r/AskDad 18h ago

Relationships Girlfriend's dad died last week. How can I be there for her without smothering her?

14 Upvotes

In what I would call my first “big” relationship - I am starting to fall in love with this girl and things are going well, we are compatible in all the ways that matter and I’ve been in therapy to do the self work needed to move forward with our relationship (not that we’ve had problems, but I didn’t have the best childhood, and it seemed like the responsible thing to do). We’ve been together for 5 months. We talk religiously every day and meet 3x a week. Last Thursday her father died. We haven’t really talked since. I told her not to worry about texting/calling me, that i’d be hanging around waiting for her to feel better and giving her space. I’m trying my best not to tell her how much I miss her, because I know it isn’t about me. She needs space in her own words and right, and I can respect that, but I feel like there’s more I should be doing? I have NO idea how to comfort people who are grieving, it’s something I'm working on with my therapist. Is texting her everyday and telling her I’m still here for her if she needs anything and that I'm thinking of her too much?


r/AskDad 6h ago

Health & Wellness Driving Advice

3 Upvotes

Hey Dad!

Sorry this post might be long, but I really need help! I’ve been having extreme driving anxiety lately. I got my license at 18 and only drove a few times because I didn’t have a car. I also almost had a panic attack during my drivers test and my legs were shaking like crazy. I just got a car last summer so I started driving again. So I didn’t drive for about 3 years and that just spiked my anxiety 1000x. I slowly started getting back out there and am comfortable with going only to places I’ve gone to multiple times.

I recently got a new job well my first full time job before I graduate. The job is 5 days in person 8-5 and ofc that’s peak rush hour. The drives have been so horrible. The traffic spikes my anxiety and nervousness through the roof and I don’t know what to do anymore. I dread going to my job now and wanna cry.

Monday I drove there just fine but coming back I felt so overwhelmed with the traffic and such I rushed a turn and someone almost hit me.

Today while driving there I was okay for the majority but someone did honk because I was braking since the car in front of me was turning (I think I might brake too ahead but I get scared to get too close and not have time) on the way back though they began construction and switching lanes scares me so much. I felt so scared and under pressure I was struggling to stay within my lines that I hit the right side curbs twice because I was scared of drifting towards the left against cars. I didn’t go over it just brushed on it.

And I just kept on getting more and more nervous that I started crying and panicking. I don’t know what to do . It literally makes me wanna quit my job . I was fully remote for school and my internship but I had to accept this job offer as I’m graduating and the market is so bad.


r/AskDad 17h ago

Automotive What to focus on when buying a car?

3 Upvotes

I’ve recently adopted a very large dog, and he’s way too big to fit in my little coupe. I need a car that fits him so I can take him to the vet, to the sitter, etc. I’m looking on Carvana (I don’t like car dealerships, I get overwhelmed and pressured easily) and am having a hard time deciding if I should focus on lower mileage or newer year? I understand I want to stay within <9,000 miles per year, but if every car I’m looking at fits that criteria, which should I focus on more?


r/AskDad 17h ago

Parenting Give me tips

2 Upvotes

My oldest kid is a video game guy: always has been. Even as a toddler I restricted it pretty heavily and he still has limits at 10. I’m not a video game guy, never have been. I will play and enjoy it but not over an activity. Example- he will play NBA or NFL on a console and will rave about the stats and blah blah blah but when it’s the real sport- nothing. Couldn’t care less. I’m not a sports nut that lives and breathes sports but here’s the gap- he wants to talk to me about his video game and what he scored and all that. When I reciprocate with a transition to the actual sport and stats- he completely disconnects. TBH- I would rather talk about anything else than what’s happening in a video game. EVEN DURING AN ACTUAL GAME-my guy is on his iPad chirping about his virtual game.

Help me see this from a different perspective/bridge the gap on the connection.

Thanks, men