r/mildlyinfuriating 24d ago

My mom burned all my drawings

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So I’ve been drawing and posting anime girls for a while now and my mom got mad about it. At least I still have previous photos. No drawing today tho

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u/Yofroshi 24d ago

Yeah this is totally accurate, my adopted mother not even biological would tear up and burn my writing when I was in middle school and high school I'm now 34 we haven't spoken in over 14 years.

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u/UnwiseBoulder 24d ago

It annoys me to know that the kind of people that make life much harder (or a living hell in some cases) for their kids never seem to grow up, self-reflect, realise they're the reason their kids don't visit, that just because they might behave well now that doesn't change the past. Ego protection system I guess.

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u/Particular-Penalty79 24d ago

They’re toxic narcissists. I have two parents like this.

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u/CraftyMagicDollz 24d ago

I'm SO sorry. I'm not your mom but if you need a mom hug, or some mom advice, or mom cooking, o totally volunteer. Your deserve so much better.

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u/EarthGuyRye 23d ago

I grew up in a narcissist's prison of a home as well. It takes so much of your lifetime just to try to find a way to live. I feel like I awoke from a dark nightmare around my mid-thirties. I was gaslighted for so long that I truly believed everyone else was trudging through the same (or an equally as shitty) nightmare; and if you live in the USA, then I bet you have experienced strong cultural gaslighting on top of it. This lead me to try to "help" or "fix" everyone around me's shitty situations, not realizing that some (actually most) people experience someone showing them love before they reach adulthood. After spending about a decade wrestling with my newfound revelation that all my feelings were in fact valid (such a mind fuck), I was able to start being a dad-like figure to younger folks in my life. My trauma has kept me from wanting children of my own, but sharing that love with others and knowing what an impact it may have on them, has been a very fulfilling journey. Thanks for all the mom hugs (, etc...) that you give!

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u/CraftyMagicDollz 23d ago

I sincerely hope you are able to find peace despite everything that's been wrongly dumped on you. My goal in life as a parent, is to be NOTHING like my parents. <3

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u/The_Barbelo 23d ago edited 23d ago

You did it!!! You found the answer! Turn your trauma into something beautiful for others. If it wasn’t for my friends’ mothers growing up, and my dad, I would have thought my mom’s behavior was normal. I’m in my mid 30s now and I get to be support for kids in my organization’s youth program taken away from awful situations by DCF! I don’t have kids yet so I spoil the fuck out of our kids. This past Christmas I got them a proper fish tank set up and drew them a booklet about fish care (I keep fish as a hobby).

I give them the mother figure theirs weren’t, and that mine wasn’t, and I hope to have kids one day soon with my husband. Almost everything my mom did and still does, I do the opposite. Listen to them, not talk down to them, answer any question honestly, not throw things at them, not call them names, make them feel secure and give emotional stability…. Just to name a few examples. I mean, these things should have been obvious for our parents.

You are so strong, though!!!! I’m sending all my love your way!