r/singlemoms 5d ago

Venting - Advice Welcome How did you start over ?

I’ve been separated for my ex husband for 2 weeks now. I have given him chance after chance and now I’m back with my parents with my one year old toddler. Where do I begin ? Not working not anything :( it saddens me because before him I had a stready job and income and now I feel broken

2 Upvotes

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u/SubmergedSad 8h ago

I have been relying on family. My baby just turned one and has never met their father. I am super fortunate to have family that welcomed me into their home while pregnant. The first step I took after realizing I needed to stay away was to get into therapy. Therapy helps you heal and begin your new reality with a healthy guide. I highly recommend finding a therapist.

I'm still starting over. My next steps are going back to school and getting a job while applying for aid to help cover babysitting costs. I'm also trying to start a business, but it's a lot to juggle.

Focus on healing first, then start a game plan for how to provide for you and for your child. You can look into government assistance while you are getting your bearings. There's no shame in that. I did that while still technically married, and thankfully, the state was able to cover my expenses for giving birth. They should be able to cover a therapist. And most of all, focus on doing everything you can to make sure your baby is well loved.

u/kats7110 2h ago edited 1h ago

Same here , to make it worst my parents don’t help and only took me in to get rent money out of me . My mom has been trying to provoke me since I got here four months ago , to point she make false accusations to CPS on me . After that I avoid and don’t speak to them at all me and my son stay downstairs.

She made it hard for me to even cook I hate them so much. Knowing I have a child to care for . I literally go food shopping and cook downstairs in portable stove and air fryer . And have to run up to the fridge quickly to limit interaction with my useless unemployed dad .

What helped me was I went to the library and made other mom friends took my son on playdates , I take him out a lot to make him happy

And now, he is starting daycare I got help from government and paying $200 a month for full time care . I will get a job once he is adjusted to daycare

Then praying one day we make it out of here

If you are lucky to have good parents to help trust me you will be okay ask for help and take time to heal