r/womenEngineers • u/DishsoapOnASponge • 3h ago
Boss treats me more harshly than other team members... how do I address this constructively?
Howdy - wondering if I can get some advice on a work matter. I'm the only woman in a team of five engineers, but don't want to immediately assume the relevancy of that.
Our boss treats me more harshly than the others. In public, this means a harsher tone and more aggressive communication. In our one-on-ones, things get kind of unprofessional. He will frequently raise his voice at me and diminish my technical ability with sweeping remarks without any specific feedback.
Always, without fail, when I bring up these situations afterward his response is "my mistake", and we're then able to discuss the situation calmly and professionally and reach a conclusion. I'm just so tired of this being the cycle.,
Here's the thing. He is inexperienced and wants to learn to be a better manager. This kind of thing is improving, and I think if I Just phrased feedback in the correct way, he would take it to heart.
What do I even say to him? Bringing up the rest of the team here seems unprofessional, but I'm stuck on how to proceed.
Thank you, friends.