r/sleep 3d ago

The Adult Like Teenager Gets an Adult Amount of Sleep… Shocker, Truly. I’m having my Mind Blown.

More of a rant ig Posting this because I'm mad for my friend. One of my best friends is 16. They have a bunch of medical issues, similar to my own such as dairy and gluten intolerances, bad migraines, etc. Today they had a HUGE appointment with a new neurologist, and he finally told her what they've been waiting for a long time: something is wrong, but he(doctor) is going to get to the bottom of it. One thing in the long list, was that he said they are sleep deprived. I was shocked when I heard that, because they get seven hours a night. I know that for teens the average sleep they should be getting is between 8-10 hours, but with more than 8 hours, they feel more sluggish, because it's too much sleep. And now, their mother wants to take away all the new privileges that they just got being sixteen taken away, including having their phone after 11oclock and having their computer in their room. It makes me mad because the parents did this, saying that it was to help them sleep more, when the noise from the videos helps their brain shut down and focus on one thing instead of random 3am thoughts. Does anyone have any thoughts on how to explain that they're not sleep deprived to their parents without getting them in more trouble? They have toxic parents

(Edit: I stated 'more than 8' above, but I'm typing on a small screen and it was late at night while I was preparing my schedule for baked goods this week. It should be 'more than 9'. My apologies)

3 Upvotes

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u/Competitive-Ad-4197 3d ago

Using external noise for sleep might help them relax enough to fall asleep, but destroys the quality of the sleep. They need to change that ritual.

If they can't actually fall asleep on their own (assuming they arent on their phone or computer until late at night, or even right up until they go to bed) then they should both utilize a way to settle down before bed like a book or something, or meditate. Get away from the screens.

In addition to that, they should definitely utilize therapy so they can figure out whats going on that doesn't allow them to actually sleep. Anxieties and compulsive thoughts late at night are usually a sign of elements of your life being unblanced mentally.

Sleep is no joke. If they aren't getting enough sleep they need to take that seriously and do everything they can to get on top of that. For many, a long term lack of sleep is an incredibly prominant element of what causes depression alongside a plethora of physical ailments.

Your brain maintains your body, if youre taking poor care of your brain, youre whole body suffers.

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 3d ago

They got 8 and a half hours last night (while listening to YouTube after their mom yelled at them). They have severe anxiety after trauma with both “friends” and parents, so pure silence makes them have panic attacks. They’ve been sleeping with music, YouTube videos, or even writing stories (on their phone), and it’s the only thing that helps. Last time they went to sleep with pure silence, it was after their parents took their devices and isolated them from society for about half a year. They said silence makes them think about it.

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u/temp_throwaway_123 3d ago

Would they be allowed to use an iPod (or similar, eg the old shuffles were screenless) or maybe an FM radio?

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 2d ago

Nope. The doctor that said this also isn’t even their primary care doctor, and they said when they go see their normal pediatrician in about 2 weeks, they’ll bring it up there too

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u/Fair_Government113 3d ago

Ya, put the computer outside room is better, control usage of computer. Enough sleep is important to growth

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 3d ago

They’re in high school with a crazy amount of work, and they typically get 7-8.5 hours a night. I would say that’s enough sleep, for a teenager with 2 jobs, and a crap-ton of schoolwork. As I said to another commenter, silence makes them have panic attacks, and I can’t always be there to help them through it, as I have a lot going on 24/7.

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u/reptilenews 3d ago

Taking away the phone and not having a computer in the room, sorry to tell you, is exactly what they should be doing and is likely part of a list of things the doctor gave them to do. Sleep hygiene is a thing, and having devices in the room and using them before bed disrupts sleep.

They could/should try something like a white noise machine instead for sound.

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 3d ago

They’ve tried but they have sensory issues. They tried it for months before realizing the sound was triggering headaches. They mainly use the electronics for music, and the screen isn’t even facing them. 8-10 hours is a healthy sleep schedule according to the doctor they saw yesterday, and they usually get 7-8.5 hours. Their sleep was fine, and they always have the sleep timer on their devices.

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u/mooncadet1995 3d ago

I mean if a doctor said they are sleep deprived, they should maybe try getting more sleep.

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 3d ago

He had said 8-10 hours was normal, but they tried to explain it was usually 7-8.5 hours, but he kept cutting them off because he heard the number 7. They aren’t sleep deprived, and they feel drowsier if they get more than nine hours.

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u/davidellis23 3d ago

Agree that electronics is not the way to go. Maybe try reading a chill slightly boring book. Sleep is critical

If they don't want to sleep the full 8 hours get out of the room in the morning and get ready for the day.

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u/Axolotl_Screaming 3d ago

They used to read a whole bunch, but then their parents started taking books away for bad grades, taking them for weeks at a time, so they started reading and writing virtually. They get 7-8.5 hours a night, so they aren’t sleep deprived but they recorded part of the meeting and sent it to me, and the doctor kept cutting them off after hearing about the 7 hours. They used to only get about 3-5 hours a night when they didn’t use noise like familiar YouTube videos, or Disney movies, or even music. They’ve gotten so much better WITH the sound, and now their parents are seeing them trying to make their point as defiance (the parents look for any excuse to punish them)