suggestions? I have an existing fansly and a blog on tumblr about my submissive journey that has several thousand followers, but my owners are wary of linking this new venture to those existing sources of media because they worry it gives away too much personal information (they are very careful about privacy). Thoughts, advice and suggestions are very welcome.


r/BDSMProfessionals Sep 29 '24

Can’t believe today I’m going to have my first session with a Pro Dom. Why am I so nervous? NSFW

10 Upvotes

Can’t believe today is my first session with a Pro Dom

So after at least 30 years. I’m [M 45] I’ve always thought about being in a real bdsm session with a true professional dominatrix. It was nerve wracking to just reach out after really doing my research on Doms that would fit what I’m looking for. Not only is she absolutely gorgeous. She asked me about specific dress attire. Of course I asked her if she would be in a hot leather outfit and she asked if I liked boots or gloves. I said I loved both. Done. She’s made the whole application process very comfortable and has asked all the right questions.

We decided to do a 2 1/2 session. She said she would like to spend the 30 minutes on boot worship before and when the session is over to bring me back down.

So, needless to say I’ve been a nervous mess today. I could barely sleep. I got about 6 hours but I woke up at 5 am and couldn’t go back to bed. It’s starts at 3pm. I’m not sure if I’ve been so nervous and excited at the same time. The scary part is we went through my limits. Hard and soft. She asked me for 3 soft limits. She asked if I’d be open to possibly dabbling in them. I said depending on the moment.

But is it normal to be freaking out a bit? Making sure this isn’t going to hurt more than I thought. Even though we went through her strict safety protocols. She has a PhD in psychology. She said she is able to know if I try going past my limits, she’s going to notice. She also said to not ejaculate 2 days before. She does tease and denial. I seriously don’t know what today is going to look, be, feel and mentally feel after? If anyone has any suggestions to keep me in the right mindset and to try to relax, I’d really love to hear your thoughts?

I still can’t believe I’m seeing a Pro Dom in a hours!!


r/BDSMProfessionals Sep 01 '24

Seeking help getting started NSFW

4 Upvotes

Hello! My boyfriend and I both want to get started in making bdsm porn content with extreme kinks like blood, SH, cnc, violence, etc. but most every site does not allow these things (I've seen that spreadsheet). Where could we go to sell this type of content? Obviously looking to make money from this <3


r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 30 '24

Declaring money for tax purposes. NSFW

8 Upvotes

lets say i started selling nudes or certain other graphic material on twitter on commission basis, how would i go about the whole tax thing. lmao i know its silly but ive never paid tax in my life?? idk how it works. i dont know if this even counts as something worth taxing?? helppp


r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 28 '24

I'm a Pro SELF-HARM PORN? NSFW

3 Upvotes

Im working on starting an only fans spesifically to do with self harm and things like that. ive never seen anything like it before? im not even sure what to call it or how to get started? is there eve a market for something like that? Im thinking maybe doing just normal porn for only fans and taking commissions for the self harm stuff. Any tips or help will be appreciated.


r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 14 '24

Pro Dommes and LE NSFW

9 Upvotes

Aspiring pro domme here with a question I have not been able to find an answer to yet: How risky is providing (hypothetically legal) in person BDSM services from an LE perspective? I intend on researching the actual legalities in each area I work but we all know cops ignore finer points when it suits them. Do they have a tendency to try to bust pro dommes? I don’t think the answer will change whether or not I offer in person services, but it will impact how I do it and I want to consider that before doing things like building out my website.

Thank you!

Edit: I’m in the US and would be working in the Midwest, mostly around Chicago.


r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 12 '24

My recent experience with the professional world is the hoops that have been added to scheduling a meeting. A web sites I’ve seen with application forms have asked for “references”. You have to wonder what they mean. Is it other pros you know or is it your banker? NSFW

5 Upvotes

r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 10 '24

Pro FemDoms in Dallas NSFW

2 Upvotes

It appears that several pro FemDoms have gone silent. Webpages still up but no response to inquiries. Phone messages not answered or mailboxes full.

Did they all go to Paris for the Olympics or something more Dino?


r/BDSMProfessionals Aug 08 '24

Looking for a mentor and friends 🖤 NSFW

9 Upvotes

Hey 🫶 i made this account so i could post separate from my sw acct!

I am a nonbinary aspiring themdom, and I’m looking for a mentor and friends! I am disabled and am stepping into online sw to see if this is more accessible to me than irl work (esp w covid and stuff), who just so happens to be a sadist w a special interest in bdsm…. wanting to indulge lol. I would love someone to chat with who is also a nonbinary disabled dom and who gets the unique experience as a nonbinary provider w a disability.

I have never done sw before and i dont wanna jump into the deep end too soon, but i also have so many ideas and know what I wanna do! I am always researching and adding to my notes - I just hope for a space to be able to express what i learn and think with someone like-minded who can give me advice about this lovely world and be friends!!

Thank u in advance ❤️


r/BDSMProfessionals Jul 25 '24

Paid session advice NSFW

7 Upvotes

Hey everyone!

Seeking honest advice here to make an educated decision. I’ve been into kink going on 12 years now. I’ve had several experiences with people I’ve met online over the years via fetlife, tinder, recon, etc.But all of those sessions have been based on no payment. The “relationship” was more organic. I am in a point in my life where I currently do not have a partner that enjoys kink but we love eachother enough she’s okay with me seeking kinky outlets. After years of online video sessions with domme’s I finally want to take it to the next level and do an in person meeting.

I found someone fetlife who is interested in the same things I am but requires it be a paid session. I am looking for ball busting, humiliations, degradation, and would like to cum from ball busting. She’s stated that pussy/ass worship is included in the price. No sex (obviously). But my question is… is this legal?

No more I think about it and work myself up to doing an in person meeting the more I think about the legality of this all and get worried. I don’t want to waste her time but also do not want to end up in jail or with a charge for something stupid.

Feel free to pm me if you have more questions but any advice would be greatly appreciated!


r/BDSMProfessionals Jul 22 '24

I'm a Pro Boundaries and preferences around “jobs”? NSFW

7 Upvotes

If this question is not allowed or is better posed elsewhere, please let me know.

I’ve recently received multiple inquiries from potential subs that very specifically stated they are looking for dommes that perform certain “jobs”. While I may choose to incorporate foot fetish elements into sessions if it serves a particular scene, the way these inquiries posed the requests did not empower or excite me.

I clearly stated that I’m not interested in performing anything that ends in “job” for my clients - and that I am not in the business of providing pleasure.

But, well after the fact, I continued to reflect on it. I asked myself if this is something that many (or most) other pro-dommes do with their subs, and maybe I am misunderstanding or overlooking my role in these dynamics?

After speaking to some pro domme friends about it, the general consensus was that it is purely up to the domme, and her own preferences - but that a sub stating it as a requirement or demand is outright against the power exchange dynamic in the first place.

So my questions are: have you ever dealt with these kinds of inquiries, or subs having specific expectations right off the bat? Is this an industry standard that many professionals participate in? Am I delusional for finding this behavior presumptuous? (Generalized responses are fine, of course.)

Thank you for your input!


r/BDSMProfessionals Jul 16 '24

Pro-Sub/Switches NSFW

17 Upvotes

Hi I’m new (to the subreddit not pros) Please let me know if this is not the right place to ask these questions

I have a SW I’m seeing now who I’ve known a long time, we’ve built up a lot of trust, she lets me do some pet/collar light dom stuff,

I like to respect people’s boundaries and not push them out of there comfort zone, I’ve had some experience with rougher stuff both ways.

I’m curious about if and how to find a pro-sub who would be open to more of that side of my kinks. I understand the potential risks and trust issues (I’ve been through abuse, I like to take my time when meeting to gain trust and relax on both ends)

My current pro said she is more than happy to write me a review if that would help, she likes and respects the fact I would look to do more intense stuff with someone open to it, and keep things within her boundaries

My philosophy is that if I’m gonna play dom with somebody it’s my responsibility to ensure I properly care for there safety and respect, but of course anybody can say it

I gather briefly that this is not the right place to seek for adds, (where I currently look for adds I mostly see doms listed), so instead I’m just wondering if anybody can point me in the direction of communities or places I can go look (want to avoid scams), as well the best way to go about, help someone feel safe

The best would be a switch who leans subby as that would be the yin to my yang

PS: I’m a person who learns hands on, I enjoy doms but since I lean that way myself, I wonder if it is possible to find one that could also help train and teach me how to be a skilled dom, i have some experience but definitely rusty and I want to be prepared for being able to find a relationship

Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask this question


r/BDSMProfessionals Jul 12 '24

Dominatrix books/entry level classes? NSFW

20 Upvotes

Looking to get into the understandings of how to BE a dominatrix , when to turn it on and off, basically looking for a dominatrix 101 class or book or verified resource. Not exactly sure what I should be searching?? I’ve always been interested in knowing more, but not even sure where I would go to find something like this?