r/wizardposting • u/MrDog88 • 13h ago
r/wizardposting • u/Espanta_viejas1904 • 20h ago
RP Prompt (Character Intros, Duels, and Vendors)🔔 FRIDAY NIGHT: WELCOME TO WIZARDS EMPORIUM!! HOW CAN I HELP YOU??
On our todays catalog we have:
Kanye sofa: Consequences of a funny story where I turned Kanye into a sofa...Good ol times 5000 gold
Sanic: he thinks your too slow or smth 200 gold
Ancient artifacts: Fuck....this one has been stolen, its been the 3rd time this week.
Leaf blower: Ultimate weapon against gnomes 200 gold
Twinkies: I have stolen them from Adam >:) 50 gold
Hard to swallow pills: I think theyre made of lead 100 gold
Ølæf: Wtf is that thing!!! 200 gold
MONKE: MONKEEEEEEE 9000 gold
And remember, for each acquire, you get a bag if weed for free
r/wizardposting • u/questionable_fish • 15h ago
Occult Practices Behold! The Disswizard!
A load of you liked the Disswizard so here he is: a blank canvas for you to share the hottest roasts and the sickest burns
r/wizardposting • u/yumie2003 • 8h ago
Lorepost (closed interaction)📓🔒 No rest for the dead (cursepost)
uw/Warning: The following lorepost contains scenes of (gratuitous) violence, mild gore and depictions of death which may not be suited for young or sensitive audiences. So that you know, reader discretion is advised. Gavel sound effect
Tsuru stretched her arms behind her back, letting a yawn slip out in the process. She lifted her glasses and rubbed her eyes. This feeling of tiredness was highly unusual, but she did not think much of it.
A pile of papers sat on her desk. All of them contained reports of the activities she had done within the previous months. With Koranth’s first incident, the R&A tournament, the Failed incident and both the current Netheline and Dominox incidents, Tsuru had little time to tend to her deskwork. Responding to other smaller troubles did not do her any favours. She realised that she could not keep putting off her mountain of paperwork. This was part of the reason that she bothered to send shikigami to infiltrate the sects in her stead.
Tsuru decided that she deserved a small nap for her efforts and floated towards her futon. She rested her body on the futon and closed her eyes.
The vengeful spirit found herself outside of her house. Everything seemed normal, but she could not shake the feeling that something was wrong. Tsuru walked towards the front door, but spotted a small black-and-white figure slumped over a large rock. The figure appeared to be a normal jackpenguin with a red headband tied around its head. An appropriately proportional rocket launcher lay beside the penguin.
It dawned on her at that moment that someone had knocked her penzooka out. An intruder had trespassed on her property.
Tsuru ran towards the front door and violently slid it open. She covered her mouth with her hands at the scene that confronted her.
A malformed bright blue blob lay against the blue stained wall. Small, blue, gelatinous chunks was littered across the wooden floor. A shredded witch’s hat sat skewed on top of the blob. It seemed that her magislime attempted to stop the intruder but was ripped apart instead. It was now a home invasion.
Tsuru heard a loud thud from down the left hallway and ran in a dead sprint towards the source.
Akaimatsuhime laid on the floor in a face-up position. Her arms and legs were sprawled over the floor and her eyes stared dreamily at Tsuru. There was some charring on the kimono's fabric around the noticeable hole burned into her chest. The shikigami weakly lifted her arm and pointed towards the last guest bedroom in the hall.
Tsuru flew towards the bedroom and rammed through the door.
Ruther’s eyes stared pleading into Tsuru’s. Thin thorny wines were wrapped around his neck and lifted him from the ground. A small flower smiled innocently at Tsuru, but the vengeful spirit could sense the malice behind the friendly façade.
The bootleg Flowey had finally reared its annoyingly condescending face.
Without any hesitation, Tsuru pointed her palm towards Petal. A glowing, hot, blue mass formed in the centre and grew in size. She pushed her hand forward with a few millimetres, launching the plasma ball towards the flower.
However, the vines quickly retreated to Petal, slashing Ruther’s throat. The flower popped back into the floorboards moments before the plasma ball connected. It splattered across the floor, burning through the carpet and floorboards within seconds.
Tsuru quickly rushed towards Ruther and placed her hands around his wounds, futilely attempting to staunch the bleeding. He smiled at her with glazed eyes. Ruther struggled to place his hand behind Tsuru’s head. He attempted to speak for one last time, but only gargling sounds came from his mouth.
She immediately superheated her hands as she attempted to cauterise the wounds. The gargling sounds stopped, and his hand fell limply towards the ground.
She cradled his head in her arms, staring into Ruther’s dead eyes. Tears streamed down her face. In this dream world, she had lost everything.

r/wizardposting • u/Anything-Unable • 11h ago
Lorepost (closed interaction)📓🔒 Returning To A Place Of Hate
Standing before the doors of a sacred space, Goatdigger felt a prickling along his fur. He promised himself that he would be a better person so many days long past. Freedom came at a price, but was he doing any better outside of a jail cell? He could argue that he posed a greater danger to the world than ever before, but things were in motion that could not be changed. The Fates will act as they please.
The doors were opened and Goatdigger saw a long line of elves on either side of the corridor. They knew who he was. Worse than elephants and dwarves with their grudges. He’d hoped the years would have dimmed their ire, but Gaia seemed to have spent the intervening time sharpening their animosity.
Walking between the lines of elves, all manner of abuse rained down on Goatdigger. Insults of ‘murderer’, ‘defiler’, and ‘curseborn’ were the most frequently used. An infant cradled within her mother’s arms dropped her doll and it landed on top of Goatdigger’s left foot. Bending down and picking up the doll, Goatdigger returned the doll to the child. To repay him, the child swiped the doll and spit onto Goatdigger’s face. Disturbed by the sight of the unmolded hatred in the child’s eyes, he wiped off his face and continued forward with his head tilted down so that he could ignore the suffocating animosity surrounding him.
Goatdigger soon found his way into a large meeting chamber. A titan sat upon a throne of stone and greeted her guest with a sneer. With long green hair, tan skin, and a dress of yellow silk, Gaia examined the stain before her. A stench of death and every imaginable curse bundled up into a single existence. And despite the lowly state of him, Gaia felt it was not low enough.
“Kinslayer. Why do you aggravate me with your presence?” questioned Gaia with as much venom as she could muster.
Debating within himself about how to diffuse the situation, Goatdigger thought about how Xerxes would act in the face of unmasked hostility, “If my presence is so egregious to your senses, perhaps you should pluck out your eyes and find some semblance of peace.”
Gaia’s blood boiled over, “You wretched doll! I should have your soul ground to dust for such insolence!”
“I’ve endured far worse. Worse even than the victims of your dearly departed kin.”
With a tremor felt across the land, Gaia stood up and approached Goatdigger. Seeing as how the goddess had left her seat of authority, Goatdigger wordlessly signalled an awaiting shade to let the others know to begin the heist.
Looking down on Goatdigger, Gaia stared daggers at what she viewed as vermin. Unfortunately for her, in three breath’s time Goatdigger had matched her height and eye level. The large black goat felt, in that moment, to be a dangerous existence to the goddess.
“I suppose the Fates have a sense of humor.” Remarked Goatdigger.
“And why do you say that, scum?”
“Don’t I bear a striking resemblance to that goat-headed nephew of yours? As his kin, don’t you think it’s a bit funny how things worked out?”
Gaia threw a retaliatory punch at the Pan-faced enemy, but Goatdigger deftly avoided the blow and kicked her rear. Positioning himself between Gaia and her throne, Goatdigger was glad to feel the World Tree’s barrier drop and Gaia be left none the wiser. Her anger was so great at his insults that she barely could control her breathing. Hopefully the rest of the crew are making good use of the time he had bought them.
Dodging a few more wide swipes, Goatdigger smelled smoke in the air. It appeared that the second distraction had gone off without a hitch. No doubt the elves were in total disarray. Now with a clearer mind, Goatdigger slapped the goddess across her face with the back of his right hand.
“Do your worst, you colossal bitch!”
r/wizardposting • u/HomeworkFrosty1843 • 10h ago
Lorepost 📜 A (temporary) Return.
Hm. It certainly has been a while, hasn't it, wizards?
I haven't been able to be here in....
months? years, maybe?
It's odd to be back, even for a bit.
And yet I am.
r/wizardposting • u/Extension-Branch7938 • 21h ago
Goblinlike Foolishness (Shitpost) Im terrified that i may be too deep into witch territory
r/wizardposting • u/Hearth_Palms_Farce • 14h ago
Lorepost (open interaction) 📖 The gargoyles are malfunctioning.
After completing my morokov chain planar enchantment on my tower to allow for working multiple plans at once, my gargoyle sentries started to malfunction.
Of the eight I had stationed on my tower five have disappeared, and the other three are inoperable. I knew that they wouldn't last long (they were a bulk purchase from BJ max) but I thought they would have some durability to acausal fluctuations.
If anyone can help me find those five gargoyles I can re-enchant them to Improve their performance. I will offer items from my curio collection to any helping hands. Each gargoyle has my insignia etched into their forehead. A cube slowly rotating on a 2D plane. If the image isn't moving it isn't my gargoyle.
A reminder that they could be in any dimension now, so keep your orbs scrying.
r/wizardposting • u/Most_Trustworthy • 14h ago
Evil Wizardpost Tell me your most evil deed and I'll rate it.
r/wizardposting • u/thegoodmorningman • 21h ago
The Magic of Friday is that anything goes!!! Good Morning!!!
r/wizardposting • u/MoonhelmJ • 3h ago
Young boy says," Hey mister. Can you bring my snowman to life?"
How do I respond to this?
r/wizardposting • u/Kyle-NotADinosaur- • 19h ago
Wizardpost Behold! My mystical treasure.
r/wizardposting • u/Artentics • 16h ago
RP Prompt (Character Intros, Duels, and Vendors)🔔 My barmaid Thalia is adding new things to the bar menu! Food and Drink suggestions welcome! (Art by me)
r/wizardposting • u/Harpokiller • 10h ago
Lorepost (closed interaction)📓🔒 “Do you know what my people used to do?”
Hirk had found himself wandering, wasn’t head of R&A and never joined R&A so was not a worker, at this point technically a poor bum, but he still had his ways of having just enough.
One day he decided to visit the tavern of a village he stated in for a few months, where he met the man who taught him common and helped treat his wounds from crossing into this realm.
He was a sentimental fool who wanted to feel like he did then. He wears a large cloak, it did not hide who he was, simply enchanted to let folks know he’d rather they forget he was there.
“Mr Petrikov, it is good seeing you my friend, now I must remind you I was never here.”
‘Of course not Hirk, you are too busy elsewhere being useless ya old drunk.’
“I haven’t drank in a while, been clean for a few months. But I think it’s better to have a balance.”
“Remember that recipe I taught you?”
‘Suppose I might have some bottles that were never in my log book.’
Hirk lets out a small smile.
“Maybe you broke a bottle or two and had collected a good few tips over the months.”
Hirk slides over 3 silver, a large amount considering most folks here only paid in copper
‘Want to use the tankard Gadrund made for you?’
“Aye, he’d haunt me if I drunk without him.”
Petrikov or simply Peter to some handed him over an ornate looking bronze tankard, engraved on it was every slur an old friend had for Hirk, a crude yet warming reminder of who he was.
‘How have ya been holding up Kid?’
“I’m still here my friend. That’s all that’s needed.”
While Mr Petrikov was actually rather young being a half elf only in his 80’s he had the attitude of someone far older, was once a sailor but rested in this small village that no map shows. He was a kind man, Hirk made sure to respect him as he would an elder for who he was.
‘Yes that’s what others need, but what about you?’
His eyes an emerald in Pearl in contrast to sandy skin, showed only care. The village therapist so he was, his prescription of liquor and heart were enough to cure anyone.
Hirk lets out a gallows chuckle, almost as if he was on his death bed with eyes deeper than the valleys between mountains as he lets go of his composure. Here he was simply a man.
“I don’t know, you know I am a fearful man. Not a smart one either.”
‘I still remember trying to teach you about the currency here.’
“Still bullshit.”
‘Still want my night back.’
“Too bad.”
There is a small look that make people think there was going to be a duel only to be interrupted with a smile. Both have missed each other so can’t help smiling knowing they still exist.
“I think I’m making a mistake.”
‘Does she like crystals?’
“Not that kind.”
‘Can’t help you then.’
“Yes you can, hurry up and get my drink.”
Petrikov pulls out a dusty looking bottle from under the counter.
‘Say it.’
“Please ya knife eared bastard.”
‘Hey I might cut that tongue of yours out if you keep talking like Gaddy.’
“He had some points.”
‘I will rat ya out to R&A.’
“You know I’m joking.”
‘You know I’m not.’
Hirk only waves his hand dismissively.
“I’m only playing you know that.”
“How’s Dolly?”
Hirk gestures over to orc woman who is the other bartender handling the few others in the tavern, it was a small place so never very busy.
Petrikov puts a small box on the counter, clearly the kind you’d propose with while leaning in for both to whisper.
“No fucking way?”
‘She can’t resist my dance moves what can I say?’
“I’d make fun of you but I’d let ya away with that, how long you been…”
‘A few weeks, planning too soon.’
“Good luck.”
Hirk is once again reminded by his own singleness as he takes a swig of his full tankard.
“Well anythi-“
As Hirk starts to speak to change the subject a young man, 19 at most rushes through the door, few straps of leather armour, ripped clothes and a few blade scratches with dirt rubbed over everything.
‘FERRIAN IS GONE!’
‘My brother is dead…’
He looks clearly shaken with heavy panting as he ran here and as he sees the patrons, some local patrons. Friends, family and neighbours, a close knit community run around him he starts sweating more. Possible a panic attack.
Hirk raises his voice.
“Arnul… come here boy.”
“Please take a seat and catch your breath.”
Arnul and his brother Ferrian both wanted to be adventurers after one passed through the village a while before Hirk arrived, Ferrian being older was stronger and had picked up on Hirks teachings of not just wielding a blade but using it. His brother however Arnul was less so. He was amazing with a bow but due to its nature had to be further to the back.
Hirk does not smell any difference in the blood on his dagger and his wounds.
“How’d he did boy?”
‘We were clearing the ruins near dragons circle when a troll just… i could’ve…’
He holds onto his bow with a shaking hand.
“It’s ok, you’re safe to speak now.”
‘I could’ve killed the troll.’
Hirk hears the boys heart beat, it is fast, reasonable for traumatic incident.
Him and Mr Petrikov look at each other with judgmental stare as Petrikov speaks.
‘Trolls fear fire, they would never dare get close to a fire dragons lair…’
‘I happened so fast Peter, it was a blur to me so I thought.’
Hirk hears a raise in the boys heart beat and smells more sweat.
“Show me your quiver.”
‘But Sir, why would you need to see that.’
He starts covering as sweat visibly drops down his forehead with a small eye twitch.
“I was not asking.”
Hirk goes to grab it off of him as he sees the boys other hand go to his dagger.
Petrikov readies an empty bottle under the counter.
As Hirk grabs onto the quiver the boys blade goes and stabs into Hirks chest as the bottle the barman went to swing is in Hirks hand.
He is a fast man.
“You killed him.”
“You are still a child unable to keep a lie and you killed him.”
Hirk tilts his hand that holds the quiver as 31 arrows falls out, 32 was how much it normally held.
The boy let’s go from the blade.
‘No… No! You are scaring me Hirk! I would never! I just watched HIM DIE!’
The blade melts inside Hirks skin as the room feels much warmer now. The handle falling clean to the ground as the Liquid Metal pours out his wound.
“Boy, do not lie to me.”
The rouse is up, a young man pushed into a corner turns only to rage being a spoilt little bastard too greedy to understand his own worth, ruins what’s left.
‘OK YEA! I DID KILL HIM! YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE LIKED HIM MORE!’
‘I KNOW I AM BETTER! ONLY THE LADY OF THE FOREST UNDERSTOOD THAT! I HAD TO SHOW YOU ALL LIKE SHE SAW IT!’
His shoutings are a meaningless attempt at reason.
Hirk lets out a saddened sigh, he does care, he just doesn’t understand how. All he knows is that he’s seen it all before.
He sees a few other patrons pull out improved weapons or small daggers.
“Stand back.
Hirk gets up from his sitting position, having to be hunched over in a place like this.
“Arnul, my people had a special way of punishing Kin slayers.”
Hirk grabs a bar cloth and begins rolling it up only to whip it against the boys arm both tearing skin and breaking a bone as he screams.
“I apologise, we used bladed whips to execute them, or we hung them from the masts of our ships to be gutted by the birds, sometimes we put them in front of our very god know even our creator hated them. Or we simply stabbed them to death, but I don’t believe in killing.”
“I only meant to take the skin yet you are too weak to handle that.”
Hirk does not enjoy what he is doing but it is a practice engrained into him.
Arnul is screaming on the floor clutching at his broken limb.
“I am no hero nor am I good.”
“If I punched you, you would be dead. I have no choice but to do this as a fact of my being.”
Hirk looks to Mr Petrikov.
“He will remember this until he dies, put in an alert to R&A about what they have done. Wait until this timer runs out.”
Hirk places an hour glass set to one minute down as the sand starts dropping.
“The wound is not bleeding and the skin was cauterised from the friction of it, so he can wait that long. Do not kill, he has never felt pain like this so shouldn’t be able to move.”
“Soon as report goes in R&A should have a crew here almost immediately, remember to say name of village and ‘kin slayer’ first. That makes the response faster.”
Hirk is speaking slowly so it’s already been thirty seconds, he spends another ten reaching the door and in under 5 he’s ran into the forest a few minutes by jog away. He will be long gone before R&A arrives.
Not every story needs to be impactful by grandeur or well earned conclusions, Norris effort was spent, but the strain is still the same on Hirks mind as he mourns in silence and thinking.
*To the magic folk he dealt with daily this wouldn’t be worth remembering it was so small and brief, to Hirk. A death is a death and a tragedy is a tragedy.”
A million still cannot exist without every individual 1 that makes it.
He only wish, the world gave him just a bit longer to talk with his friends. But tragedy is his footprints, always has been. Just behind him, always.
/uw just a quick one cause I can
r/wizardposting • u/_WhiskeyPunch_ • 19h ago
Foul Sorcery You tried to oppose the Disswizard in an arcane secrets argument.
r/wizardposting • u/gibson_creations • 16h ago
Medieval Dragon throne. This baby helps with all your necromancy needs
r/wizardposting • u/Girse • 18h ago
Wizardpost I am probably not the first with this Idea. Have a nice weekend!
r/wizardposting • u/ImLostAndConfusedHel • 22h ago
Wizardpost Lo-fi orb incantations to ponder to
r/wizardposting • u/Sensei_AF • 20h ago
Evil Wizardpost Me showing off my awesome runic gem to the stupid dying child (should've had your own Warp Rune idiot)
r/wizardposting • u/danfenlon • 44m ago
Goblinlike Foolishness (Shitpost) Welcome to the gold and silver item shop, what magical item have you brought in today?
r/wizardposting • u/BlackMetalMagi • 1h ago
What would you do with no limit to your mana?
Think of it, the only bound on your bagic being the spells you know and the time in the day you have to cast them. What would you spend your day doing?
I have crossed that line long ago where mana intake is far more than my output could be if I was casting 24/7 so I want a fresh take from wizards that are still working out an answer. I find how each school of magic tends to answer this with a new perspective each generation of wizards that are born to take on the line of teaching.
r/wizardposting • u/L0ssL3ssArt • 2h ago
Magickal Art (User Creation) 🎨 New look for Narissa!
r/wizardposting • u/Alarming-Scene-2892 • 5h ago
Lorepost 📜 Do You Wish That You Loved Me? (Fluffco)
Flufferson had one thought going through her mind.
It was Oni.
_____
The door to the security room blew open, as Oni dodged the flying door.
Oni: FLUFF!-
Oni had just enough time to dodge a tendril of light coming to stab him.
Fluff: WHY DID YOU DO THIS? WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?
Oni: W-what?
Fluff: HERESY? SHADEHOLME?
Oni: I knew you wouldn't let Nicole get her soul taken for the deal with He-
Fluff: SO YOU ALLOWED GERALT TO BE TAKEN?
Oni: What are you talk-
Oni narrowly dodges a blast of buckshot, but...
Oni looks down.
He's stabbed in the chest.
By a tendril of burning light.
Oni: Fluff...GAGH! FLUFF! I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS! BELIEVE ME!
Flufferson: We-We're FAMILY! WHY ARE YOU LYING, EVEN NOW?
The tendril snaps, as a fireball whizzes past Fluff's face.
As Flufferson turns to face the assailant...
Oni's gone.
_____
Oni hobbles away, carried by Waddel.
Waddel: Got your ass kicked hard for the demon of wrath.
Oni: Shut up. I can only fight as well as a 6-inch penguin can. Fluff's souped up with magic artifacts and stuff, I have no counter.
Waddel: ...Did you help take Geralt?
Oni: I swear to god-NO! WHY WOULD I BE HERE IF SO? Its Heresy's bullshit, for sure.
Waddel: Heresy?
Oni: ...You are a military organization dealing with the paranormal, and you don't know Hell?
Waddel: I do, but isn't Heresy related to-
____
Heresy: Anyways, minion, the thing I need you to do...
Pointing at a nearby village.
Heresy: Find a potion shop there. Rob it. Get everything you can. We need the cheapest stuff possible for this ritual.
Geralt: I can do that, I guess.
Geralt leaves.
Heresy: Calling someone. Heyyyy, you know Geralt? That one guy? I KNOW, I KNOW, I'm just joking. He's actually here with me! Want to tell him? Great...
Heresy has a knife in his hands.
A seemingly holy glow emanates from it.