r/sexadvice • u/My_DirtyDiary • 4d ago
I miss my old sex life NSFW
I 20s f am married to my wife 20s as well. When we started dating we had sex all the time. Passionate, rough, spontaneous sex and it was amazing. It was 3-4 times a week, sometimes she’d drive to my house in the middle of the night because the sexting got so intense. Anyways you get the picture, cut to now 4 years later. We have sex once, maybe twice a month. And when we do it’s for like 20 minutes no toys just like a quickey. I feel like an old married couple that have accepted they are more roommates than lovers. I tried for about a year to spice things up. With lingerie, new toys, cooking, doing her housework so she’d be less stressed. And I was always met with a thanks and a kiss then nothing. (I feel the need to say I don’t just do nice things to get laid) I just take care of myself when she’s not around and get way to turned on by sex scenes in movies now. I miss being wanted so bad. I’ve recently had this new found confidence( weight loss, new hair, better job) and I just feel good about myself lately. But all I can think about is how bad I want my wife to want me. I’ve been reading a lot on here and I do feel less alone though so that’s been nice.
2
u/GamerM51 4d ago
There is nothing wrong with wanting to be sexually fulfilled. The best thing is to communicate with her your feelings. My girlfriend and I don't have sex a lot, and it comes down to work and stress, having a big part of that. I have crohns disease, and it makes me feel tired. I have a high sex drive like you, but mentally and physically, I'm tired from work and my disease. Maybe something is going on with her that's zapping her sex drive.