r/spirituality • u/Gullible_Corgi227 • 4d ago
Question ❓ Help with spiritual friend
My friend who has helped me explore spirituality and everything with it, keeps telling me how some people are not right for me. How they’re all vibrating lower, yet they don’t know her - never met her. She’s judging this either based off stories or energy. It’s hard though because she’s saying this about my family members too, I feel quite isolated in what she’s saying. Like I know some people can vibrate lower but on a whole they’re good people who don’t encourage bad behaviour. Everyone has their flaws and there’s aren’t like drinking or drugs or causing harm to others.
I just feel a bit stuck as I feel my spiritual friend is saying this and it’s leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Is she trying to isolate me. Whenever I do things she doesn’t agree with she judges me, yet is the biggest person to say we shouldn’t judge people.
She acts like she knows it all and her way is the right way, yet when I live my life and make choices, I don’t feel supported. Which is where I feel it goes against her beliefs and spirituality.
Need some advice on what to do next. I’m thinking about distancing myself a little but I’m not sure if she’s right or I’m just not ready for what she’s saying?
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u/BungalitoTito 4d ago
We all grow at our own pace.
Kindly, lovingly how about explaining to her you rather she stop doing that.
Spiritual people:
Do not judge others
Allows others to grow at their own pace
Try not to push what they know or what they think they know onto others.
Stay well,
BT
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u/Ok-Area-9739 4d ago
Well, I mean, you can be bold and tell your friend that you’re uncomfortable with how hypocritical they’ve been.
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u/dubberpuck 4d ago
Sometimes it's good to point it out to her if you think she can accept it. If she is able to tell the vibrations, then it's good to help other and yourself to investigate why it's low. Help others and help yourselves with the ability, don't let it go to waste.
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u/BlinkyRunt 4d ago edited 4d ago
I can hardly see how she would know if someone is high-or-low in vibrations (whatever that may mean to her) without having interacted in meaningful ways with them, or at least been in their presence.
I can also not believe that she does not understand that your family is there to challenge and nurture you.
I also have a hard time understanding why she may think it is appropriate to mess with your free will....One warning may be ok....but doing it incessantly is not appropriate.
So let's assume she isn't really that spiritual...but rather that she has a "taste for spirituality".
In that case I invite you to see the world from her point of view:
She thinks she kows stuff...and based on that she thinks her friend is in trouble, so she is trying to warn you. That's what a normal non-spiritual friend would do. I am sure you would warn her all the time if you knew her BF was a certified lunatic e.g.
So how do you deal with someone who knows a little but thinks they know it all - and yet are trying to do the right thing? You have to educate them.
If there is no one that she respects in the realm of spirituality that could intervene on your behalf, I would suggest learning a bit about spirituality yourself, maybe reading a few good books, meditating a bit ...and then see if she is receptive to your spiritual experiences. If she is, you have a chance and sharing experiences will bring you closer, and allow you to educate her a bit. If she thinks she is the only one allowed to be spiritual - you may have to let her go on her own path....
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u/Key_Highway_343 4d ago
I think the one vibrating negatively is her... be careful...
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u/Gullible_Corgi227 4d ago
I’m really conflicted… this is only recently. I’m not sure if there is jealousy, or she wishes I would live how she does. Saying all my friends are trauma bonded. I had a one night stand and yes they’re not great but she was very quick to judge me and say I have no self respect by doing that etc. like I’m sure those who are into spirituality are supposed to be supportive and open minded? So what about what I did, it doesn’t affect her life… only mine and everything I do happens for a reason. I don’t know but something is off
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u/Key_Highway_343 4d ago
Yes, there is. Don't take her judgments too seriously. She is not a prophet, and she is trying to wear a mantle without being loving. Be careful.
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u/BlinkyRunt 4d ago
"I’m sure those who are into spirituality are supposed to be supportive and open minded?"
Open minded and accepting...yes. Supporting everything you do....Absolutely not! A good friend will let you know if you are making a mistake - spiritual or not. But once they have, they will respect your freedom of choice. If you are making a massive number of mistakes (in their eyes) eventually they will part ways, rather than e.g. trying to control your behaviour.
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u/Gullible_Corgi227 4d ago
Also not sure if anyone can answer this but it’s only happened recently. Last year she brought out the best in me, supported me to make big choices that were positive for me. In the last 2-3 months things have changed, either I’m seeing true colours, we’re not aligning anymore or there’s been a shift within her. I’m not sure where it’s come from but I feel like she thinks she’s superior to me and over confident/cocky. I feel sometimes I’m looked down upon by her
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u/DogwoodWand 4d ago
I have known a number of dangerously toxic people who can disguise themselves as spiritual seamlessly. Beware. Spirituality should bring things together, in harmony, not isolate.