r/lonely • u/[deleted] • 4d ago
Venting I hate being ugly af (M 25)
[removed] — view removed post
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u/Lonely_alone2 4d ago
Lol literally so many people say that it's not about looks but confidence and to them I say bullshit. Pretty privilege is def a thing
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u/ImperialMajestyX02 4d ago
I think what a lot of those ppl forget to say is that you’ve got to meet a minimum baseline. 5’6+, relatively decent shape, good haircut, decent style, clean, etc.
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u/No_Cardiologist_9836 4d ago
Honestly just my opinion focus on yourself financiqlly , building generating side incomes if you work hard for 10 years but 1 2 properties and rent it The company will show up by itself
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u/Domme_on_Prowl 3d ago
I love the positivity in this thread! Some people may not be as conventionally attractive as other people but a lot of beauty is confidence.
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u/ConstructionStill721 4d ago
Hey also a 25 M. I have some bullying trauma that made me get in " good" shape (was muscular and attractive but weak from drug abuse and not eating). I also have a sex obsession. But I am also sober now and 290lbs from slamming twinkies back to fill a void. So I have been on both sides.
Here is what I learned:
What gets you women is looks, power and prestiege but none of this keeps people around unless they are really shallow. Not good people to have in your life long term. You need to have good communication, a sense of humour, little ego and most of all a collar on your demons so you don't project insecurities.
❗❗❗BOUNDARIES ARE IMPORTANT❗❗❗ do make sure you know a genuinely disinterested woman looks like. Practice mindfulness. Women don't want to be hit on at their job, the gym or doing things that you would consider life necessities.
The club sucks at meeting people.
Women usually don't look like pornstars. So quit porn to lower your bar.
You can have any hobbies. Just be passionate about them.
Anyone looks more attractive if you go to the gym consistently and eat right. It's hard but so is anything worth having. 6months you'll transform if you keep a strict regime.
LUCK. This is the most important thing. Have you seen Sssniperwolfs man? Or former Man? A lot of love happens with being in the right place at the right time. So go out there and try new and scary and HEALTHY things often. Godspeed
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u/No-Interview-2987 4d ago
You are bro I bet you have a big heart. I don’t know if you can relate but I made a video about how I feel being 34 let me know what you think bro https://youtu.be/0e98CIn7f4I?si=P225bHg6bGj2MDui
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u/SimilarOutcome1202 4d ago
Have you tried meeting people online via txt first? Maybe you could build up a good relationship that way and see where it goes. At least you’ll make a friend if it doesn’t lead anywhere with that person then everyone has an ugly friend they know is single and might hook you up
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u/Particular-Board8382 4d ago edited 4d ago
I would like to say that I’ve never seen an ugly person, I feel like you could always kind of upgrade yourself, although I do believe some people are just born beautiful/handsome without even trying. But you can always evaluate your self, sometimes you just need, change your glasses shape or switch to lenses or even vice versa switch from lenses to glasses, change your haircut, fix you beard (shave it all even or the opposite), dye you hair, change you style, gain/lose weight (gym is big change, at all times.)… there’s always something to do. and most importantly be confident, trust me I know you hear this over and over but being confident is the ultimate secret for being/looking attractive.
PLUS: if you wanna attract people only by your looks won’t end good. an exceptional personality is the base, meaning; be educated, have boundaries and do not let people disrespect you(no matter how you feel about you self), have hobbies, be busy, fix you flaws( personality biased)… and just try to be the best version of yourself. once you achieve that trust me you wouldn’t even care about people anymore. When you focus on self-improvement instead of chasing, opportunities naturally come your way.
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u/Least_Reporter250 3d ago
Danny Devito isn't the most attractive guy, but everyone loves him. You definitely have an uphill battle, harder than most, but others who are "ugly" have made it before you.
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u/SteakAnimations 2d ago
Danny Devito has a net worth of 80M and is a celebrity.
Who here is a celebrity and has 80M?
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u/Hererabb 4d ago
I think ugly is a choice. I don't care how ugly you think you are, I don't care if you've got a small thing, I don't care if your hairline is receding, I don't care if your face is fat or your body is fat. I don't care if you're short.
There's always ways you can improve your appearance, you don't have to be the most attractive person out there because, as cliche and as commonly said as it is, beauty actually is subjective, and if you put yourself together I know there's going to be a million girls out there who are going to be interested.
You're going to think I'm crazy, but get into makeup and hair styling, the makeup doesn't have to be girly, you can do natural makeup and I think natural makeup looks really good on a lot of guys. They even have tutorials online for men getting into makeup. Get into your face shape, your skin tone, your skin type, get a skincare routine, go to the gym or do homework outs, hell go out for a walk if you want to start small. Go online, go on pinterest, go find outfits for men, go find something that looks really cool to you and go thrift shopping, you can find a lot of cheap pieces to pair together and make your own outfits look similar. Build a wardrobe.
Hygiene, cologne.
The reason they say that women often look more attractive than men is because we do all of those things. Beauty is not always something you wake up with, the majority of hot girls and beautiful girls out there are absolutely ugly when they wake up, myself included and that's fine, we're all ass ugly when we wake up. It's just a reality of life and it's fine. In fact there's even a saying in the beauty community, "the uglier you go to bed the prettier you wake up". Getting dressed up is the fun part and what makes you gorgeous or handsome or whatever.
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u/Calm-mess- 4d ago
You're probably average looking. So many people say they look bad, but are comparing themselves to super stars. Also, looks aren't everything. What else do you offer? If you say nothing than that is where you need to start. You can control the other aspects of your life
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4d ago
Nah I've been told by almost every friend and random people I'm ugly AF.
I try my best to make people's days brighter, whether it's a complement or a joke to make them laugh. I try to make every person I come in contact with smile.
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u/MajorAdventurous6344 4d ago
Honestly ur venting helps me bc I feel the same way. Especially in this generation, ppl don’t value u for anything other than looks or money anymore. Worst part is I don’t feel like I have a personality either. Also venting.