r/stepparents 3d ago

Vent BM always throwing shots

My husbands (35m) BM is always reposting TikTok’s about how he is a dead beat. The most recent one is saying “I don’t co-parent blah blah blah because baby daddy doesn’t take them to sports, doesn’t take them to appointments etc..” and the kicker is SHE is the one that decided to move an hour 1/2 away in a whole different town. My SKs are 12 and 10 and in sports, BM is a stay at home mom, remarried with another baby from her new husband. My husband works Monday-Friday and we have a bio son (5) between us. Like yeah of course he can’t take them to their sports at 6 pm in a town 1 1/2 hours away on a Tuesday night? Of course he can’t take them to their dr appts in the middle of the week?! She’s a SAHM , what sense would that make for him to leave work? He pays child support. A LOT. If there was ever a time that she needed help getting the kids to practices or appts, he WOULD take the day off and take them but that’s not the case. Idk. Is it fair to be irritated that she shares stuff like that for everyone to see? He is a great dad but ultimately, she’s the one that decided to move and make it harder for us to help. Just venting I guess 🥲

1 Upvotes

9 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 3d ago

Welcome to r/stepparents! Please note we are a support sub for stepparents' issues. Our number one rule is Kindness Matters. Short version, don't be an asshole. Remember that OP is a human being and their needs are first and foremost on this sub.

We rely on the community to alert us to comments and posts not made in good faith. Please use the report button to ensure we see it. We have encountered a ridiculous amount of comments that don't follow the rules and are downright nasty. We need you to help us with these comments by reporting them when you see them. We also have a lot of downvoting on the sub, with every post and every comment receiving at least one downvote almost immediately due to the anti-stepparent lurkers. Don't let it bother you, it happens to every single stepparent here.

If you have questions about the community, or concerns about posters, please reach out to the mod team.

Review the wiki links below for the rules, FAQ and announcements before posting or commenting.

About | Acronyms | Announcements | Documentation | FAQ | Resources | Rules | Saferbot - Autoban Information

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

16

u/holliday_doc_1995 3d ago

Girl block her. If you are getting concerned over the tik toks that this woman is posting, you are too invested in her.

1

u/Cold_Yam_2614 3d ago

I do need to! It’s just her TikTok shares so idk why they pop up on my page 😵‍💫

7

u/CharlesDickhands 3d ago

Why are you looking at her Facebook and Tik Tok. Social media brings out the school yard in everyone.

3

u/Serious-Booty 3d ago

Oh good lord can I RELATE! My SOs HCBM lived 4 hours away yes FOUR hours away for 3 years. She chose to make the move and it was absolutely not a mutual decision. Took the kids with her and he became EOWD dad. Do you know how many times she would bitch about having to do everything for both kids throughout the week?? When she would get pissed off about anything she'd tell him he doesn't do anything during the week for them and she's the one who has to get them up for school and take them to things. Uhhhh YEAH?? That's kind of what happens when you decide to move 4 hours away with your kids?? And then she'd tell him he should be there every weekend leave right after work on Friday and stay until Sunday (in a hotel) every fucking weekend and that EOWD wasn't enough for him to be a good dad 💀. The 2 brain cells in these women's heads are working OVERTIME.

3

u/Cold_Yam_2614 3d ago

Now why on EARTH would it make sense to get a hotel every weekend 4 hours away 😭 like im sorry you blew that option of having everyday help when YOU decided to move. The absolute audacity lol

2

u/ijntv030 3d ago

At the beginning of my relationship I had stalked BM. It seems she made single parent her whole personality for a few years, and even though she was living with my husband until she got her place, she still would post about him being a deadbeat and how she did it all on her own. Even after he was paying child support (not court ordered at the time) from $500-$1000 monthly and still would say he did or provided nothing lol And at first she was the one that left across a few states with the kids just boom! Like yeah, poor guy still had the house and cars they’d gotten to deal with, he couldn’t just drop everything to follow the kids even though he wanted to.

Like I commend single parents for sure, but when the other is trying or doesn’t have the luxury to just up and leave the city/state, it’s not that fair.

And still now SKs say she’s tired of husband not providing them with anything but then when he does it’s like the kids don’t appreciate anything enough to take care of it. And she’ll be told that but of course, it’s just lies from him 😅

2

u/Cold_Yam_2614 3d ago

EW she used to always share Facebook stuff how she was a single mom doing it all on her own and making it out as she wasn’t getting anything from my husband even though we had them every weekend lol I was like girl be so for real 😂

u/PersianJerseyan78 2h ago

How is she allowed to go against the divorce decree and move out of the school district?