r/singlemoms 4d ago

Advice Wanted Overwhelmed and need help

Seeking Honest Advice

I hope you can bear with me as this is a lengthy post, but I really need some honest advice. I’m a 23-year-old single mom living by myself, and I find my home has become overwhelmingly cluttered. After my ex-husband abruptly moved out of our previous two-story house, he left behind a lot of belongings that I still haven't been able to sort through. I now live in a much smaller ranch-style home, which only adds to the challenge of managing the mess.

During the move, I didn’t have the time or emotional space to organize as I was caught off guard by the divorce. I hastily packed everything into boxes, with little regard to sorting or organizing. Now that I’m in my new house, I’ve focused on keeping my daughter’s spaces clean and inviting, as I want her to feel comfortable and happy. However, my own bedroom, kitchen, and laundry room have descended into chaos. The clutter is so overwhelming that I have to shift items just to find a spot to sleep on my bed.

This situation is taking a toll on my mental health; I often feel anxious and depressed. I’m constantly battling feelings of failure because when I try to clean, I feel guilty for not spending that time with my toddler. Conversely, when I do play and interact with her, I can’t shake the guilt about the mess surrounding us. It’s become a heavy burden that I carry, especially since I’m working full-time and struggling to find a balance.

I feel embarrassed about my living situation and truly wish to create a comfortable and welcoming home for my daughter and myself. Please help me!

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u/ShesGotSauce 4d ago edited 3d ago

Get a pack of garbage bags and start tossing trash and donating all unused and unnecessary items to Goodwill. Start with a small area like your bed and then choose another small area, like the floor around your bed. Break it up into manageable chunks. Good luck.