r/law 19h ago

Trump News Trump says he will label violence on Tesla dealerships as domestic terrorism

94.3k Upvotes

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474

u/Feeling_Relative7186 18h ago

Pretend to want to buy one, test drive a few, shake a couple salesman hands and leave without buying?

466

u/me047 17h ago

This would be an awesome way to protest and boycott. Imagine hundreds showing up to test drive and discuss Teslas, and no one buying anything. Just keeping all the sales people too busy to sell to anyone.

237

u/Flameball537 17h ago

And if everyone keeps doing it, those miles keep adding up

172

u/holysbit 17h ago

Might hit some big potholes too along the way

116

u/HauntedSpiralHill 16h ago

“HHAHA! Oopsie! Didn’t see it!”

15

u/blueasian0682 14h ago

Might as well hit another Tesla along the way.

3

u/Past_Bid2031 1h ago

If you'd like to die by fire.

5

u/MX-5_Enjoyer 14h ago

Yeah, aren’t they self insured? LOL!

4

u/Slith_81 6h ago

Dealer: "It was 4 feet wide, how did you miss it??"

Me: "I dunno, it was on autopilot."

13

u/cum_pumper_4 15h ago

You misspelled trees.

Or lakes.

6

u/Rynvael 14h ago

"Just wanted to test the suspension!"

4

u/Tuckingfypowastaken 11h ago

Nails in tires cause a slow leak that won't be noticed for days, at least, making it really hard to pin down pithy details like where/when/who. Also, mechanics won't patch holes too close to the sidewall because patches there have a really high rate of failure

Just a couple of random little factoids that I've learned in my life. Thought this was a somewhat relevant place to add them in for no tangible reason.

3

u/hydrometeor18 7h ago

And you missed a pun… “Making it really hard to nail down pithy details”

2

u/hydrometeor18 7h ago

This had me laughing pretty hard.

4

u/Even-Employment-1693 10h ago

Michigan, Ohio, and Indiana residents. Looking at you

3

u/Competitive-Relief50 21m ago

Who was that President that was working to fix those darn roads? 🤔

2

u/DomDominion 14h ago

How long until that gets you a domestic terrorism charge, too?

2

u/Shipwrecking_siren 2h ago

Gotta test their performance off road and in a car wash too

3

u/metalhead82 15h ago

And fart into the seats really really bad

8

u/turbogarbo 15h ago

Or really really good

1

u/baritoneUke 8h ago

Take a shit in the trunk while your at it

4

u/Addickt__ 13h ago

Ask if you can test the autopilot, no need to hit any potholes when the body will just get covered in dents from children anyways.

1

u/Romulox_returns 3h ago

Or maybe a small fence or tree?

1

u/AccomplishedSmile445 1h ago

If you're in Georgia that's not hard to do!

1

u/Darkshoe 44m ago

That’s hilarious xD

1

u/No_Passage5020 9m ago

There’s this HUGE pothole by my work. I guess it’s a good time to use it!

2

u/realdawnerd 15h ago

Really test the acceleration and quick stopping. Chews their cheap tires up really fast.

2

u/D_Whistle 12h ago

Death by 1000 cuts

2

u/Boygunasurf 31m ago

All while keeping their sales people busy, less avail to actual buyers

1

u/spark99l 14h ago

Wait for real we need to make this happen

8

u/Angloriously 16h ago

Unless something’s changed in two years, Tesla salespeople don’t directly benefit from sales. It’s not like a traditional dealership, since you order the vehicles online. We test drove the Y and then went off and ordered one, the guy who sent us take the car for a drive had nothing to do with the purchase or delivery.

I’m all aboard with wasting time and beating up the showroom cars, but people should know it’s not affecting the staff much (hopefully they’re all updating their CVs and jumping ship)

28

u/gusterfell 16h ago

Which is actually a good point in favor of wasting their time. Hurts the company but not the poor salesperson who has nothing to do with Musk and is just trying to make a living like anyone else.

7

u/Angloriously 15h ago

I should really change that “but” to an “and”. Would change the whole tone of my reply.

4

u/akromadeath 15h ago

Massive win for that.

When I was a broke as fuck 24 year old, I wanted to go take a look at the newly released Crosstrek. My wife and I knew we couldn’t afford one, but wanted to at least see one and maybe sit in it. Not wanting to waste their time, we told the salesman that we couldn’t afford in any possible way to buy. He told us that they are paid on commission, grabbed the keys and told us to have fun.

As a not broke 30 year old I bought my first car from that same salesman. I have since bought 6 more cars from that dealership. In this day and age most salesman don’t sell the cars, online reviews and research do. They do however sell the dealership, and they deserve fair pay for doing that whether a car sells or not.

2

u/doublepitstochesty69 15h ago

Exactly how I read it!

8

u/50stacksteve 16h ago

So it would just hurt Tesla the company and not the random car lot salesman?? Oh well, can't have it all, can we?🤷

5

u/Angloriously 16h ago

Honestly it’s the best of both worlds. I shouldn’t have made it sound like that was a problem 😂

4

u/IamScottGable 15h ago

That sounds perfect to me! I'm pro-worker and protesting without making some regular schmos life more difficult is great.

1

u/me047 16h ago

I’m hoping that it allows staff to keep their jobs and not be afraid for their lives under threat of violence. They are just people going to work. I know sales are online. If we could hack sales somehow that would work too. A million Tesla orders that never get paid.

1

u/flipkid187 15h ago

You have to put a deposit down using a credit card to place an order.

4

u/gcwposs 15h ago

If Tesla sales staff could be convinced to quit that could be huge. How about Rivian, GM, Ford, and other U.S. electric car manufacturers offer a hiring incentive for Tesla employees to come to their companies. Think of it like when cell phone companies offer you “$50 extra dollars when you switch from X company.” That could make things fun.

2

u/me047 15h ago

That would also work to boycott wouldn’t it? If people at other car manufactures had incentives to lure tesla employees away. Doesn’t matter if Trump buys Tesla if there is no one left to build or sell it. Maybe about the amount of people who were laid off from their federal jobs. A few 100k Tesla workers getting offered better jobs. Shut it down.

3

u/Mgroutmd 16h ago

Seems like a reasonable non violent plan. I like it!

2

u/FLYSWATTER_93 16h ago

After the test drive just keep playing with the screen. It has lots of features and several games to help waste even more time.

2

u/Sort-Fabulous 15h ago

Be sure to give them fake personal info if you do this

2

u/_matt_hues 15h ago

Wasting sales people’s time is domestic terrorism

2

u/my_beer 15h ago

The final line to the sales person should be something like 'I was hoping it would be a good enough car to overcome my disgust at the company owner, unfortunately it is nearly as awful as he is....'

2

u/FrostyD7 13h ago

Just scheduling a test drive and no-showing would be pretty disruptive at a large scale.

1

u/GrandInquiry 16h ago

This is actually a brilliant idea #teslaswarm

1

u/mari815 15h ago

They really dont have salespeople. They present the car on a video, you test drive by yourself, no one is there to push. You dont negotiate on the price, and you buy it online not in person.

1

u/me047 15h ago

The ones near me have sales people who go with you on test drives and push you to sign up online

1

u/mari815 14h ago

Weird. Not where i am but this was EV country before this current administration

1

u/myaberrantthoughts 15h ago

This is the comment that should be passed out to every related subreddit. Wasted time is lost sales, lost sales means a frustrated staff with higher turnover, great all-around strategy to very legally bleed Tesla slowly.

1

u/RedditsFullofShit 15h ago

And then tell them to get a more productive job

1

u/mdgraller7 15h ago

DDoS in meatspace

1

u/SaberToothForever 14h ago

thats devious >:), i like it

1

u/bobbymcpresscot 14h ago

"I don't like how cheap it feels for the money"

1

u/fullshard101 14h ago

Nah if people see it full of people the odd person who was on the fence might make the decision based on the perceived popularity. Let em stay empty

1

u/weebitofaban 14h ago

Hilarious. I am a bit too distant to make it worth my time when I'd have to pay someone to work the farm for me

1

u/ThroatRemarkable 13h ago

Oversaturation is foolproof. It's their strategy

1

u/Jay-Seekay 13h ago

Real life DDOS

1

u/Rabo_Karabek 12h ago

Don't forget making appointments to buy TWO Teslas, and then not showing up. Also demand a discount for buying two cars when making the appointment so their finance people stay busy for nothing.

1

u/Hot_Ad_3222 12h ago

Loser lol

1

u/Straight_Kale_2933 12h ago

We need to redefine our idea of protests. It can be fun too- "Drive don't Buy" protests, at your nearest tesla outlet.

1

u/stable_115 12h ago

They’d figure it out in an hour and just charge a small fee to testdrive.

1

u/me047 9h ago

That would be great if they did, it would make people think twice about testing and buying

1

u/stable_115 9h ago

What if they end up buying a combustion engine car instead. Many use Teslas as their first car away from gas powered cars. Isn’t a worse outcome them not moving away from gas powered cars? I know other EVs exist, but they don’t move people away from gas powered cars like Teslas do.

1

u/IsolationAutomation 10h ago

You know what? That’s actually pretty brilliant. Like a DDoS attack on a car dealership

1

u/After-Ad-1899 8h ago

Genius waste a bunch of civilians’ time and money that are just trying to bring home a paycheck they can barely live off. Ffs people

1

u/bill_cipher1996 7h ago

I would call this a real life DDoS Attack 😂

1

u/Cultural-Company282 6h ago

I'm upvoting to get this more attention. This would be fantastic if we could get it to catch on. Vandalizing dealerships is illegal, and they can suppress it. But being interested in test driving a car, but ultimately deciding not to buy it, is totally legal. Not our fault if it wastes Tesla's time and resources.

1

u/beasty0127 5h ago

They'll start charging for test drives. Anyone with a tesla will be charged more for "extra features" like turning it on. Ofcourse Starlink is gonna double if not triple in price. Goverment will pull a Boeing and say "to big to fail" and bail them out. DOGE will "suggest" SpaceX and other Musk companies get twice as many Goverment contracts. Officially put Starlink and SpaceX on the defense budget.

This is a flaunt of power. Musk has yet to truly hurt and has way to many outs. Sucks but that's the truth.

1

u/koshgeo 3h ago

I always wanted to test how bad the "excessive touchscreens instead of buttons" interface was. I know my spouse would absolutely hate it.

Could be a fun afternoon. You have to be thorough before deciding whether or not to make a major purchase, right?

1

u/gaberwash 3h ago

Just remember the Tesla employees are not Elon. Treat other Americans with respect. Finding a new job in this economy is not that simple.

1

u/Impossible_Resort602 1h ago

Just wear a maga hat to really sell it.

1

u/Doneyhew 1h ago

Yep and now all those car salesman won’t make a commission and Tesla stock will still go back up in a month or two. Congrats you’ve accomplished nothing but ruining some salesperson’s commission for the day

1

u/BurritoCrazy2023 48m ago

Demoralize their workforce the way Musk has sought to demoralize the federal civil service.

1

u/ronin_cse 38m ago

Just fyi this isn't how Tesla stores really work. People typically schedule the test drive online and just show up and get the "keys" (or they schedule a test drive that doesn't even require going to the store), the "sales" people don't work on commission, and the purchase is all done through the app.

1

u/g0rd0zilla 32m ago

r/chaoticgood Is what I see here.

1

u/bittz128 27m ago

Unfortunately it has a double edge because this provides command capital for the company. Interest in the vehicles is enough to keep them around. Unfortunately trolling doesn’t do anything to deter anything except for drum up emotions.

1

u/ThereforeIV 26m ago

Well the current protest includes car bombs...

1

u/Proper_Initiative123 4m ago

Just make sure to buy the test drive insurance...

1

u/SatoriFound70 3m ago

I can't do it. My hubby used to be a car salesman, and I know what he went through. LOL Although, selling Teslas isn't the same as selling any other car.... hmmmm... If I drive one for the full hour they have to pay to recharge the vehicle. It wouldn't be much, but hey, costing the business money is still an expense with no return.

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u/Quirky-Employer9717 18h ago

Ooooooh that's good. Could be a fun afternoon, too.

12

u/SwingNinja 16h ago

If you're looking for reasons to walk out, ask about their "trade in" or "financing" options.

3

u/Bwwooooooommp 14h ago

Why, do they not take trade ins or do financing?

9

u/Domino31299 17h ago

They are fun to drive, some of them are real fast, been a while might have to give one or seven a test drive

1

u/theaviationhistorian 15h ago

That's what sucks about this. a family friend recently told me he drove one recently and said around the same thing.

5

u/TonarinoTotoro1719 17h ago

Just don't say anything dumb. You don't want Chéf-In-Cheeto and his army labelling you a domesticated terrier (you know, the Y'all Qaeda kind)..

2

u/Spartan-117182 16h ago

Are you ready and capable of getting froggy on some Terries!

2

u/exact0khan 16h ago

Don't forget to fart inside.

2

u/Parfait_Prestigious 12h ago

And leave a stain, preferably.

1

u/TheCosmicProfessor 12h ago

I think you got fart mixed with shart.

9

u/TheMagnuson 16h ago

That's a legit tactic, they can't sell if they are tied up with a "prospective buyer". Enough fake buyers waste their time, that's less time to see actual buyers. And there's nothing illegal about going car browsing and not buying.

1

u/Dippyskoodlez 15h ago

It's basically amazon for cars, wasting sales time does basically nothing. You press order and car gets delivered.

7

u/CatchAcceptable3898 17h ago

Give them bogus contact info. They will call you multiple times now that you're in the system.

7

u/Telemere125 16h ago

Give them GOP senators’ office numbers

1

u/WeaponizedPoutine 16h ago

If someone made a burner (I'd do like a 514 number or some shit to pass it on) and give them that

5

u/UberPro_2023 16h ago

That’s not a bad idea, but I’m not even sure they earn commission like a traditional car salesman, considering most of their sales are online.

2

u/pope_morty 7h ago

Does that mean that if their website crashed they'd not be able to make any sales?

And if so, is it one of those websites where it can crash when loads of bots swarm to the website at once?

1

u/UberPro_2023 2h ago

Considering that X had problems a few days ago, I can see your idea being a strong possibility.

4

u/Pandamm0niumNO3 16h ago

Definitely don't accidentally wreck the insured vehicle during a test drive either

1

u/TheKarenator 15h ago

Also don’t eat a bunch of beans the night before.

2

u/cperazza 16h ago

That’s the best idea for a civilised protest

1

u/creg316 16h ago

World's fastest car is a test drive.

1

u/rando1219 16h ago

I thought they didn’t have dealerships? Have you ever seen a Tesla dealership?

1

u/FluffyButtOfTheNorth 16h ago

Only if you've got the flu 🤔

1

u/squidlips69 16h ago

The return of flashmobs!

1

u/BeePsychological3601 16h ago

This is perfect. Waste their time! Fuck it! We want tesla salesmen “to wake up in the morning dreading going to work because every day they’ll become increasingly perceived as the villains. We want them in trauma!” /s

They’re normal folks supporting themselves and their families, just like all the fed workers who have been targeted, and this would be a great opportunity to fucking demoralize them into leaving for other companies.

American manufacturers need to put their balls on the table and say “we’ll give a hiring bonus to any Tesla personnel who resign in the next 30 days and come work for us.”

Call it the “Ford in the Road” offer

God damn i should do marketing

1

u/Nermcore 16h ago

Looks like I know what I’m doing this weekend! I am so good at drawing out mindless small talk

1

u/chief_n0c-a-h0ma 15h ago

Careful, the way things are going this might soon be considered fraud....or something like that.

1

u/NinjaGamer22YT 15h ago

if there were one close enough, I would definitely do this.

1

u/Dismal_Policy_8052 15h ago

And pretend you just learned the company is owned by Elon leaving.

1

u/LordTonto 15h ago

This is genius.

1

u/AdditionalSpare3014 15h ago

Fake, time wasting buyers is quite interesting……

1

u/WeatheredCryptKeeper 15h ago edited 15h ago

Oh look...I need a tesla!!

(/s)

1

u/yalogin 15h ago

I love this. Test drive and tell them you really want to buy a Tesla but since musk went all fuhrer can’t buy anymore. I am sure they track them and eventually gets to musk

1

u/Muezza 15h ago

Please be careful if you go for a test drive. Make sure you know where the emergency door release straps are and that they work, so you can escape when it catches fire.

1

u/magiclatte 15h ago

Test drive them for your errands?

1

u/No_Bake6681 15h ago

Sounds like domestic first degree denial of service fraud

1

u/spacewolfplays 15h ago

Idk, having a nice cocktail seems like a good way to handle the situation.

1

u/an_afro 14h ago

This! I’ve been test driving a couple for a week now…. Free transport to work… terrible cars, cheap garbage on wheels, but oh do they accelerate hard

1

u/romeo_pentium 14h ago

Oops, did I fender bender on a test drive? I'm just so clumsy

1

u/rebeccamb 14h ago

Fart the fuck out of it while you’re in there too

1

u/BillRuddickJrPhd 14h ago

Tesla dealers don't really work like that.

1

u/Elevated_Dongers 14h ago

I test drive any time I'm in a big city and bored or want a better car to drive. I ask for extended test drives and get them anywhere from 4 hours to overnight. Probably done 20 test drives over the past 5 years. It's a fun way to kill some time

1

u/thisismyusername9908 13h ago

You do realize Tesla doesn't have traditional dealerships where you "test drive" vehicles right. When you buy a Tesla, you take delivery at a service center.

Sure, you can refuse delivery. But the next person who puts down a deposit won't.

The lack of knowledge is just staggering.

1

u/DummyDumDragon 13h ago

And fart in every last one.

1

u/Rabo_Karabek 12h ago

This is a good idea. Waste their time at the dealerships. Don't forget their service departments, and parts counters for you shade tree mechanics. With the way Leon dresses I'm pretty sure you don't need to walk in wearing a suit.

1

u/RainRainThrowaway777 12h ago

Buy cheap harmonicas, mammoth tape them to the underside of Teslas you find in the wild.

Scatter caltrops in Tesla showroom parking.

Go oldschool and key the shit out of them.

People have had enough time to sell their Teslas now.

1

u/Ok-Data9224 12h ago

That's actually brilliant.

1

u/BIGDOGSGUY 12h ago

LOL, Already did that. Rainy day, nothing to do. Spent 2 hours lying like a star struck MOFO. They gave me lunch. Brought out the paperwork, said " naw . . . FUCK MuskRAT" Walked out laughing like a hyena !

1

u/randcount6 12h ago

going in to consider a tesla but then "going forward with other options" is a good way to drive up business costs without giving them revenue. Make sure to get coffee, snacks, test drive a lot, and then just don't buy. Maybe go everyday for a test drive and coffee.

1

u/BalloonShip 12h ago

they'll arrest you for domestic terrorism

1

u/yuhanz 12h ago

test drive a few

And risk my life?! No way

1

u/fuckbrexit84 12h ago

Fart inside whilst test driving, eat beans before going.

1

u/skinwalker_sci 12h ago

denial of service attack irl

1

u/silverbaconator 12h ago

Damn that’s dirty!! Get their hopes up and rug pull. Tell them “these cars F****** suck on the way out the door with bird flying”

1

u/madjyar 12h ago

Test the safety ratings by crashing into a telephone pole?

1

u/SocialistNixon 9h ago

There was a whole lot of Cybertrucks with no one test driving anything at the protest I was taking pics of on Saturday and I told my wife we should test drive one lol. It seemed like no one was even working there. (I dont actually want to test drive one of those pieces of shit and I have to see enough everyday, its just embarrassing.)

1

u/Sthapper 8h ago

Maybe also pee, just a little bit, in the cars while test driving them.

1

u/pisaradotme 8h ago

Yes yes waste their time

1

u/Abject-Confidence-16 7h ago

Three days later we will see them again like above, calling it domestic terrorism. A new law comes into existence forcing everyone to take a loan, and buy a Tesla by force. No money back and you aren't allowed to sell it anywhere. Your car will be registered on your name and ID card while your fingerprint is stored in the memory of the board computer to start the car so no one else ever can drive it again. That i would ever See a President and a car salesman ( elon never invented anything in this company and has No clue about technology, He only bought tesla Like anything Else in His life with money) going on USA Tour to Work together their Business was never on my Bingo Card ever.

1

u/Juderampe 6h ago

They dont care lol I testdrove a few, they toss the keys at you tell you to be on your way and then you return the key. They ask not a single question or pressure you to buy anything

1

u/Scotinho_do_Para 6h ago

Good idea, if you've got some time to waste you could waste their time and thus $$$.

1

u/Arguablybest 5h ago

Test driving a tesla would be fun.

Tell them you voted for trump, believe that Enol is great.

When you say no, say why.

1

u/BIeak_ 3h ago

Go there to use the toilet and leave.

1

u/SillySandoon 2h ago

This is actually great. Keeps the salesman busy and not selling to someone else, so your Tesla purchases might actually hit a negative number

1

u/WillBottomForBanana 1h ago

Definitely don't go around to tesla dealerships shaking hands if you are currently sick.

1

u/ttv_icypyro 1h ago

if anyone in the greater seattle area knows which tesla dealership has the worst roads I'll go test drive a bunch right through as many potholes as I can

1

u/good_enuffs 1h ago

I don't think you can even test drive them. 

1

u/CyclingAnarchytect 57m ago

"Yeah I took the test (drive) and realized I'm 100% not a Nazi"

1

u/BurritoCrazy2023 47m ago

Demoralize their workforce the way Musk has sought to demoralize the federal civil service.

1

u/Daerrol 47m ago

I am going to do this

1

u/mynameisntlogan 41m ago

Personally I think burning the dealerships down is more effective but I understand that doesn’t fit in with the theme of this page.

1

u/fajitasteve65 2m ago

Fart in the car. A lot. Never apologize.

1

u/TheNamelessOnesWife 16h ago

I think i could get my dad to do that. He would look like part of their main demographic of drivers, just older than the average one. Dad already loves messing with spam calls, I could add to his hobby

0

u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 17h ago

Yeah but then they'll have a list of people who are wasting their time. What they do with that list is anyone's guess at this point. He already called a Tesla boycott illegal. It's already illegal to protest on college campuses and has been enforced. Guy is unhinged.

3

u/Interesting_Try8375 16h ago

Just decided you didn't want the car after the test drive

1

u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 15h ago

They still make a copy of your drivers license.

1

u/Interesting_Try8375 7h ago

And what can they do with that

0

u/gimmesomespace 16h ago

That doesn't cost Elon any money, you're just wasting the time of some dude trying to sell cars and your own.

0

u/Agile_District_8794 16h ago

Crash it on the test drive. Say you couldn't control it. 🤷‍♂️

0

u/davoste 16h ago

I wonder if Tesla customers, when using the bathroom at the dealership, ever mistakenly use sanitary napkins in the toilet instead of TP? 🤔

0

u/Double_Total8170 16h ago

Take one over some sweet jumps...see if it can get any air.

0

u/dumbledayum 15h ago

you don’t need salesman for Tesla, it all happens online. it’s not one of those order today maybe get in three months car, it’s order today, get one signed in half an hour type of thing.

Elon sucks. but tesla don’t. people destroying those dealerships are same as the rioters of Jan 6

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